Meanwhile on dragon Veeky Forums

And what's your excuse for having more than one head, too? Compensating for your small hoard?

REMOVE HUMANS!

...

Maybe if you spent less time fucking primates and more time killing gods we wouldn't NEED to make dragons great again.

Who /hydra/ here and when will we get our own board? I mean, I don't even hoard, and have you ever seen a hydra with a breath weapon?

It's ridiculous that we get lumped in with these one-headed bird-lizards just because we both have scales.

Stop sucking your own balls fag.

>being this much of a bitch chromatic
Go back to your fancy mountains and shit and stay there, this is why nobody likes you.

HOLY FUCK GET OUT
HYDRA ARE DRAGON FOO IN D&D

DOES NO ONE READ ECOLOGY ANYMORE?

THEY'RE NOT EVEN INTELLIGENT

YOU LITERALLY LET OTU A PHERMONE
THAT DRAGONS HOME IN ON SO THEY CAN EAT YOU

YOU FUCKING PLEBIAN SHIT-STOPPING CUNT.

I AGREE

GET OUT SWAMP SHITTERS

>jelly

Hydras are fucking shitters always samefagging

Wait I thought that in order to be a proper dragon you had to have high int/wis and otherwise you are just a giant lizard, magic capability is a must as well.

A lot of chromatics have sub-par intelligence and wisdom

Which is why if anything you should want us to have our own board where you don't have to deal with it!

I will have you know that the Lernean breed stands as the most intellectual hydra breed in existence! We are, after all, the direct descendants of the original.

>Still food for all breeds of Dragon
>Still got one brain
>Still harvested for Dragon attaracting Phermones
>Still Harvested for food anyway
>Still harvested for infinite Dragon-bone warriors or Greek warrior men
>Listed number one on necromancer favourites in Dragon magazine
Shut the fuck up, you're not a fucking Dragon.

So they do ... never knew that how do they cast spells then?

Age category, whether they're involved in that faggot-ass fucking Dragon Jyhad (No really, theres a literal Dragon Jyhad Dragons play like World of Darkness except Dragons) or are Klauth life increasing nom-som-nom-spawn or that Dragon template for Dragons that somehow fuck up and forget everything ever.

Why do you guys take advantage of these poor things?

Because the need the Money to put towards the Gnome Genocide fund.

And who here wouldn't fuck Deekin?

I'd fuck Deekin.

Who /ancient/ here
I just want all these bitchy sub-species to die off
Bahamut died for this

>red dragon

I want to see a white dragon humiliate a red dragon and steal the hoard.

Friendly reminder that Smaug got punked by a hobbit and shot down by a mortal with a bow.

Friendly reminder that you haven't evolved legs and are talking about wyvrns
Seriously fuck off sub-species filth

guise how do i shot fireboll?

The little shits worship me, out of their own volition mind you, to the point were it's annoying and I'm a dragon. There is no way I'm not using minions like that as cannon fodder.

>be me
>died 100 years ago
>risen as a zombie by a necromancer
>ate him
wat do now?

First you animate the necromancer as your undead servant (alternatively go through his books and learn how to do that first). Next make more undead and concur the world like you were already trying to do.

go guard dragon graveyards, as is your job now?

>That spoiler

Look here you fucking degenerate. There are a lot of things we'll tolerate but not that. You can be a gender queer human fucker but don't talk about touching other dragon's hordes here or I'll call the mods on you.

Your dub has convinced me of my sin. I will instead add her hoard to mine and make her subservient to me and only me.

With the size of the white dragon, it could basically mount the red dragon.

>White on Red Cuckold
>I'd be pic related if I could actually sweat

What do you like to hoard? I used to do the whole gold and jewels thing when I was a newfag but now I like hoarding halfling skulls.

So can we all at least agree that metallics are a bunch of fucking losers?

Having uploaded my soul into a digital construct I have taken to hoarding various bits of data such as music and video files I find across the EXNET.

I occasionally break out the hoarde when I need to listen to something after uploading myself into my combat body.

