Happiness is a choice bro

You're definitely more knowledgable on all this than I am. I've been living in a complete depression with intense feelings of self loathing for years because of my genetics. It's going to be very difficult to have the attitude that you have but what you said does make sense. I just feel like no matter how good I feel about myself, the fact that it won't change other people around me who see me as inferior makes me upset. I'll miss out on a lot of things because I'm undesirable where it counts(chin/jaw/cheekbones/height/shoulder-waist ratio/penis size) and no amount of philosophy will change my standing.

>2017
>being upset about things you cant change

never gonna achieve boddhisattva status, bro

But your pain is caused only by the weight you attach to it. You have the power to remove the importance you place on whatever is troubling you, and it will no longer trouble you.

No. Happiness is not being a sandnigger you fucking subhuman

holy shit you faggot there's more to life than slaying random thots. get a fucking hobby and do something else other than pine about women, for all you know you could find someone who enjoys doing the same shit

and no, vidya isn't a fucking hobby

You can literally choose to be happy whenever.

Not like "oh wow, my life is awesome and so is the world!" kind of happy, but just enjoy existing. It's called inner peace.

You can't expect your entire life to be nothing but reaffirming back pats and everyone cheering you on. If you find that you are comfortable with existing, every day can be okay.

Life is shitty, why would you want your semi-short time here to be filled with misery you bring on yourself?

What is your "standing"?
What is this concept? Does it have any objective measure?
Of course not. If you're a 5'4 man, you would be normal at many points in the past, and in many places still today.
Look at how society has changed. Do we see your chin? Your jaw? Your height? No. Instead your language depicts your thoughts and beliefs and that is the only way strangers on the internet may know you. So your standing here is unaffected.

So how important can this "standing" really be?

Even if it's critically important, you have no control over it.
One of the greatest Stoics of all time was a slave named Epictetus. Stoic philosophy says that your sense of injury is the source of the injury.
When you have not heard mean words spoken behind your back, they do not upset you, as when you don't feel stitches being applied to a wound if the wound has been numbed.

You can choose, at any time, to place your happiness on other things.
You can decide that your physical standing will not be considered when you evaluate your happiness.
And if you do this, you will be happy. Because your physical standing is apparently a great source of unhappiness for you.

You are choosing to be depressed here. You choose to be bitter. You choose to suffer.

And what good does it do you? None.
Worse, it harms you. Because if everything about yourself you've said is true, then by being resentful and depressed over these things, you are making yourself even less attractive. You are taking the one strong trait you have within your power to develop and build and improve, your character, and you're defiling it and wasting it and making it ugly.

Treat your personality, your character, your behavior, etc, as an attribute to train and grow just like your lifts. You must avoid needless suffering and pursue virtuous actions in order to improve this most potent trait you have at your disposal. Stop suffering. Be content with what is, not what you think SHOULD be.

Never once mentioned that user. Anyway it's proven that women are not attracted to people with my features, other men are wired to treat me worse or not take me seriously, less likely to make more money than someone taller than me and less likely to get promotions, and also the fact that anytime someone who's in the same situation as me gets angry someone like you always comes along and says it's not bad and "just get a hobby bro!" Everytime I look in the mirror is a constant reminder that my genetics and who I am as a person is worthless and should die out, even if I wanted women knowing that makes it difficult to go through with it because my genes should not be furthered for the benefit of the species. I hate being constantly aware of that.

Your physical appearance only goes so far, user. Unless you are either looking to be a male model or you are a disgusting nightmare of a human (which you arent, otherwise you probably wouldn't have the brain capacity to even articulate these thoughts), your looks are only what people initially see.

If you prove to the word that whatever is in your head (or heart if you're that kind of person) is worth something, then most people will look right past your physical appearance.

Men can laud over they have better genetics than you if you don't even bother addressing the fact, women will definitely get past your average looks if you are good enough with your words, and businesses will most certainly not care what you look like if you prove you have better ideas than the next guy.

