When Was The Last Time You Got Your Ass Kicked?

I had no idea what it was, I had just seen it in a movie

12, bus stop going back from school. South american cunt kept menacing me with his keys, tried to strangle me and we fought.
Little did I know his father was training him to fight other kids. Got fucked, not surprising, only thing I cared about at the time was pokemon.

youtube.com/watch?v=AfMbN_MzCpw

How does Veeky Forums respond?

>1.5 years ago be me 22 years old sitting on couch with head back eyes closed one, arm around my gf and the other holding a beer
>just got home from uni for summer so my brother and I were having friends over for drinks at my moms place
>majority of my friends and brother leave to get drinks(it's the start of the day evening so no one is drunk or really there yet)
>it's just me my gf another girl M and a friend, N
>suddenly get struck in the groin while I'm laying back still and wake up to see N giggling like a school girl
>yell "WHAT THE FUCK"
>he starts running out to my backyard
>I chase after him and deck him in the side of the head and tell him off
>he's on the ground looking for his glasses
>walk back in to garage in full rage mode
>he comes back in while I'm sitting back down with my gf
>gets in front of me decks me in the jaw
>try to push him away because gf and M are sitting on couch less than a foot away and don't want them to get hit
>puts me into a rear choke and then everything goes black
>I slump down to my knees and can only hear muffled screaming from the girls
>wake up never feeling more humiliated in my entire life
>for some reason N is still there
>he asks me if I want him to leave
>ask him if he's fucking stupid and tell him to gtfo
>as he's walking out tell him I'm sorry this had to happen but he's never going to be welcome here again

Seriously might be the most humiliating thing to ever happen to me. I should've known to not let my guard down around a man still immature enough to think hitting your friend in the groin is still acceptable. I thought he might've been realized that maybe it was his fault he got decked in the head since he shouldn't have punched me in the dick like a middle schooler. Also he had like 100 lbs on me and wrestling experience so definitely not a fight I could've won on my own.

It's never happened and I hope it never does. I've dished it out pretty nicely a few times and literally didn't even get hit in the process.

Friend of mine went like 1 on 4 and literally his face looked like he was a mutant for a few weeks. I think he actually got 2 of them pretty nice before the jolly green giant got out of the car and ruined his day.

>be me
>innamuhreens, bar hopping in San Diego
>trying to find the answers to my problems at the bottom of every shot glass I bought
>buddy who is equally shit-faced comes up to me and asks me if I want to start a fight
>think this is a great idea in my drunken haze
>start talking shit to group of niggers, last thing I remember saying was "Listen Buddy"
>stocky nigger throws punch, eat it like a champ and swing back
>get a punches in before getting swarmed by his friends
>buddy jumps in and starts throwing haymakers, actually manages to rock one of the niggers
>other friend with us jump in, fight turns into a fucking drunken brawl with me soaking in most of the hits
>bouncers break up fight, quite literally get thrown out of bar and banned for life
>miraculously didn't break anything outside of a tooth or two coming loose
>face is quite noticeably bruised, nose is bleeding and have shiner, blood all over my knuckles
>mfw my entire body and face the next morning

I got beat the fuck up, I am fucking lucky I didn't end up in a wheel chair. That wouldn't be last bar fight either, I'm gonna die young guys

Physically 3 years
Emotional 2 hours ago

I would throw down, even if I took a beating. Might use a fork.

Better to stand up for yourself and get beat than be a doormat.

Was he legit retarded? Doesn't sound like regular human behavior to me.
Also what the fuck kind of friends you have to let him stay there.

Wrong post.

don't mess with teenagers, they're children inside adult bodies.

Never. Lucky enough when i was a dumb teenager i would always intimitade my opponent into thinking he cant win
Nowadays i just dont party anymore

thelastpsychiatrist.com/2010/09/when_was_the_last_time_you_got.html

>be reLLY DRUNK 18YO
>some asshole at party strangles me till I pas out

Don't know if I can even count that since I was so drunk and didn't even get in a fight, he just came up and grabbed me and I though is was one of my friends playing . Was kinda annoyed with friends though that they didn't do anything.
"It's not like he was gonna rape you". WTF do you not know you can get brain damage?

