Friday Night Veeky Forums Feels

I thought for a long time that what I wanted in life was to achieve something very high in this field and to never give up. I did just that and I stopped hanging out with people and ended up focusing on studying and learning either at work or at home. Eventually things went south and I was being promoted and had to train other people and teach them my skills, that's kind of where I learned that other people who work with me don't really know shit and they don't put in the amount of effort as me. I stopped studying since I was always alone and always studying or working on something from work, I completely gave up on studying for certifications 3 months ago and have spent every day playing video games. Truth be told, I have no friends and this work/life is really painful on the mind since you can be really good at what you do and one day you figure out that other people actually socialize outside of work and you're the guy who never gets invited anywhere.

Did I mention I am so socially deprevied, I walk around the house talking to myself like I'm talking to someone? I imagine actual conversations with people...

I'm fucked up in ways I don't understand anymore, and I need to start going to the gym and change my routine. I am digging my own grave at this point

Spent all day at the funeral for my grandma, burying her tomorrow. I was asked to carry the casket and I'm scared I won't be able to lift it.

It's also a wierd feeling seeing the people you look up most to in your life cry. First time I've ever seen my dad cry and I wasn't able to keep it in.

>How was your workout today?
I'm weak as shit, but it felt good. Hit my shoulders hard.
>Got any plans for the weekend?
Not really, going to try cooking for the whole week on Sunday to save some time on weekday nights. Probably will be some kind of chicken, might try something new.
>Got any feels to get off your chest?
I feel great today. Got some good stuff done at work, making progress on lifts. My ex is turning into a blimp and going full SJW and I feel like I dodged a bullet. How about you, user?

>Did I mention I am so socially deprevied, I walk around the house talking to myself like I'm talking to someone? I imagine actual conversations with people...

desu I do this too and I have friends

My workout was pretty good. Finally started doing weighted pull ups and my DL and Squats are getting easier.

Otherwise I'm not so good. Im not managing my schedule very well so Im a little behind on 2 of my Uni classes. Also, there is this girl I've been friends with for a while who I think is dropping hints. But I think she is only doing this because she is in an LDR and wants more attention. I don't want to be her beta but I dont want to let something good pass me by.

I can lift but am still socially retarded. I dont know what to do guys, I answered questions in my history course and some jackass behind me calls me a nerd. I think im just too self aware. And now thats all i can think about even though everyone else can shrug it off.

Can't eat or train how I would like because I'm staying with relatives to flee the huricane

what do I do bros? I have a gym tonight but not tomorrow(sat)-monday

and there isn't enough high protein foods here for me to meet my macros/ration foods

and Irma might flood my house

i'm doing swell. got engaged to my girlfriend earlier this week. hit the gym post work, ate some crockpot chili that's been going since this morning, and just cracked a tall boy nitro porter.

fiance's on a girls weekend, so tomorrow a couple of buddies and i are going to go camping down by the river and do some fishing.

sorry to hear brah. It'll be okay and you'll be fine carrying it. Just grive as much as you need to

>I've opened a bottle of Jack Daniels, let's hang out.
I quit drinking in favor of pure gains progress but good choice my dude. I will drink some on halloween when I watch The Shining. It's tradition at this point.
>How was your workout today?
It was pretty good. 6th day in a row and should take a rest day tomorrow but I don't wanna. Lifting is one of the only things that makes me feel good.
>Got any plans for the weekend?
Working on my career hopefully. I spend a lot of time just watching vidya speedruns because of depression.
>Got any feels to get off your chest?
Still struggling with the ex breaking up with me a year ago. Pretty severe depression and anxiety. Don't want any pity points though, I'm working on it the best I can. May go for some more counseling soon. A qt messaged me on tinder so hopefully that moves forward.

Hope you have a good Friday night anons.

After a week of cutting back and counting cals, I finally get to eat to fully satiated.
Feels. Good. Man.

talking about the pain of a breakup always helps
also watch this

youtube.com/watch?v=p5EZCHbu6tQ

High school?

Just bought a weight set for home cause too awkward to go to a gym.

Feel like I went overboard. Now stressing about money.

So a typical Friday.

