>ywn live in middle ages
>ywn become a squire
>ywn get knighted
>ywn join military order
>ywn take vows of celibacy and live in seclusion from thots
>ywn go on crusade
>ywn fight side by side with your brothers in faith against waves of infidels
Why live?
thread theme youtube.com
You’d be Percy. Percy the Peasant.
Why do you think you'd be anything but a poopsmith?
you have a point
I have documentated noble ancestry
First, being a noble doesn't ensure anything of what you just said. Second, your traveling back could alter the timelines so this isn't the case. Third, don't lie on anonymous image board you faggot.
are you, by chance, an american ?
>ywn starve to death walking across Antonlia
>ywn have to butcher your horses eat them and still starve
>ywn die of some shitty infection in the middle of a desert or slowly bleed out when a arrow pieces your guts or goes though your throat
>ywn have a organised commitee of crusade leaders who don't disagree or randomly leave and start up new kingdom's halfway there
what the hell is wrong with you /pol/tards?
infidels? crusades? shitty middle ages? thots?
why would you want that? do you really have nothing better to do nowadays?
Yeah, this. Modern life is really good. I'm fascinated by history but wouldn't like to live it, especially if I was a peasant.
>ywn die on the side of the road with diarrhea
Never say never
Who knows what the West will look like in a decade or two...
>angry buzzing noises
>ywn be clean of faeces -- your own and other people's
>ywn feel the post-toothbrushing freshness
>ywn survive a simple infection
True enough, but I bet a single day as a crusader sergeant was more fulfilling than ten years of your life.
found a woman
>crusader sergeant
Holy shit I almost missed this gem
>ywn live in an era where people never wash their hands after wiping their ass barehanded
>ywn be a toothless peasant moron who gets cucked by his liege and dies at 30 of the plague
god damn this modernity baka
You guys realize that peasants could join the military orders too, right? They could even fight in them, although they'd be used as light cavalry, rather than heavy cavalry, and would likely only get chainmail rather than the bigger heavier stuff.
>ywn marry a smallpox-scarred doxy
>ywn watch 9 of your 10 kids die before age 5
>ywn be 5'2" and 130 pounds
>ywn experience the agony of a cavity progressing to an abscess.
>ywn die of a ruptured appendix at 27
why even fucking live bros?
>only chainmail
>knights wore maille
surely you mean in bronze age europe
>gets raped by chad sea raiders
>ywn be an emancipated convict larriking with your mates prospecting for gold in the outback, bashing abos and bantering some wowser poms
You niggas wouldn’t last a week
>you will never be a genetically modified peasant, filling out ecological niches after most life on earth has gone extinct and upper-class humans have left the planet
is there anything dumber than people having nostalgia for times they weren't even alive for
>born in le wrong generation :(
>living in any pre-antibiotic era
No thanks.
Knights were nobility i.e. few and far between. More likely you would be a random peasant or tradesman, end up in the People's Crusade and end up being whipped and assfucked by Abdul and Jamal in the slave markets of Cairo or Damascus.
>ywn be a Roman Infantryman in Caesar's Army
>ywn slaughter gallons of gallic blood
>ywn gain your own farmland after the war
>ywn massacre pompey's traitor army
One can dream.
>ywn be John McPeasantson
>ywn be levied by your Lord, Count Francis Faggotberg the 50th, to fight his expansionist wars
>ywn be used as cannon fodder in battle; equipped with little more than a chainmail shirt (that doesn't really quite fit you) and a shitty spear
>ywn be forced to commit unspeakable atrocities just to survive, because God forbid count Faggotberg pay for the maintenance of his army.
>ywn return to your village after all this, just to find it was razed to the ground months ago.
>ywn have to learn to deal with the resulting ptsd hundreds of years before the emergence of professional psychiatric treatment (not like you could pay for it anyway)
>ywn die of cholera before your 30th birthday after all of this
Why even live?
"Fulfilling" is a subjective idea, Disease and Feces however are not.
>implying you’ll get expensive chainmail
A shitstained gambeson coat is all I’ll spare, John.
>Steppeniggers make their horses fuck you
Kek
>ywn rally behind Augustus, and crush the traitorous dog worshipper Marc Antony
If you were in the Middle Ages you’d just complain that you weren’t living somewhere or sometime else
I thought being covered in mud and feces all the time as a peasant was just a meme. It's hard to imagine anyone with even the slightest access to water, sand or leaves tolerating that for long. I imagine everyone smells like sweat though.
You'd get a padded jacket and a spear. Then get told to soak up arrow fire.
Someday things will change, Faggotberg. No more hunger, no more arbitrary justice, no more fighting in conflicts you don't really understand; looking back with sympathy for all of those who suffer today, you will see.
There's always reenactment, hema, and sca.