Haven't been in a real fight since kindergarten.

>doesn't know it was his gf who hit him the D

Honestly this guy really was that stupid. He was the punching bag of our group because of how dumb he was. Our friend group has dozens of inside jokes based off of him mispronouncing words or candidly behaving like an idiot.

To answer your second question the only other friends that were there were two girls and they just screamed during the whole situation. Don't ever rely on women lol

Never. In fact, not only do I seem to avoid tense situations, I never seem to happen upon them anymore. The last situation that could even escelate into a fight was 2 or 3 years ago, and I still get out rather often.

And I honestly kinda miss it. I'm not even Veeky Forums, I'm a fucking skelly.

This. I've never been in a fight in my life. 29 years and nothing. Every time it's been defused by words, because we're not fucking chimps anymore.

Life is constantly Kicking my ass

thelastpsychiatrist.com/2010/09/when_was_the_last_time_you_got.html

Probably like ten years ago trying to fight my cousin that's 7 years older than me. Learned some important lessons from doing that.

never been beat up

I did beat up some indian kid tho for touching on some swedish girl @ a party

>I was like 15 and the whole class thought it was cool to have a friendly 1v1 brawl but no hits to the face and the balls
>Every other night the guys snuck into the gymnasium to do this shit
>I was only 5'4 while the guy I was pit with was already 6'1 genetics got him built like a brick shithouse even without lifting and from the wrestling team while I was from boxing
>Got him good in the solar plexus but I got wrestled to the mats and got ktfo from a choke hold
I miss boarding school, lads. We were rowdy as shit but we were all friends.

I was a cocky shit when I was 12. I was a star youth football player and I was good at hitting people. I beat up everyone I ever got in a fight with. One day one of my tall friends in the neighborhood was walking with me. We got into an argument and I started to talk shit then I began to rush him to tackle him. He slugged in the face, knocked me down to the ground and kicked me multiple on the ground. I cried afterwards and never got in a fight again.

That's somewhat a lie though. I slammed my friends face into a bus window and then punched a kid in the face on the bus because he was staring at me.

My penchant for violence ended in 8th grade I'm a nice guy now :)

I went for the first time to a football hooligan fight in some lonely forest at night.
Got beated up pretty bad, broken rib and black eye.
Still shit was cash, felt like a fucking barbarian going with 100 bros to a fight

Never. Everyone wants to talk shit to the giant at the bar but no one wants to actually swing on him. I use my words to defuse and they get to call me a pussy and feel like a big man. I don't mind. The problem is that since I've started working out I've gotten more masculine feeling and I'm afraid very suddenly I might snap and murder a Manlet.
Oh when will they learn

Nah, unless you count wrestling or Muay Thai. Never lost a schoolyard fight and I've yet to even witness a bar fight so I'm okay

>implying it would be murder
Basically a different species.

It's odd because I'm training one now. My best friend is about 5'5" and I'm 6'2"
Our lifting group is very odd.

Is it true CK is a sexual predator?

When I was 14. Had been ice skating, some chav cunts where throwing ice balls at people and I told them to get fucked. Came time to take my skates off and this little 12 year old who is with them comes up and throws a sucker punch at me while I'm leaning over unlacing my skates. This kid is tiny so obviously it didn't even hurt but I stand up and his nigger mate who was at least 17/18 and about 6'3 just jumps at me straight away and starts wailing on me. I threw a punch back at him and then his mates all piled in as well and gave me a bit of a kicking.

The answer to your question is the same as the answer to this question:

Does he have a penis?

>start a random fight
>calls others niggers

No user. Your the nigger

>An observation about the middle class: they have it deep inside their psyche that though they are taught to make prejudicial judgments based on hearsay, they are not allowed to show that they made them. The middle class think they are lawyers.