20h, getting ready to dig into work, drinking first proton shake of the night, would still need 60g proteins and have 450 kcals left, guess I'm gonna make it today.

Push day today, am sore already, also did a 10km run afterwards. I still did not get my timing right, need 2km in 10 mins, did in 12 mins.

Guess I'm going to get together with family tomorrow, no plans on sunday, kinda am hoping to go to the beach soon, I suddenly miss swimming on seawater.

Still not sure if I should chase sluts around, or wait for some wife material to get into my life.

Dude. is sex even real? or is it just a meme? I'm 27 and never been on a date and to imagine a girl willing to fuck me is out of the realm of possibility like jumping off a cliff and flying around the earth like superman. what is sex? you just stick your thing in her hole?then, Lamo sex bruh!

Got my bench press up to a measly 135lb/61.5kg.

I am babby, but I'll be king of the babbies yet.

Having trouble bros.

Since January I'd been hitting the gym regularly. Four nights a week and running or cycling in between. Was starting to get in shape, feel better about myself, the works.

Stopped smoking dope, cut down on tobacco. Only drinking was a glass of red wine some nights for antioxidants.

Started seeing a co-worker. Had crazy sex and we really clicked. I'm a weird guy, and all of a sudden I'm with someone who actually has a lot in common with me. Similar interests, etc.

I go home in July to visit family. My dog is dying. The only remnant of my personal family from when I was married. Raised since she was a pup. She dies the day after I get back from vacation, took a quick turn.

Really brings me down. A week later, girl leaves me. Wants to be able to fuck other people and decides she didn't like me enough to be monogamous.

Fast forward to today. All I do is work. Haven't been to the gym since. Can't muster the enthusiasm. Still ride bike when the weather is nice but not often enough. Smoking dope and tobacco a lot more just to stay ahead of the crippling depression. Drinking more too. Can already see my modest gains melting.

But I just can't shake this shitty feeling. Why bother getting in shape if I'm such a weirdo chicks won't want to be with me anyway? I'm 35 now and my future looks like a black hole. All I want to do is sleep.

Cant motivate myself to get fit anymore because what's the point? Looking good is pointless if it brings you nothing. And I'm strong enough to handle most tasks my work and life bring me.

Help me bros. I want to be well. Happy. Fit. But just can't make the logic line up.

Also because my confidence took a hit, I absolutely dread the idea of working out publicly. Would like to have a home gym some day but can't afford my own place.

What can I do?

>tfw backed up and accidentally ran over my cat
>took it to the vet
>they had to put it down
>it was 14 years old when i got it now i'm 27
feels bad man

am I not making any gains by working out at 8pm? it's usually earlier but had to study for russian test so was up late

>Not hiking to the hike location
Never gonna make it

>Tfw gym is closed till Wednesday due to hurricane

>been talking to this girl almost every day for weeks
>shes moving to where i live in a week or so
>im forever alone and have basically no one else to talk to
>she thinks im hot as hell and loves my body
>end up going fully autistic and get mad because she was ignoring me (didnt have wifi) and i told her not to talk to me again

My autism fucked me over. Anything I can do to recover?

Read The Myth of Sisyphus by Albert Camus. Its short, not "donxt worry be happy" bullshit either, but it shifted my perception of life, how I lived it, and why.

tomorrow I'm going to exercise for the first time in a week. my heart needed to recover from a day of shit tons of caffeine + low potassium and now I feel great.

>3 years of lifting, some nice natty gains, nothing over the top, but at least it gets grills
>travel for 8 months
>back to skinny fat
>having trouble going back to the gym and disciplining my diet again
>sister commented how i got fatter for the first time in years

i began to hate myself so fucking much again

>end up going fully autistic and get mad because she was ignoring me (didnt have wifi) and i told her not to talk to me again
good lawd son you dun fucked up big time, now she knows you're an insecure fuck.
no idea if you can recover, her view of you will have changed but hopefully she likes you enough to look past it

My workout yesterday was great. I am hoping the gym is open tomorrow because I am psyched. My day today was better than most. Hung out with a friend from school, then met some others to hang out and smoke copious (not really) amounts of marijuana.
I realize I want to talk to my close friends about my oneitis situation less and I think this is the first step toward moving on.

