Emoroids

What the fuck are you faggots talking about? "A fast for it"? Just fucking fast and it heals. Some people claim to go years without having them after prolonged fasting.

And water doesn't break fast, before some faggot asks.

Bullshit, prove to me water does not have calories, how else does it fuel your body.

I'm waiting.

If you mean Hemorrhoids, then I can speak from experience, since I had hemorrhoids chronically for several years.
They are horribly painful and embarrassing.
I used to try and treat them at first by using preparation H, pushing them back inside and soaking them in hot salt water.
Eventually I realized these traditional methods weren't enough for me. When I went to my doctor, he recommended I get them cut out. So I listened to my doctor and got them surgically removed.
I was not put under. I was given a small amount of local anesthetic. They cut them out and bunt the wound shut with a laser. They gave me no pain medicine, and told me to take some Tylenol when I got home. When I got home the numbing anesthetic began to wear off. I then experienced hours of the worst pain in my life. My asshole was in agony. It felt like someone shove a baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire up my ass and ripped it out. I was unable to work for weeks (I worked construction then). When I came back I was on light duty for a while, cuz my boss was a good dude.
Then the worst thing happened, I got hemorrhoids again the next year. My dad set me up an appointment at this local place with this terrible local advertising.
youtube.com/watch?v=hRGw5uAJBHc
I used to laugh at that commercial. Now I know better.
I went there twice for two procedure, where they carefully deliver laser treatment which somehow cauterizes the blood vessels which feed the hemorrhoids, causing them to swell up. I haven't had hemorrhoids since, even though I now lift way more than I used to.

If you get hemorrhoids I highly reccomend you go to a clinic similar to the one I went to. Here's the website to that place so you can read up and learn more.
mwhtc.com

Don't Suffer in Silence, my friends.
I suffered for way too long. Never agree to surgery, just get the laser treatment.
The lasers aren't even hot or uncomfortable, they're quite cold.

>Emoroids

Thanks. My doctor was recommending surgery but this seems way better.

I thought you all died out long ago

I know this is bait but in case anybody falls for this- your body doesn't actually use water for fuel.

1/10 I responded

let me be as clear as possible:
DO NOT GET THEM CUT OUT
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Find someone to do the infrared laser coagulation treatment. It works and is painless. I'm proof.
The surgery does not work and is agonizing.

I find if I soak regularly in a hot salt bath and always wash my ass after a shit they gradually go away. If I lift heavy after a shit without washing they come back.

>I find if I soak regularly in a hot salt bath
I used to do this, then I got them laser treated.
Now I never get them.

Then why do we need to drink it?

Check mate, I won this battle of wits.

I had the external ones, usually from straining on the toilet. Two things fixed it; change in diet and a bidet.

you wont grow otherwise dingus

I've had them three times in my life. The first when I was 17, and it freaked me the fuck out. I remember asking my parents to examine my butthole because I had no idea what was going on and was terrified. They declined and got me some topical creme instead, which didn't do a thing. They were large and bled since I kept rubbing them because they were itchy and irritated. Thankfully they just ended up subsiding and going away after a week.

The second on third time, I just took it easy. Didn't touch 'em more than I had too, avoid straining on the pot and generally exerting any unnecessary pressure from my core (no lifting, really). They just went away on their own.

If you want to get rid of them in a week do the following:

1. Start taking a fiber suppliment every fucking day - Metimucal 2 times a day works well. Your hard shits helped these fuckers grow.

2. Get ICY HOT Balm and rub a small amount on the hemorrhoid - it will burn like a fuck for a minute but it will take the pain away and help shrink the hemorrhoid.

3. Get bath salts (not the gas station type you mong) and get into the tub. Take a hand full of the salts, get them wet, then slather them all on the hemmroid and in your ass crack and lay in the tub for awhile.

Repeat 2 and 3 throughout the day and it will take a week for them to go away or at least stop hurting. Once they stop hurting the tissue will shrink over a few weeks.

DO NOT POP THEM. DO NOT SQUEEZE THEM. DO NOT CUT THEM OPEN YOURSELF.

If you have a horrificially big one, get the fucker lanced at a hospital and over the next few weeks squeeze out the blood clots till it goes away.

>I remember asking my parents to examine my butthole because I had no idea what was going on and was terrified. They declined

kek