What do I say?

Only when I'm drunk

>highschool kids
>wearing their jersey from the highschool
>with their numbers on it
>they're giving your their names
>guy openly admits to beating a guy two days prior
>enough to send them to the hospital

Sounds like an easy way to get somebody off of a team, suspended from highschool and into Juvy.

say hi

call her a roastie cunt

Genious.

...

I have a penis but I'm a 32 year old wizard. Am I a sexual predator?

Well done. Now the ball is in her court and you've put forth the exact amount of effort she has.

You're well on your way to not being consider a social outcast.

About three months ago, I was shitfaced and asked one of my shipmates to box. I stuck with body blows, he punched me in the head a few times and gave me a concussion.

If you cant still act human when drunk, dont drink.

Say
>G'day luv
Works on Ameribetes all the time

t. A bitch nigga that will take incalculable amounts of shit and do nothing about it.

Yea, after you beat their asses they will just run away because they don't want anyone to call mommy. You ask your lady to hold your coat, and peoceed to beat the shit out of inexperienced fighters who don't honestly look that strong.

That being said, fuck Louis C.K. this scene was about his cuckolding humiliation fetishism he pushes. (irish kike, btw)

Too many years of being the beansprout before getting fit made my first instinct to always diffuse the situation, so I'm good at doing that.
Never had "my ass kicked", had playfights, but it's never escalated into a full on "I'm gonna hurt you" fight.

your gay. get into a fight mate they are fun as fuck and good for knockin out filthy fucking lebs

>fun as fuck
>it's essentially a stare down/size up, waiting for the other person to act or a sucker punch
>lasts for all of 10 seconds before going to the ground/involving objects around you
>following that it then lasts no more than 20seconds
>20seconds
>fun

Bet you call the 20 seconds of sex before you orgasm fun for your spouse too normie.

>H-hey chad it's really cool that you like my girlfriend but could you please bring it to dms so I don't have to hear it? Her cell phone number is ---

Fucking pathetic. This is what drinking unfiltered tap water does to you.

being a spineless cuck is NOT intellectual

>7th grade
>faggot talkin shit
>trying to get me and some other dude to fight
>he caves and starts predicting the outcome
>oh boy here we go
>explain that he's just a faggot trying to get us to fight and you need to stop talking shit.
>notice primary fag has an ear ring, mental note
>secondary fag heeds my warning and fucks off
>primary fag is mad.
>teacher exits room, game time
>stand up to sharpen pencil
>fag starts talking shit, blocks path
>shoves me, go time
>punch this faggot in his nose square, hard
>punch with your legs anons, trust me
>teacher walks back into room, obese lady
>fag is disoriented, throw him throw open desks anyway
>rip out faggoty earring
>whole class is staring at his bleeding ear
>teacher makes me give it back
>slap his face with open palm containing spikey ear ring
Only lasted maybe 30 seconds, if that. I never got my ass kicked, but then again the only fights I've ever been in are when dyel lippy faggots come at me.

t. an adult

by responding "t." to his comment, you said that the guy you responded to was an adult

Third grade and then I hit my growth spurt and I’ve never had a problem since. Im fucking terrified of ever getting into a real fight so I hope I can keep the streak going

>spouse
>not spouses
Haramkeks

In high school some fatass in the year above me threw a shoe at me. I said "who the fuck throws shoes?" and threw it back at him and so he got his grunts to chase me and hold me down while he waddled over and started beating me up with his buddies. I just laughed like a beta bitch pretending it was all a funny joke. At the time I felt like such a pathetic faggot but ever since then I feel like I could take on anyone, like if anybody tried to fight me now I'd be ready and know exactly how to respond. That was about 7 years ago and since then I haven't been in a fight.

>literally 90% of people who drink

When they stop, I'll stop

>if anybody tried to fight me now I'd be ready and know exactly how to respond
everybody says this user, doesn't make it true

ouch

> When was the last time you took two slugs in the stomach, friendo?