OPH in the squat rack

>OPH in the squat rack
>Gym watchtower shines spotlight on me

>no one in the gym watch tower
>door to the manlet pit has been broken down

>high on preworkout
>police walk in

>OPH
>have to squeeze it the other way to return it to normal

>last person didn't re-rack the communal squat plug

>The conveyer belt on the smith machine ground up another manlet today

>manlet king imposes 5% tax on all manlet pit gains
>organize a revolt among the manlets
>we make it to his castle
>king manlet is sitting on his chair
>challenge him to a duel, but before it starts pull out lifts I hid in my gym bag
>the extra 3'' allows me to defeat him
>become new manlet king
mfw

>accidentally step into the manlet pit
>charged with manslaughter x4

>his foot is only big enough to crush 12 manlets per step
Are you sure you don't belong in there?

>I forgot to tip the qt japanese receptionist

STOP KILLING US YOU FUCKING LANKLETS!
REEEEEEE

>Lifting, setting a new PR on the bench
>At the bottom the gym mage transmutes the weight to feathers
>It shoots up, then he transmutes it to gold and it falls and crushes me
>respawn at home 15 minutes from the gym
>Lanklets take all my drops before I get back

I hate the gym mage

When will they learn?

what can we learn? I can't help my genetic code

>Inattentive
>Made two creatine drinks instead of one and an instant coffee
>Hot water supercharges the creatine
>Rip off the door, punch hole in floor
>Nobody wants to walk the dinosaur

>Also I need to fix the now

>gym skeletons keep leaving their bronze weaponry and paltry sums of coins in the locker rooms

>sneak into the locker room and steal lanklet creatine
>their gains gone the king leads the manlet rebellion
>creatine enhanced manlet gains are enough to overpower lanklets
>lanklet cut off from the knees
>look at me
>I am the lanklet now

>Gym watchtower

Fearing others in the gym
Pathetic loser

>communal gains trough runs dry for first time in aeons
>gymquisition is called
>finds a dozen gallon bottles of cum in some skellies locker
>he has been stealing our communal gains to sell to the rival gymdom
>he panics and chugs them all before anyone can restrain him
>grows into a thicc behemoth in a matter of seconds
>everyone's penises explode from sheer animal magnetism of his new form
>some straight weirdo is the only one unaffected
>engages in epic 3 hour battle with thicchemoth
>finally lures him onto a treadmill
>turns it on
>the monster instantly revertes into his skelly form
fucking tuesdays

>forgot to get the button fixed
>cant activate my almonds

This is the most autistic forced meme that has ever donned the earth

gym rpg meme needs to die already

sounds like you need to work on your resistances

>hates gymrpg threads
>opens gymrpg thread
you only have yourself to blame, there are half a dozen threads of making-it humble bragging and heated discussions on whether you should internally rotate during laterals or how much protein you should it it that's more to your liking.

>hack my genes to be 6'0
>gym genepolice surprise test tomorrow

fuck off

>be head of anti-manlet security for a large national gympany
>working over-time, we start shipping a new biometric squat-plug tomorrow
>don't mind, crushing hard on qt3.14 trap working with me
>suddenly lunk alarms start blaring
>turbo-manlets swarming all over the place
>put dozens of them out of their misery
>qt calls for help on comms, cornered at the water-cooler
>the manlets might find the courage to approach her within the hour
>as I'm rounding the corner a riodlet grabs me and throws me trough a bunch of skellies
>their sharp features cut me up all over, bleeding profusely
>black out
>wake up in recovery gains tank
>beats surgically grafted to my skull
>layer over layer of nike compression gear on me
>reservoir in my chest delivers a steady stream of sips
>feel the tugging of the tightest man-bun ever conceived on the back of my head
>they turned me into a cybro
>I never asked for this

>saturday
>taking out new gf (pic related) to gym
>dickhead waiter puts us in the squat-rack next to the cardio-area
>bar is soggy
>weights too salty
>fuck it, squat anyways
>order dumbells for dessert
>they only have 25s
>recommended tip is 20% of gains
barely even got into mood for sex after shit night

>failed the squat plug cleanliness test
>receptionist asked me to hand it in
>asked how long it will take to clean it
>"it should be done by tomorrow"
>missed leg day again

>using an old-school squat plug
>not having an inflatable one surgically installed
confirmed for never making it

>OHP in the power rack
>Bench in the power rack
>Row in the power rack
>tfw no comfy power rack in my room to have kinky sex in

the original manlet pit greentext wasn't even that funny, it's a shame it has to be the variant of every dystopian gym thread now. Same with the rpg memes, some were funny, but Veeky Forums blew it completely out of proportion. I hate to say it, but these threads are largely inspired from /tv/ threads, the only difference being their content is consistently and refreshingly entertaining.

>Do my neck curls sprawled across the reception desk as soon as I walk in
>Receptionist lusts after neck gains and attempts to give me some neck
>Oblige her
>Finish neck curls then do six sets of shrugs and never go back

KeK wills it

your fucking place

>Penis inspection to get in
>usher handles my balls
>kicked out because they're too full

This is the thir time this happened this month, I had to bribe my falcon to fly me around town to another gym.

RIP Lahey

>MLM protest blocking the gym freeway
>miss my squat rack appointment, have to pay the cancellation fee

So he needs some... resistance training...?

BACK TO THE PIT

frig off randy

...

HE'S HERE
repeating digits confirm good fortune and braphogs come my way

Thats the fucking joke

>tfw I invented the manlet pit meme greentext and I didn't even respond to the thread after

>implying you did

You're addressing meme royalty user. Don't get funny with me.

kek

These are the only reason I come to this shitty board. Enjoy your r9k2.0

>Gym butler is off sick
>Have to rerack everything myself
>Chads and their catering staff laugh at me

...