Going to jail pretty soon

Going to jail pretty soon.
As far as jail goes its as soft as baby shit, but so is my midsection.
Give me some good bodyweight routines i can start now and continue on the inside pretty please with sugar etc.
Also before you mention it you can stuff the sticky up your stinker cuz i aint reading no fucking novel.

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=UTbRcZYlb2Q
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

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Variations of dips and pushups, all day errday. My brother was in the can for several months, and came out looking better than ever by just doing BW.

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Solitary Fitness by Charles Bronson

And whatever the fuck you can manage.
But if you are in a babby-prison, you are likely to have access to weights.

why are you even going to jail in the first place

How are you posting online if you're going to jail soon?

Also, this Never read it, but if a guy can be that size at 64 despite being in solitary for most of his adult life, living on shitty prison food and no access to a gym or steroids, then it must fucking work.

CAPTCHA - A sign saying "Police Deliveries" No fucking way.

What for? Race?

I'm betting white.

Felony assault
I broke a guys face at the bar.
Im out on bail awaiting sentencing.

So how old was the child you raped?

Yes, white. 31. Middle class upbringing.
A little college. Pot grower. Cash rich but poor on paper, also known as "hill rich" where i come from.

what'd you break his face for

>Felony assault
>I broke a guys face at the bar.
No way you didn't have a record before.
Nobody goes to jail for drunkenly beating a guy down once.

nigger

Cant remember
They originally wanted state prison.
Breaking bones or causing wounds requiring stitches is a seperate charge. So it was 2 violent felonies talked down to one misdemeanor.

Do your standard shit. Hardest part is the motivation.

How long are you staying

youtube.com/watch?v=UTbRcZYlb2Q

wut
you're going to jail for a misdemeanor?

But if you've been found guilty and are awaiting sentencing, why are you not on remand, especially given its a violent crime?

I don't get the US justice system.

We wont know until sentencing but my lawyer tells me to expect 3-6 months after half time.

Because money

Don’t they have weights in prison

>misdemeanor
>jail time

Its what they call a "wobbler" its charged and i plead guilty to a felony but get it reduced to a misdemeanor at sentencing. If the judge agrees to it that is. If i had priors i would be going to prison for sure.

Wait, so you can literally pay to not go to jail in the US? Why not pay to get off all together then?

Given this guy has been found guilty and KNOWS he's going down, why not cross the border into Mexico and live it up in South America for a few years?

Also, this

Ah right, that answers my question in , so you might not go to jail.

Your post might be typical sacred shit-talkin, but you do sound like the sort of asshole who is suited to being in and out of prison all your life.

Its called bail. You can pay to get out of jail while you are waitting for a court date.
If your case stretches out for a year and you are too broke to afford bail then you stay in jail for that time.
If you pay bail and are convicted you can argue that you are not a flight risk and remain out of custody until a predetermined turn in date.

Its not impossible that i will stay out of jail for this just very very improbable
And i would disagree with your assesment. I got drunk and made a mistake, can you say you've never done the same? Maybe not as sserious of a mistake but the principle is the same.

Not the guy you replied to, but you are not supposed to get out of control. If you won't hit someone sober, then doing this while intoxicated actually just says a lot about your 'habits' and how you don't control them, but they control you. So don't feed us bullshit 'people do stupid shit when drunk', yep, the retards do this, but they would probably do this sober just less frequently.

Are you the texan that bit a guys nose off?

Are you a man?
No

and are you a human? are you conscious being? or just an animal acting on its urges?

Free weights were taken out of the prison system decades ago. Too easy for people to use them as weapons. What I've heard is they use machines only and dumbbell only, no barbells, and the dumbbells are all welded together and padded so to make them harder to use as a weapon.

Thats ridiculous.
People take actions based on hightened emotional states or intoxication all the time. Commonly when this happens a person will say they were "not in control" or "emotion took over". You are talking like the difference between beast and man is the same as human to vulcan or some shit.

untermensch take actions based on hightened emotional states or intoxication all the time*

ftfy

So?

Use machine and dumbells. Way better than nothing.

Not OP, but not everyone is a buddhist monk or even have a strong willpower. Hell, he could just be some sort of autistic.

I've never broke a guy's bones while drunk, no.
Think about all the money he's spending, all the pain for several months of healing, and possibly complications later.
DESU you're getting off easy with anything less than 3 years.

