I need to eat 2000 calories calories within the next two hours

> I need to eat 2000 calories calories within the next two hours

Bulking as a Skelly is suffering

psh, ez

>what is fast food

thats just 20 tablespoons of olive oil cmon

>what is olive oil

Peanut butter, Nutella, Jam and banana sandwiches
And a couple of fried eggs on the side

Or about 20 bar wings.

could it be time to try... 6 scoops?

> Mwf I do OMAD and do this every day.

Bruh I've sat down an ate a 2000 kcal lunch within fifteen minutes you are a little bitch

Cutting guy here, I'd fucking bash your head into a wall and eat your brains.

>6 scoops
>asking someone to an hero
nice try shill

That's less than my dinner on an average day. Stay mad

Go to baskin robbins and just get any large shake, they're anywhere from 1600 to 2800 cals

>2 peanut butter sandwiches with only two tablespoon on each slice is 1140 calories. Alone.
>This faggot can't think of any other food and drink to cover the rest of the 860 calories required to meet his daily calorie intake.
You're not gonna make it.

icecream+PB sandwich, 1L (quarter gallon) of whole milk
ezpz

>keto bulking
>need to eat 4500kcals
>/r/ketogains recommends heavy cream
>drink 4 cups of heavy cream and 20 scoops of whey
>no longer unironically thinking of suicide
>am thinking about literal suicide
>gut blows up and look pregante
>the child inside of my innards is screaming for release
>little does he know I'm severely lactose racist
>next day i cannot shit
>only the decomposed nitrogen of my dead child is passing out of my ass
>drink 10 tablespoons of olive oil to remedy problem and hit macros
>no longer want to die
>now want to die a violent death
>screams of the damned ringing in my ears
>everclear cant kill my demons they know how to not be fucking lightweights
>tap out on my gf's tranquilizers for her mania

If I had a gun I would empty it into my stomach and then kill my turtle before putting it in my mouth and pulling the trigger.

Please recommend good keto bulking foods before I have to take dire action.

why are you eating the memest of all diets? keto is idiotic

Easier on my Celiacs and I am a binge eater if I'm eating carbs.

>keto is idiotic
It just works.

Someone please respond, I don't want to kill my russian turtoise.

Dude, keto is for weightloss, don't be a retard, don't bulk on keto. Bulk on carbs and fat.

This
If you're hellbent on bulking on Keto, just eat eggs and nuts. Especially nuts

Eggs only have 70 cals, I already down those fuckers 10 at a time. Almonds, I can get like 700kcals for 100 and I usually have 250, but it's hard mane. I can't eat meat anymore because I'm so fucking full.

Hmm... I imagine you drink protein shakes yeah? Why not add a few scoops of peanut butter?

This is a good idea, thank you.

>keto bulking
you can't make this shit up

I am a proud bbw black QUEEN and I don't need this.

>be skelly entire life
>full after eating 300 calories
why is bulking so hard bros?

this

Can you buy a laxative?

Enjoy your diabetes. Nigger, just go under your total for today instead of fucking up your health thinking it will somehow help your gains to trigger a prediabetic state with a huge amount of cals consumed rapidly.

cashews, peanut butter, put butter and oil on everything

>I can eat whatever I want and wont gain weight
>literally cant eat like a normal person
I don't know this feel, but I know it is true in many cases
Do you like hate food? I'm getting to a bf% i'm comfortable with soon, but I could just fucking eat all day everyday, but have to actively limit myself constantly

I bet you keep your mouth under a chickens ass all day

went from 100lb manlet to 160lb manlet dear christ do i know this feel
olive oil in your protein shakes or eat peanut butter throughout the day and watch your fat macros. hell is having to eat 500 calories of chicken and rice

3 cups of whole milk
frozen banana
scoop of chocolate flavored whey
cup of hazelnuts


about 1,900 calories and 45-65 grams of protein, depending on the whey