Why would you loot armor off a fallen foe? It obviously didn't do shit for them

>Fair warning: He shit his pants when I killed him

Just sell it to a tanner, means the hide's halfway ready to making leather.

God, Veeky Forums doesn't know opportunity when it stares them in the face.

Knights regularly shittied in their armor during combat.

The squire had to clean it later, using sand.

At some point, you became a knight only so you could inflict it on someone else. Never understimate the power of pettiness.

>man, when I get knighted, I'm going to shit in my armor just for fun so some other dumbass has to clean it

Orc shit is a perfectly useful alchemical ingredient.

I prefer elf poop.
Elves tend to be vegetarians, but they don't eat a lot of garlic either. Their feces is almost odor-less in comparison.

>am dwarf
>dwarves are really rare
>all armor/clothes we loot are human sized

It's important to have goals, user.

His poor squire is going to be down in the dumps about it, though.

>Fair warning: He shit his pants when I killed him"
Humans in my setting have developed a simple procedure for removing fecal matter from clothes and armor. They call it "washing" and it's pretty effective.

Can you share your house rules about that?
Is it a dex based skill or wis?

Because unless you destroyed the armour with a mass weapon like a warhammer or axe, you most likely killed the man but hitting him somewhere unarmoured or in a gap. That shit has resale value and practical use.

>we know almost nothing about about foot soldier armor style and quality.

Except we DO know, as it was written down. There are thousands of ledgers for every century of mass armour requesteurs and issuance for militia, levees and layman soldiers. The raw fact of it is that for most of history, the vast majority of laymen used quilted textile defenses, which don't survive time well. There are literally thousands of pieces of munitions harness in various museum's storage, but until the past few decades, no one was interested in seeing the "plain" stuff.

>That shit got recycled forever until mass scale mining technology became common place.

Not anywhere like you think. Even today, with our modern blast furnaces, reclaiming raw material metal from finished manufacture is a pig, much less in preindustrial metallurgy. Typically, old armour was either stored (Unless the Victorians scrapped it, which is a HUGE problem), distributed to secondary usage (Such as sending the plethora of maille shirts cluttering the Royal Armouries to colonial soldiers in the 16th/17thC as it worked just fine against native arrows), or sold to poorer nations (Ireland, Scotland, etc).

Not any more than any other soldier. Its common practice by way of manuals of arms to induce a BM before donning harness. Like taking a pregame or prepatrol shit as an athlete or modern soldier.

>Bash head of some frisian richling through luck and concentration
>he had armor of Milan masters, bestest in Europe and SWAG as fuck
>leave it 'cuz "lol it didn't work for him" instead of fixing helmet and wearing
>become known as imbecile

there was a hole

>They call it "washing" and it's pretty effective.

You can wash a public restroom, user. Doesn't mean it isn't disgusting cleaning up other peoples taco bell remains.

>destroyed the armour with a mass weapon like a[] axe
Real battle exes don't look like WoW axes, you know.

Ah... Such a great character. Criminally underused. I really did enjoy what content there was for him though.

Yes, I know. They don't need to. I think you woefully underestimate the amount of damage both the face, and the spike or back hammer of a medieval war axe can do to plate armour.

Ah, sorry, for some reason I was envisioning the older style big-bladed viking weapon and forgot about the more compact modern weapon.

Hey Gropes! Why are you up?

Clownfriend works in museums and does IRL steel fighting if you don't know him. He knows his stuff.

It doesn't take much to fuck up someone's day.

Scrap value?

Can't sleep. Working on an xmas gift in the meantime.

Not a big deal. In modern warfare, it's not uncommon to salvage damaged vehicles, rinse the gore out with a hose, and put a new crew in it.

The driver's seat was the worst. That's where most of the explosive force of mines tended to be directed. They're called hellholes for this reason. So many drivers over the years have slept in the same space another man was horrifically killed.

Why would you loot anything from anything? It obviously didn't do anything for whoever previously owned it.

DON'T STEP ON ME
OR SPILL WATER ON ME

Well, I wouldn't. I mean, he just fell. He might get up again. Best to kill him first.

The crucial part is saturating the soiled article with reasonably clean water, which serves to hydrolyze the contaminants, separating them from the garment, and making the remainder easy to disperse via repeated scrubbing and rinsing. Apart from survival checks to gather water in wilderness, this generally does not require a skill roll. Soap may also be employed to ease the process and further reduce the smell, but it is not strictly necessary. This generally takes about 20 minutes.

Depending on the item being washed, it takes varying amounts of water in a bucket (1-3 gallons is a safe bet for multiple items). Characters can also do it just fine at a good water-source, such as a lake, well, water pump, stream, or river.

A standing water-source smaller than a large pond will quickly become unsafe to drink if used for washing (cumulative 5% disease chance for each item washed in it; 15% for articles contaminated by blood or feces), although a stream or river will simply push the removed detritus downstream. For this reason, containers such as buckets are often employed to avoid contamination.

