Usual saturday afternoon d&d at user's place

I don't think that's healthy, user.

Mein gott, story please.

Story

>it's an user doesn't deliver episode

...

>Tell mom week in advance that im gonna be busy doing a session on a specific day
>She chooses that exact day to spring everything that ever needed done onto me
Every FUCKING time. JUST TELL ME TO DO THAT SHIT EARLIER IN THE WEEK. OR, GOD FORBID, WHEN IM NOT ALREADY IN THE SESSION.

Anyways, that was only when i was younger, these days she tries to respect my game days.

Did u fuk?

>be GM'ing a d&d game with my bros in the basement
>My sis comes home with her boyfriend
>They don't hear us because we were currently looking up stuff in silence
>We have left the door down to the basement open for fresh air
>They start watching some indiana jones movie
>I'm not really bothered that much by the music, so I don't close the door
>bigmistake.jpeg
>About half an hour or so later they start having sex in the couch (presumably)
>Audible moans and sloppy wet sounds
>Things start to get really uncomfortable at the table, really fast
>We all know this cannot possibly originate from the movie, because we have seen it
>I freak out and TPK the party to end the session prematurely
>They all sneak out in a weird state of disbelief from the basement, I'm pretty sure some of them tried to look too
>Next day I expected them to be angry at me
>"Best game ever, user, too bad about my PC tho."
>theyallfappedthatnight.jpeg
I did too

Well I can say the most uncomfortable time, sure. It's not just this once though.

>In game we're playing mother/daughter characters, as in real life
>Elf and half-elf respectively
>She's a bard and not outwardly promiscuous but a can't say no sort, a detail which strains our relationship
>Gets approached relatively platonically by a suave but tragic human noble guy, but she puts no stop to it and they end up romantically entwined
>Try to grit my teeth and play through it, though with him as a benefactor and quest giver, as well as mom being close with him means I have to spend time around him too, and he starts to make moves on me as well
>Hope that it's the chance to get mom to break with him and tell her about his infidelity
>She says she knows and that they both agreed on it and were open to the idea, and furthermore that while it may have begun with him being with the both of us separately, eventually the plan was for him to be with the both of us together
>For her motivation, it was a chance to become closer with me and to help my character loosen up so to speak and be more easygoing, as well as that he'd make a good husband for my character considering she'd already seen what he had to offer and vetted him
>She actually in-character said to my character, that she should get more in touch with her human side

I think one of the reasons she did it was to make up for a previous game where she stole my character's husband in that game, but it just came off really uncomfortable and creepy.

Where does the ERP element come into it?

GOOD THREAD

>Awkward domestic moments
When your white friend swears to hit parents face.

Like holy fucking shit, do white parents not hit their children?

In that situation, she'd be ERPing with the DM about her character and the guy together, and my character would happen upon it or be nearby. Eventually she started trying to pressure my character into it with some pretty uncomfortable acts/displays.

ahh, I thought you meant she was just encouraging your character to flirt with an NPC.

Details

Like her character o lt did it, or did she act some shit out irl

It's kind of hard to.

I remember laughing at my parents when they tried to hit me at 6. They sort of gave up at that point and started the while grounding thing.

She was, but it progressed from there to trying to lure her into a threesome.

She spoke/described/acted some of it out back and forth with the DM and me. With him she talked about and described what went on between her and the NPC. With me she did the same but also got uncomfortably touchy-feely as a means of physically acting out roleplay.

Hot, what did you get her for mother's day?

Hawt

Flowers and a sort of keychain she'd been looking for, and we went out to dinner and spent some nice time together at home.

That's awesome dude.

Mine did, but I'm half-slav and thus technically not white (even though I totally look the part), so it probably doesn't count.

I'd get hit plenty if I was being a little shit. Grew up poor and in a shitty-ish neighborhood though, so I didn't know if that had anything to do with it.

It did

thanks doc?

>Slavs
>European
>not white

That's like saying Greeks, Italians, and Celts of all stripes (Insular and Continental, so including any Bretons, Britons, Welsh, Scots, Irish, and Gauls) aren't white.

Does /pol/ know anything?

> Greek

If you count continentals you might as well count armenians, romanis, Stanis, uzbeki, tartars, and montenegrans

If I'm being honest, I once played with her tits a bit while she was asleep, and even licked them, but that was the extent.

>asleep

How old were you?

About fifteen or sixteen, I think. It's a bit hard to remember time, only the events are clear.

Because when I see a ton of Hispanics and blacks in jail and murdering each other on the street, I think "Their parents didn't beat them enough."