I get off work at midnight
Then it's time for the gym
Then it's time for beer to drink the loneliness away

That's not autism mate, that's just being a controlling cunt. She's much better off without you.

I need some advice from a wiser brother.
I'm hitting it off pretty big with this chick. Thing is I just have it in the back of my mind that I know for a fact it's gonna end eventually because nothing is permanent, and relationships barely ever last. I don't even want it to last forever, but it's like I'm not letting myself indulge in our relationship fully because I know for a fact it's going to hurt when it's over so I prematurely shut myself off from letting myself develop feelings. How do I just let myself go and enjoy it while it lasts?

>deleted all my porn
>emptied my recycle bin to make sure
>deleted pornhub account, javlibrary account, exhentai login data and cleared history
>cleared around 250GB of disk space

she must have a dick, because you sound like a fag.

this is exactly what id expect someone whos never had sex before to say, pretty spot on
>stick your thing in her hole?
yea and then you do the hokey pokey and pull yourself out, thats what its all about

>Got any feels to get off your chest?
Many years ago in the summer, my father and I were on the way to comic con. We were almost in the front doors when he told me we had to go. He ended up taking us to the hospital where he sat down and waited for a doctor to tell him he was having a massive heart attack. I stood next to him as they laid him down on the bed and put their plugs all around him. That was the first time I had ever seen him cry and he was looking me in the eye while doing it. I refused to cry then because I didn't want him to see someone weak standing next to him when he needed a hand to hold. The doctors eventually took him away and I sat in the waiting room for a few hours until the rest of my family came over. I haven't cried since, and I've never been able to feel really sad about anything. All I feel toward anyone else's pain is "oh yeah that's sad".

That is, until a few months ago. A family friend, a woman I had known my whole life and who I loved dearly died. She had been sick for months and I knew it was bad, but I couldn't really grasp how bad it was or how bad I should have been feeling until that day. When I saw her on her bed it all came loose. I cried all day and even now her memory still brings tears to my eyes. That and the memory of my father on that bed with his tear eyes are the only things that hit me.

I don't want to think about what'll happen if my dad's heart comes for him again. She was my friend and I loved her, but he's my dad. He's the best man I know, my idol. I don't know guys. I don't know.

IM GOING TO IT FIT. IM GOING TO PICK A HOBBY THIS WEEK AND GO TO A CLASS FOR IT. GIVE ME POWER

>
>How was your workout today?
Good. I had bad fuckarounditis for two months and lost gains and am finally surpassing my shitty novice lifts from last april.

>Got any plans for the weekend?
Pop's birthday, gonna head home from college. My amazonian gf is hanging with me tonight as is

>Got any feels to get off your chest?
I feel utterly autistic about my current romantic situation.
> be me last year, freshman virgin seeking ons, then fwb, then gf as time grew
> meet qt shy weeb (almost certain a virgin) who I dump my emotional investment into as a possible gf
> hard to find her, harder to get to know her, all signs point to "fug off weirdo" due to her super avoidant behavior
> rationalize as her being autistic
> ass backwards my way into amazonian muscle girl gf who disregards my pubertal gyno, manlet ass.
> irish virgin with rightwing christian upbringing, seems like a guy's brain in a girls body
> im her first everything, but still yearn for qt weeb.
> slowly lose feelings for weeb over summer as she continually brushes me off
> i saw her today and it flooded back
> somebody fucking kill me because im honestly just retarded at this point.

Nice! I remember the first time I did one plate and that was the shit back in the day!

I'm a specific type of engineer and as of this year I completed some projects in Florida. I've just come to the realization that if this hurricane will be horrible, than the client might give our company the re-design project again. We have everything and I know what to do, but I'm just thinking if Orlando gets hit really badly, than holy fuck my workload will increase and in the next few months I might be right back whee I started with this project

GIVING POWER
But really, what are you thinking of doing Sempai?

stay safe bros k peaceout bye

youtube.com/watch?v=4Egqz-0HY_M

>be me
>fuck school up
>fuck health up
>fuck work up
>fuck relationship(s) up
>end up in debt of $100k
>end up homeless
>end up binge drinking constantly because of alcoholic tendencies
>wasting away
>tfw my birthday is in four days
>tfw thats the only good thing that has happened this year

I had dreams of being an astronaut and did my schooling accordingly. I was a senior in mechanical engineering before everything went to shit. Now its a wasted dream and here I am about to be a 26 year old loser.

