What keeps you from ending it, Veeky Forums?

My quest for an honest mutual relationship...I have never experienced love or heartbreak.

C-chris chan?

>Man, you should find help.
I am saving up for plastic surgery. I'm almost certain it won't help though, which is why I have the pistol as backup.

My hate towards life is much stronger than my existencial crisis. I'll fight to the very end.

I have found new meaning and have started waking up again for months now

New plan incoming, and life is going in a better direction

>Work problems?
>Who gives a shit, I'm getting my shit together

My dream to buy well supplied van and just hit the road until I get into old age and then I off myself.

The gym, anime, and my desire to be challenge myself

fpbp

this as soon as my life will get boring i'll off myself

>I don't have a gun
If I procured a "home defense" firearm I would probably end up killing myself within the month. But killing yourself any other way is fucking stupid painful and you're a lot less likely to die(except maybe certain things to overdose on)

>Things could get better
I've made a lot of fucked up mistakes, and working to change myself, like through lifting, quitting drugs etc. has kept me from being idle and instead keeps me focused on my personal investment in this world. Be that as it may, I still think about killing myself to one extent or the other almost every day.

>I want to get fuckin joocy
Self explanatory.

>I have a cat
If I offed myself, whose toes would he bite at 3am?

Two words:
horse
pussy

...

My immense hatred for kikes

Kys kike boot licking nigger

delet this

gay sex with hats on

nothing
i tried twice now i'm just waiting for it to happen naturally

...

desu desu

Pls find help

Why would I nhero? I'm happy more often than I'm sad.

The overwhelming happiness keeps me going pretty well.

Raised by a single mother who invested everything in me. I have a stable job earning well above the median in the United States, definitely 7/10 with god-tier face and hair genetics + good body proportions.

But I have problems, and one of those is my robotic personality.

I have had multiple girlfriends in the past, but I only kept them around for the sake of not being lonely and not to remain single. I have never truly met anyone yet that I would want to start a family. I'm a man in my prime and this feel kills me. I have the ability to strike up conversations and get accustomed to new people easily, but as time goes on I lose interest and so do they. I only had a few friends back when I was in high school, and I came out with even less(but life-long) friends.

To tell you the truth, I've bent my personality depending on the social-situation so frequently in my life, to the extent that the person who I once was simply doesn't exist anymore. I lost my true-self in desperation to fit in with normal-fags, and while I did manage to do that, I became a one-size-fits-all caricature of a person who tries to appeal to everyone and be liked by everyone.

Reminder to those who lift for chicks, hopping from one relationship to another won't make you happy, only a wife will.

Sorry about this rant, I needed to let this shit out and this was the most relevant thread I could find.

I lost a brother three years ago. My mom was a mess, I can't make her through that again.

Unironically.

Camus' essay on Sisyphus
he said that pain itself can fill your heart

Why not use those savings and see a psychologist? Down the line sell the pistol and pay the psych with pistol money.

Not my style, I even was depressed for like a year and it didn't occur to me. It's wasn't self-diagnosed snowflake attention-craving, Iwent to a psychologist that diagnosed me depression.
Funny thing is i didn't even think i was depressed, although i knew my behaviour isn't normal.

>implying Jesus didn't literally BTFO the Jews eternally

fear and also

Right now very little

I don't hate myself. Don't get me wrong, I don't always love myself either, but I don't hate myself or my life.

If you do, please get help.

But for real: I was depressed, or thought so, when I was 14. Then I watched Shinji realize his own life has inherent meaning if he wants it to, and that did it.

That was what kept me going first, the section where Sisyphus was walking down the mountain after the boulder rolled down looking at the sun was really beautiful to me.
Now I live for the eternal in mind, for my people who lived before me and the people who will live after me. I would not have been anything if there were no men before me, I would be nothing more than an animal but because of books, essays and shared knowledge I'm an individual made out of all those things I've learned and stand for. I want to conserve and progress that.
Our earthly existence should be a form of a struggle and a test, we are the consciousness of the universe.

finally some taste on this board

> expecting neo-pagan numales to know anything that varg didn't talk about in a jewtube video

milf pootang, cars and of course 1488

Maybe I can start anew. Maybe I can walk away from everything that's haunted me and everything that I have now. I'll walk into the sun, Veeky Forums, I'll leave the world I know and make a better life for myself.

