/ccg/ Custom Card General /cct/

On lunch from classes, so I'll dump what I've made progress on since the last thread. It includes a thoroughly-revamped group of red commons and a newly-finished group of green commons. Currently working on the multicolored commons for the set.
That amount of self-synergy feels heavy handed. I'm on board with both abilities, but having them on the same card feels almost tacky.

And the green.
I like your concept, but I agree that you're overcomplicating it a bit. Keep the meat of the effect but streamline the design and I think you'll end up with something simple, effective, and pretty cool.

Holy hell, dead thread yet again. I suppose I'll post one-offs to keep this thing afloat for a bit.

IMO the CMC is too high for the effect

How would I word an effect that takes place if a certain other card is not also in play?

It's comparable to both Homicidal Seclusion and Deadly Wanderings.
Cards that have effects based on specific other cards reference "a card (or card type, such as creature) named X."

Like this, then?

Close. "Put" instead of "place" in regards to putting it onto the battlefield. Also, take a look at Marauding Maulhorn; it'll help you clean up that second card.

Nice, thanks for the help.

Also, multiple keywords in a line aren't all capitalized. Additionally, trample and reach are mechanically counterintuitive; one is purely an offensive keyword, while to use the other one must keep the creature back to block. Designs that work against themselves in such a manner aren't good practice. I'd suggest switching up your keyword choice.

Mal Duncan, Herald. Any of you who've seen Teen Titans might remember this guy. He's the one with the trumpet, that they used to put the Brain's bomb into space. Interesting concept, this is my attempt at translating it to Magic. Feels kinda sparse to me, but I'm trying to get over my Complexity Addiction, so I didn't add anything else.

>Colin
Well, the other idea was to give it the Fungusaur ability, but then I thought it just brought up the same problem I keep running into of designing a creature that discourages being blocked so much that it may as well read
>~ can't be blocked.

I will go through your cards in a bit.

Yikes. The loner mechanic from AVR was not well-liked. To put it in perspective, this article

magic.wizards.com/en/articles/archive/making-magic/chasing-shadows-part-1-2016-03-14

says that, out of the named mechanics, Fateful Hour was the most disliked, and the loner mechanic was liked even less than that. With the name of the card, I feel like it would be far better if it were a nonpermanent. The art makes me think Wrath too.

No, you don't say "do not control", instead make it "unless you control" and word it differently. There's actually precedence for this exact ability from Marauding Maulhorn, which I will alter and give to you now
>~ attacks each combat if able unless you control a creature named [creature name].
With ~ being a stand-in for the name of the card on which the ability is printed, and [creature name] being a stand-in for the relevant creature. Also, Wizards likes to say "each combat if able" now, due to working differently and being unintuitive if there are multiple combat phases in a turn. Also also, you should update your frames.

That's true. I was attempting to keep the flavor intact (Kastellan robots must be constantly reprogrammed by datasmiths or they will just keep doing the last thing they were programmed to do). Do you have any suggestions to replace reach with, or should I just remove it and have trample be their only keyword?

>8/11 worth of stats
>Completely shuts down blocking
>2RW
No.

Man, this should just be two cards, one with each ability. It's way too interesting for a common.

Wait, shit, this is stupid.

Would it be better if the datasmith kicker allowed you to play the robots from your hand instead of allowing you to search for it from your library?

It would be fine (powerlevel-wise) if the search effect put it into your hand, yeah.

I don't mind a bit of extra complexity on my commons. I base rarity more on individual card impact in a limited setting. I do have a complexity limit for commons, though, I just don't think this quite exceeds it.
>Grand Unraveling
Definitely not hybrid, but making it multicolor would defeat the purpose of the design. That's a tough one to fix.
But you went ahead and addressed it nicely here. Although, why not the bullet style of modal card? That seems to be the current design standard.

Always had issues with Auras/Equipment being attached to a permanent the controller of the Aura/Equipment doesn't control. I think this works fine for addressing that.

>CR01
Updated Academy Raider? Seems fine for a common. Actually, maybe... maybe 1RR for a 2/1? Eh, I dunno.

>CR02
So, Subterranean Shambler without Echo? Seems fine I think.

>CR04
Mono-hybrid and off-color? I think you should pick one or the other. Just feels kinda confused right now I think.

>CR06
Wizards likes saying "each combat if able" now. And I'm not really sure if this should have Haste, but it's your call. Wait, now that I think of it, out of all the creatures you have, why doesn't this big guy have Ambush?

