Gym Spaghetti

>Be Finnish, 5'8 manlet
>Working out
>See solid 9/10 cardio bunny at the squat rack
>Almost immediately at full mast
>Finally gain courage to talk to her
>She rips ass
>I pause
>Spaghetti everywhere
>Autistic eye contact for a solid eight seconds
>She runs out
>I stand there like a tard
>Go home
>Cry myself to sleep
>Will need to get a hooker now
>Will never get laid otherwise
>Contemplate necking myself

God-Emperor Häyä just end my miserable existence

>rips ass
That sounds painful. Unless you meant she farted. Then you should have laughed a little and asked her for a spot like nothing happened. Come on man.

>5'8
You'll need this.

BBBBBBBBBRRRRRRRRRTTTTT

>Cardio bunny
>spotting

Do you want to die?

...

>Being threatened by a manlet

>mfw

learn pua

>Finishing workout
>3 people at the reception, 2qts and a guy
>gym is pretty full, and the treadmills are right next to the reception
>I'm done for today, pick up my things and leave
>pass by the reception
>say "goodbye" loudly
>receptionists don't even acknowledge me
>fast walk to the exit
>look back a split second before exiting
>half of the people at the treadmills are looking at me, one fatso is even grinning (aka laughing at my face)
>leave gym

this is why I never greet receptionists first nowadays. Or anyone, really.

Recommendation for you

>attend gym
>all the staff ignore me or talk down to me
>just go, lift in peace and leave
>somehow this offends them
But the joke's on them because i outlift all of them.

> doing workout
> I usually go at the same hours
> I see a girl two or three days in a row
> we have a mutual friend and she somehow seems interested
> picturelifetogether.jpg
> doing my sets and she starts doing an exercise next to me,I was talking to our mutual friend seconds before about how to do an exercise
What happened next was pure autismo/cringe
> HALF trough my rep I look at her , and in a harsh/grounting voice say something like :"my name is #####" whts your name?"
> realize I sounded like a fucking sperg/dumbass that has never spoke to a girl before
> she probably thought the same
> never see her again

There are gyms where the receptionists and PT's are complete haters. They are threatened in that they are in this industry as a job, and you look as good if not better than them. You mock them with your existence. Don't take offense user.

Eh , it's not that bad. Receptionists actually greet me nowadays

Women look at me a lot for some reason
>New gym, they can't take their eyes off me

>walk into gym
>depressed, eyes blank
>realize I'm staring at qt
>she smiles
>look down, avoid eye contact for rest of the workout
>avoided making a further fool of myself
can't get hurt if you never try boys

If any of this other than 31 and virgin were true you probably have been laid by now

I always do this. Mostly becuase I know that if I tried to approach and try something on her I will sperg out all the spaguetti. Other reason is that I still can't forget her tho.

after many years of studying PUA theory, here's my 2 cents:

always keep one fart on standby so you can loose it and break the tension in an event like this. like most male-female interactions, it all relates back to evolutionary psychology in the days of the cavemen. by farting not only is her sexual value effectively nuked, but the entire village is put at risk if a tiger or elephant smells it in the bushes. fart louder to scare them away and simultaneously assert yourself as the alpha male

that's my game tip

Does reverse spaghetti count?

>finish swimming
>decide to talk to new lifeguard qt3.14
>Hey, are you a new lifeguard here?
>"yeah, I'm a lifeguard"
>No, I mean are you a new lifeguard?
>"I'm a junior, I've been here two weeks"
Proceeds to hand me my id and I go into the lockers.

Confusing conversation, not sure if she didn't hear me correctly and I think she meant shes been a lifeguard here for two weeks not been at the school for two weeks.

Bro receptionist conversations are like easy socializing supersets. I just say thanks when they scan me in and say have a good night when im down. I usually lift later in the uni gym if im not homegyming masterracing it

They want to comfirm the spaghetti sauce smell is coming from you. Say something to them next time so you can prove them right.

Hi me, please stop being like this you fucking stupide piece of shit or you'll die alone. Thanks.

>a 4/10 gave me a smile on the way out of the gym and looked down
I'm ugly asf, but I'm gonna make it guys

>deadlifts with upset tummy
>qt I went to highschool is here, we exchange smile/nod from acceoss gym
>last set, last rep stomach discomfort manifests as deadly toxic fart
>see qt approaching
>notlikethis.gif
>smile disappears as she enters blast zone, give me a small wave and 180 walks away

tdr I gassed 9/10 cardiobunny qt with deadlift farts

Im the swimming post. No mirin' general or reverse spaghetti thread so gunna drop two stories here.

>running in park
>finish my endurance run and cooling down to get ready for sprint intervals
>be walking and listening to my music
>turn my head left and see group of high school running girls walking right next to me
>gigglinggirls.jpg
>had headphones in and didnt realize they were inches away from me
>spooked me a bit, thought I was alone
>artistically start jogging to get into my sprints
>sprinted the hell outta there

Another non physical activity related story.

>Be getting ready for my friends recital, he asked me to play in.
>see three girls looking at recital poster
>overhear "maybe we should ask someone about the recital"
>Say to them: are you guys looking for the recital hall?"
>point them in the right direction
>before they leave realize middle girl looks familiar
>say "Hey, you're (This user's) girlfriend right?"
>Middle girl says yeah
>I say "far out, far out" used to skateboard in high school and the lingo stuck with me
>gigglingfreshman.png
>mfw they missed the first performance of their friend's and ended up watching the last student recital which was me and my friend's group
>we played Jazz, not classical like everyone else
>everyone loves Jazz
>after the recital they kept glancing over at me. I sat at the benches outside the auditorium receiving props for my playing
>Felt like asking them about the recital but was too autistic

*Haven't seen him since . -Big P

...

Dude, just stop trying. You're 5'8, YOU'RE A MANLET. Girls would be ashamed to be seen with you in public, other guys will never respect you. Even if you ever get a gf, she will use you for money, while fucking 6'2 guy. Just go hang out with your manlet friends or something, idk