I miss everything about my previous self. I miss being that funny smart dude with a respectable background. I miss benching three plates. I miss interacting with my professors and peers. I miss socializing with all these well rounded aspiring individuals.

I know its all about your attitude and not the situation and I know things get better but its such a slow process...

hold me, Veeky Forums... I want my degree, I want to attain my goals, I want things to go back to how they were.

Have any of you overcome anxiety attacks without meds? I have at least one per day and I'm getting real fed up with them.

i was thinking of learning another language. As cliche as this sounds i want to travel and work in another country.

>tired of everything.
>recently bought some supplements and nootropics to help with nutrition/depression but they have not worked.
>keep fucking up my cut, extending the cut further
>too much fatigue for a good gym session today
>hate everyone around me.
>constantly reminded of every social fuck-up i've made
7 months later and I still think of her everyday.
On one hand, I've made some social gains and I think I'm starting to get good at this. On the other hand, I can't stand most people even when I am in a good mood.

>mfw almost every attempt to ask a girl out ends in rejection
>mfw one said yes once
>mfw she ghosted me after

I think I'm gonna stick to hookers, I can pay them to ignore my social retardation and ugly face, also someone once told me that depression is caused by chemical imbalances in muh brain, can I go to the doctors and get that checked out?

>How was your workout today?
>Got any feels to get off your chest?
I had just finished my first set of bench press, when my mom called me and told she was diagnosed with breast cancer. I don't know what to do right now. It hurts so much.

Earlier this night I got into an argument with my gf on the phone and she completely snapped. All-out screaming and not very rational. She told me in the past she had some anger management issues which I didn't think was a big issue. But holy shit. This was a side of her that I didn't know and I'm a little scared of it. I don't know what to do, what to feel, what to think.

I feel like a piece of shit for triggering her anger issues but at the same time I don't think it was justified. I can't sleep and I definitely can't call her. It's going to be a long, shitty night.

My mother is still fighting against hers.
Be patient with her, present, supportive, and maintain a positive outlook.

I'm not good with words but if you take that simple advice seriously, it might serve as a guide through the hard times.
Best of luck, wish you well.

>fall approaches
>it's another "user referees soccer all day on saturday, even though he wants to watch college football all day, because otherwise he will be a shut in watching college football all day saturday and nfl all day sunday never leaving his room"

at least im getting sunlight and exercise. pathetic. sure i make kind of decent money doing it (usually $150-$200 a day) but who cares

Workout was good. Been getting into this guy named Jocko a lot lately. I work at a coffeeshop and was fucking up for awhile showing up late.
Started tapping into this dude's ethos and now I'm waking up at 4:30 am, 2 hours before work. I smoke a bowl with some green tea and head down to the gym. Today did legs with some shoulder work. Then easily slided into work at 6:30am. I feel like I've already won the day by the time I get there. Really feeds into my self esteem. Love this new routine. I'd recommend anyone try it out. The trick is melatonin to get to bed around 10pm.
Do this enough nights in a row and it'll become easy. It's fucking worth it. Trust me. It's changing my life. Granted it's this and a cascade of other changes I've been making, but srs guys, do it. You'll consider yourself a god.

Good evening fine fellows.

>How was your workout today?

Couldn't go because my power steering pump is stuck on and it drained my battery. Just recharged it and disconnected so I can get to work tomorrow.

>Got any plans for the weekend?
No, got called into work tomorrow and have to be in a 6:30. This is the 6th day in a row, I'm going to have to drag myself to the gym afterwards.

>Got any feels to get off your chest?

Turn 27 next month and no gf, still appllying like mad for a better jobs and generally feeling like shit. I haven't been this depressed in my entire life. On the plus side it looks like hurricane Irma will be missing us instead of the direct hit that was predicted.

Man I am so sorry, user. This hits hard, do you have anyone to talk it out with?