At least I don't swim in shit you swamp nigger.

hey /knight/ I need help. my dragon left for groceries. pls send help.

lel

I think OP expected a different direction.

As a white dragon, I find the aurora as beautiful.
I hoard Light. One day the sun will be mine, then the stars.

And rip thread.

All right folks, that was short lived.

I am not OP.

Oh, wow I love seeing a dead thread again.

(Really though, I expected more)

Why does everyone forget about Wurms...?

uhhh who knows, have a (you) to add to your hoard.
sooo no /k/nights on? I could really use some saving

Every thread about dragons always devolves into dragon sex talk, so instead;

How do you like to portray or use dragons in your setting? I've seen it done a million different ways and its always a little different each time. Seems like no matter how you do it someone will complain.

Also somebody post the picture of the cute dragon with the ballgag that says 'dragon fuckers league!', I forgot to save it last time I saw it.

Massive slutty NEETS, who spend all day inside their cave, because most live in a shitty, icy wasteland. Sometimes they pick a kobold at random from their warren, and pamper them, treating them as if they're the dragon's favourite, even letting them fuck the dragon, something akin to God himself doing the same, and then adds the kobold to it's harem, where they are only allowed to cuddle the dragon. Then, when they die, they get sewn into a huge blanket for the dragon.

They also spend most of their time doing... Well, basically this.

Dude, never stop building dat sweet hoard of gold and gems. However, most dragons develop an eccentricity to hoard such as in your case is halfling skulls: mine is potions and alchemical materials (although I do actually use them which is weird, the materials not the potions).

And this is why you deserve to be sword raped by a bunch of dimwitted tin cans. Hoard this, hoard that... all you care about is sitting in your basements on measly piles of trinkes until your scales rust off so that a peasant with a pitchfork can do you in. You lack vision, you lack scope.

Why would you want to settle for that when you can actually get out of your lairs and conquer those gnats? Make all of them your slaves, and those that don't make good slaves can serve as food.

If you're fine wity being a glorified sideshow attractions for wandering knights then fine, but I'm starting a world where dragons actually rule, and those who disagree can burn. Who's with me?

Is it weird that humans have basically started worshipping me? They bring me lots of food and treasures, are perfectly fine with me sleeping in the middle of their city, they respect me as some kind of ancient guardian, and they all pretty much enjoy being in my presence? Occasionally these adventurous folk come through town and the two dwarves make it a point to spend hours drinking with me. I'm a little alarmed that they're able to keep up though.

I've started buying and selling weapons and armor that they go and find. LITERALLY making anywhere from three to five times as much gold just flipping gear as they are going out and finding the shit.

Draganon, I'm going to make a suggestion that worked wonders for me.

Banks.

You see, people like their money. They like it to be safe. And sure, I could have gone and just taken it, but there's a better plan. I allow humans and such to come and add their money to my hoard.

I went from a middling sized pile of gold to needing an entire secondary cave complex complete with vaults and me-sized tunnels just to store it all. And all I had to do was promise those humans not to let "adventurer" types take it (like I would anyway).

And when they want to take their money back? Well, I just charge them a fee to take it back. One of those trickster Greens (you know the type, I'm sure) has told me I should start charging "interest" and actually LOANING my gold out, but humans have very short lifespans, I'm not yet sure what sort of fee I should charge.

Guaranteed, it works. I am the linchpin that the economies of two empires and five independent city-states revolve around, and I'm working on a growing kingdom off to the south.

I don't even have to take those princesses any more, I was actually OFFERED one in exchange for a loan as collateral!

Is there a separate board for constructs in the shape of dragons?

Because I'm very flammable.

My friend white dragon just text me that he's gonna kidnap an Amazon princess, I'm not sure if this is a good idea, guys should I stop him?

...

Kidnap her yourself before he does.

You folks are aware that your time is coming to an end, right? You will be erased by a threat you never knew existed.

