Mire thread

>take off all my clothes

>be at store
>cute cashier says hello to me

Feels good man

Just happened
>making shake in my dorm kitchen
>4 black girls in there talking. Two sneaking looks at me
>as I leave one of them says "bye Ethan" and winks
>"that's not my name" "oooh? What is you're name?"
>proceeds to ask if I'm in the dorm and what room I am in the hall
>leave. Hear them get loud again. Friends giggling at her
>I heard one of them say "buff"

Feels good desu

KEK

>kinda big from lifting
never gonna make it with that attitude
there is no kinda, only small or big

>2017+1

>5'8 (lol)

>only been lifting a year

>not fucking older MILFs and Cougars

...

...

What kind of chump job do you have where you're actually working with women? There isn't a single woman at my job except the office ladies, Women couldn't physically do my job

No gains lanklet detected

>>not fucking older MILFs and Cougars
how

posts like these make me wonder why I ever left fit/
laughs were had

You have already made it brother

>be at cafe
>cashier puts two sugars in my coffee

saved

>got to work
>girl says hello and smiles
DID I MAKE IT?

Got crazily drunk at a pub on Friday night. Chilling near this chick out the back. Some DYEL who knows her is touching her and her handbag intrusively (he is even more drunk). I tell him to fuck off and he stands up and wants to fight. I'm 6'0 and 175lbs, so not big at all, but I'm bigger than this weed. He sits back down realising I'm serious. The guy asks the girl why she would want to talk to me an not him, and she says she thinks I'm 'sweet'. Later another guy tells me she said I looked 'tank', so that sounds like a mire to me. Too bad I had way too much to drink and couldn't be bothered to talk to her. Maybe next time bros

this is the kind of quality content I subscribe for

In order to bang MILFs and Cougars, you just have to remember the trifecta:

>Low self esteem
>Single mother
>Recent divorce/ breakup

All you had to say was something stupid like "i can prove you wrong" with a smile and you could have literally had sex with that woman in 2 minutes. This should be posted in a cringe thread, not a mire thread

>be me
>see self in the mirror
>wink
>get a boner
>mfw

>at work
>walk into common area during break
>group of mostly female colleagues sitting at a table
>they're talking about who they find attractive in work
>one girl says 'I think user is really handsome'
>they notice that I've walked in
>another colleague says 'I think there are two guys called user'
>I say 'yeah my names user'
>they burst out laughing
>'lmao this is so awkward hahaha we were talking about the other user sorry'
>'y-yeah I know heh'
>sit down alone as far away as possible
>the other user is really handsome but he's like 5'7 so there's no way they were talking about him

Feels good brahs

Is there a saying about young bulls?

>In crowded public transport
>Girl steps on my shoe and says sorry
Goodbyeeee fuckers

>cute chick
>ay yo, can i get your number?
>why?
made it

black girls are so forward, i love it
too bad im not attracted to them, but they make for good bros

That's rape user #metoo

They are better than wrinkledicks

I feel like when I fix my hair a certain way I catch women looking at me

He's a delusional

>hate taking shits in public restrooms, that's where your are most vulnerable
Autism
>get in the stall take off all my clothes
Autism
>wipe ass no shit just a little blood
You might have hemorrhoids

>at gym working out
>doing squats
>chad walks in during my rest and starts OHP'ing my barbell
>I walk up to him and yell "milk truck just arrive"
>Chad praises me for not splerging out
>stacy comes over and lets me sniff her brap
feelsgoodman

Don't have to be attracted to them to stick it in them.

Anyone notice they get more free shit after getting in shape?

The other day I went to go get food and realized I forgot my wallet when I went to pay. The girl behind the counter looked at me for a second and told me to just take it.

Picked up lunch for the office the last week and someone wanted to add a drink at the last minute. Girl at that place gave me two and wouldn't let me pay for it.

