Veeky Forums careers thread

You don't hire an acting agency

>"not a place for fit brand fitness"
>literally worked a desk all day as a crypto POG

Dude you weren't hiking and spending weeks eating MREs in the field. There are plenty of POGS who live in the gym.

hopefully applying for pa school in January for fall admission

oh
well whatever i need a good safe ground before i sore to stardom and represent Veeky Forums in Hollywood

Just start doing the exercises, motherfucker.

FMF Corpsman. It's weird being fitter and autistic about fitness than most of the marines here. Most people just get complacent once they're in an live off of dominos and other barracks foods.

Definitely getting out after my contact is up. I'm currently blasting and cruising under my command's nose, but I want to be huge and strong, and that's pretty fucking difficult to do in the military unless you're a high speed SEAL guy or whatever.

I was referring to basic training, if I wasn't being clear enough. Even grunts can get swole on deployment after basic and AIT.

have a plan for getting out bud, whether it's school making use of that sweet GI Bill bennies and/or a job

I ran into a navy corpsman a few weeks ago. Talked a lot of freedom shit, running and gunning like he was in a marine company. Dude's been assigned to the hospital the entire time. I chuckled

I have a couple ideas. Like getting a headstart on my nursing degree, work for my mom and step dad's outfitting business, etc

Fucking lol, blueside docs are the biggest mo-tards of all. Next time you see him just laugh in his face, he's probably the "vital signs" PO.

Greenside isn't as glamorous as everyone makes it out to be. I wouldn't mind working a POG ass job and being able to focus soly on diet and gains-making tbqh

How about acting school dipshit

Currently in the Coast Guard as a non rate. Really sucks not being able to consistently go to the gym due to getting underway. Kills my motivation to lift even when I'm in port. Can't wait to get into my rate so I won't have to ever get underway again.

Wait....does bootcamp really mess up all of your gains? I will be heading to a 1 month bootcamp for reserves.

>does bootcamp really mess up all of your gains
yes

yeah but then i'll be making pennies
i want to be middle class before acting and then i'll be uber rich as an actor
plus parents and stuff

How's the coastie life? I was thinking about putting in a package for a SAR Tech for the navy from regular corpsman, but I don't want to get off my blast and cruise for selection just yet lol

I mean, I had a bit of respect since he's been at Reed / Bethesda. But, fuck man, don't be talking hard charging jihad killer when you haven't even volunteered to go to be a line medic over in the stan.

1. Do calisthenics every day
2. Run every other day until you can run every day
3. Gradually increase distance

Repeat ad nauseam

Yep. I was primed to be in the best shape of my life this summer. Found out I was going to boot camp in May so I said screw it and went on a month long bender. Boot camp is for fatties to get into semi acceptable shape. Anybody who is Veeky Forums will lose A LOT of fitness. I think my 1.5mile increased by over 2 minutes and my max pullups went down by 8. Pushups were the only thing that stayed the same. The company commanders kept saying things along the lines of "This is probably the best shape you've ever been in" and all I could do was roll my eyes. Boot camp is a fucking joke and a waste of time.

I'm enlisting in the Marines in October. I currently match all the physical requirements except for the mile time, but I'm just a week away form hitting that. I'm sure there's also a waiting period between when I enlist and when they test me, yeah? So that's even more time. When should I expect to be sent off to bootcamp? And does it matter where in the US I live if they sent me to one camp or the other, or is it just what's more convenient for them?

One thing that's available now compared to when I got out is the online classes. The bullshit pre-reqs that I had to sit in-class with the rest of the 18/19yr old civ degenerates.

Look if the CC in your state has psych101, sociology101, english101, genetics, ethics, medical terminology for online. Shit is cake and should transfer to the big school house. Would have saved a bit of time

I think I would like to escape my shitty desk career and go to OCS. I had a good gpa and no criminal record and I'm confident I could be fit enough in like a year.

I just think I'd probably be too socially inept to be a leader of men. But I'd like to overcome that through trial. I'll see what I think in 2-3 years.

Start running 3-5 miles. Don't want to be the slow guy. Doesn't matter the location, you're going to hate life regardless and question why the fuck you ever signed up. But it will be easy and done with it soon enough.

About to join USMC... waiting for my MEPS documentation to come through. I'm freaking the FUCK out I want to join already. 22 btw

Gonna go Infantry, and then hopefully go recon. Rah
>pic related 5"8 135

I'll definitely look into it, thanks my dude. Have a nam on me

Don't wait, start inquiring about it now. You will become a leader, whether a good one or not, is entirely up to you

You could enlist and later apply for OCS after serving for a few years. It may build your confidence by easing you into a position of leadership within the military.

Enlisted men will respect you a tad more for your prior service, at the very least.