After the washing process, clothes must be exposed to heat and air to dry before being comfortably worn again. Leaving an item out in the sun takes about 5 hours in hot environs, 1 day in temperate, 2 days in colder climates. They can be set near large fires to further reduce the time to dry. Items made entirely of non-fabric materials can be dried in about a minute or less using a dry cloth or towel.

oh shit guys we have cosplaying expert here. he's unstoppable with his knowledge on how to make foam weapons

Ok ok, cut the fluff. I need to know what to roll. Are there advantages? And material components?

Be quick, the world and a handful of planes depend on my ability to rinse two centuries worth of dirt out of a sleeping lich's bone inscriptions.

...

>devoting 3 pages of your RPG rulebook to the details of how to wash various things, table sof different soaps and cleaning agents included
>meanwhile the wizard can just use Prestidigitation to clean items
>CASTER SUPREMACY

Ok ok, cut the fluff. I need to know what to roll. Are there advantages? And material components?

Be quick, the world and a handful of planes depend on my ability to rinse two centuries worth of dirt out of a hobo lich's bone inscriptions.

I swear, some of the shit on him must be from extinct species.

...

No, for real. Gropey does LARP, but he also works with armor and weapons for museums and fights Battle of Nations. Are you new?

...

>reclaiming raw material metal from finished manufacture is a pi
Not so much recycled as in 'melted down' so much as 'hammered back into shape, holes patched, and sold onto some other fucker about the same size'.

Let's say you go to war against another industrialized nation, but for some reason you could steal the house of whoever you kill. Wouldn't you do that?

In medieval times, proportionally speaking a good suit of modern armor was worth about as much as a house is today. Even if the armor itself is no longer of any use, simply by selling it you cuold turn from a poor peasant into a very wealthy man. That's one of the reasons why so many non-nobles ended up becoming soldiers during the Late Middle Ages (supplanting the old nobility and forming standing armies): the pay was okay, but the loot was were the big bucks were.

Also as somebody who's had to buy mostly second-hand armor besides a helmet to save a buck for getting into fighting, you'd be surprised how much shit will fit you if the person was of roughly similar size. Torso armor that is belted/strapped to your body works well, such as coats of plate or hauberks, and plate limbs tend to fit alright. Tassets fit anybody.

It's mostly legs that are a pain if they don't fit right.

Depends on the part of the leg, it's mainly the joints that suck if they're the wrong size. If cuisses aren't the proper size, then they're either too large and end up covering most of your leg (hurrah!) or are too small but still easily wrap around. But if the kneecop's too small you're kinda fucked.

Funny that you ask that.
For some strange reason I recently developed an aversion to looting thing in video games.
I see it now as disrespectful for the dead and basically stealing.
It's also unhygienic and dirty and in some way you take the negative energies from the enemy when you use his things.

Also I believe that when you steal from a dead body he/she enters the afterlife unarmed and unarmored, and this isn't fair even for enemies.
and it's even worse when looting from civilians on fallen allies.

The only thing I can loot now are drops from creatures and things I find in chests, but I find a chest near a dead body I don't loot it because it feels like stealing from that guy.

How do you deal with the dangers of rust?

>Also I believe that when you steal from a dead body he/she enters the afterlife unarmed and unarmored, and this isn't fair even for enemies.
What God does your character pray to?

> chest near a dead body I don't loot it because it feels like stealing from that guy
Why would the owner of the contents be dead near the chest? It was likely a looter killed by traps or the owner.

Greaves too. Greaves that are the wrong size will slip down and then rub at the top of your foot or the back of your ankle which is guaranteed to give you a bad day

Nigga it's called floating armor for a reason.

>not claiming it as trophies from foes youve slain
you disappoint me Veeky Forums

Do you have any idea how tedious it would be to maintain all the various sets of armor you run across during your time as a murderhobo?

It's not about the religion of my character, it's a kooky idea I got from hearing that vikings have to die with the weapon in their hands to enter Valhalla.
I know may not be accurate but the concept got stuck in my head.

Sometimes these chest or bags are in a house or a camp near dead people like in Grim Dawn

>It's not about the religion of my character
But it should be.
>it's a kooky idea I got from hearing that vikings have to die with the weapon in their hands to enter Valhalla.
So it's about your personal adherence to Nordic faith. That's OOC.

I AM FIRE
I AM DEATH
PLEASE DONT STEP ON ME

As tedious as getting a bag of holding and spacious residence to display them.

Also, one assumes you save such an honor for the significant opponents.

Sorry read that wrong and didn't address the issue. Not sure how hard it is to maintain armor after the initial cleaning, if you are just going to display it. Saving it for nice looking sets should mollify it regardless, however.

>the head of his axe is an actual crowbar
Fucking brutal

thats a waste of a spell slot though

>It obviously didn't do shit for them

But I know that this armour did help my opponent. I know what it takes to kill an unarmoured man. I know how much harder it was to kill him. Thus I know how much his armour helped him.

Sure, it didn't help him as much as he would have liked. It will probably help me more because, unlike him, I know where the weak spots are.