MIRE THREAD

Happend today
>go to store to buy ice cream for me and my bro
>see a girl working in the store eyeballing me through the window while choosing icecream from the freezer
>think nothing of it and take the icecream inside the store to pay for it
>ask the guy how much in english and hear another girl asking the first girl in spanish "hes so hot would you date him?"
>the first girl "omg yes"
>ask the guy for plastic bag and hear the first girl saying in spanish "take me in the bag with you" and giggling
>walk out the store like nothing happend cuz i already have a gf
This the first mire im 100% sure of and i was also wearing stringer and been lifting for 10 months

>go to store to buy ice cream for me and my bro

that's adorable user

i think it should be a requirement to post your stats/bf estimate in mirin threads

im done reading stories and then finding out its some fuckin dyel natty who's been lifting for less than a year

Daily reminder:
If you can't put up 4321 for a 5rm @ 16% bf or lower, nobody is mirin, you are deluding yourself and you look dyel outside of gym lighting with a pump.

should have said "get in" in spanish before you walked out

i think you underestimate how weak and pathetic the average normie is. Being even ottermode is enough to get PLENTY of mires if you dress correctly and look at least average.

How the hell do you talk to hot girls at the gym? I would but I'd rather not garner a reputation as a creep at my gym

No not really it's pretty mundane. There's no reason for you to make shit sound gay. If you called the adorable to someone's face they'd punch you for being a retard.

>go on Veeky Forums for one year
>lift, kind of
>buy protein powders and other memes
>still look like shit
>post fake stories in mire thread
>xD Veeky Forums

ur right
just keep the gym for lifting

dont ahit where you eat
plently of places to hit on slawts

>be me yesterday at work
>enjoying ciggarette break
>boss lady pulls in with her car while staring at me
>wink at her out of insinct
>she start smiling and waves

dont even know how high she goes up the chain, never talked to her before, dont know her name

wat do?

God Lindsey Pelaz is fucking hot.

>See a cute powerlifter girl benching impressive weight while im doing chinups next to her
>"wow thats some impressive weight"
>"hehe thank you" she smiles
>"how long have you been working out"
>"few years now, but i've been into competitive rowing since i was a child"
>"damn how much do you have to eat to sustain all of that"
>"i don't knooow, i guess normal amount?"
>"I don't think YOUR normal is what is considered normal"
>"hahahahaha maybe maybe" she giggles while blushing
I continue my workout and we exchange smile few times

Few days later im out drinking with my friends >some girl waves and smiles at me
>It was her
>i barely recognized her out of her gym gear all dressed up
>She comes to hug me, we exchange few words, but split different paths
>add each other on facebook and joke around some

She lifts more than me and is constantly in company of guys at peak of their strength. But all it took was confidence and true friendly compliment to start things going.

We joked around on facebook but i didn't see her since since i was traveling for 3 weeks around the europe coastline.

>neighbor sees me naked at the window touching my dick
>she starts doing gym exercises on her balcony at the same hour since the day after
>I keep do what I do and cum buckets everytime
>her dad catches her game
>dad starts to mark the territory by coming to the balcony when she goes there
>dad gives me the middlefinger
>one day hear her scream "dad! I'm 21! stop!"

I stopped doing that because I got bored and probably got out of derealization mode, but those times were awesome, literally unvincible. Derealization is awesome for that stuff, glad that's gone with my anxiety though, it was a fairly dangerous symptom, I did the craziest shit...

this. i might be autistic but at least im self-aware. you guys will never make it

>be me heading back home on foot
>spot three uni girls looking at me with sexual hunger eyes
>all 8.5/10
>they move towards me
>pretend I don't see them
>"ehy..."
>I keep walking
>"wow...talking about stuck up..."
>jiggle with myself as I keep walking away

that was funz

im sure one day a girl will finally want to hold hands with you

>autism

>"derealization"
>"depersonalization"

shit thas has never existed 0 medical credibility made up by generation z kids

yeah because i suck but at least i know it and not try to make up shitty stories for a thread on a koreat basket weaving imageboard for socially inepts

alpha as fuck

Hey dude give it a shot. Maybe she's attracted you for something other than your sub-optimal strength

Im going to coke her up and fuck her brains out in mykonos, Ill post how it was so you dont feel bad user.

>get new job/meet new people
>get mired hard
>soon after they realize I have no personality and lose interest
W-We're all gonna make it.