>then gonna go recon
Boy you better like nearly drowning in water and ruck running 50+lbs in uniform and boots. You're gonna need a strong back and durable legs.

Best of luck to you. Just remember why you joined and don't let the saltiness consume you too much

Routine and training history?

This has to be a fucking joke

>That's not how MEPS works
>Not getting a recon contract

You'll do great. Just keep your head down and SHUT THE FUCK UP. STOP WHINING AND GET MOTIVATED SHITSTAIN.

I'm a police officer but there's really no fitness involved after the academy. I'm shipping to basic for the National Guard in a month, maybe that will give me the incentive I'm looking for to be fit.

Just go for it man. I can tell my Captain kind of gets nervous when speaking in front of all of us, but we all still respect him and he is a good leader. As long as your a good person and genuinely care about the people you are leading you will be fine and people will like you. If you think you'll be ready in a year go for it then. No need to put it off for another 2-3 years.

Nice what was your day to life like? In a sound proof room listening to terrorists talk? What language did you study? And how long was your school for? I'd imagine you had a pretty juicy enlistment bonus.. like 40,000 usd? What were your hours like also 9-5? Thanks.

Pretty sure if you're East of the Mississippi you get sent to Parris Island, West you get sent to San Diego.

>then hopefully go recon

How are you going to train for that?

>You could enlist and later apply for OCS

You could, but you really shouldn't. Recruits will tell you the same thing, they literally just want to weed out people that are willing to enlist instead in hopes that they'll just do that and then they have you.

Hell, they tell you you're eligable to apply after a single year of service, but they'll laugh at you when you do. Who cares if some chucklefuck "respects" you more maybe sometime down the line.

You have no idea the amount of shit we gave to "specialists" that enlisted when they could have been officers. And it wasn't just the enlisted that did it. The officers fucking shit on them too.

Med student. Having a good time but I actually like this shit, the kids here because their parents pushed them to be here are not so happy.

>In a sound proof room listening to terrorists talk?
A lot of this, but I also got the opportunity to ruck it with the infantry on several occasions (the most memorable moments of my Army career were spent shooting the shit with grunts). I studied Korean; I was trapped at the DLI for several months with my nose in books, watching a significant portion of my class wash out from lack of study discipline/motivation. I honestly felt like a secret agent from time to time. I teach high school English now, but I've already applied to several linguistics PhD programs in the hopes of becoming a professional linguist.

Pretty good. I got put in Hawaii on a patrol boat so I got kind of lucky, but if you have no dependents I think you have a decent chance of getting stationed there out of boot camp if you want to be. Crew is really chill and everyone I've met so far is really laid back and friendly (Including Rear Admirals and Master/Senior Chiefs). Just kind of tired of getting bounced around as a non rate. My situation is a lot different than most. I'm going to be at 4 different units within my first 4 months of being in. Just can't wait to settle down in one place for at least a year as I wait for my A-School so I'm not always the new guy. Can't speak of how CG is compared to other branches because I didn't do much research before I joined. All I know is a lot of people switch from other branches to CG, but not the other way around. Nobody I've met has hated their experience in the CG and wanted out. Some are ready to be out after 4 years, but they still enjoyed it.

RN here. I hate life and wish I could have been pampered by parents to the point of letting me enter med school on their dime. Fuck, I was a pump and dump by some asshole in my idiot mother who's long dead. And now I have to hold the hand of some of those children on the path to becoming Doctors.

At my place we deal with local students on rotations constantly. The MD I'm under is a proctor for a college so he always takes them in. Last rotation I had this one girl have a break down, crying to on the shoulder of another RN here that her credit card limit wasn't extended another 10k, but all of her classmate's got their card extended, for their rotation in Italy.

Bitch doesn't have a fucking job and she's crying because she can't get another 10k to spend in a single month, but other people were able to do so. After she finished crying, we overheard her calling her dad asking for another 10 grand for a trip.

I really shouldn't have become a nurse. I brought this all on myself.

Anyone in the Canadian Armed Forces (army)? If so, can you tell me what the process was like to get in, and what my chances of becoming an infantry, artillery, or armoured soldier are as an NCM with just shitty HS education?

Don't do it. Do anything else. This country is fucked and our military is shit

> what my chances of becoming an infantry, artillery, or armoured soldier are
If you have a body, and a hand to sign your name with, you can do any of those jobs.

I first learned to swim at Fordham University so I am a pretty strong swimmer, although I know Recon is SERIOUS business so common sense dictates I'll have to be a hell of a lot better. I ruck a lot 6 miles ruck with 40 pounds gradually trying to up the weight. Thank you for the luck I'm going to need it.
Started off in fitness (seriously) with Muay Thai 4 years ago. Best thing I ever did.
Routine:
Mon- Chest + Triceps +Abs
Tues: Legs + Abs (either sprints with pylometrics, calisthenics, or lifting)
Wed: Back + Biceps + Abs
Thurs: Legs (depends on what I did on Tues)
Fri: Chest + Shoulders + Abs
Sat: Back + Biceps + Abs
Sun: Rest might take 2 days rest depending on how body feels.

