Haha, hey guys, Katie wanted to come to game night, hope that's okay

>haha, hey guys, Katie wanted to come to game night, hope that's okay

If you and Katie bring food, sure, no problem

That way even if session is shit we get a free meal out of it.

If she plays then fine. RPGs aren't a spectator sport.

This is some lazy bait, no (You)s for (You).

For God sake Mark this is Advanced Dungeons & Dragons. Don't get mad at me because your girlfriend didn't have a good time.

she sulks and messes around on her phone the entire time while occasionally glaring at her bf

is this "playing"?

>haha, hey guys, I know it's right in the middle of the game but let me show you this funny video I just thought of real quick

Al, while you were fucking with your phone, your thief is standing perfectly still in the middle of the battlefield. Roll a dex check at minus 5 to avoid the arrow the orc on the ridge just fired at your head.

>I want you to listen to me. You accepted the L4P ad on the bulletin board and took up my fifth player slot, a slot that could have gone to anyone. That means you have a responsibility to the rest of the group and myself, your host, to play one session, and you will not leave until that session is over. Most people would be grateful for this opportunity, so do not think to insult me in my own house by trying to leave in the middle of the game.

>Now please, roll for initiative.

>the group is all gay men
>katie is a co-worker of his
>she's gamed before and is actually a good player

I'll admit my sins, I've done this, in my defense I was very drunk and I waited until a break in the action/DMing to reveal my find

Being very drunk at the game table is pretty disrespectful to the DM and other players.

I would totally just straight up leave if a GM told me that.

What if everyone is very drunk?

I hope your mother finds your genestealer fanfics.

Women are stupid and annoying, amirite?
Go fuck yourself.

>Women are stupid and annoying, amirite?

Women do ruin everything user, and I DM with my gf as a player.

my apologies, in my defense I was very drunk

As long as she pays the toll like everyone else, and suckles that DM cock

Women are cute! CUTE!

That's when the glock comes out and I remove myself from the situation

Leddit detected

Inform her she has to suck all our dicks the whole first session as initiation.

You guys made me do it so she has to!

>kill yourself, spraying brains all over the GM
>he props up your body and tapes it to the chair
>"you're still not leaving until we're finished"

Did the DM get to claim the booty as his divine right?

Are we still playing?

No he said for the first year it's community booty.

Do they roll initiative to determine turn order?

>His magical spell binds your soul to your body until the session is finished
>Even in death you cannot escape

JUST LET ME DIE GODDAMN IT

Of course, I see your group also uses this form of hazing the new guy.

It's the best way; I even make sure to bring my own special homemade lube each session. It's made with coconut oil.

Classy

What if the DM's very drunk?

>Blackleaf's Curse: If you die in the game, you die in real life and you can't die in real life until you die in the game

Did you try telling her that watching RPGs is boring as fuck?