I don't know. When I look for a to live, I can't find one. When I ask myself if I want to die, fear consumes me.

I just want to be strong.

I wont leave a good looking corpse yet

I know it won't help lmao
I'm not in pain or anything, it's okay

BREHHH

Literally how. The Jewish financial elite still controls the most powerful (Christian) nation in the world, the US. Are you fucking delusional or what?

pic related

Any good Christian should know the Jews are inherently living in sin and cannot be trusted, Judaism was rendered irrelevant by Christ.

>The Jewish financial elite still controls the most powerful (Christian) nation in the world

You know its a lot more complex than that, quit acting stupid, all these European countries and the US became the powerhouses that they were as Christian nations. Europeans were literal hunter gatherers before that

wtf same

>Gaul
>hunter gatherers
>vikings
>hunter gatherers
>rome
>hunter gatherers
>greeks
>hunter gatherers

The early neolithic farmers came to europe like 10 000 + years ago you ignorant nigger. Nobody was a hunter gatherer in europe besides the sami in over 10k years. That's a few days before the birth of christ, right?

With the exception of Rome and the Greeks, yes, they pretty much acted like niggers until they were Christianized and civilized.

By this logic, the colonization of Africa must really piss you off

Yes. Surely it's just a coincidence that everything the US does in the middle east goes according to Israeli interests. Any good Christian knows that!
Nothing wrong with hunter gathering btw and no they weren't.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/La_Tène_culture

Here, do some reading. That is just completely false and you don't even have a basic grasp of history.

Me too man, I'm so lonely

I'm not depressed anymore.

sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0306987706001034

I’ve got shit to do faggot. Can’t do an hero yet.

The US was founded by Christians, its not my fault that bastard Wilson sold the US out

>Nothing wrong with hunter gathering btw

Some of us aren't content with living like literal niggers user

>no written language

So they were Niggers with higher IQs then, got it user

>paying for the psychological jew

>making complex and ornate jewelry and metalworks
>niggers

You are just being ridiculous at this point. The germanic peoples had their own writing systems much before christianity as well, so again you are just being a kike.

Still doesn't mean they weren't savages, Amerindians figured out metalworking and making ornate jewelry but I bet you won't come running to defend them like would some snowniggers.

Face, the European people would've never reached their peak like they did without Christianity. They practically conquered the world.

>niggers niggers niggers
>nigger muh founding fathers niggers
The absolute state of the average circumcised American Christian.

that one day Ill get another girl to cuddle with.

I miss it so much guys.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Runes

native americans

>no wheel
>no animal husbandry
>no metalworking

Yeah they are the exact same bro. The vikings directly and indirectly controlled most of christian europe for the better part of a century. The goths conquered large swathes of land and destroyed and took over the christian western roman empire.

>Jews killed him for not being enough of a jew

>Muh kike on a stick

i dont have a gun
just turned 21 so time to apply for my license

man...it's worth living for. being able to be 100% yourself around another person is the best feeling on this earth. being able to experience life with them, share intimate moments with them, and see them learn and grow is life changing.

Yeah it's not like there were great European empires bc. or anything. All thanks to based kike popsicle. Now our culture and religion and soon people is destroyed but hey thats alright because of muh peak civilization

I'm just a /pol/ack who wants to conquer the dark corners of the World and shoot some civilization into savages and save them from themselves

Nice cherrypicking, how about you do some real research instead of reading what you want to read

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metallurgy_in_pre-Columbian_America

They still needed Christ tho, it was for their own good, just like it was for those Snow and Sea savages own good

I haven't told myself i'm good enough to die yet

The greatest European Empires were christian retard, I feel like Neo-Pagans are just mad Christianity brought the best out of them, more than their little forest worshiping cult ever would

Pay them no mind, they're just "intellectual" fags wanting to be unique but also not look like a fedora by praising atheism, they'll grow out of it....maybe.

My bad, I'm in Canada and when people say ijuns I automatically think of the ones we have here.

European dominance in the world came literally 1000 years after the introduction of christianity, and it took that long to see another empire like that of pre christian rome, how exactly do you attribute the success of northern europe when they have repeatedly shown to produce great warriors and great technology (romans took nearly all weapons designs and forging techniques from "savage snow niggers"), not to mention nothern europeans had sailed to greenland and here in canada long before columbus ever set foot, so they were about a milennia ahead in navigation and boatbuilding. Literal niggers bro.