How long should I expect to wait between when I go to the office to enlist and when I get sent off to camp?

I know how MEPS works, I'm just waiting on the MEPS doctor to confirm me for the physical examination which I'm sure I'll pass. Should take a couple days. I don't want to take the risk of failing Recon and being a fucking Food specialist.
AYE AYE SIR! I'm 22 with no college degree so I'm fucking HUNGRY to do something honorable with my life.
Probably more rucking and swimming.

Volunteer for ice breaker duty

>and our military is shit
How, examples?

Yeah, but I'd like to know the nuances of the enlisting process so my chances are increased

That sucks

Oh shit user, was actually thinking about nursing school as a premed major (I live in Australia). Do other nurses hate their job as well?

>nuances of the enlisting process
You know, there are kids who show up and tell their recruiter that they -and I quote- "want to kill people". These pleasant folks are chosen to become either infantrymen or cooks.

Public Transport security response team

That's what I'm hoping to get for my next permanent duty station. Put in for the district that has all the ice breakers, but still waiting to get my orders

I work as a cashier at a supermarket :)

Ohhh boi I know that feel, user. Do you have an eventual escape plan in mind?

>i am a hell of a lot fitter.
>Knees and back are like styrofoam though.

Yeah sounds great man, I've been looking for ways to lose mass and yet gain the knee and back problems of a elderly fat guy.

Sounds like you've got the swim down. Bump your ruck up to 10-15. Run between 5 to 10.

Learn ahead of time, like now, your knots, using a compass, reading a map (orienting, terrain, etc), taking care of your feet so that you can help the other retards with theirs cause they didn't change their socks. it'll be helpful so you don't go into it totally unprepared

and pull-ups

good luck and don't quit and for fuck sakes don't become a heat casualty

kek

months? definitely not the end of the week. it all depends on the quota for the fiscal term

Thanks a lot for your advice. Do you have any websites that have general advice to help me out with the information ahead of time?

I want to believe this is true. Fuck, I just can't be a NEET, leeching off of my parents would be disgusting. I'm only worried about getting and fucking up in basic; don't care if I get killed during duty. I just want someone who's been in the forces to tell me what the process is like.

Locksmith. I still haven't launched my business yet as building up funds, but during the wait I decided to get Veeky Forums.

That way if I have to carry a heavy toolkit or a door half a mile or more from my van I'll be able to do it without looking like a sweaty sack of shit. It's all manual labor too, for the most part, with lots of keeping your arms above shoulder height while holding shit steady, so there is that too.

I'm also sort of dreaming that, wearing a tight t-shirt and working, the occasional single of thirsty female client might offer to pay me in kind. I think those days I might 'never have made it to the job' and list the used stock as lost. I doubt it'll happen much, if it happens at all, but a man can dream.

youtube and google

you might get lucky at an REI or other such outdoor store that has "classes" or ask the associate who "might" know how to use a compass. pretty much which way is north man. then turn the map that direction too. how to plot coordinates and such.

they'll teach you this shit but it will only help you being familiar before going into it

> he joined the army thinking it was going to be any different

You poor bastard

how hard is it to pick a residential/home lock?

Cell jockey at a research hospital.

Thank yall for your service. Personally I would probably kill myself before submitting to set eating and sleeping schedules

ER doc. Shit is great besides the drug abusers trying to score and other undesirables.

Maybe fit but not like Veeky Forums thinks it, remember the military (especially if you're infantry or a combat role) is mostly about endurance, strength is important without a doubt but you're gonna want to do more endurance training than anything else.

The grunts I worked with (I was an Amtracker) would push to their bodies to the absolute limits, especially on deployment where there was no room for error, unfortunately for me I also had to do it because my platoon ended up doing a lot of grunt shit because budget cuts.

Depends. Can be teriffyingly easy or a pain in the ass, and it isn't even down to the type of neighborhood or money spent either. I'm obviously not going to go any deeper than that on a fucking user board.

Often times a callout will just be because someone has lost some keys. I had some interesting little adventures in my training though. One one sliding door the owner, on not being able to open it, had basically gutted the inner workings of the lock with a screwdriver. Even after emptying it out we couldn't get it open which made no sense. Only after an hour of antics did we discover a little push-in bar in the bottom wall-side of the door someone had pressed in. That was all it was. A light tug with your fingers, and open. Fixing customer fuckups and dealing unknowns is more than half the job.

