Feels

>tfw you're alone at the gym in the dead of night and break down crying out of nowhere while squatting

does anyone else have similiar emotional outbursts while lifting

Not really, sounds like you need a therapist desu famalam

maybe, 2 years of being neet and little to no social human contact and depression are driving me insane

>tfw """"""gf"""""" was flirting with some lanky DYEL fuckboi behind my back

im sorry bretheren, i fell in love with a girl 3 years ago and got rejected, then broke out of the friendzone and got with her but being the paranoid fuck i am i started severing people from my life until it was just me and her and i was rapidly gaining weight due to being a shut in...one day she tells me she cant stand to see me destroy myself anymore and that its over.

i still think about her a lot, i feel like such a spineless KEK for getting this caught up with a girl. I should consider suicide.

sometimes.

sometimes when i do intense stretching sessions i ruin my sets by laughing like a madman. i remember seeing an elliot hulse vid when he mentions that the mind is the body - tense emotions make our bodies tense and knot up and when releasing these bodily problems the emotion is paid back.

don;t even get me started on running. a 30 minute run round the block is enough to make me question my entire life and by the end i feel good.

actually am thinking of getting into boxing and other painful forms of fighting almost purely because of similar mental benefits i did chinese boxing once and sparring sessions used to flush me out emotionally.

do you ever feel extremely sad when thinking about something to the point where you have to stop what you're doing and let it oit

No you should probably talk to someone or do some soul searching and just sit down somewhere quiet and think.

i don't get sad, i just get bitter and angry. i seriously would rather be sad.

You learned and that's the most important thing, user.

Just do what I do now and wall everyone off and completely disregard your emotions. It's worked wonders for me.

Kinda.
>be a week ago
>rest between sets
>mind shifts to something I hate about myself, suddenly my brain Lets loose the floodgate of all the things I've fucked up and relationships I've ruined.
>almost have to leave the gym I'm so depressed.

Right now even as I'm dwelling on this I don't feel anywhere as bad as I did that day

yeah I caught major feelings for her since she was the first girl I've been really intimate with

i'm mostly over it now (broke things off a few weeks ago) but I still think about it every day.

I know that feel bro.

>Be bright eyed semi-chad 22 year old (th-th-thanks /fit).

>After college, move back home to flyover state, get dank job in real estate making tons of dosh for low cost of living.

>Friends all moved across the country.

>College bros up north.

>2 close family members die within 4 months of each other.

>3rd is hospitalized for months.

>They move to another state to be close to the only other living family after they convalesce.

>I now have no family within hundreds of miles.

>Have to babysit clients 60 hours a week, putting all my energy into them. No one really gives a fuck who you are, you are simply an instrument to get them what they want (but you must still treat them like they're your best friend).

>Only get 1.5 days off per week. Whatever, pay's too dank.

>Live alone in small but comfy studio.

>The months turn into 2 years and lack of social interaction (other than with the cool, but old, people in my office) slowly begins to drive me insane.

>Quit going to gym, gain 80lbs.

>Lose the ability to actually hold conversations with random people when I'm not in a structured work environment and being paid to do so.

>Lose all self respect, and metamorphose into a living Dostoevsky character.

>I am now an automaton going through the motions.

>At least I have my sports car and swanky studio right boys?

>Contemplate suicide regularly.

>Break down, convince my landlord to let me out of my lease. Sell everything I own that wont fit into my tiny 2 seater. Move to coastal North Carolina, 2000 miles away.

I've spent the last 5 months working on a farm for room and board, and restoring my soul. I've lost 40lbs, going to the gym regularly.

It'll be hard to explain on a resume, but idgaf, that shit literally broke me.

All I gotta say, bro, is just break out of it. Go work on a fishing boat in Alaska (been there, they're all turbo autists on the docks). Work on a farm. Do anything. Just break out of the fog.

No, but I tried metta meditation a few days ago and I just fucking lost it.
Cried for a solid 5 minutes thinking about what a shitty person I've become and how I've let everyone down.

Get your estro checked fag

damn.

is that farm closer to friends/family?

damn dude, crazy story

hope shit works out for you!

im going on being away from all friends and family for 4 years now because of a good tech job and get by by working out religiously and hooking up with rando's on dating apps because i have no social life outside of the small office

i keep telling myself this is the year i get closer to them but we'll see

>finish latest production job
>everyone was emotional, crying and hugging each other
>had to turn down hugs left and right because of the discomfort
>feels bad because i know others were feeling the community vibe and crush was among the huggers

Probably came off as super autistic, but abuse as a child really fucked up my ability to be physical with people

You're my hero right now. I dream about doing exactly what you are talking about almost daily. This med grind has me wanting to blow my brains out

I constantly fantasize about going innawoods and just living off the land. Just me and my doggo. Bring the Bible with me so I'd be forced to read it over and over. I don't even have a job. I'm a God damn failure. I've quit or failed everything I've ever done. There's absolutely no pressure on me other than the never ending pressure of depression and sorrow weighing on my weak, faggot shoulders.

no you fag.

a beta fag less, please

>Bring the Bible with me so I'd be forced to read it over and over
Why, exactly? Is that supposed to be a good thing?

nearly cried running a few miles today.

was perfectly fine until i watched bojack horseman and filled me with existential feels of things being pointless, running an endless treadmill to death, life has no inherent meaning its just moving from mental state to mental state making the best of it, etc.

crying feels great when you do it really does feel like you are your only friend

So I can read it over and over and understand fully. Without normal distractions it'd be easy.

I'm on anti-depressants and depakote and I've had three occasions (been lifting 3x/week for about 9 months now) where I had to quit early because I was on the verge of breaking down crying. I don't know why either. My body could handle it. It wasn't like there was anything I was feeling particularly bad about that day. It was just, everything seemed so petty, miserable, pathetic and hopeless all of a sudden. Weird how that happens, huh? I also don't really get any euphoria or high after working out. At best, I feel a bit content, like, resting easy in knowing I did all I could that day: a hard day's work and now a well-earned rest.

TL;DR Yeah, I randomly have had to quit my workout routine because I was about to start crying for no reason I can figure out myself.

I'm the exact opposite. I haven't felt rage or the urge to lash out or do anything in a long while. I imagine it's better. Rage doesn't drain you, you know? Sadness is giving up before there's even a fight.

Big respect

Money isn't everything; it helps but ultimately too much work will make people miserable. The big lie is that material possession = happiness.

People, experiences and fun make us happy. Real fun; not "going for a meal" or "going out to bars getting drunk" because that's a lie too; I mean going in the woods with buddies or playing a sport; simple things.

> tfw actually tried to live innawoods when school finished.

had solar panels, bush cooking gear and heaps of stuff setup deep on a mountain in rainforest with water supply.

I was and still am pretty inexperienced and wasnt able to survive. Everything is so much harder eith no solid shelter and just taking a bath and eating takes like half your day. It can be done I was just too inexperienced. Theres hippies out there where I was, saw a carload of them with massive long hair and beards, I was with a friend and we all just looked at eachother silently and nodded as we passed. I think its easier to do if you have multiple people to fill community roles and make a little village.

> In real estate.
> Implying anyone gives a fuck about you or your feelings.

You aren't paid a 5% commission to have a personal life. People like you are the reason millennials are hated.