How do I commit to anything?

>inb4 "read the sticky"
I did

I'm morbidly obese (but not enough to not be capable of martial arts) and want to lose weight but I can't stick to a long-term lifestyle change regimen. It's not because it's hard, it's because I can't stick to anything ever.

It's not even too hard. I've started and given up enough times to know it's not hard at all. In fact, it's exhilarating. But my old way of life has a certain gravity to it. If I don't stay strong, it always pulls me back.

And here's the core problem: I don't stay strong. Not just in the case of weight loss and lifestyle change. I *never* stay strong. Every room in my house is lousy with piles of unfinished, abandoned projects. In high school I always had good grades, but I'd never actually finish a class, I'd just do the work for most of the semester and then give up in the home stretch and settle for a grade of "you didn't do the stuff at the end of the semester, but your work up until then was excellent." I dropped out of college a year and a half in, went to community college, went back to real college, and now I'm less than a year in and I'm about to drop out again. I achieved the rank of first degree blackbelt in taekwondo, moved out of state, came back, thought I'd give it another try, and then gave up.

When anything becomes too much to bear, my instinct is always to run away, and I always go with my instinct. It's all I know. It's easy to just say I have to resist that instinct, but I don't know how. I don't know what part of me to call upon to provide that resistance. There's not a part of me I can turn to, that will tell me to keep going. There's nothing I love or care about that I can think of and be driven by it. I really do strongly hate myself, but I can't even turn to that hatred, because it's hatred without care. It doesn't motivate me, it paralyzes me. I just absorb the pain and freeze up.

Two questions:
1) Why am I such a worthless piece of shit?
2) How do I commit to anything?

>it's because I can't stick to anything ever.
Well when you figure out that you would rather stick to something than waste your entire life away then you'll lose weight.

But I'm already wasting my entire life away and painfully well aware of it, and I still haven't figured that out.

How do I figure it out? Do I have to just endure more self loathing? If so, how much more? Because I've already tried to kill myself.

Of course, I gave up on that too.

>I've already tried to kill myself.
>Of course, I gave up on that too.
dammit you fucking fatass if there was one thing you shouldn't have given up on it was that

>I ran away from college
>ran away from taekwondo
>I always go with my instinct
>It's all I know
>blogpost about shit I've done
>I
>I
>I
Stop. We don't care about your sad life. We care about your goals and what you'll do to get there. The problem is with you and how you live your life right now.

You need to find a way to make sticking to things part of your personal identity instead of running away to the comfort of food every time you feel out of your comfort zone or slightly bored. Or you'll die early and miserably. There is no easy way out. Only calorie restriction and hard work. Make the life changes you need to make it, or die. Don't come begging us for magical easy out answeres, because there are none.


You might also want to get evaluated for ADHD.
>It's not because it's hard, it's because I can't stick to anything ever.
This sounds like possible depression and ADHD. Do you have attention issues? Maybe you should get on some ADHD meds. They have an upside of suppressing your appetite. However, if you're morbidly obese, they might just end up killing you because they contract your blood vessels and you're already predisposed to blood clots.

>How do I figure it out?
As some point your determination will surpass your apathy and other bullshit.

Or you'll die.

Either way.

Losing weight is not difficult at all.

Like at all, especially if you don't mind waiting for long term results. Just eat filling foods that are less calorie dense. You'll find you won't really be that hungry after you eat a plate of chicken and greens, and you won't feel the need to gorge on sweets and greasy fast food.

Just fucking try fatty. You can always stop, you'll be no worse off than you are now, but to be honest where you are now is pretty bad

It sounds like you don't really want to lose weight but you're fond of crying about it.

you didn't give up yesterday so why give up now that you're closer?
the only reason you're trying again and again is because you want it, you won't stop wanting it, you'll never stop wanting it, all that will happen if you give up is that you'll want it more and you'll regret not wanting it more sooner.
use the regret op, every time you want to give up, think about the times you gave up on something you wanted, eventually all the regrets you have will outweigh your desire to give up and at that point you give yourself a slap across the face because you won't give up anymore, that voice telling you to quit is an intruder.