KEK'D LOUD

>Be me
>6’3” 195lbs Slowly on the road to making it
>Been lifting 2 years
>Out shopping
>There’s a VR demo booth outside the game store
>QT need girl approaches me and asks if I wanna try it
>I absolutely do
>The VR has loads of demos to try but I only get 10 minutes
>Play a space shooter game
>Pretty cool
>Got a few minutes left, pick the beach simulation
>Get immersed in the simulation of being on a beach with bikini babes all around
>Start flexing my ceps
>Striking poses
>tfw no virtual mires cause it’s just a video
>take off goggles and everyone’s looking at me
>Occulusly they were mirin
>Strut away without saying thanks

>Occulusly
I cracked a smile

>take off all my clothes
though I was the only one

>go to college for exam
>Its pretty early on a Saturday but it's a senior exam in a very specific subject so not that many people take it. So its not that uncommon
>Most of the building is in the dark
>Go downstairs to dark corridor
>Smell something nasty
>Stupid chemists fucked something up again
>As i walk right in front of the door where I'm suppose to take my exam
>A FUCKING PEACE OF SHIT
>RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE GOD DAMN DOOR
>AND ITS FRESH
>professor walks out
>I steps in it
>Looks at me
>"Did you do this?"
>"N-no?"
>"Goes back inside"
>Mi sides leave the building
>"Tells me to come back next week exams canceled"

I don't know who did it, but thanks man. Mirin your balls

Epic. Put me in the screencap, bros!!!

...

you tried

>Walk past a girl on the street
so this is how it feels to make it

How is this a mire story

They literally were talking about the other one.

This story doesn't make any sense. Why do you have to bring the card reader to work? Shouldn't they stay at the place of business? What the fuck is your job

>go to timmies
>early in morning, not many people there
>good looking older blonde lady working the cash
>turns out she's eastern Euro
>as soon as I walk in she tells the other woman working to look at the handsome young man
>get big grin on my face, she compliments my smile
>order a coffee
>asks me what I do that I need to be up so early
>tell her private investigator
>NiagaraFalls.mp3 between her legs
>gives me free danish and winks at me
>tells me to "go get em"
She was old enough to be my mom but damn do I love milf mires

>insecurity: the post

Because most of these are shit.

>go to class
>see prof class on me
Made it

LMAO

Tell her you want to investigate her privates.

> at the gymnasium
> I'm calm lifting my dumbbells, in my fart well.
> I'm finishing giving him hard after a long day
> I get pulled by triceps.
> I can not find the pod that I need
> Friend of the gym tells me that he is using it on a machine that is behind
> I'm going to look for the pussy
> A pretty cute girl sees me
> "That rope is using a guy there"
> She tells me this in a flirtatious attitude and with the eyes of I want to take you
> H-haha quiet guy is my friend, I'm clear of the fart.
> I see her seeing me when I return to the machine she was using

> I get pulled by triceps.
> I can not find the pod that I need
> Friend of the gym tells me that he is using it on a machine that is behind
> I'm going to look for the pussy

What the fuck language is this

What the fuck are you trying to say?

I think it's trying to communicate

>head to the rack for some squats
>some fat chick doing australians in the smith machine
>leaves to go do something else as i warm up
>load up lmao2.5pl8
>pull up my pants
>do squats
>look in the mirror
>same chick is back in the smith machine
>doing more australians
>turn around
>see her rapidly look in another direction
>do this again after my next set
>bitch is still doing australians
>end up doing extra sets just to see her try to sneak more mires

>go get em
If only she knew that what you do doesn't really involve "getting" anybody.

the fart is that without google translate I can not write the pods I want to say in English

What's your original language lmao

I'm sure someone can help you out with this

It must have been a real bad shit if you had to remove all of your clothes

kek just spat out oats onto my screen

I just turned 27, and haven't actively browsed Veeky Forums since I was 20-23, but the effort I put into working out during that time is paying off now that things have slowed down a bit with work and responsibilities.

>Girls and women at work smile and blush at me
>Girls stare at me on the train to work
>Cashiers and baristas smile and blush everyday
>I get hit on like crazy whenever I go out with friends
>Try to maintain friendships with girls from my old university, but their boyfriends are incredibly jealous and concerned

>Most of this is not because of my body
>Grooming, dressing right, studying, having ambitions, getting frequent haircuts, reading, landing a good job and having a good face is actually the reason.

