Still haven't had the chance to talk to her. Now she's laying half naked 10m away from me and I can't even bury my face between her sweaty cheeks.
Round two, gents. Best approaches strategies to get to my 3-floors downstair neighbor.
Last time, we settled on "Just talk to her next time you cross her in the hallway as she's already been mirin' you, fagget !" Plan is already ongoing, but too much random. Let's find a reason to befriend that bitch so I can enjoy her fucking garden.
Dude you're a weird creep just walk up say hi god damn
how about go sunbathe fagot
talk 2 her
show ur gains
that garden looks so trashy and dirty. wouldn't live/10
>open the garden door onto two half-naked barely over-aged girls
>not being creepy
Yeah, right mr. alpah
great fitness thread
Buy a golden retriever puppy, put a little bell around its neck and literally just walk near her
Problem is ditching your dog is a COLOSSAL DICK move, so you're stuck with it for at least 12 more years, 20 if it's healthy
the fuck cares, it's sunny and it has chicks in it
Walk up and say this word for word
whoa qboa whoa wtf
whoaaaaaaaaaaaa chilll
whoaaaaaaaaaaa hold on
Works for me every time
apparently its a public garden so no its not creepy, esp if you knock first so they know someone is there and can cover their tits.
INSTEAD INSTEAD you took a fucking pic and posted on Veeky Forums
although the dog would explain the need for the garden. Smart move.
>cankles
If you're fit just g outside tanning and make small talk
Not a public garden. It's her private garden.That's why I gotta befriend her first.
Now a huge-raked black goddess joined them. I fear for my virginity brothers.
PICS
Nah you gotta think outside the box. Once you start chatting her up after the pup trick works you just "put it down". Wait for her to go away or something and freak out and say it got really sick or whatever, go give it away to some kid a few towns over. Tell her you had it euthanized. Might get pity sex too, depending on your acting skills
She'll prolly run your life if you actively pursue her. Just ignore her and work on yourself. If she interested she will do all the work. If she's not, it wouldn't be worth it anyways.
>be me
>getting warm out for the summer
>go out to garden to give doggo fresh air and a space to shit
>sunbathing
>hear a regular rush of air
>like wind but it starts and stops and really far away
>sounds like broken ac or something
>look up to see what it is
>see the most massive guy i've ever seen
>crazy amounts of heavy breathing
>every breath sounds like a struggle for existence because of how much fat he's probably got surrounding each lung
>surprised he fit through the balcony door
>surprised balcony is holding him
>on phone, see flash go off
>wtf is this creep taking a picture of me
>go inside
>realize this guy is the same one who said hi to me the other day
>tried to tell me where he lives but ran out of breath halfway through the explanation
>stared at me unblinkingly while recuperating, i didn't even know what to say
>now whenever i hear his heavy breathing in the hallway i go the other way asap
>been hearing it more and more lately
How do I tell my creep neighbor to leave me alone?
Throw water balloons at them
Or jump onto the bushes, you might break an ankle but they won't be able to ignore you
This thread is shit but that webm made it all worth it thanks user
...
what's this some kind of trailer park
If youre not going in i am
Eww. Why do nigs have so ugly tits
Nice legs on your stalkfu though
Unless OP posts timestamp with the garden in the background this is fake. Why would he have named the photos garden 1 2 3 etc
Lmao underrated
WANK ON HER!!!
imagine being this much of a retard
i know what you bastards can do with metadata.
go bukakke stealth bomber mode
fucking hell this made me laugh so much. I need to find that original thread
Just enter the garden like this and they will instantly be wet for you.
...
This could actually be real
Scp 049?
Ok OP, I am a 10/10 Chad and I have fucked more women than you have jerked off to.
Do following:
>1) Go buy a 2 bowling balls
>2) Throw the bowling balls from your window down to the grill
>3) The grill will be unconsciousness for 30min-1hour
>4) Go to the garden and take her clothes off
>5) ??????
>6) Profit
100% guaranteed that you will get laid
could you elaborate on that please?