No one gives a shit about your artificial problems

You are just a lazy fat sack of shit fishing for sympathy points in the wrong fucking pool. It is not hard to lose weight and it is not hard to live a healthy lifestyle, it's just that pigs like you are too lazy and don't want to give up eating junk food.

Again, no one cares about "muh hard life im a loser and I quit everything :(((" Has it occurred to you that people have it worse than you, but you choose to be an annoying cunt to get sympathy points?

This is exactly why I hate fat people. Life is not hard for you so stop fucking pretending it is.

No one else can do it for you, and no one else can tell you why you are such a whiny manchild. You either start to behave like a grown up human bean and do it or you die a fat piece of shit. Those are your two options.

Commit suicide

I think the main problem here is your perspective. You shouldn't try to force yourself to do something if you don't enjoy it, because that will never last. Take weight loss, for example. I fucking hate running, I don't understand how people can run for an hour and not be bored out of their minds. So I don't run, I don't force myself to run, and I don't beat myself up because I suck at it. Find a physical hobby or interest that genuinely interests you. For me, that's hiking, and eventually climbing when I lost weight. The important part is you treat the activity as something you enjoy, not something you dread.

Same goes for college. Find a subject that interests you before diving in. For food habits, buy a cookbook, try new foods, and find some easy, healthy meals that you genuinely like. Lifestyle changes can't be forced over a short period of time. No one has an unbreakable will, and if you genuinely dislike the changes you're trying to make, you're doomed to fail.

Eat less food, that's all there is to it. Google CICO. You don't even need to exercise, although if you can walk for 20-30 minutes a day that will help it speed along.

I've dropped from 380 to 230 in the last 15 months. The hardest part is not being a bitch and getting started. I didn't set foot into a gym until I had already dropped 80 pounds from eating less and walking outside.

JUST
BE
YOURSELF
BRAH

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I don't give a fuck about your fatass but I'm pissed that some shitty dojo somewhere thinks a fatty can ever be deserving of a black belt

Former fat as fatass reporting in; brah, there's two ways to do this. You can feel inspired by quotes, instagram, or any of that other bullshit. The second option is a much more effective one, you become so actually disgusted by yourself you will be compelled to change.

I used to be roughly 450lbs, I tried everything but could only make it a few weeks before I started eating like dog shit again. I'll tell you what I did; at home get completely naked and sit in front of a mirror and watch yourself eat a candy bar. Then, for the meals you have at home, do the same thing and eat your food naked in front of a mirror.

Stop making excuses; it isn't going to be easy and it isn't going to be fast. You didn't become obese in a short amount of time. Every day you work towards being healthier is a victory.

There is no half assing this, there's no bargaining or rewarding yourself with a treat (you're not a fucking dog).

Make tonight or even tomorrow be day one instead of one day. You're gonna make it brah, we're all gonna make. All of us.

Pic related and pro tip; don't take facial progress pictures which make you look like a 6'2" twink like me.

shit dude, sounds like you get plenty of motivation but have no discipline.
So i have a similiar problem of i never want to stick to anything cause i'm a lazy piece of shit or i get bored whatever....
then one day i just decided to practice discipline. I have a long way to go still but i've been training hard for 2 months now and even today i tried to talk myself out of heavy ass deadlifts or put them off but all the excuses were bullshit so i went and did them.
you just have to force yourself to do it. and don't do too much at once i guess.

/end thread

Look for a program that feels pleasant to you. Discipline is just a buzzword to make you do things you hate. If you find something you love, you don't need discipline.

apparently you can stick to being a fat sad sack of shit

I don't have any specific advice for you, but from the sound of it the key difference between you and people who have are losing weight is that they have found something or someone that makes it worthwhile to better themselves -- whether it be having sex with hot chicks or not feeling ashamed and self-conscious every time there's another human being in proximity. They can see a version of themselves where they are happy with their lives and the way they are, and they're existed to make progress towards that image.

That, and you have enablers. Your family provides you a home which acts as a refuge you retreat into whenever you come across hardship.