>CR14
Not entirely sure about letting this trigger more often than Prowess. Probably just me though.

>CG01
Feels kinda odd to have to meet two different conditions like this. Actually, now I'm kinda wondering about how Pinnacle will play, since it can trigger at any turn of the game, not just later, as with your 5 or more mana mechanic.

>CG06
Not sure about this having both Trample and pseudo-Vigilance. Feels strong.

>CG12
Oh god, my eyes! Please cut the flavor text. Honestly, I would ask you to cut the reminder text too if it were of a higher rarity.

The rest all seems pretty solid. I'm sorry my feedback is sparse, none of these really excite me. I don't play Magic much, remember?

I don't like either version of this. Also, they updated the formatting for modal spells a while ago. This is how modal is done now. And you can form the bullets in MSE by placing two colons next to each other (ie. :: becomes • )

>why not the bullet style
Because it uses a half-line gap between bullet points, and MSE doesn't support them. So because autism,
basically.

>Royal Beastwarden
I think this illustrates a problem with Pinnacle well: it's super easy to get Pinnacle early on and you have to tack on riders like "Pay 2GG" to stop people snowballing
Also, I hate to say it, but you should say something like "...or tied for the highest converted mana cost" because Padeem etc. Think it still works as is, but that's probably how Wizards would template it.

>Aneketian Fieldworkers
Is GG necessary for a boring common? I'd make this a 3G 2/4 for no real reason other than that it feels more common. Then again, maybe you want restrict hard ramp to heavy green.

>Aneketian Colossus
Bump up the P/T a bit? This seems pretty tame.

>Ba of Inner Might
Something in me doesn't like sacrificing my five mana creature for short term ramp. I know this is quite a different card, but how about "[Cost?]: Exile ~ from your graveyard: Black Lotus"?

>Ancient Supremacy
stronk
but probably fine;

>Display of Power
Too good with pinnacle? Tone it down a little.

>Glorious Outfitting
this seems like a really, really complicated way to do an XG card. It's more complex and versatile this way, but an X spell is vastly easier to understand and scales just as well.

>Favor of the Bau
Oh, Unearth? Wasn't expecting that. Green is solid fit for it, anyway. Ooh, are you making a cycle of guaranteed value Auras? That's super cool!

What's the problem? You can't equip creatures you don't control anyway.

No, but you can mess with what they're attached to with other cards. I realize it's just my being really anal, but I don't think it's that much of a change.

New version of Azrael. Old version was 3RW and just put the tutored Equipment onto the battlefield, then attached it to Azrael if it was one of the named Equipments. But I already have a creature that tutors artifacts to the battlefield, so I decided to dial this one back a bit. For the record, all the Equipment buff the creature, but none grant evasion or Indestructible.

This feels yugioh as fuck, which isn't necessarily a bad thing. I like the idea of searching for one of a limited number of cool buffs.
Wait, I thought Azrael was the 90's batman replacement. Who's this clown?

>T2 Prime Speaker Zegana
Nice.

>turn two 2/2, draw a card
N I C E
Maybe even a 3/3 if you played a Savannah Lion t1, for that sick three card, two turn combo.

magiccards.info/query?q=pow=1 tou=1 cmc=7 -rider l!en&v=scan&s=cname

Greatest tech

Oh yeah, this is the other card I mentioned with Azrael. Though I misremembered what it did, she just tutors for Equipments, not just any artifact. Idea is that she has no real powers by herself, so she has to find her gear in a hurry. I was thinking of doing something like Azrael where she gets bonuses for tutoring cards with certain names, but that just kinda fell through.

(Ranty bits spoilered.)
Well, the Knightfall replacement was Jean-Paul Valley, who I probably won't adapt. He died at the end of his solo series. This guy, Michael Lane, was used as a guinea pig by Simon Hurt in his experiments to create three replacement Batmen... I think. (Morrison fucking sucks at continuity and needs to GTFO of comics altogether.) Regardless, he was eventually chosen by the Order of Purity to be their new Azrael, because... wait, I actually don't know why they chose him. Let's be honest, probably because he was already around and DC had a copyright that wasn't making any money and decided that just wouldn't do. (BTW Didio, go fuck yourself!) ANYWAY, the Order of Purity is apparently an offshoot of the Order of St. Dumas, the guys who headfucked the last Azrael, Jean-Paul. And they're an offshoot because... I have no idea. Jesus this guy is a mess. Really, the whole Azrael thing needs to be broken down and streamlined, especially why Bruce was so willing to put Jean-Paul in the Batsuit. I mean, I get that Dick never wanted to be Batman, but come on. And neither did Tim, who was too young to be Batman anyway. Really, I think if Jason had still been alive, he would've been the next Batman.