>I never experienced it so it does not exist

ok friendo, but I was in it for more than 4 years, I can tell you it exists, you are constantly 50% on earth and 50% in space, this allows you to do whatever you want

>be at the mall with only intent to creep on women doing groceries
>walk down the isles literally looking for hot women
>spot the perfect to creep isle with only one woman
>walk near her and slowly start looking at her ass making sure I was noticeable
>she notices and keeps looking at stuff on the shelf
>I keep staring at her body 30 inches away from her
>ask her if she's from france
>she smiles and giggle
>"ahah no...I'm american...why?"
>"you have a great body, I was looking at you"
>"yeah...I noticed ahah...you just did"
>introduce myself and do groceries with her
>as her shyness goes away I get very physical
>touch her hips, grab them like she's my girlfriend
>at some point we get to a lonely isle and I make my hand slowly go down on her ass
>slowly start to caress it like I own
>"hey...you like it uh? ahah..."
>grab her and kiss her neck
>look her in the eyes: she wants to fuck
>kiss her and later have sex with her in the parking lot

and that's one of the most boring things I did

>cousin (15) exclaims "pecs" and feels my chest for 10-20 seconds
>asks if I've been working out
>flex arm "you tell me"
>"oh my god"
>holds my arm as we walk along street with her friend later that day
>touches my abs at dinner
>"solid"

>mfw

this is literally me

I don't have any human contact outside of work, and even my few friends I just talk to online usually so I'm just autistic

>lifting for 1 year
>16" biceps

Maybe if you're 27% bf and have enough estrogen to have grandma arms.

Bro we NEEED MORE STORIES
Please desu

Where did you learn this wizardry?

Thx man, its probably my totally undeserved self-confidence and lack of social anxiety.

I've been with few really pretty girls before, but never with a really fit chick, so its kinda a new territory for me.

...

16 inch arms are easy to get for some people

try doing some curls fagboi

severe depression and anxiety symptoms

Professional greentexter right here

Jesus Christ you can say that again.

>check her instagram
>she says "genetically gifted"
>fake lips
>fake tits
>fake ass
>fake nails
>fake everything you can imagine probably

lmao

that wasn't me guys, that's quite a lame one and my dentist is a 60 years old dude

lmao imagine being this far in the closet

Why do people lie on the internet?

I tried and I started to imagine Nania

*Narnia

>you are constantly 50% on earth and 50% in space
no retard you're constantly on earth and in space 100%.Just because you're inside the doghouse in your flat you're not 1/2 inside them you are 100% inside the 2 of them

dude you've posted this at least 10 times, just stop

>even ottermode
>even
Mfw ottermode is the target.

>fitness
Imagine that was your daughter though. Absolute nigger behaviour.

Lmao 16% come on now, thats not mire level depending on the person 10% but less than that is good too (6-8%)

kek
i used to get mires when i didn't even lift and at 25%+ bf simply because i could dress well

>In class
>Senior year and have already been lifting for a few years.
>I am decent looking I guess, I've had random girls compliment my arms before.
>Sitting with new group
>Girl Infront of me glances at me but I think nothing of it.
>Suddenly I feel her leg rub mine like pic related.
>Think to myself ( I am 5'10" not 10 percent bodyfat or under, not pure white, brown eyes, wristlet with manlet hands and feet)
>I convince myself she wasn't mirin.
>Jerk my leg away from her in self anger.
>Get up and skip class and do curls with my backpack in the bathroom until the bell rings
Wtf is wrong with me?

beautiful

>16 inch cannons
Do all mire threads start with b8?

Mine's been going for 21 years

Lmfa0

Hey, I'm ottermode and... I mean, I worked out for a long time over many years, but I was so inconsistent. I could be athletic by now if I slept better, ate more and cooked more food. It's true what they say though, even ottermode looks really damn good compared to the average body, that is until someone who is athletic shows up and makes you look like an anorexic bitchboi.

Jesus christ that's fucking autistic. I know I never take any initiative ever, but the least I know how to do is smile and be pleasant to be around. Good god man.

One of the few realistic scenarios here

>Get up and skip class and do curls with my backpack in the bathroom until the bell rings
fuck i hope this was real

What kind of paranoid life do you live where you can't buy icecream in fear of looking gay?

>Be me autistic semi recovering fat fuck.
>Go into gym working on getting 2k row under 10 minutes.
>Last hundred meters, 9:31.
>2QT3.14 sit start doing abs on that mat in front of my machine.
>Obviously want my attention... Signal received. Motivation for PB.
>Push out last 100m, POWER 10,9,8,7,6,5,4
>3! 9:51
>2! 9:54
>1! 9:57
>Hit PB 10:00.0
>Projectile vomit over 2 QT3.14s while proceeding to shit myself while chocking on my own vomit.
>Fall of rowing machine legs still in straps trying to get up to find something to throw up in.
>Twist ankle shit falls out shorts.
>I am throwing up on the floor in agony rolling around in my own shit and begin having a panic attack and I see people on other machines look up form their phones and imagine they
are all posting here on Veeky Forums.
>Ambulance called.
>Wake up in Hospital.
>Chubby nurse, 'user! You collapsed working out and had a heart attack. You must really be working out hard'
>Smiles and giggles miring my motivation.
>sub 10 minutes 2k
>TFW gonna make it.

