Take over england

>take over england
>don't speak english
>force the english nobility to learn french or die
Was it autism

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He needed a kitkat

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It’s called becoming a colonial overlord, Guillaume was one of the first european colonisers and he landed on shit rock across the channel. Anglos are still butthurt that their culture and language are just shittier germanic versions of French.

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>invades England
>France falls to irrelevancy
Good job

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>one of the first european colonisers
Wrong
France was a Frankish colony taken from a Roman colony

Rome is an African colony tho

>Normans
>French

>speak french
>live in france
>genetically descended from the french
>eat frog legs
>is some how not french cause muh viking blood

So how many English-Speaking kings of Jerusalem were there?

France was the premier state in medieval western europe. Literally England was a second rate power and that’s why the 100 years war was such a shock. France was the most important European country until Britain became the dominant colonial power.

«people that speak french, live in france, are genetically french, and are under the authority of the french king, aren’t french»

What Britain did in the 19th century eclipses France's entire pathetic existence.
France can't hold a candle to the accomplishments of Britain and here we are speaking English thanks tonan English colony

3

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>state
>in medieval western europe

wtf

>England was a second rate power and that’s why the 100 years war was such a shock

wtf^2

I find it funny that you're so mad for something you shouldn't be assuming british heritage was to live on for the next few decades. Why are you so mad? Is it that it won't?

>he thinks there were no states in Medieval Europe

People purpotedly confusing "nation-states" with "nations" and "states" to claim the later two didn't exist in medieval era is getting quite tiresome

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>and here we are speaking English thanks to nan English colony

An English colony that only became relevant after France liberated it from Britain's loser influence

Hi lindy
Did you finally confront your mother about who your real biological father is?

What would William the Conquer think of Bomber Harris today?

What?
USA is in no way French. All France did was bankrupt itself in a revenge war against Britain.

My descendent :)

He would hate him for bombing his precious Normandy to ashes just so a bunch of American apes could land there

What did the bongs do in the 19th century? Rule over dirt? Shoot up unarmed pajeets? Starve Boer children? Get ready for a kraut buttrape, an American inflicted humiliation and then giving over to the muzzie headchoppers shortly thereafter?

Nah im kind of glad, french grammar is much better

The Einsatzgruppen was an anti-terrorist organization.

You do know HE tried to learn English, right?

The Anglo-Saxon nobility was fully extirpated, so the nobility of England just became transplanted Frenchmen.
As the Frankish Empire, certainly. After about 1000 to 1600 AD, France is plagued with wars of succession, and the kings struggle to assert their dominance over Burgundian and English territory.

>live in Normandy
>speak their own mixed dialect
>genetically descended from Scandinavians
>is somehow not Norman because muh French concubine

In to the 11th century many of them were bilingual and still dealing with Scandinavians plus their attitudes were definitely not the same as the "French" (which is really half a dozen ethnic groups of various type)

English is Germanic grammar though, unless you can point out some examples. French words are what got added if anything

>normandy is located in france
>normans where vassals of the king of france
>still spoke a dialect of french
>mostly french genetically due to centurys of intermarriage
>not realizing normans where another flavor of french

>"We were only minorly effected by French rule I-I promise! y-you speak our language!"

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>speak their own mixed dialect
Yeah nah, there were like a few spelling differences in some words
Saying Norman French was its own language is like saying American English is

>genetically descended from Scandinavians
By 1066, seven generations of interbreeding without any renewal of Nordic blood had occured
William was something like 80% French and 20% Danish genetically speaking

Imagine being so retarded that you can't even speak the language of your subjects and that language is fucking English

That good feel when you're Scottish and all our Normans were pretty cool guys.
The mad bit is that we were expected to think of them as Anglo-Norman in uni. When I asked why they were Anglo-Norman despite having only just arrived on Britain my tutor said it was a shorthand for anyone who held lands in England as well.
I understood that it was one of the very few unnoticed points of English pride left so I didn't push the issue.

Did the Normans in Scotland marry into nobility as opposed to displacement?

>tfw the only people in Europe that has never been conquered, colonized, in any way subjugated are those smug little bastards, the Danes

they've never even suffered from uprising or civil war, what the hell, how did those little bastards do it?

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Father of ours, though thee dwell on high, you, your name, we hold to be holy. To be(come) is your reich.
There's a bit that reads 'forgiff us oor', lending weight to my theory that the men of Lothian were the best at being Saxons - yet another thing we are best at.