>card
Just asking for abuse. I feel like it would be printed as uncommon in a regular expansion once, then it'll only ever see prints in FTV or MM as a rare or mythic. Could be totally wrong, but keep in mind that this card will only keep on getting more and more powerful with each release.

You're in green, there are plenty of pump spells.
Besides that, there's stuff like Beguiler of Wills, Gigantomancer, Trostani's Summoner...
This has combo written all over it, people are gonna find ways to abuse it.

>Mono-hybrid and off-color? I think you should pick one or the other.
I would contend that monohybrid works well when paired with off-color abilities, as it adds more flexible requirements for fully utilizing the card. That was the intention, at least.
>CR06
>"each combat"
Thanks, will change.
>Pinnacle
It doesn't and won't appear on lower-cost permanents without additional riders to prevent misuse, as it's intended for mostly late-game impact. I don't think a few intervening if clauses on the cheaper cards will be too complex or obstructive though, and will hopefully allow those cards to remain useful late-game. That's what I was shooting for, anyway.
>CG12
I didn't think it was that bad, man. I'll cut the flavor text and see how the font size looks.
>Grapnel Gun
Seems fine, and translates flavor to mechanics well.
>Pinnacle
>"or tied"
I made a conscious decision not to include a tie clause, as I want the ability to function only if a player controls the undisputed largest CMC card. Go big or go home, man!
>Something in me doesn't like sacrificing my five mana creature for short term ramp
The mana cost ceiling for cards is generally higher in this block, so saccing this to play a bigger thing should be more likely and more helpful than it usually would be. I also wanted to provide color fixing, since this is an enemy-colored block. Do you think that makes sense?
>Display of Power
I can nix the +1/+1
>Glorious Outfitting
I have to have a green escalate card at common, so just converting this to an X card won't work for me. An X card also has no ceiling and wouldn't really work with monohybrid mana, both of which I'd like to keep on this card as well. I'll work on tweaking it.
>Unearth
Yup, unearth is the BG faction mechanic.
>Ooh, are you making a cycle of guaranteed value Auras? That's super cool!
A mini-cycle, but yeah. Thanks! Here's the counterpart.
>Grizzled Berserker
>Still not "Bearserker"
I am disappointed.

Somehow, my quote of your post disappeared. The comments are still there, at least! The post refers to your comments after I finish talking to COanon about Grapnel Gun

>I am disappointed.
Look at the creature-type

>Mono-hybrid and off-color
I get how they naturally synergize with each other, I just feel like having these two different elements on the same card isn't the best idea. But it's a super minor thing, if you don't hear about it from anyone else, I say keep it.

>CG12
Eh, to be fair, I was only looking at the image as it's embedded on Veeky Forums instead of the full image in its own tab/window, so maybe it looks better there.

>Unearth auras
Yikes. Sad to say that this interaction opens up a whole new can of worms. I suppose you could avoid most of them though by just restricting the usage to Auras with -N/-N effects (technically, just negative or 0 buff to toughness would be fine), but there are some fringe cases where the mechanic will become confusing and uintuitive. If you're curious, just look up Substance on the MTGSalvation wiki.

>page 9
Aw fug

>page 10
Aw, come on. Anyone?

This is such a memey card. I'm not sure if this works though as the only precedence of a card working like this was that joke card for the holidays.

"Memey"? And why wouldn't it work? You gain control of the creature when the puppet becomes attached to it, which you can do with the activated ability.

...

Question, folks: would this card work within the rules? and if so, how bad/broken is it?

Cooperative Research 4U

Enchantment

If a spell or activated ability would cause a player to draw one or more cards, they draw an additional X cards, where X is the total number of cards drawn by all players this turn.

I would love a deck based around this mechanic. What color(s) were you thinking?

Aren't desert-y locales and creatures usually white?

Eh, feel like I'd just rather have the second part of Alhammarret’s Archive.

I feel like it should just trigger once at each player's end step, or it combos with itself and ends up completely busted. Would be interesting to see in Commander though.

Not him, but Wizards seems to like putting these sorts of abilities in GU.

Not him either, but sometimes you have to make breaks with the setting to allow Magic to work properly. Kinda like how Ravnica, a giant city, still had access to all forms of mana. If you just put fluff before crunch all the time, you will end up pulling your hair out.

