Tinder general

Am retard, wat do?
To keep this fitness related, my traps are uneven, whats the best way of getting them to a similar size?

do all your trap exercises upside down to reverse the size

"Are you an archaeologist?"

literally just tell her that you are going to come over and eat her pussy you faggot

Honestly I have a hard time when chicks come on super strong like that. Takes away the rush of the hunt.

Pick and choose, I'd personally go with the subway one.

something something frequent flier miles

She won't actually follow through unless you do it right. Here is what you do:

>How about you take me out for coffee first
Hahaaaaa okayyy!!!
>(Time and place)?
Yaaa works for me!

Then meet her there, make nice small talk, hit her with the smoulder and say "so babe... that coffee was pretty good... but it didn't take me to flavortown"

Then fucking EAT HER PUSSY

Eating pussy is for cucks. Someone fucked that pussy once and probably came on it. She thinks she can keep you as a beta orbiter licky slave.

are you retarded? because your father is special

Just say "that's disgusting" and watch her reaction, it will usually be mildly entertaining.
Both the girls in that picture are urgly. If she wears a baseball cap she's probably got diseases, it's a rule of thumb I've picked up.

fuck you cuck, baseball caps are qt

yikes, it was all going so well user, i guess you were saving up all your autism for that last line

i get disgusted by whores desu they are usually the least interesting people in the world

I think it's natural to be at least a little repulsed by straight-up thottery. Any girl using tinder is certainly thinking that but it kind of crosses a line and actualizes when they actually come out and say it.
I don't know, for some reason I find them one of the most unattractive things a girl can wear. I think they should be a strictly "male" article even though there's nothing really masculine or feminine about them either way.
I've specifically known of three girls who always wore baseball caps and they were known disease-carriers. Like, locally famous for it.

neckbeard detected

ha

>neckbeard on a neckbeard board
wow bra your reddit detective skills are off the charts

>So are you the ugly one or the pretty one?

That's going to fuck with her head a bit because she's going to have to admit that either she or her friend is ugly OR conversely she'll say you're a dick and then you say "You sexually harassed me, whore."

Op here, 5 decides how i respond

If you're an autist, let me translate: She wants your D (this is assuming you don't actually look like Guy Fieri and she's making a joke)

Tell her "The train to FlavorTown leaves at (sometime tonight or tomorrow, whenever you want to get your fuck on) and (she'd better hop on or she's going to miss it)"

That's literally it, enjoy your pussy, mission accomplished.

BTW, what do you even look like OP

Pump and dump, she's not waifu material
Stop doing oppo grip shrugs and do them double overhand Quasimodo

I put Guy Fieri is my spirit animal on my bio so thats where that came from

Autistic train conductor.
CHOO CHOO

Just make your thicc trap lose weight or your thin trap gain weight. Boipucci is boipucci, traps are not gay.

Haha this is great

Rolling for this ine

Rolling for Train leaves at X time one

...

Tell her I dont like sweet and sour flavor (because her pussy is prolly rancid)

kek

You blew it user, you blew it

lmbo ya bloo it user

Wait a minute, she's the one who asked again, what a dumb bitch, you're good user nvm

What kind of pictures are good to have for tinder?

I swear I am an autist when it comes to texting girls any tips? I am good in person but I feel awkward as fuck texting.

>not seeing the timestamp in the screeencap is from 14 months ago

Well she looked insane anyway, you're good

Make sure you get your A E S T H 3 T I C look in there for max pu$$y

One with friends, one in a suit or something dressed up, on where you can show off your gains (beach pics), and one with a pet (dog). Those are good to start with

while our user is probably not creepy 4channer right
it was a match made in heaven family and he blew it

Who the fuck actually gets fucking coffee with a girl, it's such a corny worn out fucking cliche.

It makes a great first date because you're able to actually talk and either one can bail out at any time and it not be super weird.

I laughed too hard at this

...

You can go a lot of fucking places where you can talk, and if you're under 30 which most people on here are she's going to think your doing your best to play adult by inviting her out for coffee.

...

Fuck you fgt gobble on my nuts

>tfw when I play magic the gathering, dungeons&dragons, and pathfinder in my free time
I play with ugly motherfuckers, but if I saw any of these troglodytes in the game store I would do a 360 and walk away

"That's my favorite part of town"

After she replies...

"pizza is my 2nd favorite thing to eat in bed"

If she replies to that, ask for her number.

fight me irl
pro tip: im black

shitimbald looks like fun

>not taking them ice skating but 99.9999% of people cannot ice skate at all so she has to hold onto you the entire time

plus you can probably feel her up on "accident" when she trips or falls

Ok Thanks man
Should I use like a fucking dslr camera or iphone.
better pics with a dslr but seems kinda off to me.

Funny AND ends in trips.
Ya gotta do this now, OP

Should have done "good, you?" again

Gotta respect them trips

>1 hour ago
yeah good luck with that

>I'll give you my Vitamin D if you give me your fish oil

Kek

What do you taste like?

>That's my favorite part of town

Granted it's salvageable, but YOU NEED TO STOP BEING A PUSSY AND TELL HER TO GET ON THE 6PM DICK TO FLAVORTOWN AT YOUR LOCAL STARBUCKS YOU ASPIE NIGGER

>doesn't lead into anything
>no natural response for her to make

You're done lad

>pro tip: im black
so you will show up with 7 other guys and pretend you are brave?

na just me and jamal and we will tear yo white ass apart

>its over

Aren't most blacks who post of Veeky Forums lanky autists with the exception of Lotus unless he got hit by a car on his fixie.

If you get the hahahaha response or something super flirty, skip the pizza part and send:

"you'll be dizzy once I'm done with you. What's your number."

Even though grammatically incorrect, make sure you end that sentence with a period, not a question mark.

>most
im the big one who likes white boipuccy

Good luck Sambo. I got that ther HIV

>whats the best way of getting them to a similar size?
you literally just work the smaller one more..

who the fuck do you think you are trying to over take trips???

Are you seriously right now? Why didnt you just play it smooth like "aight" or just "cool"

i got a gun and full blown AIDS bitch

>saying aight
>smooth
Aight grandpa, whatever you say.

Cool, come to Alaska. I'm looking forward to seeing what a white manlet impersonating a nigger online looks like.

woah dude thats so alfa

Whut

How retarded do you have to be to think people under 30 can't have a coffee together. I had coffees with females before I was even 20.
Just how.

"flavour town is just a short stop on the way to pound town "

You fucked up.

Should've done this

>Alaska

Nigga you done fucked up. Could've just googled some Guy Fieri oneliners

>should I bring my own flip-flop
>I'll put my ding-dong in your shama-lama
>I'll give you a winner winner hotdog dinner

And before you cunts call me an autist, those are made from actual Guy Fieri quotes. The girl clearly has no qualms about being crude so you should've gone for a leap of faith instead of that pussy step you took. Hope she's fugly for your sake.

You're over estimating whores. I bet she doesn't even know who Guy Fieri is.

>shitimbald

every time