Leaving Veeky Forums for a long time was actually the best thing I ever did. Fun to be back tho

>walking down street feeling confident
>cute girl walking towards me
>lock eyes
>she smiles
>smile back
>she stops in front of me
>"hey, how are you doing?"
>oh shit it's happening, this is not a drill
>"you knows those annoying people who both people on the street about donating to charities?"
>produces clipboard from out of nowhere
>die inside
>politely decline and walk off

Starting to understand why everybody hates women. She was clearly purposefully misleading me to start a conversation and then guilt me into donating.

why you back brah?

...

...

I got a better job, but it's requiring a bit more effort now in the beginning. Evenings during weekdays are too short now to be social. So I browse Veeky Forums for shits and giggles. Also excellent fap material while I cut back on porn.

Pretty sure my gym crush turned her head to look at me yesterday but I couldn't tell for sure because I wear glasses and have no peripheral vision. I may have caught her looking at me before but it's hard to tell if I'm looking at her or if she's looking at me. I should talk to her but I don't know how to talk to strangers very well. It'd be awkward as fuck for sure.

>be at work
>customer walks in
>she tells me she is embarrassed
>ask why
>she’s looking for a selfie stick

Girls only get embarrassed when they think you’re hot right?

>walking down street feeling confident
>cute girl walking towards me
>lock eyes
>she smiles
>smile back
>she stops in front of me
>"hey, how are you doing?"
>oh shit it's happening, this is not a drill
>"you knows those annoying people who both people on the street about saving your soul?"
>Oh nice, it's not one of those.
>"Well, I was born again 2 years ago and before that I was sucking and fucking every guy I could while shooting up heroin during my freshmen year of college. etc."
>Damn, should've gotten here over two years ago
>die inside
>start autistically screeching

>not offering to be her stick

Alpha

Yea, I’m thinking he’s back.

yfw

I came across one but missed my shot cause I took to long. This girl was even making dirty jokes around me but when my dumbass finally asked her out she was on some other guys dick. FML. She was a hot little slut too.

Are you the protagonist of this comic

user I think you may need some assistance with posting

wat

>eating in fast food restaurant alone
>3 girls sitting at the next table
>2 of them face me, 1 sits with her back at me
>2 girls keep looking and smiling at me while they talk with each other
>3rd girl is flipping chairs so she can see me better
>smiling and looking all the time
>1 of them turned red when i keeped eye contact and smiling back

i was afraid that they rape me the moment i had to walk past their table.

another story
>be at party
>one women is flirting with me all the time
>she wants the D
>1 hour later i heard that her boyfriend was watching us flirting the whole time
>she didn't even mentioned that she is in a relationship

i didn't fucked her because of principle, i don't fuck women the same day i meet them the first time. she grabbed me everywhere when we were dancing. feels good that she totally forgot her boyfriend around me.

>role playing dungeons & dragons with my 5 other friends
>I get the role of small wizard
>actually swole as fuck
>2 girls there say I don't deserve that role because im too big for it
>one girl starts playing footsie with me under the table
>get boner
>lead her hand to my boner
>she starts feeling my cock up all the while acting like nothings going on
>after finishing hanging out with friends, we go back to my car and she sucks my dick
>she then lies down and tells me to fuck her
>im about to cum while fucking her, she tells me to get off and quickly puts my cock in her mouth as im cumming.
>swallows all of my cum and says "see you next week"

>get in the stall take off all my clothes and sit down
My nigger

Silly cuck--i mean canuck

nice larp

DELET THIS

>walk on gym
>receptionist tells me that i have to renew my subscription
See you later, guys

They're also really good at destroying society and spreading disease.

>Being this obsessed
Pathetic

>you could be getting mired by black chicks but instead you /pol/post on a homosexual bodybuilding forum

Can't you read? He was playing tabletop, not LARP.