Wouldn't it not trigger itself because of the specification of "activated ability"? I could be wrong, but the end-step clause is a fine fix if that's the case.

Oh.

No, wait. What I meant isn't that it would trigger itself, but that the number of cards drawn will work to increase the number of cards drawn if the ability triggers again in the turn.

Like, imagine an ability that has you draw a single card. If you activate after your draw step, you draw 1, then another 1 for the draw step, to draw 2. Then you activate it again, and draw 1, then 1 for the draw step, then 2 for the previous activation for 4 cards. At least, I think that's how your effect would work.

Yeah, that's exactly what I was looking for! It allows anyone with multiple card draw spells to go critical (or if you have instant-speed card draw, to take advantage of someone ELSE going critical)

Thanks!

Bored and playing about with angels. First shot is far from balanced so far.

Not honestly happy with Sarandiel as she turns up too late to actually stop the stuff she stops. I'm also a bit iffy on Zaphkiel but I wanted to give playing about with Extort a go.

For Zaphkiel, I'd bump up the P/T. Either make it a 5/5 or something like a 4/7. As it is, it doesn't seem particularly powerful.

For Sarandiel, what's the reasoning behind giving the player hexproof? I understand the graveyard interaction ("Crypt Keeper") but not the hexproof. P/T fits her for how many keywords she has and how strong those effects are.

Neciel is solid. I'd even bump her down to 4RW and cut a point off of her attack to get her out a little quicker.

You only capitalize the first keyword in a sentence. No idea how to word Zaphkiel, maybe something like
>Whenever you pay an extort cost, [...]
Though I'm not 100% sure since there's no precedent.

Agreed on Sarandiel, though frankly, I think you should just cut out that part and stick it on a much smaller angel, because it just makes Sarandiel seem cluttered right now.

I guess the last one is fine, not entirely sure on Vigilance though. And please find better art. I will say though that I think you should look to more variety with P/T and rarity. I do realize how odd it is for me to be saying this.

change the last line of text on Lady Shiva to "target opponent" instead of "that source's controller" and you got a fun and powerful (if horrendous to play against) creature

Just feels odd to redirect it like that. Plus, I can already see abusing the hell out of her like a variant on Stuffy Doll.

Huh, starting to feel like I tutor to the battlefield too much. Is the CMC restriction good enough, or should it tutor to hand instead?

>Sarandiel

The personal hexproof was a reference to Leyline of Sanctity. That and me being kinda hesitant about making a 7CMC cost card that was mostly just graveyard hate. I might have overdone it in my attempt to make her more generally useful rather than just going 'Fuck it, she's a lifelink angel, she's gunna be useful for hitting things in the face at the very least'

>Zaphkiel

Fat ass angel sounds like a fun idea. Makes her a right pain to remove. I'll admit, pricing stuff that interacts with Extort is something I wasn't very sure about as there isn't much that actually does anything with it currently other than 'Be Extort' so I played it rather safe. Hence why she ended up lacking vigilance despite being an angel.

>P/T

Yeah, long exposure to Serra Angel has me mentally filling in 4/4 flying vigiliance when I look at an angel and not thinking about it too much more. That's a problem.

>Art

Finding non-terrible angel art with a fire or death theme that isn't already MTG art is a bitch. So, so many terrible looking goth angels.

Angels 2.0

Eh, not entirely happy about this, though I think it gets the core idea across, that Big Barda loves kicking ass in combat.

Still don't think you should capitalize Extort (yes, I do this in my posts, but no on my cards).

I thought you'd want to cut out the graveyard protection because you didn't want it to come in too late, but OK.

Art looks much better. And I wasn't aware of the low quality of Angel art on the internet. Honestly though, I'm not a huge fan of the bikini angels Magic has anyway. Just doesn't get across the idea of being a serene, graceful icon of White mana, I think. Like, on Vamps it's fine, like with Blood Tribute.

>god typing
>not indestructible

They're New Gods, they don't work like MTG's Gods. And frankly, I feel like people have given me enough shit for favoring certain keywords like Indie, DStrike, and Vigilance, I don't want to add another rule that says Gods have to be Indestructible (I already did it for Kryptonians).

>And I wasn't aware of the low quality of Angel art on the internet.

I recommend trying 'Death Angel' or 'Fire Angel' in google images or your favourite art site to see just how bad it is. Then gouging of eyes.

