Nofap

I am extremely fucking horny
I'll be going to a social gathering with normies tonight
can someone give me a foolproof guide on how to stick my penis in one of the females
please this is very important

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drive.google.com/open?id=0B8TBYZBSZJo4d21xX0dwcUZPLXc
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help me please

someone on /int/ posted a picture of a naked asian girl
now I'm going crazy
help help help
me want sex

No fap is fucking retarded you moron. How many fucking times does literally everyone have to tell you that its a meme?

8=======D ~~ (;)

no it isn't cucklet
fapping decreases androgen receptors and dopamine receptors and increases prolactin
now just help me stick my penis into a woman okay faggot?

Oh so are you one of those morons that was doing it to the detriment of everything else in their lives?

Well yeah then of course it helps you retard. It was an addiction for you.

There's no fucking way you're going to pull a woman when you're this desperate, pathetic mess you moron. Just crank one out and go to the party.

>Just crank one out
isn't it shabbat today shlomo you shouldn't be on the internet

remember when you were 12 and first started watching porn and it awoke a monster inside of you and you were shaking and didn't know what to do and finally started to rub your boner furiously and finally came and you were excited and ashamed at the same time. Ah.. the good ol' days

MY PENIS WANTS SEX

my ballsack just deflated what the fuck

lower your expectations a lot, but not too low

you sound desperate, women can literally smell the desperation like a shark smelling blood from miles away. if you look at a chick across the room and she looks at you, never break eye contact first, they will instantly peg you as inferior. hold eye contact until they break it, even if you feel like a psychopath. it turns them on

>tfw I was 11 and it was Natasha henstridge in Species

I honestly feel bad for the lads who grew up on nothing but hard porn, never knowing the tension of sitting up watching shite films on channel 5 for a chance to see some bush.

yes I am desperate

>Species

I fucking love you man.

I have been searching for this fucking movie since my childhood.

It's such a comfy 90s b-classic

So whats your point? First you say its a meme then when he says its not because he has a problem, you say "oh yeah so you're a moron who has a problem with fapping then yeah its a problem and no fap will help" You literally sound like a fucking retard looking to start pointless arguments with strangers on the internet.

You're a fucking retard.

Quit alcohol right now.

Wow look at those huge chanegs its made to your live. Wait, i bet it hasn't made any real changes to you whatsoever, right?

if you fucking abuse something then of course not doing it has a positive fucking effect, but the vast majority of people don't sit in their rooms masturbating 10 times a day to the detriment of everything else in their lives. That is literally the only scenario in which nofap is positive.

Stop being such a fucking brainlet. If you crank one out a few times a day, nofap will have literally no fucking benefits beyond a placebo, which itself only happens because you were pathetic enough to feel guilty about masturbating in the first place.

This is the best answer you will get, OP

Pay an escort, that's what men of our stock have always done.

define 'female' OP

humanoid creature that makes my peepee do a teepee in my pants

OP, I will help you. I have a 1GB zip file of webms explaining how to escalate towards sex, finger a girl, eat her out and generally good sex positions. It's pathetic that our fathers never thaught us how to get pussy, so that's what we have to refer to. I'll finish my food and upload it for you, give 30 min.

>first cum was a wet dream
>first fap was at 14 sometime later after everyone never stopped teasing me for not knowing what it was
>fapped to dead or alive volleyball
>didn't know what the fuck all this white shit was that I got everywhere

It was literally a bucketload of cum because I had unknowingly done nofap long after hitting puberty because I had no idea what madturbation was or how to do it. All i knew was that I got excited by anime tiddies

lol I remember discovering YouTube and I never had to wait for something sext to come on the TV ever again

5th day of nofap here

going strong

I remember at 14 I would sneak into the living room at 1 or 2am just to switch to babe station and try to crank one out without being caught

Might do it tonight for nostalgia

Day 15 for me, been on a flatline since start.

thank you user

This right here.

Sucks to be bottom of the barrel doesnt it.

Lol, shlongberg btfo

bumping for interest

he seems to have disappeared

Fuck, sorry guys. I totally forgot to post once i finished eating. I hope its not too late.

All the webms contain nekid women. So if you are doing nofap, wear a thick belt and dont touch your wiener.

drive.google.com/open?id=0B8TBYZBSZJo4d21xX0dwcUZPLXc

thx

>There's no fucking way you're going to pull a woman when you're this desperate, pathetic mess you moron. Just crank one out and go to the party.

Follow this advice, OP. People can smell desperation a mile away, especially when you're gonna be right next to a bunch of other, non desperate, people

For me it was the escorts in the phone book.

No it doesn't you broscience brainlet

Ah, the old dramboobie showcase review. Good times.

>social gathering
can i come?

Much appreciated!

user. You are a god. You are the kindest man on this earth! Thank you so much!

Go buy some phenibut

>drive.google.com/open?id=0B8TBYZBSZJo4d21xX0dwcUZPLXc
Much appreciated bro

It's only Day 4 and my dick is hard as a rock just from scrolling casually through help.

yup

Day 4 over successfully
>tfw

Nofap literally provides no benefit, in fact, what little benefit it does provide (extremely minimal btw) is outweighed greatly by the harm it does to your mental health.

well i've got an addictive personality
day 4 of no fap and now I just think about my weekly joint I get to smoke

>improved discipline and self-control
>no benefit

Do you require assistance putting on your pants in the morning?

I've only fapped once in my life. Nocturnal emissions are quite frequent compared to the average person.
Stop being weak.