>mfw trash pickup guy

I'm thinking of joining the legion. I'm fit, lonely, poor and stuck in bumfuck no where. It seems preferable to standard enlistment due to the language immersion aspect. I'm also a music major so i might try to get in their band. I'm probably just a faggot wannabe. i also considered the navy as i am a lifegaurd and would be interested in becoming a rescue swimmer.

The process is like this. You'll go in and see what jobs are available. They'll test you on basic things like math, reading and word comprehension. Then they'll take those scores and line them up with what jobs you could have. Then you'll come back a day or so later and say you want A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,....etc jobs from that list.

Your recruiter wants you to pick as many as possible. Then they'll make you pick a general vocation which means not only could you get any of those roles, but you could also get any role in one of four different vocations (which contains about 30 other jobs too).

Truth is, you don't need to pick a general vocation. Or apply for more than 1job, but your recruiter will likely not give a shit about keeping your around for that one job. It's their position to get you into any role ASAP and not give a fuck about what you want. If you test high, you'll of course get better standing in getting what role you want. But it's on as needed basis.

If you want in, just put a general vocation and fuck out of the office. The recruiter will have you a position by the end of the day. If you want a specific job, and you should, it could be a month or so until it's set and then you'll look into basic and then heading out to that school for training for your role.

When all is said and done, your role could still change. If it's not in writing, nobody gives a fuck. If it is in writing, it'll be corrected in two years. And different jobs can be handed out at basic too.

You always have the ability to walk away. Don't sign anything. Don't believe anything along the lines of "you can do this in a year or so" or "you can apply later on" you can, but it won't happen. Their "it all depends on you" is horseshit. If a recruiter won't speak to you or won't help you with the job you want, don't speak to them. Find another one. Call their god damn 800#. Those assholes on the phone line actually outrank them too.

This. Don't fall for the horseshit about people respecting prior-enlisted officers more. Firstly, nobody cares. Secondly, you're risking getting stuck as an enlisted soldier if things don't work out. After a few years of service when you're an 03 sitting pretty with all the perks, you'll thank me.

Thank you. I'm assuming you've served, What'd you do?

how old is too old to join the military?

i've come to realize that i don't care about money and (external) accomplishment, but only the discipline and mastery of the mind. i think joining the military could help me with this but i have no interest in anything other than the functional skills they could teach me

other than that, i like reading, i like fitness
how old is too old to join?
are there other places where i could go for these things without signing myself over for a few years?

Math and used Veeky Forums.

so always go for exactly what you want with no hesitation

After what I've been told, I'm not surprised. Thanks for the info

I made the mistake of enlisting and 6 months into the enlisting process I am regretting it.

Idk what to do with my life

I dropped out of school to enlist so I'm fucked there too

I want to give up

Sounds like you need to get to the west coast my friend. I'm at one of the highest ranked med schools out here and the culture is very blue collar. Nobody bitches or moans about anything, it's collegial as fuck and we love our intermediate care providers.

Seriously though go work in an academic medical center on the west coast, or even the midwest. Entirely different culture than the shit ranked Jewish American Princess/Beta Rich boy MD factories that are condensed on the west coast.

And we're all smarter.

All the nurses I know are beasts who know their shit and love their job. They're really cool to med students as long as we're not these incompetent emotional wrecks i've heard about.

Warranty testing center. Full benies, lax hours, basically tear parts apart and figure out why they broke. After years of working shit 0 hour contract jobs this feels good man

Why do you regret it and what country?

UK. I regret it because after doing 8 months of research my romantic image of the armed forces has drained away and I've come to realise it isn't an alternative, adventurous route in life.

it's work. Its normal work. Its a 9-5 job except the water you drink is spiked with bromide to keep your sex drive down, and you life under a strict military regime

Its just work

It was so heavily romanticized to me and I was too stupid to realise

I worked with a guy going into the Marines that said between seeing the recruiter and taking the oath took two weeks, but he's not headed to boot camp until next year. He still has a year of school left so for all I know, he could have been shipped out even sooner.

Sorry to hear it bro, I'm a bong too, and nearly did the same with the poilce.

That said, from knowing a lad in the Navy and having him on facebook, that's pretty much a life of adventure (even if I'm sure there is plenty of work involved too). He seems to spend half his life on shore leave drinking and clubbing in locations around the world.

If you ever get the oppertunity to drop out and that way, it might be worth a look. From what I see of him you will genuinely get to see the world and you are still doing good. There is a lot of shady homo shit though. Some of the stories he's told. Sounds like Navy showers are second only to US prison showers.

again.
From what I understand the fitness tests are a piece of piss in the Navy too.

Interesting. I'm right at the end of the application process and in theory can change if I want to.

I'll consider it. I really have no where else to go I guess.