Shit National Geographic won't tell you

ITT we share stories about next to unknown reasons why you country got assblasted hard

>Be a Gaul
>Be Brennos
>Gaul don't allow torture
>Gaul don't ritual sacrifice
>Gaul don't do cannibalism
>Pray the old Gods
>Shit is fine and dandy, kick the ass of Germans and some weird dudes from the North
>Yearly meetings of chief of each house in Gaul to discuss politics, military, economy and settle some bullshit from peasants
>I, Brennos, a noname warrior drunk too much ale and claim me and my boys could raid and fuck the shit out of Rome
>Chiefs laughs and say "fuck off Brennos, you're drunk"
>"I will show them"
>18 of July 390 BC
>Time to raid
>Crush Roman army
>What's left of the Roman army btfo to Cerveteri and Veio
>Begin the sack of Rome
>"I like this place, i will stay for a while"
>After 2 months it's not fun anymore, ask a ransom to go be a raider somewhere else
>"Gimme 1000 golden shekels"
>"B-b-but that would barely be all we have"
>Put my sword on the balance, thus increasing the price they will have to pay
>Say out loud "Vae Victis" to the whimpy faggs
>They pay
>Go to north of Italy and settle here, rich of many shekels, foods and bitches
>TheMadmanActualyDidIt.png
>Chiefs of each house learn that and have a common solid kek
>Back to business

>Be 60 BC
>Be Julius Caesar
>Make one of the biggest selling point of my campain to be a Governor to use the 4 Legions given to the Governor role of this region to kick the Gaul's ass so bad they will serve as slave for the next 200 years
>Go as far a bribing Pompey himself
>"Ok Julius, you're in charge now"
>Payback.avi
>Not enough money anymore from bribing left and right, payback Gaul even harder and toss back "Vae Victis" to their "savage" faces at Alésia

Rest is history.

fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brennos_(IVe_siècle_av._J.-C.) it's here, but in baguette and lack alot of shit, like what happen'd to him in the end, Romans where pissed about that and burned quite some books talking about it.

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Brennos absolute MADMAN

It's all fun and game until Caesar come to vaporize your country

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Jordanes wrote a book called Getica in which he linked the goths to the Getae (dacian) tribe.He even claimed that the Getae were part of the ancestors of the gothic people.Funny shit.

I like the theory that the Gauls never even intended to sack Rome, and that they were just on their way to fight as mercenaries in Sicily when they came across a city ripe for sacking.
Who knows if thats true, but it puts everything in a different light.

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>blocks your path
>Non auro, sed ferro, recuperanda est patria

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By the heavens, what I wouldn't do to get into a room full of gorgeous naked roman women like in OP's pic.

Just lol at roman faggots having to resort to falsifying history to retain their pride. Bunch of cunts couldnt face the facts

user, your masturbation to the days long gone doesnt change the fact that gauls got BTFO hard, regardless of whether romans "re-wrote history" or not

>Gauls from Armorica come out of nowhere in the 5th century to help the Romans against the Goths
>after a few initial victories they get betrayed by some local noname politician and ambushed to death
At least they went out in style

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You actually believe that camillus as a deus ex machina saved Rome? Lmao at you fucking gullible romaboo.

Btw, not a galloboo at all. But if you take the narrative of livy about the siege of Rome for granted you should gtfo.

Yeah, okay, gauls did sack Rome that one time, satisfied yet? Cool, now that this is settled, let's talk about the next ~800 years of gaul history.

>Yeah, okay, gauls did sack Rome that one time, satisfied yet?

Then why did you post Spastic cant even remember what he posted gtfo you utter subhuman

Wait, serious now. I thought that the disputed thing was the fact of Camillus's arrival at the "Vae victis" moment, before the actual sacking could take place. Isnt the fact that Camillus did defeat the Gauls, before or after the sacking, non-debatable?

The gauls sacked rome in retaliation for roman diplomats killing gaulish chieftains during a negotiation gone wrong which the romans were doing for a neighbouring city.

If Anthemius wasn't such a shitter he could've saved them. But no, he had to cement himself in the annals of history as "Majorian but unsuccessful"

>modern french
>gallic

>ITT we share stories about next to unknown reasons why you country got assblasted hard

>It's all fun and game until Caesar come to vaporize your country

>REEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>Stop talking about history
>You're only allowed to speak about when you get btfo like the French bitch you are
>Camillius is my husbando
>REEEEEEEEE

Realy make you think

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i thought he threw the sword on the scale and said "woe to the conquered"

>he did

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they are, just like spanish and northern italians.

He fled when he realised you were a decent human being