Hey my obsession helps deal with the tin cans quite a bit, not to mention it makes the gnats think that I am somewhat more civilized and thus acceptable as a neighbor. This is true despite occasionally stealing from merchant caravans and eating a few cows. However, social ascension takes time and trying to go out an conquer the world will only get you killed by a bunch of adventurers, that has been well documented. However, inserting yourself into the political system when the time is right however is a much better idea and has shown to be successful many times over.
It depends on where the civilization is and how large it is, but in general it is a bad idea as you can get killed trying to capture the princess much more easily and the princess herself is capable of killing you if you're unlucky. I don't do so personally as there are no civilizations like that near my cave but I know dragons who do it regularly, it's just risky.

Fuck off nyarly

>Hey my obsession helps deal with the tin cans quite a bit, not to mention it makes the gnats think that I am somewhat more civilized and thus acceptable as a neighbor. This is true despite occasionally stealing from merchant caravans and eating a few cows. However, social ascension takes time and trying to go out an conquer the world will only get you killed by a bunch of adventurers, that has been well documented. However, inserting yourself into the political system when the time is right however is a much better idea and has shown to be successful many times over.

There are few things that could prove my point better than this, and this is why you'll always be second best.

You try to work yourself into an existing system, I'm going to make a new system inherently centered on us. Get aboard, loser, we're going to make dragons great again.

Who?

Ok go and get yourself killed then, the current system is centered upon a single powerful ruler, it doesn't take too long to be at the top once you're accepted by the society. Once you are you can make a dragon kingdom and adjust the society however you want. All it takes is for you to not be an impatient idiot subject to your basest urges.

/Ancient/ here.
I've been around some 2000 year's now and let me tell you, cults are the way to go.
I made a warrior cult that worships dragons AND said that the shortlived fucks could become us!
The fucking idiots believed me!
I haven't been attacked for about 1200 years.
This is definitely the way to go.

>I haven't been attacked for about 1200 years
>implying dragon-slayer scums are not on this board
That shithead George started all of this

>Ok go and get yourself killed then, the current system is centered upon a single powerful ruler, it doesn't take too long to be at the top once you're accepted by the society. Once you are you can make a dragon kingdom and adjust the society however you want. All it takes is for you to not be an impatient idiot subject to your basest urges.

Oh please. Are you saying that you're doing what you're doing not to ultimately satsisfy the same urges?

Plus, social climing? Really? You are a petty lizard living in a cave under the hills in the countryside, who's going to take you seriously? Much less willingly let you into a position of authority.

What kind of degenerate subspecies produced such an imbred retard like you? Hydras?

He didn't even slay that pathetic excuse for a dragon.
He just put a fucking ribbon on it.
A FUCKING RIBBON.

Was that a true dragon though? Not some sort of wurm or serpent?

I don't know what to call this.

I don't live in the fucking countryside. My main lair in a full blown laboratory I have potions that can do more things than your tiny brain can even imagine. I have multiple exits to it that are all heavily trapped (I don't trigger them) that allow me to quickly access just about anywhere in the kingdom I am working on getting. I could do it by force but I know how that turns out. If there is one thing I can't stand it's a fucking dumbass who doesn't know shit about what the fuck they're talking about telling me how to do something. I am respected and am a few YEARS away from controlling the entire Kingdom where I live I don't want you fucking this up for me because you are suck a fucking retard that you don't know what happens when a dragon tries to conquer the world, they get themselves killed every single fucking time. And then I am set back a century or so because the humans don't trust dragons any more.

For such an enlightened being you sure have thin scales.

Plus, I don't believe you. Potions, laboratories? You're a cattle raider and a petty thief. And the reason you settle for that is that you probably too weak for anything better. I bet you tried once, got your scaly ass kicked by a single knight with a single squire, and since then did not stick your nose outside of your lair. Do you even know what a human princess smells like? Sure you don't you kidnapping-virgin.

Just because you're too small (are you at least bigger than a human) to play in the big league doesn't everyone else is too. Where is your kingdom, by the way? Ooh, you're got YEARS away from controlling it? If they still tolerate your soft-bellied ass I'll be done with it in months time, so I'll probably start with it. You can watch if you want, maybe you'll learn something.

