How do I get rid of haemarroids fit?
you have to tell your doctor, and she'll take a needle and poke them, which deflates them. its embarrassing but they do it a hundred times.
wash your ass degenerate
I've always had low level ones that went away with either PrepH wipes or the PrepH ointment. Been eating a shit ton of fiber lately though and haven't seen any hemmoroids in like a week despite not changing my shitting habits.
Shove ice cubes up your ass. The cold makes them "cramp up" and return to their rightful place.
Vitamin E straight to the bunghole
More fiber, more water.
eat enough fiber, drink enough water
don't sit on the toilet for too long
don't push it out, relax and let it go easy
enjoy you shit gains
>don't push it out
Kinda hard not to when it's the size of a soda can
You know what else is hard and the size of a soda can?
Colosal bs.
That just means you are constipated because of your diet, fix your diet and then focus on the other parts
My hemorrhoids these past weeks have been bleeding worse than a female with menstruations....
Like at least once a week.
You might have arsed cancer or a fissure. Go get checked. Serious.
Also you will know when you have to take a shit because you will feel an urge just like when you need to take a piss
Going to the toilet without that urge is asking for hemorrhoids because you're going to spend a lot of time and you will end up trying to force it out
Stop doing squats. I only get them when I do them then they go away if I stop
>have heemrroids from lifting
>been watching a bunch of gape porn for testo boost
>piques interest
>lube up a carrot and go to town on my bunghole
>feels weird.wav
>all mighty pain
>bleeding like fuck
>oh shit oh shit this is how I die?
>pack tissue up my ass and pray to God
>next morning still bleeding
>go to doctors
>"user, you have a fissure"
>"do you partake in anal sex or stimulation?"
>"n-no I'm bulking so my shits are big"
>he buys it, stitches me up and tells me to go easy in the gym
never again anons, I have a new found respect for proxy paige though
get a squatty potty for nice easy shits and get your boyfriend to kiss it clean
he knows
user, i...
How the fuck did you manage that, were you deliberately trying to perforate your colon or some shit?
no i think he believed me
i dont know, im not a faggot so i dont have much experience in how to fuck my ass
An ass doctor knows whats up, bro. He didn't want to embsrass you. Its OK, don't rip your shit again.
>im not a faggot
The evidence suggests otherwise
I thought fissure was just a pokemon move wtf.
Approach pharmacist
Ask for Almiflon 60 or equivalent
Take that for a week
Done
A beer can
Baby diaper cream, you're welcome.
I tried to do this once
Glad I never succeed, I hear it makes you bleed like a motherfucker
When I was a kid I used to get bad constipation and hueg shits all the time because I didn't drink enough water.
Pretty sure when my doctor saw my torn up asshole he thought I was being raped by my father.
I had them a while ago. While it was the most unpleasant thing ever (sligthest strain of lower body would cause pain), the doctor told me they were common (especially since you are a heavy lifter). He perscribed me some cream.
The pain was there for like 10 days, but the lump stayed for like a month ...
>Pretty sure when my doctor saw my torn up asshole he thought I was being raped by my father.
jej
Kek'd
If there's red in your poo, more fiber for you!
Same problem, and the area just above myself ass hole is sensitive atm too. Stupid butt. Just work pls
RIGHT
I got hemarroids in the third world and ended up fucked off my face on tramadol to deal with the pain, getting shot at multiple times while high as a kite unable to keep my eye open or stand nevermind return fire, and when they eventually got me to a hospital, I was fucking ASS BLASTED by this massive arab "doctor" who 'wanted to see if hurt'. NO FUCKING SHIT
DO NOT LET THEM GET TO STAGE FOUR
THAT IS SURGERY
AND SOME QT ARAB PHARMACIST WILL WALK BUT FOR NO FUCKING REASON WHILE YOUR UP IN STIRRUPS ABOUT TO GET FUCKED WITH SCALPELS
So here is my advice:
Squat while you shit
Fix your diet ASAP
Wash your arse with water, not TP
Don't get lazy
Squat while you shit
Prep H that shit
Wash your arse with water, not TP
Some toilet bowels will not handle the weight of an unsupported squatter, spread your weight out onto surfaces, failing that sit but lift a leg up to your chest
It's been 5 months and my ass still bleeds when I shit
Fiber/prebiotic
A good probiotic
And a clean diet full of fruit and veg
And maybe some enzymes
fuck man, this can be me very soon. good luck, you will make it.
>AND SOME QT ARAB PHARMACIST WILL WALK BUT FOR NO FUCKING REASON WHILE YOUR UP IN STIRRUPS ABOUT TO GET FUCKED WITH SCALPELS
Whut?
Walk -> Work?
Do they really cut you up while you're awake? Holy shit
Lots of fiber, lots of water, and when you wake up in the morning lube up your asshole so your first dry morning shit doesn't aggravate them.
*Walk by
In the operating theatre, I have no fucking idea why.
She just casually strolled by looking fine as fuck in a mask while staring at my cold, nervous, unwashed for 2 months, dick and balls, plus my horrifically swollen and shit covered arsehole (couldn't clean properly due to pain), with a years worth of unshaven pubes all over the place
I assume she was delivering the Ketamine they used to knock me out but why she was still there idk
When I woke up that was the end of the pain meds and they gave me whole foods. Had to shit bricks for days after the surgery and immediately after had to soak in a bowl of warm water to get the gauze out. Probably what caused all my problems, now my arsehole is more of an arse jaggedy crack, and there's this pocket in my left cheek/crack that fills up with blood after any exercise, even walking.
Sorry for the blog posts, need a rant.
Spas, heval
Where did this happen???? Were the doctors good at least?
Syria, acquired piles in Raqqah, had surgery in Serekanie hospital.
Had great food and super cute nurses and trainee paramedics tho
No shit they cooked chicken JUST like KFC but without all the fat, grease, and soggyness, spices were on point, over all: 5/7, would reccomend
Are you one of those crazy guys who went to fight there by themselves or are you enlisted??
Kek
My doctor told me they can be caused/aggravated by alcohol, spicy foods, and lack of vegetables.