>posting a slightly less depressing Wojak so I don't feel any worse.

i've been sick for the past week so no working out (inb4 pussy)

there is the whole semester ahead of me in college and i already feel burned out and tired, it'll probably hurt my gpa

fuck anxiety, mane

>girl weekend
Wew lad. She about to get dicked tonight

It's been 4 weeks since I last lifted, but I am too anxious and depressed to lift a muscle. Unfortunately I am also broke so I can't self-medicate with booze.

Just fuck my shit up...

>tfw when you're like that

Just started bulking this week. Managing it. Changed my routine up too.
>invited qt I nearly hooked up with last weekend over for dinner
>she has friends staying over all week
>guess I'll ask her out again next week, but it's not looking good
>make the dinner anyway
>roommate is my "date"
"Hell, I'd fuck you if you made me this, user."
>"The night is young."
We had pic related. Chicken fettuccini alfredo. Shit was dank.

how did you make the alfredo

or is it from a bottle

tell him to go fuck himself next time.

haha yeah faggot you're such a nerd, knowing things and shit. what a fucking retard

>How was your workout today?
Not good, came home after class exhausted as I'm still recovering from a nasty bout of diarrhea, which came just as my classes were starting for the semester, so couple illness with no sleep= failed set after failed set, did some light arm exercises and called it a day.

>Any plans for the weekend
There are places I could be, but honestly don't really feel like being. I'd like to be in a social group that has women, just being able to stretch my legs and give it a go would be better than literally never interacting with women. I've got a few bros I could have beers with, but I've just been growing distant with them as of late. I'm probably just gonna get my shit together and try to get moving ahead in my courses, do some work outside and maybe go for a hike if it's nice.

>Got any feels to get off your chest?
I think the last time I've talked with a woman who wasn't family was at least 6 months ago. I don't really have any social anxiety issues, and I've never had any problems just talking to women like a normal person, I just don't really even have access to women as my faculty is 98% male and my friends are all dudes with no party connections either. Beyond cold approaching around campus, I genuinely think it might be another 4 months before I even talk to one. I'm happy with where the rest of my life is going but my brain and my dick just won't let this issue not become paramount to all the other things going on in my life.

This If he's a little bitch boy, he'll shut up and everybody will know
If he's a true shithead and fights you over it, you can kick his ass and call self defense
If he's a true shithead and fights you over it and kicks YOUR ass, at least you stood up for yourself

He's not your elder, he's not your employer, he's nothing. You're equal at best. Never take shit from people like that. Defend yourself always.

not going into details
My life is falling apart and I have become an absolutely patethic low life.
Thinking about running away because I am afraid of how people will see me.
Recently I have found out about some emergency psychological help, maybe I will go there.
Stopped seriously working out long ago, only doing a few exercises to keep me fit.
Life is bad and future looks even worse, so hopefully I get out of this mess, regardless how.

Alcohol makes me feel better than any other drug. I fear one day that I'll become an alcoholic. Its effects are so powerful that my personality changes completely. All of my close "
"friends" notice the change. The sad thing is they'd all rather be friends with drunk/buzzed alex than sober alex. I'm normal when I'm drunk and I return to alex pre 8th grade when everything was beautiful.

Feels bad.

Some super slut broke my heart a few years back so I decided to amp up my gym gains and do harder stuff than test
Fast forward, now I look like a super Chad but normal girls want nothing to to with me other than light flirting
My sex life consists of going to dance clubs where drunk sluts constantly approach me for one night stands
Last weekend I went home with a hot 20 yr old Latina, she had cocaine and I had never tried it before, we ended up having amazing sex for three hours then I spent the next day throwing up. Wednesday I found out I caught ghonorrea from her and we both got treated. She wants to be fuck buddies and I will fuck her again

I've given up hope for any real relationship and have accepted this lifestyle, it's not bad really, you get new on a weekly basis and other than a mild std from time to time at least I'm getting laid. You guys really should join me.

I'm getting a haircut for the first time in years
I've been growing it out for quite a while now
I'm a litte afraid of what's coming :((

Dude that's not good, you need to be around people that like you, not you+alcohol. I say that as an older guy who fell into the same rut in my high school and college days. It's not a path you want to go down.