They were Christians by chance. They were successful because of the evolution of civilization. There's nothing that would point to a causality between Christianity and building great empires.

Not an argument.

my girlfriend of 3 years cheated on me a week ago, I loved her so fucking dearly. she was my first love and I thought she would be my last. I could be completely myself with her, all walls down.

I'm horrified I'll never find a girl like her again that will love me. I'm only 21, so there might be hope, but I'm almost done school and it's so much harder to meet someone after school.

I'm really scares bros, been seriously contemplating suicide recently. the pain is too much to bear. I just want her back bros, I just fucking want her back...

So it took them a while to figure it out, they eventually got their shit together and took on the world and won

Christianity gave them the societal glue to keep it together while they conquered the world, reading about early US history will make you realize how important Christianity was in keeping communities together during the Manifest Destiny era. Also without Christian missionaries, Europeans would've probably never left Europe and expanded their empires. Who do you think made the first trek into places like Africa and India?

I don't know

Nordic paganism encouraged unstable behavior. They were good sailors, but that's about it.

Also, Romans took shit from everyone. Early Romans used Celtic helmets, later Romans used Sassanid cavalry armor. That's a moot point.

>Civilization was advancing
>nordfags invade and destroy technology
>saved only by the wit and libraries of christian monks
>bring out the knowledge later once nordfags have receded and start the renissance, aka the restart of civilization

Reminder that all this happened just so you can run your mouth about "muh noble savages", it was called the dark ages for a reason, dipshit.

Because dying would end my suffering, and since I'd hate myself, I'd rather live and suffer.

Oh yeah you're right, focusing on peace among men and prizing wisdom and faith above chimping out for a thunder god had nothing to do with civilization advancing.

Christians have a long history of killing each other because of minor differences in faith. Also fucking around on other continents has brought us nothing but trouble and niggers so thanks a lot assholes.

You seem to have your own version of history

To quote yourself, not an argument

/thread

Yeah history's a lot different when you read it off a cereal box.

All I can say is hang in there and look for opportunities to meet other girls. Might feel like an absolute pit of despair, but it'll go away

>he doesn't know that the dark ages is a meme made up by 14th century italian romaboos
>he doesn't know that most technology began to progress after a short period of overhaul and power struggles for the remnants of the old empire
>he fell for the dark ages meme

You realise no academic actual uses that term anymore right?

People like you are why I will never be a Christian and will never support them. Glad ISIS is killing them tbqh

Don't do it user. We care about you

>tfw all college textbooks still say dark age
>tfw you're still falling for the nord meme
>tfw you can't explain why monastaries had to hoard civilization lest it be destroyed.

Real life isn't like skyrim, buddy.

When exactly did "nordfags invade and destroy technology"
Many of the technological advances in armor and weaponry were in fact made by these so called savage non-christian peoples. The mail armor was a celtic invention for example. The christians seemed to have a habit of adopting pre-christian European technology and never much improving on it

>I just want to be strong
Start with lifting, then make the mind strong

Why? Because I don't shy away in saying the Jews need to convert to be saved as well unlike most mainliners?

Not sure. I thinking I'm just kind of hoping something interesting will happen, like a race war, or a massive asteroid impact. Just anything that might bring an actual challenge to my life. Don't really see the point in ending it, since my life may have little to no value, but it doesn't have negative value.
Also, it would be a bitch move towards the people who care about me.

I finally realized my own potential to change my life for the better and pull myself out of what was pretty much a 6 year existential rut, became Christian and am starting to change my life for the better. Also because I want to see the world fall apart and drag the commies out of their holes and shoot them, and rebuild Western Civilization from the ashes.

>why did monasteries run by a bunch of jews had to hoard their gold from the big bad vikings?

Eveidently they hadn't come up with a way to defend themselves properly. By the arguments given here what exactly makes a monastery full of precious metals "civilization" anymore than a chieftan hoarding gold in his hall?

>nord meme

What about it is a meme? Besides the old roman ruins in which these christians resided, what did they have that the "nords" didn't?

>mfw the anglo-saxons and the normans were "nords"

there is nothing wrong with being a jew user!