You're fucking sick.

Awesome user

It was pretty exciting, yeah
Pierced nips and belly ring, too

Fuck thats nice. You lucky dog

>mfw this thread

My parents never hot me, besides light spankings when I was a toddler. My punishments are just getting yelled at, because they know the feeling of guilt really eats at me and that it's punishment enough usually.

I'm a motherlover, you're a motherlover
We should fuck our own mothers

No, we shouldn't.

What does you mom look like, user?
Is she single?

wtf is up with your mom user?

She's always been a little weird, flirty, and perhaps inappropriately close with me.

more to the point wtf is up with this thread.

Have you considered asking her why?

Dude, you have to make a move of some kind,

Indirectly. She says she loves me very much and cares about me the most of her kids, since my brothers are "normal" so she thinks I need more care and comfort or something like that. She still treats me like her little princess.

Why? I'm not gay and not into incest.

Oh hai there

>Not gay
I don't really believe you. You're on Veeky Forums.

fuck off pusguzzler

>Playing a pretty gritty and somewhat serious game of 3.5 with friends a few years ago over Skype
>DMing
>Mom just comes up stairs, takes a seat behind me and stares at the back of my head
>Turn around to ask what she needed
>Says nothing and gestures to keep going
>Spend the next thirty minutes getting stared at from behind
>Break into a cold sweat and voice strains not knowing what she wants or what she'll do
>She's eventually satisfied and leaves
>Next day there's a WW2 bayonet sitting on the bottom step

I still don't understand what was up with that.

She probably wanted to play too.

That was a warning. You were not talking with any girls that could steal you away, right?

Try to find a dnd game to play with your mom, user. She wants to play

Hit, thrown, strapped, slammed... it's fair to say white smackery happens.

It's harder to do now, though, as white communities are full of judgemental, overzealous busybodies. Not that I want to thrash my kids but a quick pop on the ass has its uses.

I tried to get her to play Mario once when I was a kid. She told my dumb kid self it was stupid and pointless.

I doubt she'd be down for DnD.

No! Never!

People change, user. She set a trap on the stairs for you. She might be DM material.

Offer anyways man

What the fuck?
>Ctrl+mother = 5
>Ctrl+mom = 16

Yeah, I don't get it either.

Then again my mother and I spent a long while on less than optimal terms.

>Greeks
>white

t. ahmed

tg has revealed that the majority of them live with their mothers and want to fuck them.

Yeah I never really got along with my mom. Although that has more to do with her being the kind of person who eats a sandwich in front of a homeless dude.

You seem to be implying that Greeks and Turks don't still hate each other to this day.

>Turks living in Greece hate Turks living in Anatolia

Fixed that for you.

Would you call your mother a violent woman?

My thoughts exactly
>doesn't realize his mom doesn't want to fuck him
>wants to duck his mom
Is mom biological? Let's get our facts straight here

bumping

>living with your parents
Must be 18 to browse Veeky Forums kiddo

> Mom hopes she can connect with you in-game and show you how to have a real relationship.

> Has lowered her standards to accept your GM.

> Is concerned you'll be forever alone and cries at night about what will happen when she's gone.

> Feels guilty you inherited her autism with interpersonal relationships.

>not living at home while going to your local CC for two years with free tuition then transferring to a major Uni

Genetically the people inhabiting moder day Turkey have little to nothing to do with the Turks of the steppes. Their genetic makeup is, in fact, more or less exactly the same as when Anatolia was part of Greece. Modern Turks are simply Greeks who converted to Islam.

>playing D&D on a summer afternoon
>we're like 16
>Dude I stab him lmao
>friend's dad comes in in a speedo
>massive cock outline
>"oh dude D&D cool lmao"
>he DMs an old 2E ravenloft campaign for the rest of the night
>feeds us steaks from his own slaughterhouse
>can't get his cock off my mind

>>She says she knows and that they both agreed on it and were open to the idea, and furthermore that while it may have begun with him being with the both of us separately, eventually the plan was for him to be with the both of us together

I'm gonna need your mother's phone number right the fuck now.

It's a meme you dip

Sure user, it's 555-1212, her address is 123 Fake Street, Neverhappened, NJ.

I, too, would suck a massive cock for a GM like that.

>can't just end the session for the week without dramatic TPK

Mine did a couple of times when I almost killed myself as a child, though my dad grew up in a Mennonite farming community.
what bothered me more is when they say they are disappointed in me. which sucks when you are a really good kid.