A....am I Chad? Help me bros

That

My first pic is just my face, then me with friends, and then me with friends at the beach. Bio is literally just a list of my interests

girl I fucked last night sent me this

I think I made it guys

Can you maybe show just one pic?
I want to know if God also took his time on me.

Can we ban these threads, they make me wanna JUST

> You are observant.
> Let's time is of the essence ... your place or mine

>this will NEVER happen to you

I became Chad. I am now in a relationship with Stacey. Stacey has a degree in psychology and is in line to receive her medical doctor degree. She plans on becoming a psychiatrist. By the way, she also went to a renowned vocational cooking & gastronomy school before college, so she can create stupendous dinners and serve them like a pro.

Stacey started going to the gym for me, to be as fit as me and go to the gym together. Stacey does everything I ask her for. Pretty much everyone, including Staceys thousands of Instagram followers agree that Stacey already looks like a model even without going to the gym. People usually faint when they find out that this stunningly beautiful rose got two degrees, with one of them being a MD. Stacey is a bit obsessed with my affection, she considers another man winking at her borderline cheating and tells me about it when it happens, while tearing up. Staceys parents are very well off. The own a house and gave her one of the apartments they own.

We are known as the perfect couple and friends started calling us by combining our names (Chacy). Staceys parents love me, my parents love Stacey.

Stacey is not my type and basically I feel pretty much nothing for her, when we have sex I have to think of porn and can barely keep my dick hard, what should I do?

>fuck you bitch it took me years to achieve this physique.
>the only god that made me the way i am is myself.

She then texts "Sorry, wrong guy".

>tfw lift specifically to ragdoll my woman in bed
>but no woman to ragdoll

The only people who show sexual interest in me are homos. I literally lost my virginity fucking a guy because I was so tired of having no success with women.

kek

>Needing to lift to ragdoll a woman
How fucking weak were you?

>match with some really hot asian chick
>really slutty looking, big tits that are obviously fake and big thighs and waste
>she starts talking to me
>looking through her profile
>"trans girl ;)"

>and tells me about it when it happens, while tearing up
You're larping but it sounds like she's great at manipulating you

hes made it

How did a closet Veeky Forums autist score that?

Tinder?

A 130lb lanklet xc runner. Now I'm a 170lb and don't blow away in the wind anymore

Went with variant of this. Will post results.

you blew it.

Good chance she's baiting you for a giggle

Now that's test-driven.

holy shit that was bad

HOW DID YOU FUCK THAT UP

THAT WAS SO UNSMOOTH JESUS CHRIST

autism

Fucking awful, wtf.

kys

Leave Elizabeth alone!

...

don't listen to these autists user, she'll like the aggression

Wow you all really care what some random tinder roastie thinks of you? I do it for the laffs

Oh c'mon man

Dude you fucking ruined it, it's all over.

Hahah jesus dude.

Jesus Christ this is so bad

Reddit

Post response now!!!! i have to go soon!!

Put me in the screencap.

>im retarded on purpose h-haha

Who hurt you frog?

post profile pic for reference

Grindr, Stacey is a guy too.

I don't see what's wrong with this

Its not about being agressive you autist
>god took his time on you
>h-he took his time so i dont have to...
what a retarded reply is that
still shes a thirsty basic bitch, maybe op can still pull it regardless

I get the feeling she's fat. Is she fat?

...

>girl who stopped texting me was named elizabeth

YOU STOP RIGHT NOW

>t. Sour grapes

You literally had a chick drooling over your for a free trip to the D Capitol and you fumbled out a response more full of spaghetti than an italian restaurant.

Dr. user is here, and I'm prescribing you a rope to kill yourself.

>spending idle time on poor humour
The joke's on you buddy

...

?

It's the kind of a reply a tinder slut will eat right up, you fucking ball hair

>OP replies with something you would never have the balls to say to a girl
>"ya blew it OP/wow lol so bad/OP YOU FAGGOT YOU MESSED UP SO BADLY

>felt less selfconcious because he was able to move her
sounds fat, why would a small/slim woman worry about something like that?
>inb4 he fell for the braphog meme

>He took his time so that I don't have to
Defuk m8?

Men just don't do that that's why. Most guys bought into the making love meme and have missionary for 5 minutes.

Of course every guy could through around a slut but rarely anybody does that. That's why the are so suprised

...

I love how all of you are telling him what a terrible move that was and yet no one has any useful suggestions.

What he said wasn't great but it will still probably work. "He took his time so I don't have to, your place or mine" translates to "Genetics made me extra pretty so I don't have to do any prep or bother taking care of my skin and I still look like this, wanna smash?" And she's probably going to say yes.

thats not what he meant

None of them know how to fuck Tinder sluts. Probably beat around the bush and at best buy her dinner before dropping her off to get dicked down by Chad

fk my sides...

Yeah op must be such a thundercock the first thing he does when a woman talks to him is going to ask for help on a internet forum
im ovulating here after such display

nice!

bitches like her love that shit

Sounds like he meant that god took his time on him so that he can fuck her without any foreplay. It works for tinder and I don't know why these autists are saying he goofd.

I bet she is going to respond positively and all these beta's responding to you will be BTFO

>"Nah you're too young"
why you gotta hit me like that

DELET THIS

this has nothing to do with fitness you retard. fuck off.

reminder: do not engage shit posting morons. sage, report and ignore.

pasta

If she wants to fuck the guy she's going to come up with the most "acceptable" explanation for what he said she can think of and that's it.

I'm a woman and I didn't assume this AT ALL. We want to assume the guy isn't being an asshole and we want to assume really hot guys know what to do in bed, including foreplay.

>tfw it's a bot

Good shit

jesus user

Do people really not do that? Completely unironic here

I'm by no means a chad, only ever had sex in two serious, commited relationships but even with my first girl I obviously did this stuff.
Like, why wouldn't you, it's pretty much instinct to throw her around and slam her on the bed, choke her, grab her, stand up with her etc all while keeping up the love making meme with slow phases with kissing and closeness?

How could you just lay still and thrust every once in a while when this feeling on your dick is literally blowing your brains out with hormones.

Nope!

>she messaged first and used heart eye and drooling emojis

BEGONE THOT

Not him but I don’t think this was that bad. Why is everyone freaking out

high test alpha response

I thought it was more along the lines of "God took his time so we can skip this pointless chatter and skip to the fucking (foreplay included)"

well mostly because we know it's not true and just a sequence of words put into order to convey a certain image. yeah, she might say yes but our collective knowledge of this board knows how hollow it most likely is.

that said, it's not a terrible response. i personally would've made it work with a little more talk but maybe putting her on the spot like that works.

Pretty much this
Even thought it was completely obvious to be meant like that

this will get you laid. dont listen to what fags here tell you

...

...

Most people consider foreplay part of sex. He's hot so she's not going to assume he's an autist who doesn't know how to foreplay.

this is an important lesson to learn. not all of us are gonna make it. and that's fine

not bad really

I'm Chad now.

post her reply if you get one

god i love Veeky Forums