I dont remember what happened.
What if it was self defense?
Also what good does jailtime do?
Revitisism rate is over 75% that suggests that being incarcerated rarely stops people from commiting crimes.

If it was self defense wouldn't some of the witnesses said so?
Jailtime punishes your stupid self for ruining someone's life or at least 3 months of healing. What bone did you break? I'd be fine with no jail time if that guy got to break that bone of yours too and you paid all his medical bills.

Nobody witnessed how the fight started. The other party refused to testify.
He had a broken eye socket and nose.
Very delicate bones im told.

Yes, but among my friends there isn't a single person, who got to jail, so I guess you can drink booze, snort coke and somehow not get there. Probably, because we aren't short tempered and can actually have at least some control over life. Also, I was taught the difference between a kid and a man is that a man anticipates what might happen. I, for one, told my ex, that if I find her in flagranti, I will just kill her and the guy. That is a matter of calculation, not my emotions, because I fucking know, what would happen then. Fortunately, she didn't cheat, so I didn't have to kill her.
And as for using extreme adjectives, e.g. never, everyone etc. it is impossible in the world of logic. If you find at least one counter-argument, something that isn't 'always', than it turns to almost always and your argument becomes invalid.

>larping this hard
kek

I was always wondering, how comes that 4chin lures people, who love assumptions. On /b/ everyone will tell you are virgin, even if you aren't. Here, everyone will tell you, that you lift for women even if you don't. So what the fuck is your problem? You negate the possibility of existence of people, who don't agree with you or are you just one of those 'special' right wingers, who think there is just one objective truth about life and you have it. Tell me, really, because I have been here since fucking 2010 and I cannot tell if it is the assumptions or something else.

You would murder someone for fucking your girlfreind and still try to claim some moral superiority? Are you tarded?

Hard to tell as I never was in that kind of situation. However, based on my experience and knowing myself for quite a few years, I would be able to say - yes, probably I would. And there is nothing like moral superiority or inferiority. My choices aren't better or worse than yours. I just prefer them over yours, also there are a lots of things I just don't accept, they might happen, but I won't tolerate them. So in my life-rulebook, you behave the same while intoxicated or else they control you, not the other way round. Another thing from my rulebook is that if you voluntarily agreed to a contract (in this case, we agreed to stay loyal to each other), you MUST willingly take a punishment for breaking said agreement. My ex knew it, I told her before we started dating, I don't accept cheating, I would much rather cut my cock off than betray, the same I expected from her, hence the 'threat' of taking her life. She agreed to our contract, so as long as she is perceived conscious human being she is bound to respect terms. I don't make agreements with my dog, that if he shits on the carpet I will kill him. He is just a dog, so I don't expect him to follow suuuuuch intricate notions like an agreement. In conclusion, you don't want to be treated like an animal, don't act like one.

The faggotry contained in this post is so potent it made my eyes hurt to read it.
Please sterilize yourself for the good of humanity.

Enjoy living your animal to the fullest. After all, what else is there for you? I mean except for eating, shitting, sleeping and fucking? Your life is pointless, you won't amount to anything, because you cannot even debate the simplest things. Either you don't understand them or you don't want to understand, which in both cases make you a genetic dead-end. Keep projecting, mah buddy...and the hopefully kill yourself. There are lots of suicidal twats on 4chin, hope you are one of them.

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>tfw even jails have been feminized with machines replacing free weights

Get Convict Conditioning. Google it.

you're a subhuman animal op. probably nonwhite. if you're white, have fun when you're reborn as sudra trash in your next life.

Some prisons have cables, most don't. The best you'll usually get is pull up bars and dip bars, but with a little improv I managed to recreate almost any lift with the exception of diddlys.

But OP is going to jail, not prison, and the vast majority of jails have absolutely nothing. You'll also eat next to nothing in terms of protein/calories in jail unless you have someone sending you a decent amount of money regularly.

holy shit I need source

Fuck off cunt

>shitty prison food meme

You can get extra food from the commissary. That's how those fools get so huge in prison. The whole "They're 240 pounds ripped while only eating 3 shitty meals a day" thing is a myth. You can eat like a king if you have a little money or a hustle.

Do americans actually go to prison for getting in a small fight?

lmao this can't be real

Depends on how much you fucked up the other guy