>walking down street
>got my muscle fit three wolf t shirt on
>ladies walking into lamp posts
>men crossing the street to keep their gfs away from me
>non-binarys crying because their instincts are too strong to ignore and reminds them of their real gender
>transexuals fingering themselves
>genderfluids screeching
>asexuals start masturbating.

Well. You have an incestuos relationship with your underage autistic cousin.

buying ice cream for you and your bro does sound pretty gay

>break up with girl at the start of the year
>lose 12kg
>clothes fit me much better
>new hairstyle
>catch up with ex
>she has a new boyfriend
>says we might be able to fuck some time anyway
i have a new grill so i told her not to say that kind of thing but still feels goodmen

well they call retards "special" so words dont mean much anymore

the funny thing is most girls prefer bitchboi ottermode over shredded zyzz tier guys

girls get intimidated at that point i guess

disgusting

If your biceps aren't as lean as a competition bodybuilder's abs then you store fat like a woman. Never gonna make it.

>at the birthday party of my uncle
>entire family is there
>topic of sports come up
>uncle makes a joke about me being muscular
>tfw your sister squeezes your bicep out of nowhere
>looks up at you in disapproval, she's pobably jealous or something
>aunt says "do you always inspect your men like that, anonette?"
>everyone laughs

heres your (you)

nice

lmao is this even real

Newfags

when are you gunna ask your sister out pussy?

>lifting for 1 year
>16" canons

Nice fatceps, chunks.

>bulking for winter
>eat 2000 calories of chilli throughout the day
>rip huge fart near the end of work
all the guys in the office were mirin

no

Yeah, i am self defeating as fuck.

10min 2k is fucking awful even according to dyel standards

I know you cunts wont believe me but whatever

>be in gym recovery room doing after work out stretches
>one girl comes in fit as fuck starts doing stretches next to me
>smile at her
>she smiles and looks down blushing
>straight after another girl comes in and starts doing stretches next to me
>decide to have a little fun with this
>do a basic yoga pose downward dog
>hold it a for a bit
>can see them both mirin
>turn around and face them
>my cock is bulging from the stretches
>one of the girls sees it and becomes really red
>i start getting hard knowing the chick is mirin my cock
>quickly fall down and start doing some push ups
>one of the girl just says quietly, "its ok" while smiling at me
>i try and play it cool by asking "whats ok?"
>she just smiles and points at my massive hard on
>asks if she can see my phone
>puts her number in and makes her contact name meet me in the carpark in 10
>proceed to fuck the absolute fuck out of this fit bitch in the back of her car
>this goes on a for couple of weeks every time after a gym session we'll fuck
>finally find out shes married with kids
>fuck her one last time and cum deep inside her to mark my territory
>cut contact and change gym
>saw her a couple of months later pregnant as fuck
>noped hard

So yeah probably knocked up a milf, luckily i'm moving across country soon

>potentially abandoning your own flesh and blood
the fuck's wrong with you?

id like to slap this bitch.
obviously never will due to legal and social reasons
but all I want for this years purge
is to cock my arm back,
and slap this bitch.

sad part is, this is the most believable one ITT

>procreating
fuck's wrong with YOU

Fuck off, Yakob. Your kind has already destroyed our family units and morals. We should have turned you all into bars of soap when we had the chance.

I haven't and wouldn't.
But if I somehow ended up with a child, I couldn't just abandon them. That's not cool.
(this is why I always wear a condom)

I go to casinos to pull on slots

Now this, I can vibe with.

>bothering with cheap used goods

wow what an achievement

>make a tinder in hopes of mires
>0 matches in about a month
mire drought indeed

i know exactly what you mean, let me tell you what happened to me

>go to walmart with the intent of getting hot pockets and creeping on women doing groceries
>rascal down aisles, literally scraping underside on the floor as i go
>spot qt fruit pie in aisle all alone
>roll up near her and gawk at her lycra clad ass, or maybe it was her stomach
>she notices, but is transfixed at the transfats on the shelf
>i keep staring at her, but im also looking at the stuffs on the shelf cause i needs me some hot pockets
>ask her if shes from turkey
>she smiles and giggles
>"naw, im murican... why?"
>"you have the type of body i want to deep fry and eat out with kfc gravy"
>"yeah, i get that a lot"
>introduce myself while doing circles around her in my rascal
>reach out at her, grab her folds like a baker would grab dough needing kneading
>at some point we roll down to a lonely aisle and i reach down to her ass (or maybe it was her stomach)
>slowly start to caress it the same way i caress a freshly picked up through the drive thru doughnut box
>"hey, you like it huh?"
>try to reach up and grab at her neck to kiss her
>fall out of rascal
>look into her eyes: she wants to fuck
>she grabs a jar of gravy off the shelf and opens it, pouring it all over us
>we roll around in the aisle, grabbing at each other, covered in turkey flavored gravy

thats one of the most boring things I did