>about to finish stretching
>cute girl comes in, sits down opposite of me so she is directly looking at me then starts stretching
>look up and see her looking me
>she smiles
>nod at her, give out some halfassed affirmation smile and then look at the floor instantly
>get up and walk past 5 squat racks and take the last one
>start squatting
>when i'm doing my last rep i notice her in the mirror watching me again
>sit on bench behind squat rack and browse Veeky Forums while i'm resting
>as i'm about to do my second set i catch her looking at me in the mirror again
>she stops stretching starts to walk towards squat racks
>goes past all free ones and occupies the one next to mine
>she starts to squat
>perfect ass
>she sees me watching at her in the mirror
>she smiles again
>look down immediately in shame and start browsing Veeky Forums again
>even though there is tons of free space on the bench she decides to sit literally next to me
>get up and do my last set
>as i'm done and i turn around she is looking at me again
>sperg out hi
>her eyes get big and she genuinely looks excited
>she says hi back
>tells me she never saw me here and if i'm new
>a few seconds pass and she keeps looking at me
>pressure becomes too much, i tell her i have to use the bathroom
>literally shaking, don't even want to go back
>left my towel and water bottle up there
>leave the gym
>didn't even finish my workout because i was too afraid to talk to her again
how can i kill myself? everything in me was screaming to talk to her but the fear was too strong. no matter how much weight i can lift, i'll never be able to lift my autism away. just fucking kill me already