>"you, your name"
>not "thee, thine name"

also
>reich
not an English word

Yeah. Connected Gaelic nobility adopted some aspects of Norman culture, which creates this odd situation where ancient lineages who nobody knows the origins of end up with names like 'de Menteith'.
Robert de Brus' ancestor was supposedly kidnapped and forced into marriage by a Gaelic noblewoman. Whether that is true or not is up to you to decide, but Robert was fluent in the Erse leid.

I changed it because people don't say 'thee' and 'thine' now.

>not an english word

It's used in the Scots dialect.

Denmark had a great deal of its territory conquered and taken away over the years. Its borders changed a lot over time. The core Jutland peninsula territory though is one of the dreariest places on Earth. It's nothing but hills surrounded by moors and peat bogs, the whole peninsula is basically a section of seabed exposed by receding oceans, and really millennia being exposed to the open air has not improved it much.

Every time that invaders arrived at the border, the Danes showed off their manboobs most obscenely, and the attackers would conclude that they didn't want to rule a country of perverts.

>ywn be kidnapped by a qt scottish noblewoman and forced into marriage
Why live

Ah, my friend, you know that I cut the tongues out of all the men who fetishise our women?
Ireland is right next to us. Vent your fantasies on them, they're used to it.
Remember - greasy food and heroin. There are no attractive women in Scotland. None.

>Retards still don't understand that the Normans were Vikings, nor French

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How can an improvement be autism? The Norman invasion positively affected England after they consolidated power.

>KEK autism lmao! Have one upvote friend

Retards still look at Normans at either completely French or thoroughly Scandinavians, not understanding things are a little more complex than that.
They spoke a langue d'oïl which was only slightly influenced by Scandinavian speeches. Their culture was mainly Frankish, even though they kept some Danish customs, such as the "more danico" stuff. Scandinavian languages died in the mid-11th century, the last region where they were spoken being the Cotentin peninsula, which had been quite densely settled by Hiberno-Norses. Regarding DNA... Well, given the fact both Anglo-Danes and Hiberno-Norses only settled in specific areas such as the mouth of the Seine, Pays de Caux, the Cotentin peninsula and to a lesser extent Bessin, the Normans DNA was mostly pre-Viking. Check the family tree of the dukes, allmost all of them were born of Frankish or Breton women.
Now Normans cannot be said to be "French" proper, since the king of France ruled over a small piece of land around Paris. Also, the dukes of Normandy liked to emphasize their Nordic ancestry.

>they wuz Vikangs!
>who had intermarried with the French for several generations
>who spoke a French dialect
>who dressed like the French
>who fought like the French
>who referred to themselves as French
>who were referred to as French by the English

>The Norman invasion positively affected England after they consolidated power
True, but England was already a prosperous, centralized state when the Normans showed up. Not to mention its army was a force that had to be reckoned with.

Denmark had a shit ton of rebellions back in the medieval and renaissance, when it was still something of a major power.
The second recorded Danish king, Harad Bluetooth, was killed by his son, Sweyn Forkbeard (allegedly shot in the ass with an arrow while taking a shit). Later on, you have the Finnerup Lade Murder, The Roskilde 'Bloodfeast', The Stockholm Bloodbath and the Count's Feud. On top of that, peasant wars were a common occurrence for hundreds of years.

In fact, what now amounts to Denmark is very much a rump state; our monarchy descends from Glücksburg/Oldenburg, and has always been more north-German than Danish, and the oldest Danish city is Hedeby, which was lost to the Germans in 1864. Similarly, the center of the Danish church was always Lund in Skaane, which is now Swedish.

People always conveniently forget that England was literally the most advanced state in western Europe thanks to its centralised government and economy as well as an effective military and coinage system
The Norman invasion was literally 'Kara boga' on the part of the barbarous Normans but they would learn to assimilate

People always conveniently forget that England was literally the most advanced state in western Europe thanks to its centralised government and economy as well as an effective military and coinage system
I think it's both due to people who tend to fall for the "Norman civilizing invasion" meme, or, on the other hand, supporter of "muh germanic freedom ruined by mainland oppressors".

?

I forgot the >

I meant :
>People always conveniently forget that England was literally the most advanced state in western Europe thanks to its centralised government and economy as well as an effective military and coinage system
I think it's due to both people who tend to fall for the "Norman civilizing invasion" meme, or, on the other hand, supportesr of "muh germanic freedom ruined by mainland oppressors".

At least Normans banned slavery.
What's the difference between Serfdom and slavery?

Interesting, i never knew any of this. Thanks for the info.

