Things normies say that triggers Veeky Forums

>How do I gain weight I'm a girl
100 comments

>How do I gain weight I'm a guy
404

>ugh, broccoli tastes awful

Fucking hate that. Why don't people want to leave humanity behind and become a steroid freak beast?

Any tips for convincing my girl to hope on gear with me?

>“I dont like the taste of water user”
WHAT THE FUCK, FUCK YOU THIS SHIT IS DELICOUS

hey newfag

>I don't want my dick to shrink from whey powder

Its the sign of an untermensh when somebody doesnt drink water.
The most important need the human body has and you dislike it.

>GOMAD

>I don't like water, it's flavorless

Die then.

>Take me to the gym with you. I want to get in shape.
30mins pass at the gym
>How much longer will you be? I'm ready to go.

you successfully triggered me

not sure mate, drives me nuts too. you need to focus on yourself and leaving humanity behind. if the gf doesn’t follow she’s not the one for you dog...

Please don't get your girl on gear. That's fine for males, but females look like unholy abominations on gear. You won't love her anymore if she gets on gear.

This

are you fucking inbred?

>untermensh
user, ich...

>I wanna get toned so I do x functional exercises

>oatmeal tastes like cardboard

>you're handsome

what if he's gay tho.

you have to be kidding me, did someone actually?

>Fine but don't look at me next time you need dating advice nuggetgobbler.

That's not really true, not that I'd ever advice /fruad/ but fucking normies roid just to get to ottermode It's not gonna blow you up unless you work for it too.

>i only like men above 6'2

>traps are gay!

>Please don't get your girl on gear. That's fine for males, but females look like unholy abominations on gear. You won't love her anymore if she gets on gear.

I hate when normies think they understand steroids and will lecture you but they don't have the slightest clue

>tfw women never bother to know you and understand you

Our gift, our disgrace

>Diet soda is good for you user, I like it better than water

They fucking are don't even start with this homo shit user. Cross dressing to get your boy pucci pounded is fucking gay.
Take that shit to /b/ where it fucking belongs

Are they even wrong though? I fucking hate myself most of the time desu.

>i like it when men with penises look like girls
>but not girls that look like girls
its gay

Who even cares if its gay its better than girls

I relate, and that causes me more pain.
Lifting weights gives me a short feeling of satisfaction where I almost feel like a normie

Checked but that gay shit is still degenerate.
Why do you prefer something that looks like something over the real thing itself? That makes no sense user

>tells someone not to have their gf do steroids
>because of how muscular women look not due to the possible health risks involved for a woman specifically
Holy shit user kun why are you such a fucking faggot?

>you have to be kidding me, did someone actually?
Yep
>You know user, they know you won't buy it if your muscles won't grow so they must add some roids to the powder
That guy's been going to gym for 6 months now, haven't got to 1pl8 bench press

Everyone self loathes. The difference is that they voice up their self validation (up to delusional tier) and we put ourselves down.

poo in the loo pajeet

You truly are wise user

>I just did an extra ten minutes of low intensity cardio at the gym today, I sure do deserve this 500 calorie Tiramisu for desert

>Don't lose any more weight, promise me! You are perfect as you are

>I'll just burn it up later in the gym
how r u supposed to burn a thousand calorie food with yoga you fat fucc

Why the fuck do people do this?

>you're so strong and good looking, the girls must be all over you

My GF does this and it bugs the shit out of me

How do I get a sixpack?
I've tried situps

How do I lose this belly fat?
I don't need to lose it anywhere else just my stomach

>>you're so strong and good looking, the girls must be all over you
>when in reality guys are all over you asking how much you lift

Shes scared you become hot and leave her fat ass
>which you rightly should

>my wife called me perfect before I started lifting
>she still calls me perfect when I lift
feels good man but she was lying, I can be even more perfect.

>I do 15 min of cyclette as a warm-up so I don't have train legs

Virtue signalling

She's a really slim chick and i want to give her some muscle and fat, so she's in the state to pump out some kids in a few years
I know i could leave her at anytime and get another chick, but i like this one

>balls dont grow in the gym

Only in America the majority of people don't drink water as their main source of luquids intake

>He doesn't want to fuck this
lel you're faggots, unironically

> i always thought it was gayer to top in gay sex. Because when youre on the bottom you can just pretend its a girls penis.

more like their own insecurities

What's wrong with that? By toned they mean 2/3 ottermode.

This makes me want to show them my enormous testicles fueled with onion

I had a friend, him and his parents drank Pepsi like water. It kind of scared me cos I alway went to his house.
Like nobody in his house is fat.

Water is fucking boring. Drink soda like a real human.

I'm always trying to bring my little bro or my dad, but this happens every time.