Hmm, death angel didn't work very well because it's also the name of a metal band. I can DEFINITELY see what you were talking about with fire angel though. It immediately made me think of the (likely garbage and generic) paperback novels the store I work at sells. Honestly, sometimes I just look at those books and read the synopses on the back for a laugh.

Ah, I see now.
Athnahr is largely a desert plane, so the culture is pretty ubiquitous throughout, which means desert-y cards are showing up in all colors.
So she incites rebels to attack other players? I like it. Seems like a fun politics/multiplayer card.
Is this representative of a creature's knowledge or mind or whatever being absorbed after death? That's also pretty cool.

>low quality of angel art
balnazzara.deviantart.com/favourites/66128834/Gods-and-Angels
Should be at least some decent stuff in there. JasonTN does a lot of good angels, too.

Thanks. That's very helpful.

Did someone say color bleed?

Do you archive your sets anywhere? It's such a shame that they'll never be seen by many people.

Just here in the pastebin. Not sure where else I'd even put them.
>Shred Essence
The counter is reeeeally iffy. Probably only acceptable in a Planar Chaos-style rulesbending set. In that context, though, it's cool and has a lot of utility.

>Traveling Seer
Seems cool.

>Amazing Grace
Right, the lore is she serves Darkseid and raises rebellions against him just so they can be crushed later, deriving the people of hope. So she raises rebellions, but is always pulling the strings in your favor. I really should get to all the New Gods sometime. No idea how to do Darkseid though. Gain control of creatures/permanents? Something that carries an air of "resistance is futile" I think.

>The Corinthian
Exactly. He can gain people's memories by putting their eyes into the mouths where his eyes would be. And yes, he can see with the eye-mouths, as well as speak and eat with them.

...

...

I get that R has Reach now, but this still feels super G.

Rolled 3, 6, 1, 2, 6 = 18 (5d10)

This just seems like a huge pain in the ass to keep alive, frankly. I kinda get the idea, but still. I feel like whatever is tied to G should just be an upside. Maybe... I dunno, maybe the standard Vamp ability (+counter when it kills a creature), then some mana that includes G and remove a +counter to, say, gain some life and draw a card.

...

Sorry, forgot this.

>Black, creature, card advantage, CMC 2, uncommon

RISE, IF YOU WOULD

>page 10
FUCK

Oh, wow, there is someone else here.

I am here as well, albeit several hours later now.
Should it not be "his or her hand this way"?

DEAD THREAD

Thoughts? Meant to be a Spirit tribal commander.

Bird cage + stick =

Rolled 4, 10, 4, 10, 8 = 36 (5d10)

Rolling.

>Emma Frost
Not according to Lost Legacy.

>card
Man, I never like seeing these "put into exile" triggers.Anyway, I think the card could stand to be a little cheaper, since Wizards seems to price recursion more cheaply when it's just your opponent's stuff, I guess because it's harder to find something that will work with what your deck was made for.

Flicker should be optional, or you'll have times where your opponents will target your creatures with something that wouldn't normally do much just because it might benefit them. Like if Spirits are attacking them, they could use a tap spell or something to Flicker them and get them out of combat.

What's wrong with a downside? I think it makes it all a bit more interesting in play.
I mean, this is pretty decent protection already, and it's not like you lose your spirits. If they have an ETB or LTB effect of their own, your opponent might still reconsider.

I wonder why the threads have been so quiet lately.

Name sounds a bit like a legendary creature. It's also quite weak. You could probably bump it up to a 2/1.

Not necessarily

That's a very old card though. I think nowadays counterspells are secondary in white.

I can see that, I was simply making the argument. Was not the one who posted the card originally, just thought I'd chime in and offer a potential reason as to why one might say it has president.

I think black should be tertiary in counterspells and be able to counter creature spells. White should be able to mess with noncreature spells (by returning them to hand, shuffling them into library, exiling them for a turn etc.)

That way blue's allies have a share in blue's big slice of the color pie.

That isn't modern design precedent which, unless specified, is what the cards posted here are assumed to follow and are most likely judged by.

>I think black should be tertiary in counterspells and be able to counter creature spells.
Why though? A counter is hard removal, and B already does hard creature removal. And that's not even getting into discard and cap access, which is basically just more removal. Really, every color but U has some hard removal, so they don't really need counters.

Countering a creature is just a slight variant on straight-up Murder-ing the creature. Black does all kinds of creature destruction.

>Black does all kinds of creature destruction.
Exactly. Black already has access to myriad ways to destroy or disrupt the play of creatures. It should have access to every available type of creature counterplay. No one color should.