It depends on the region, but as whole, serfdom is still better than slavery.

my understanding: slaves are property, while serfs are technically free but live and work on their employers property

in early modern Russia serfs were pretty close to slaves though i think

Slaves are bound to a person, serfs are bound to land

Did you forget WW2?

>No Pope Tutu
Fucking bearenstein bullshit

I agree, for the most part. Though the hardy and tough land has made the jutes equally tough. Some of Denmarks greatest companies come from jutland.

Also, with improved technology in infrastructure and agriculture it really isn't that bad.

Serfs in Russia became like slaves during Peter the great's reign. They were roaming around in southern Russia killing people.

t. Butthurt reditter himself

Yeah, black-haired brown-eyed "vikings" who spoke French and used cavalry....

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>Europoors hating on Anglos while speaking English
Everybody in the world has been thouroughly cucked & fucked by English speakers. Just accept your inferiority.

>recolouring a british Pepe when British identity let the huegonts who were definetly French assimilate
>when the king of France is still called king of the franks you have ‘French’ ‘people

>Aquitaine is located in France
>Gascons were vassals if the king of France
>spoke a dialect of French
>mostly French due to centuries of intermarrying and rebellion killing the men off
>not realising gascons were another form of French
See how fucking stupid you look

Ww2 they were occupied
Numerous civil wars
Cnut got cucked by his viceroy
Got blew up by British navy in napeolonic wars
Got colonised by Germanics with their rune language
Got conquered by Christians

Yeah no

>Europoors hating on Anglos while speaking English

Because of America, a country that exists because Europe (France, Spain and the Netherlands) cucked Britain in a war in 1783

Sorry if you use heavy cav that actually makes you Arabic, see the successes of the caliphate until Tours where a forest got in the way

I am William the Conqueror's 29th great-grandson.

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>spoke a dialect of French

Wrong, they spoke Occitan
Normans however spoke Oil Language (Old French)

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>these eyes

Truly the nordikest vikangz that ever vikinged

His mother was a peasant woman, wasn't she?
William was a bastard (his nickname was William the Bastard), he wasn't pure Norman stock (if such a thing exists).

I know that painting didn’t happen at the time but look at his sword, never noticed that shape before
No they both spoke dialects

How is that an argument? It's not like french heritage will live on in the next few decades.

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theguardian.com/books/2016/aug/20/william-i-how-we-misunderstood-the-conqueror-for-950-years
Reminder William was a cruel bastard
Reminder he wants to resurrect French diplomacy

*blocks your path*

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>if such a thing exists

It existed in 911 when they settled, but certainly not in 1066
The Normans brought no women with them, so they exclusively interbred with locals
By 1066 (seven generations after the settling), Normans were over 80% French

Thought so.

I wish I could speak

>speak english
>live in uk
>genetically descended from celts
>eat chips
>is some how not english cause muh scottish blood

Did he actually say that?

Yes

>we sure showed them 800 years later

The english are anglo-saxons, not celts

The concept of French as we know it didn't exist in 1066.

No, speaking Old French in 1066 does not make someone the same as being French in 2018

"As we know it" doesn't mean shit, nations evolve constantly
But French identity has existed since the collapse of the Frankish Empire in the 9th century (that's when French and German nations were born)

And just in case you're one of these retards who think nations didn't exist in medieval era, ues they did
It's "nation-states" (=/=nation and =/=state) that didn't

>the british empire is americas fault

>French identity didn’t exist prior to 1066
France is one of the oldest states

there still not states just a bunch of micro-countries with no federal government that all hate each other

Way to misinterpret what he actually said. What he said was that there was not one single french culture but actually many cultures in France such as bretons, occitans, alsatians, etc.

"Il y a pas UNE culture française" is what he said

All the coping ITT didn't know the English was this pathetic

The British "empire" of dirt isn't the reason why Europe (or any relevant country for what matters) speaks English
Post-WW2 American hegemony is

Shut up you retarded frog

>People always conveniently forget that England was literally the most advanced state in western Europe thanks to its centralised government and economy as well as an effective military and coinage system
Who was responsible for making England the most centralized state in Western Europe if not Billy Bastard? I thought it was him, since he built so many castles to intimidate the native Anglo-Saxons.

otto ii subjugated the danes
magnus the good too
scania got colonized so hard they started speaking swedish
bismarck fucked them over so hard the danish king offered the entirety of denmark to join germany
got conquered so fast in ww2 its considered one of the shortest military operations during ww2

are his eyes blue?