>hey guys I'm God, a magical entity that has existed forever in nothingness for eternity
>basically I got bored one day and decided I wanted to create literally all of reality. I did in it a week, which seems pretty arbitrary since I'm all-powerful and thus could've done it instantly, but moving on...
>basically I created this race, humanity in my image. I made this guy called Adam and plopped him in the paradise Eden with all the animals
>but he couldn't fuck the animals, so I ripped out his rib cage and made the first woman out of him
>they fucked lol and I told them to do whatever the fuck they wanted except eat from the Tree of Knowledge (yes knowledge is bad mmmkay)
>Like a stupid dumb bitch that she is, the woman Eve spoke with a literal fucking snake who told her to eat the apple and the absolute MADWOMAN did
>she made Adam eat it too and they fucked again over their depravity so I kicked them out of the Garden to create the human race
>basically they fucked and made three sons which somehow populated the entire human race (4 guys + 1 woman = Millions of humans) until one day I said fuck it and flooded the Earth 4thelulz
>this guy, Noah, put the billions of species of animal onboard is ship and I PROMISED him that I wouldn't wipe out the human race anymore (heheheh)
>I also got really pissed at some faggots for building a big tower so I created multicultural languages as a punishment
>Eventually I got bored one day and fucked some brought called Mary. She claimed she was a virgin, but she really wasn't. She gave birth to my son who was also me, Jesus Christ.
>I sent my son, who is also me, down to spread the good news about how rich people are evil and the poor are good (lmao tell that to my fans today)
>Eventually I told my son (who is also me), to kill himself for the sins of others and the absolute MADMAN did it
>He came back to Heaven to join me (who is also me) to watch over humans
Hey guys I'm God, a magical entity that has existed forever in nothingness for eternity
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>It's another atheist misunderstands genesis episode
>Doesn't give humanity knowledge
>Expects them to know right from wrong and not eat the fruit
Somebody all knowing should've been able to see the flaw in that lack of logic.
>Basically my whole plan was that humans can do whatever the fuck they want, as long as before they die they say they believe in me and ask for forgiveness, and then they can spend eternity in paradise with me
>And if those evil fedora tippers DON'T believe in me, well I don't care if they're good as mother FUCKING teresa they're gonna burn in Hell for eternity, getting raped by demons
>But don't worry guys, I love all of you! Just don't be a heretic :^)
>Guys you can't enjoy earthly pleasures that's sinful and you'll suffer in the after life if you do
>You need to trust the word of man that that's the case because analogies meant for 2,000 year old sand kikes are totally applicable to modern day and I don't need to revise anything
>Also all those urges of wanting to do anything that looks or even is nice is actually my pall Satan who I ordered to make you want to do nice things that are actually sinful because I want to fuck you ov-- I mean TEST you
>sand kikes
AND THERE IT IS FRIENDS
THE UGLY, TRUTH
WE ARE BUT CHILDREN OF BAIT
AND OP IS THE TRUE GOD OF BAIT!
>believing any abrahamic bullshit that is a total ripoff of zoraastrism that is a ripoff of the vedas
Not an argument my child
Now pray for me or have a melon shoved up your ass in Not-Tartarus
>conflating God with the Christian God
>tfw so butt hurt you lost an argument in another thread you start a new thread
This board is overflowing with insecure smallbrains
It's hilarious I love it
Bad thread and you should feel bad
this is so fucking sad goddamn
>God
>has existed
Aquinas would like a word with you.
Stop bumping shitty threads faggots
[spoiler]bump[/spoiler]
>its another Christian pretends he understands something in the bible by wiggling his fingers while making ghost noises.
That's not even true. I'd call you a fedora tipper. If all you had to do to be saved was acknowledge God's position in your last moments that would be one thing but actually the requirements for salvation are abiguous and complicated no matter what various sectarians will say (by virtue of the fact they are all saying different things in the first place). Many baptists even like to say those who do works will be damned just as a matter of not trusting that Jesus is an excuse to sit on your ass and do nothing.
So you're saying that a person who lives his life well, doesn't extraordinarily hurt anyone, maybe is even a little generous at times, deserves to rot in Hell for eternity just because he wasn't adequately convinced enough to believe in God?
embarrassing
No, I'm saying the very idea of that is so odious it blocked and will continue to block my path as a potential Christian convert. So pretty much the exact opposite of your contention.
Imagine actually believing this.