Alright Veeky Forums, how do I make good coffee?

>soy milk

Fuck off

You're*

>Soy
Hah! Nigga you gay!

>soy milk
Enjoy your gyno

If you're using a french press

>Boil water then let it sit for 2 minutes to cool
>Pour water over coffee and stir it
>let it stop spinning and "bloom" for 30 seconds to release the carbon dioxide
>put the top on and let it brew for 4-5 minutes
>add a little milk or boiling water in your cup

Just playing by OPs rules as he said no sugar and actual milk has natural sugars in it.

>2-3 scoops

4 SCOOPS C'MON SON!

Step 1, buy good coffee. Step 2, buy pic related. Step 3 make coffee with no sugar or creamer, just black. Step 4, pour in bag (make sure it's clamped) and let it cool down to a tolerable temp. Step 5, lube the shit out of the end of the tube (if not prelubricated) then shove that tube down your butthole and unclamp. Or you can do it through an NG tube. But we know you're gay so, you'd prefer it through the other end.

are there grown men that actually have sugar in their coffee?

This thread is making me get out of bed and make coffee

You suck

>only 4 scoops
Guess who's staying back with humanity tonight user.

Yeah after using a V60 for a while I'm really starting to notice when beans no longer taste fresh

>Bye Scoobs.

Is filter coffee the way to go? Ideally I'd like to get a machine so I can make proper coffee with steamed milk etc because just having coffee water made with a french press (with or without milk) isn't that great in my experience, but that's also fairly expensive

Coffee reduces your ability to absorbs nutrients while it's in your gut.

You might aswell stop eating vegetables, you're not going to make it.

This is cheap and works very well imo

amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00005MF9C/ref=mp_s_a_1_8?ie=UTF8&qid=1508678491&sr=8-8&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_FMwebp_QL65&keywords=black+and+decker+coffee+maker&dpPl=1&dpID=410q3foLBkL&ref=plSrch&th=1&psc=1

Jokes on you

I drink coffee and don't eat veggies

Easy. French press. 10 grams of 205 degree water to each gram of coarse coffee. Stir and let sit for 4-5 minutes before plunging.

Might try this, thanks.

espresso machine
extract shot for 25-30 seconds (usually around 26)
try to froth milk quietly, without any huge bubbles appearing

americans make the worst coffee in the world
water down piece of shit passed through a wet sock
do the complete opposite of them for good coffee

No butter in my coffee, then?

>no sugar is hard mode
If you need sugar in your coffee then you don't like coffee. Drink it black, you fucking fairy.

first time I was over there and people putting cream in coffee like WTF
I had like 4 cups and felt nothing its so watered down

Oh wow! Thank you so much for this recipe, it's a real challenge to find recipes that will help me along my transition process, thanks!. Upvoted!

>Hard mode: no sugar.

>putting sugar in drinks ever

definitely not going to make it

If you have exactly 2 big nuts swinging between your legs here's how you should be making your coffee.

>take beans
>take a good whiff, feel your cock rise
>put in grinder, grind those bastards up
>pour your fresh grind into stainless steel filter
>place filter on mug, pour in hot water

Seriously just drink black fresh grind you big faggot, shit tastes great.

>what is the point of this thread

This. I wait 5 minutes though, not 2.

Get these filters for easy clean-up

soyboy

5 minutes in the press, nigga what? If I left my current Lavazza in for more than a minute I get a brew so vile and acidic I can't taste anything for 2 hours.

>Drinking Lavazza

Spotted your problem lad.

>make good filter coffee
>add some some-skimmed-milk or full milk
>teaspoon of cannabutter

fucking GOAT post workout drink after a filling meal

Black is best. Sugar makes coffee take like ass.

i drink lavazza and i brew for 10 mins

The hario method or whatever works well, even really shitty coffee will taste a lot smoother

youtu.be/sM3cB0i6ZZU

>put instant coffee into mug
>pour boiling water in
>add in a bit of creme and butter

gross

>making your own coffee
>not going to tim hortons

L O N D O N ontario

Buy quality grounds and use the cold brew method, add nothing, quit being a little bitch

good coffee starts off with good beans, then those beans must be roasted properly, then those beans must be stored properly before you even purchase them, then YOU must store them properly and use them before they go bad, and you must have a coffee machine that you know how to use and doesn't have scaley build up inside of it. I prefer latttes. I've personally found it difficult to find good coffee beans to start out with, my favorite plain coffee is kona coffee, but thats super expensive because its only found on one island in hawaii. I usually make myself a nice whole milk lattte since its easier to find decent espresso and the milk helps even out any uneven-ness in the taste. plus I make grade A perfect foam thats quite pleasing
t. former barista and someone who still drinks daily

>extract shot for 25-30 seconds (usually around 26)
fyi each espresso machine is different and will also vary depending on the grind as well. giving a specific time is useless

a teaspoon of organic flavor syrup is only 15 cal and like 7g of sugar. its really not bad as long as you dont get pre-sugared shit from coffee places that put a 1/4 cup of flavoring in

Fuckin just buy some instant, couple tea spoons in a mug and pour on boiling water and be done with it.
Tastes fine. Seriously I bet if I blind taste tested half of all coffee aficionados they wouldn't be able to taste the difference.