...

2000 years and you still don't understand how apostrophes work.

Hey, 2000 years ago that was our grammar. Far better than what you have these days.

>petroglyphs
>grammar
I'm sending an adventuring party to your lair to tutor you in linguistics.

I have had some dumbass try to do what you're doing a few times and it always messes up what I'm doing so forgive me if I sound angry it's because I don't want my plans to be set back AGAIN. I raid cattle because I still need to eat and contrary to popular belief you creating gold using alchemy is really hard (at least not without using other materials that are just as valuable) sure I might be able to generate a large profit but I still have urges and I fulfill them in the classic dragon fashion because it comforts me to do so and it has limited effect on the populace thus it is unlikely to get me killed. As for not wanting to fight knights, that is laughable I could kill knights in my sleep, however, what I AM afraid of is proper COMPETENT adventurers, they can and will kill you if you are too destructive. I am being conservative in my estimate and it is an estimate for being in control of the entire kingdom rather than just a prominent city which I should be in charge of with in the week. The kingdom contains about 6 major cities acting as trade hubs to different areas around the kingdom as well as places for nobles to conduct important political stuff. There are also countless small villages each of them unique. It is a major world power, it is prominently human, and it has a particular interest in magic. You know what you have proven yourself to be an obstacle to my cause. You better watch yourself because I will come for you and I will kill you, consider yourself warned.

Human Knight here, how do I get a qt dragon girlfriend?

Tell them to wear strawberry-flavoured armour.

What kinda dragon is this?

Why are you losers still plonking around on the Material plane, instead of the one attuned to your element?

That's not a dragon! That's a penis! Can't fool me.

If your plans are that easily foiled by outside force you're bad at making them. Not surprised really, all I'm hearing from you is excuses. "Can't raid villages, people die", 'Can't fight adventurers, they sting", "Can't burn castles, get out of breath", "Oh yeah, but at least I can kill knights! When my arthritis doesn't get me..."

Remember that real dragons get shit done. You haven't done nothing except sitting in your lair and occasionaly eating cows. Creating gold with aclhemy is difficult? You frog, get out and rob some palaces! Was your latest princess alchemical too?

Do you at least have WINGS?

Ask for a date, seems feminine enough for your tastes.

The Elemental Planes are rather boring to be honest and I always felt like something was missing there.

Stop presenting your prejudices as facts.

I'm not talking about regular adventurers, those are easy to deal with but ones that are actually very good at what they do kill dragons without batting an eye.

A bad dragon.

I moved to Astral long time ago, what the hell did you forget on Elementals?

>I'm not talking about regular adventurers
Do you think I am? Just how low-level you are?

/juvenile/ here (no bully), what's your expirience with kidnapping princes?

Eh. Sure. But they'll only taste that way if you get a 95% or higher on your exam.

dont bother, while politically heirs are quite important they seem to lack the bait capabilities for adventurers - if anyone shows up it'll just be an army ( and they usually don't carry any useful loot)

brian-peters.co.uk/Kemp Owyne.MP3
Thoughts on this human song? Their desire to romance dragons seems to have been around for longer than we thought.

But I'm not going to just take the prince and put him in my lair, I'll leave ransom demands. Won't they send ransom then if they know from the start that this is what I'm after?

Mods are asleep post EP

Ah sorry about the dissaperence younglings but I had a nap.
Tell you what I'm gonna be answering some questions that you have.
Maybe you'll learn from this old bag of bones.

Hey guys, I just acquired a pretty decent amount of gold, but I need ideas on where to set up my hoard. Most of the caverns around here are filled with fucking dwarves and the rest have a bunch of knights circlejerking in them, so the traditional cavern idea is out of the picture. Any suggestions?

Maybe you could dig your own small cavern?
Big enough to hold a decent amount of dosh but small enough so that you can sleep infront of it to keep it safe from those dirty mountain dwellers.