You have an immense power over whatever genetic hand you were dealt in the beginning.

The defeatist in me would have told me "this is all just pandering crap to make me not think about how shit my genetics are," but that is your subconsious thoughts trying to keep you in whatever emotional state it feels most secure in.

You can push through and be better. I know you can.

>I hate being constantly aware of that.
Then stop reminding yourself.

When you watch a funny video online, or see a good movie, or have heavy weight in your hands during a lift, are you thinking of how much you dislike your reflection in the mirror?

No. Because when you stop thinking of the thing, it stops affecting you.
You remind yourself because you think you SHOULD feel this way or that way.

"Should have", "would have", etc, are red flags. They indicate a divergence from reality, which is a tremendous source of suffering.

Just think of how many times you've gotten upset thinking things like, "I should have this!" or "They shouldn't have done that!" or "It shouldn't be this way!" or "If only they would have...!"

Yet these words are not reality. Those imagined alternatives are not real.
So why waste time getting upset over them? Why hurt yourself again and again over them?

Why not just accept what IS and resolve to do the best you can with it?

Is it okay to just jump right into the works of the philosophers posted in here or do I need to have some type of prior knowledge? I've liked a lot of the responces in here and I think I would enjoy reading more about it.

I find the opposite of your pic related to be true. When im going through depressed bouts I have no desires. I just want to lay in bed all day and maybe eat. But when i feel ambitious and go pursue hobbies and desires I feel accomplished.

>You have no control over your parents, your race, your ethnicity

You can change your ethnicity. The word refers to culture (language, religion, custom, dress, etc). People have been changing ethnicities for thousands of years.

>tfw i look exactly like that minus the hairline

Mostly, you can. They were written long enough ago that they're not packed full of philosophical jargon like everything from Descarte onwards is.

There are some fine points and history you may miss, however.
Basically, I've been posting Stoicism, which is based on the ethical principle of Virtue Ethics, which says that rather than morality being composed of rules that should be applied to everyone, rather, every individual and every context has different moral parameters to consider, and thus the moral thing to do is simply work within those parameters from moment to moment, trying to act in a way that builds the best moral character.

Basically, it's the idea that your thoughts determine your actions, and that your actions determine your character, and that your character is your true worth as a person. Therefore, you must be careful to maintain your thoughts in such a way as to prevent both excessive pleasure, and needless pain. Find the middle ground, which will change from context to context, and think and act in the way you think the best possible version of yourself would act, and do that until it's ingrained within you as a habit.

I recommend Meditations, by Marcus Aurellius as a good first reading. Anything by Seneca and Epictetus is good as well. They're the big 3 Stoics.
Perhaps watch some youtube videos on the philosophy.
I know itunes had the audiobook of Meditations for $0.99 for years if you're keen on that. A paperback copy should run you no more than $15 at the very most.

Alongside Stoicism, a lot of other classical Greek philosophy is good, like Cynicism, Epicureanism, Hedonism, etc. You just have to take special care to avoid most modern interpretations, because, for example, Hedonism is NOT about living a life of pleasure, but one of moderation!

Buddhism is also a good philosophy that's very similar. Understanding Our Mind by Thich Nhat Hanh is a good book to start with, imo.

that's a different kind of want, user. depression causes a lack of interest in things that would otherwise be enjoyable. user's pic is referring to appreciating simple things and likely not replacing your personality and passion with material things

i think it's about material desires

It is op, the issue is constantly creating and surrounding yourself in negativity doesn't tend to make people happy.

I bet you're probably balding and refusing to shave it all off too, right?

You seem to be mixing up many different concepts.
The quote refers to those who always want more, and are never satisfied. Those who become rich, but never find happiness. Those who get married, then immediately long to fall in love freshly all over again.

Clinical depression is not the same as any of these things. Apathy is a side effect of depression, and also a character defect in classic philosophy.