It's just more consumerist bug man bluff acting like there's a fucking art to doing everything. Turning everything into some rustic, technical artisan craft like it makes you some cultured individual. Just fuckin drink instant and put your time and money to better use.

Step 1. Go to starbucks and buy it from them
There, now you don't have to spend time doing meaningless stuff when you can get it easier

Holy shit shut the fuck up.

I think you're in the wrong thread, newfriend
starbucks literally burns their coffee beans on purpose in the roasting process to give them a "unique" flavor, they are the biggest meme tier crap coffee there is. I think i'd rather go to 7-11 first

buy a pourover cone, get unbleached filters for it. get a decent quality dark roast, whole bean. grind the beans and put them in your pourover cone. boil water in a kettle and fill the pourover cone. bonus points if you stir the grinds while it drips.
french press coffee tastes weird because it’s unfiltered.

Even the best instant brand tastes horrible without milk and sugar. You don't actually need to buy expensive beans for a decent black coffee, but instant is trash.

You have 2 options OP: cold brew and turskish. For cold brew you get whatever grinded brand you like, basic stuff like Lavazza will do. For turkish get an arabica blend with cardamom, and make sure to get a decent crema.

Whatever works for them clearly works. You think everyone who buys their coffee is wrong? Or maybe it's just you, the one person who doesn't like it

Lmao this fucking fags talking about french press and "hawaiian" bean selection and shit. Coffee ist just cheap pre workout.

I actually used to work for them, which is why I know they burn their beans. They're successful because they know how to work their brand, not because they have good coffee. things like the shiny "gold member" cards made people feel like they were VIPs in some "cool kids" club. Also things like expanding into breakfast sandwhiches and pre-made lunches attracted a lot of people, again all of which has nothing to do with actual coffee. when you work there one of the first things they tell you is "we're in the people business, not the coffee business"; by their own accord they're not in it because of/for the coffee

its sad you dont have decent tastes, but there's no need to come into a thread and try to take it out on everyone else. if you dont have tastes for coffee, you shouldn't have come to this thread. if you want to try to troll, go troll some fatties or something ffs, at least keep it Veeky Forums related

...

>grinder
>press
>solid beans

That's literally it

also side note, LOTS of people despise starbucks coffee and think its shit. just because people buy it, doesnt mean its good; look at how many wal-marts are out there. most people who go there go because the company has gone out of their way to make it the most convenient place to get coffee and a snack (ie. starbucks on every corner)

Butthurt much? I came to this thread trying to see if I could find a quick and easy way to make better tasting coffee. Ended up reading all sorts of fagotry

Damn, I was honestly just kinda joking around but you really deconstructed my whole argument. Nice lel

Buy a moka
fill the filter with coffe (around 2 spoons). DO NOT PRESS IT.
add water at the base (it should just reach the valve)
put it on fire (keep the fire really low)
as soon as the coffee starts coming out, open the lid and turn off the fire
drink it, it's high quality espresso and doesn't need sugar

yeah, I hate starbucks as a company and tend to take it personal with them.

Best 30 bucks I ever spent.

Wat dis is?

Unironically just drink it black. All you want out of the coffee is the caffeine and something warm to drink in the morning.

>the taste of a beverage defines your masculinity
I sure hope you're eating raw eggs and unseasoned meat too, pussy.

'decent tastes'

lol come the fuck off it. You know as well as anyone that you can hardly fucking taste the difference. You make coffee the way you do because you think it makes you cultured or more sophisticated not because of a genuine preference or appreciation or 'decent taste'.

I bet you fucking shave with a straight razor too. That is if you shave at all and don't rock the neckbeard, balding soy boi combo.

Wrong. Instant tastes just damn fine black.

who the fuck puts sugar in coffee? Americans never seize to amaze me.

Get cup
Put capsule in machine
Click button

You've never seen anyone, ever, drinking coffee with sugar? Do you ever see the daylight?

not in real life, in television maybe. you've never seen anyone put salt in their coffee? or black pepper? do you ever leave the house?

Wouldn't the temp of the coffee degrade the THC?

This. Makes the coffee a bit more "oily" and tastes great. Pro tip: add a pinch of salt to ease the bitter

A bit of soy milk won't turn you into a woman you insufferable retards.

>put instant coffee into mug
>add boiling water
>stir
>drink

The smart choice.

This user sounds like a faggot, but he's right about bean storage. If it's pre ground, it's already stale.

this

same goes for audiophiles music

the virgin coffee
the chad green tea

>former barista
>still drink daily

Why the fuck would you put sugar in coffee?
I don't even understand why people have milk in it.

Drink it black, embrace the bitterness.
If you want really good black coffee, get whole beans then ground them yourself before brewing.

>Not eating raw coffee beans

You a fucking pussy?

Just drink it black, it starts tasting good after a while.

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I have done the blind taste test thing and instant is not good. Can you people not taste things? This is like when people say diet soda is indistinguishable from regular.

>tfw bought a nice espresso machine
>americanos for days

it even grinds the beans and everything

Keep on fighting the good fight

Went on a trip to Belgium over the summer and sugar was one of the common things offered with coffee there

>go to wawa
>pick 24oz cup
>get hot pumpkin spice w/e for $1
>mfw

Underrated