It might come out pretty good

workout was pretty bad, first time I failed on every single exercise. it's ok, I'll get them next time

met up with my ex at a party last week
she left me for being a weed smoking hippy at the age of 21
I have since quit smoking weed and gotten my life together and shit
her current BF is a 28 yo hippy stoner
Can't say if I'm happy that I dodged that bullet or not

>Did I mention I am so socially deprevied, I walk around the house talking to myself like I'm talking to someone? I imagine actual conversations with people...
I've done this my whole life. usually something that allows me to monologue, I'd imagine myself talking to a therapist a lot, or explaining a technical subject to an audience or whatever. (the therapist one in particular would get really meta a lot, like I'd realize I was doing this then start imagining explaining to the therapist that I imagine explaining to the...) at one point it got to where I was carrying on these monologues in public, mumbling aloud, and I had to start stopping myself from doing it worried people would think I was insane

idk if it's a symptom of social isolation tho, I've gone through periods where I had no one and periods where I went out every night, but I never really stopped doing it. it's relaxing, like writing a long forum post

Leaving for my workout in 30 minutes.

No plans...

Going crazy over this girl who is in 2 of my uni classes, but I recently discovered her Instagram and believe she has a boyfriend.

>How was your workout today?

Just did a lot of light calisthenics and hypertrophy leg stuff, now my lower body is rigid as fuck.

>Got any plans for the weekend?

Playing D&D with my friends.

>Got any feels to get off your chest?

I'm joining the coast guard soon and I'm nervous for the physical tests even though I can blow them away.

I don't get it guys, why do we NEED to socialize? Why do we go crazy if we don't? Why the fuck does it have to be this way?

kys

>How was your workout today?

Didnt have time for gym today, day was packed, so I just did some pull ups.

>Got any plans for the weekend?

No, just my uncle birthday tomorrow, and nothing else :/

>Got any feels to get off your chest?

I have been feeling weird around people lately, its like the larger the group the weirder I feel, like I am the outcast who isnt funny, and cant pick up a girl unless I am drunk enough to have confidence, maybe I am just too anxious; so I will try to learn to meditate.

Spent 4 hours fapping to sissy porn.

Was no fap all week because I'm fucking my GF all night tomorrow but I blew it.

Fuck

>just went to the drive through at dunkin donuts for coffee
>see sexy latina with huge ass in spandex get out of car to go to window to get something the lady forgot to give her
>she's mirin
>too autistic and pussy to say anything
>she grabs her bag and walks off and says "goodnight light eyes" (my eyes are bright blue)
>literally mumble too myself "y-you too"
>drive home crying and don't even drink the fucking coffee
why am i so pathetic?

>it's literally 5.13AM where I live
I have become wojak

Hey Veeky Forums new tinder match with qt high test lifter gril is off to a good start, how do I not fuck this one up? She didn't give me much to work off of

People who complain about "break-ups" are fucking pussies imho

You don't know true mental anguish, if that is any consolation.

say
>look, i'm gonna be straight up with you, i'm just looking to hook up and let's not kid ourselves, we know what this apps for. Now ,here's the deal, i like you and i want you. Now we can do this the easy way or the hard way.
Your move.

Good work user. Just remember, when you feel the urge to relapse tell yourself "No", and think of the despair feeling you get after fapping. You can do this.

the right direction, but too much text
same shit, but shorter

Proud of you, user.

I went to my girlfriend's house this morning instead of going to work. We fucked for hours and watched a movie.

Gonna have to tell my wife I want a divorce.

She cheated on me several times and we haven't split yet. Some shit happened when I was trying to separate us a couple years ago and we stayed together for the family and kids. But I'm not happy when she's around. I hate fucking her even though she fucks like a pornstar and wants it every day. She shit on my heart.

Y-you guys really think I should be that forward right off the bat?

Playing d&d with the lads rn. Got a date with a qt Latina tomorrow, but I have a sore throat and mucus rn. About to go buy NyQuil and Advil rn, what else can I do to prevent a cold?

yea because she's just a bitch, press send. Worse that happens is she doesn't reply or says no lol.