1. You are a worthless piece of shit because of everything you described in your sob story that no one cares about.

2. Here's the secret to committing: Discipline. You don't like something? It doesn't matter. Force yourself to commit. Enact self-punishing measures for not committing. Ex: If I don't go to the gym at least three times a week, I will donate [X amount of money] to charity. The self-punishing measures have to be something material. That's how you'll feel the pain of it. Force yourself to do it. Shame yourself into doing it. Have others shame you and punish you into doing it. Have someone hold you accountable to your choices, and have them deprive you of the things you love when you don't follow through.

In the case of working out and exercise, you're in luck. Eventually, you'll stop forcing yourself to do it. You'll see the results that hard work brings you and you'll start to do it because you love it.

Or ignore everything I said and die a failure.

Fuck off man, you're so full of excuses
>its not hard
Bullshit, if it wasn't you would stick to it, getting pulled back into your old habits is part of the challenge, any asshole can do something different for a little bit. Decide what you want to do, then actively stick to it every single day, don't get complacent and fall back into what you know. There isn't some secret answer to make it work like you're hoping for, the only way to stick with something long term is to stick with it long term.

1) Go outside more often, spend as little time as home as you can
2) Plan every day to be tired as fuck by the time you head to sleep. If you can't barely stand by the time you brush your teeth, you wasted your time
3) Don't listen to people saying 'good job' or 'that's good enough'. The only sincere form of approval is silence from others and being content in what you have achieved
4) Go watch Whiplash, then apply the lessons from that film to your own lifestyle
5) Understand that what you are doing is a hobby and it doesn't need to be intimidating. Initially it may seem difficult, but the more you do it, the more mistakes you keep making, the more you change, the easier it gets. It's never 'easy', routine is just conditioning yourself to not back down in front of hard work.
6) Realise that if you commit to this, you are pushing yourself beyond what society expects of you, making you immediately different. If you're autistic like most of Veeky Forums, then you're never gonna get beyond just lifting, but if you take on board the lessons in self-improvement from working on your body, you can transfer this into any other part of life. No gf? Keep at it. Shit job prospects? Keep trying, look for new opportunities, get a community college degree, etc. Hammering that mentality into yourself doesn't just make you look good, it gives you control over your life.
7) If you feel paranoid/anxious/w/e excuse you want to use, understand that bravery is not a lack of fear. It is an acknowledgement and overcoming of fear by embracing situations causing you fear.

Ultimately, don't go on the internet for answers. Just go out there and do it.

Illegitimate advice dude, it sounds like a classic case of ADD or ADHD, the way I see it you have two choices, you eother commit to first fix your attention span/focus/discipline by meditation (it works like magic, but again it's not easy to begin) or you get on some Aderall.

This fixes your first problem with being invested in activities and committing.

Second problem I see if giving up when shit gets uncomfortable, this stems from the fact that you're super self conscious. Here the problem arises that it's a vicious circle, you're self conscious because you look like ass, and you look like ass because you're self conscious. Yes going to the gym will solve that problem, but as you stated yourself you've tried that and failed. So here my advice to you is to keep repeating to yourself that this vicious cycle exists, and by doing that you're making yourself very aware of the way to break the cycle.

But what the hell do I know, i was only in the exact same boat as you three years ago, but I spent a year in anxiety and stress trying to get out of this funk, and I can honestly say that i'm in a much better place now, having lost 100+lbs and having way way more confidence than before. And naturally with all that came a better quality of life, i'll admit that I got lucky in once aspect and that's getting an amazing job, but I coudn't do any of those things If I hadn't first changed my mindset.

Good luck bro, I don't know what else I could do to help, but I do hope you do at least take the time to read what I wrote.

>unrelated hiking picture for shits

Make big/visible to-do list and pin it in the most frequented room, and then each evening plan what you want to do on the next day.
This way you have a clear set goal and feel like you've accomplished something each day.

>not hard at all
>cant stick to it
hmmmmmm

>making excuses and cant control bicep curl to open mouth 5x5
>kys

Commit a felony and be sent to prison or enlist in the Army, if you don't have the willpower. They'll make sure you stay in line.