Because it’s fucking G A Y. If I walked up to you right fucking now me being a dude you being a dude and you got turned on by that that would be G A Y. It’s no different for fucking TRAPS. Just because it looks like a chick doesn’t mean it is a chick it’s got a dick and that’s G A Y. AND DONT SAY THE DICK MAKES IT CUTER, THAT MAKES IT EVEN GAYER, THAT MAKES YOU GAY BITCH.

It's really fucking weird. I understand that non-relatives say that because of the crab bucket mentality but when a close relative says it? Like my father and my grandma have sacrificed God knows what to succeed enough so that the could procreate and pass their genes forward, then they actively try to sabotage their offspring so that the offspring in question has less of a chance to procreate and pass his/her genes forward? Why the fuck? What's the point?

I dont really think you can be more attracted to someone once the sexual chemistry is there. If lifting makes her more heated that means she started losing it.

>Awww, that's so sweet of you! But I have a boyfriend/I only see you as a friend/I'm not interested in a relationship right now :)
>No thanks, I can't hang out today, I'm staying in with my girlfriend ;)
>user, you you think your friend Chad likes me? :3

things i've heard from gf or fat friends

>30 pound dumbbells are heavy enough
>drinking coke once won't ruin your diet
>beer makes you fat, rum/vodka/whisky doesn't
>you can get shredded just by running
>creatine is all you need
>I'm fat cause i don't exercise, it doesn't have anything to do with the 6,000 calories i consume

>user you're so damn skinny your face bones are showing please eat more
1 month later when I started bulking
>WHAT THE FUCK? DO YOU WANT TO BE OBESE? WHY DO YOU DRINK ALL THIS MILK? LIFTING IS USELESS YOU'RE WASTING YOUR TIME

>beer makes you fat, rum/vodka/whisky doesn't

This is close to true. if you want to get drunk but stay lean hard liquor is the way to go.

"How did you get like that?"

lmao just admit you are gay, only then will you truly realise the true, high test power of fucking boipucci

pin some test on her glutes while she is sleeping, if she wakes up you tell her: "it will be fine honey, well, at least if you don't stop taking testosterone, if you stotp now your system will be fucked for life"
or simply start masturbating to muscle girls and if she loves you she will become one for you

Get off this board and never post here again

...

>I'm so happy

Shut up super-Satan, you tempting fag

t. soyboy

I fucking wish someone would take me under their wing and teach me to do non-machine weights. I wanna get back into it, but always find myself fucking demotivated getting told it's not efficient. Sure, I could reserach and go, but I just know I'm gonna look like a fucking retard. I had a period 5 years ago where I went with friends who were heavily into lifting and it was fucking great lifting with them

>but not in my ass

read starting strength it does a very good job at teaching the basic barbell movements

> be me, be lifting, be at work
> obese manlet approaches
> hurr I see you been liftan
> could you perhaps give me some pointers I wanna get in shape
> tell him to clean his diet, get on a small deficit and do some light cardio like cycling, swimming to reduce some fat first.
> "wow, user I don't wanna become some muscle head freak!"
>mfw

If it's not gay, why remove the penis in the picture?

>Eww vegetables are disgusting.
>Water is terrible for you. Juice is better.
>Insert diet here is better!! In going to start it tomorrow.

Just some of the few things I hear whenever I visit family.

Juice is literally water and fruits. Are you telling me fruit is bad for you? It gives you vitamins not found in water

I really fucking should. Started dieting, following a diet that keeps me full at 1200 kcal, I'm already down 30 ish pounds over the last 6 months and I'm actually happier. I'm more open to talk to people, life is definitely going in the right direction. I want to find the want and need to push myself through the struggle to get a decent body. I'm not sure if I want to go huge yet, but get muscular for sure. I don't want to inhibit movement like some of the huge guys do, but I still don't want to be just skinny. Still got around 50 pounds to go till 170

Jesus fucking christ imagine being such a brainlet.

>I don't even know how much i'm able to plate in bench because i'm in a faggy relationship with dumbbells and PPL, but i'm sure it's more.

Also gives you a shit ton of sugar plus more disgusting shit that comes from shitty ass farms. You wanna drink juice, buy organic.

God these two right here. Every single time. They want to have the results but put absolutely zero effort into it. This happens anytime one of my relatives watches the Kardashians or Dr. Oz.

this
stop making excuses for being fat and unhealthy because youre old

I never said fruit was bad for you at all. I even suggest to them why not just eat a fruit instead. Their response is always the same. "eating them raw is disgusting/doesn't look natural"

>Fatty asks for help
>Provide information you’ve gained over many hard months of trial, error, research and effort
>”Oh wow, yeah I was just thinking doing a 15 minute run once a week or something”

Alright, best of luck with that. I won’t be trying to help you again. IKTF

You want to know the worst part bro? They know the answer. They just ask because they are that oblivious with their own health. My brother is 350 pounds and constantly says he can get back his "fit body" in a month, by only lifting 10 pound weights. I wish I was kidding.