The Stoic or Epicurean would say that apathy is as bad as caring too much, or placing too much value in a thing. It would recommend you get up and work in order to overcome it.

Post ancient philosophy quotes mean nothing today, because we are much more advanced and today we are aware that humans and what are they capable to achieve is more complex.

Why people love posting ancient meme quotes to prove something?

Ancient philosopher tough that world is made of four basic atoms ie. Platonic solid earth, air, water, fire

but nobody is quoting it in modern science and gives it authority.

>You have no control over your birth. You have no control over your genes. You have no control over your parents, your race, your ethnicity, your gender, etc. So why waste time pitying yourself over them?

Its much more complex than that. You have no control over it but your genes your parents, your environment and close family are responsible for who you are. They way you think, they way you react to shit that happens in your life. Human personality is also sum of previous experience.

i'd listen because i identify better with attractive looking people

A) You must prove claims. That's modern, right?
You act as if you're coming to bring contemporary rationality into the discussion, yet you follow through with none of it.
You could have just posted "ur wrong" and saved us a lot of time while delivering essentially the same message.

Moreover, modern science jives with much of Stoicism and Buddhism.
If you google "Locus of Control", "Cognitive Behavioral Therapy", "Mindfulness", etc, you will find that those ancient philosophies actually had the right idea and are so useful today that they are the primary non-pharmaceutical treatments of many mental illnesses.

There's also physiological support for these philosophies. I recall reading one study in which they measured peoples vital signs, like blood pressure, capillary dilation, O2 levels, etc, while showing them distressing things or talking to them about their fears. They saw vasoconstriction and everything else we commonly believe to be "bad" stress. Stress that causes insomnia, heart disease, impulse control and anxiety disorders, etc.

But with some participants, the researchers coached them on how to reframe their thoughts. They used behavioral therapy techniques present in both stoicism and buddhism to get some participants to view the sources of their anxieties and fears as hills to climb and hurdles to leap. To view themselves as athletes preparing to tackle them.

And before the eyes of the researchers, on the monitors, the blood vessels dilated, oxygenation improved, heart rate fell, etc. "Bad" stress was transformed into "good" stress, like exercise is, in real time, before the eyes of researchers, with techniques that are present in these "ancient philosophies."

Additionally, the Nature v Nurture debate reliably pans out to 50/50 in most studies anymore. Meaning we are 50% genes, 50% environmental factors. We choose neither. Both are thrust upon us at birth.

I laugh at every dumb fucker saying happiness is a choice and that people don't control you. Power dictates who controls who. The powerful rule over all of you. Yes, people can control others, your very parents influenced your personality in its most formative years. Everyone here says happiness is a choice, then tell me how are YOU happy? Is your happiness independent of the external things you cherish? Epictetus himself said your body is indeed one of those external things that is ultimately part of the ephemeral flux. You're not going to tell me that if you can't lift you'll be all smiles. The average idiot on this website isn't a sage who has transcended his wants and desires. Weaklings and hypocrites. Life is suffering and none can escape this obvious truth

Then why have so many done so?

The entire religion of Buddhism is based on escaping the cycle of suffering and many have accomplished such a life.

Because suffering is not real. It exists purely in your mind. If you had no pain receptors, you'd feel no pain. There is no tangible, physical component to "suffering". Physicists cannot quantify "suffering". biologists cannot dissect it. Chemists cannot distill it. Mathematicians cannot demonstrate a function depicting "suffering" as we experience it.

If that weren't enough, consider a gay man in San Francisco and a devout Muslim in Saudi Arabia. They both see a gay couple kiss. One man suffers. The other does not. Why do two different people experience two different reactions? Why would one derive pleasure from a scene while the other was disgusted and angered?

Suffering is a mental construct. It is completely under the control of our mind. You can dwell on suffering and empower it, or you can disregard it and diminish it, or you can engage it as a challenge to be overcome and use it as fuel for personal growth.

All obstacles are fuel if the fire is large enough!