My players are driving me insane

My players are driving me insane.

>Always play joke characters
>Complains that nobody takes them seriously

>Kills/ alienates relevant NPCs
>Complains nobody will give them quests

>Spends all their money on whores
>Complains I'm not giving enough treasure

>Give them a time-sensitive objective
>Complains that I'm railroading

I don't know what to do, and I'm losing my passion for the game every session. I'd stop DMing for them, but they're my friends outside of the game and I have nobody else to play with. I've asked time and time again for them to control themselves, but it always ends with them criticizing my abilities as a DM (Though I'm the only one in the group who has run games).

What should I do?

Stop DMing for them.

Let them run the game?

They only want to play, never DM.

Try getting them to play premade characters for a change.

Stop playing with jerks, find a group online.

Putting the game "on hiatus." Find more serious players to play with. You seem to be playing with infantile casuals who seem to think your game is a suitable substitute for Skyrim, the only way you're going to be happy is if you cut them away.

It sounds to me like they aren't immersed in your world at all. Try helping them makes characters with serious goals and developed background, teach them how to act like their character instead of themselves. Do this all beforehand until you can fit little tidbits of their characters in the actual game as a reward for great roleplay. Table top RPG's are about having fun, not about stressing over players. Maybe try and relax yourself when you DM and try to work around the problems. If a player gets too disruptive however that nobody else is having fun, ask him to tone it down or find another game.

It sounds like you have bad friends.

Okay, maybe not, but it does sound like there's a misunderstanding as to what kind of game you're all trying to play. They seem to misunderstand what an RPG even is. Their behavior shows they have no investment in the characters they play or the world they're navigating. They're just steering around their avatars as they would in a video game, acting on whims with no expectations of or regard to consequences. Ask them what they actually want out of the game, and then if that's incompatible with how they're playing, explain that to them. Killing a quest-giving NPC, surprise, means they don't get that NPC's quest. If they just can't comprehend or enjoy that, you'll all be a lot happier if you just drop it. If it looks like the real problem is just their immersion, then help them thread their characters into world more tightly, and then they might approach the game differently.

>people trying to have fun
>dm being a bitch about it

Y'know, a GM doesn't exist solely to serve the whims of the players. The relationship between GM and players needs to be symbiotic, not parasitic like OP has described. Otherwise no one's going to have any fun.

Honestly, stop GMing for them and try to find a group online or at your FLGS. You're fighting a losing battle with people who don't take this as seriously as you would like them too, and it clearly isn't a good fit. Also, if they want to run a casual Skyrim/Fallout 4 RPG, it would be better for them to have a GM who actually wants to run something like that.

Stop playing.

>I've asked time and time again for them to control themselves, but it always ends with them criticizing my abilities as a DM (Though I'm the only one in the group who has run games).
Looks like it's time for you to STOP PLAYING WITH THEM.

OP here, updating.

I've talked with the group, completely airing my grievances, and their response tells me that you're right and we just aren't compatible. I appreciate the reinforcements, I'll check around my FLGSs to find another group and spend time on the other side of the screen.

Thanks again

If nothing else, find people online to play with.

Kill their characters.

When they kill a NPC, make sure the guards of the town or the townsfolk kill or just apprehend them, that way they will know that in your world, actions have real consequences.

It might be the beginning of an Evil campaign, where they escape jail, and maybe from the Kingdom, and go around creating chaos all over the realm, being enemies of everyone.

Just warning you, most FLGS players are shit. You'll almost certainly have to winnow your way through several groups before you find a decent one.

>FLGSs
tfw not even one

One of the group's I dm for Is like this . I tried to make immersive story's, plan out NPCs , make a world and plot twists but they would not latch on .I then stepped it down talked to them and tried to get some out of combat RP going on .They tried but we're not having fun . I gave up about a year ago and have been bullshit dming since (no prep) . We meet once a week and they murder hobo around the world . Not fun for me but they have a great time .

I think tg blames the dm to much , sometimes the players just have different play styles. I have the group above and my other planescape group who can go 3 sessions (6 hour each) without entering combat once .

I've had similar issues OP.
Not as bad as yours but for a few weeks in the middle of curse of strahd campaign they were just not paying attention.
In the beginning they loved it and then it became a bit of a grind for awhile.
I've woven their back stories into the story they've interacted with NPCs but half of them would just be on their phone and not learn to play their characters.
I pulled the ones who did the most aside and told them to stop.
Now we are almost at the end, they still are in their phones. So when they are...bad shit happens to them and the group.
I think they are starting to get it.

This is retarded. Alienating the people around you because they don't meet your standards is a quick way to be alone. You're playing a game, it's supposed to be fun. Everybody has got to work to make it happen, including you. Lighten up a bit, change your expectations of the have, have some booze. You're playing tug of war, but you need to let go a little to meet them in the middle.

Better to be alone with standards than among faggots with none.

Fuck you and everything you stand for. Everyone at the table is supposed to be having fun, GM included. Players who crap all over someone's hard work and then hide behind "wow bro, it's only a game calm down we're having FUN" are the absolutely worst kinds of human being. Yes, you are a bad fucking person for doing it.

Sit down and explain what you just told Veeky Forums and say you will give them one more chance.
Start up a new session where you insists everyone try their hardest to actually rollplay good.

Play with older players.

It's probably for the best. The game should be fun for all involved, DM most certainly included, so everyone should be on the same page. If I had to make a wild guess, I'd say your friends are gamers, but their idea of RPGs comes from video games, where they're less likely to actually immerse themselves in the role of a character in a world, and more likely to amble about doing whatever they can get away with. And that can be fun. It's possible to run a campaign like that. It would be an awful campaign, but it's possible. I suspect they won't miss the game, and neither will you once you find some new groups.

What exactly did they say?

>Alienating the people around you because they don't meet your standards is a quick way to be alone.
And that is worse than being around shitty people why?

Just dump the group. I was in the same situation as you were and I'm much happier for it. Better to not have a game than to have a shit one.

Two words for you, my friend: "controlled expectations."

Talk it over with your friends. Do they know some of the things they do drive you nuts?

>No fun for me
Why do you keep doing it? Are you retarded? Can't you ask them if they want to play board games instead? Video games? Go watch a movie? Fuck idk, something you'll have fun doing too.

Why should OP change his expectation and lighten a bit? Why can't the players change theirs and darken some?
The other user also advised finding serious players, not ruminating alone in a corner.

>GM doesn't exist solely to serve the whims of the players

No, kill the players.