Why have you stolen from the giant's garden...

Why have you stolen from the giant's garden, even though he would've gladly shared his bounty with the humans had they only asked politely?

I was going to ask at first, but climbing that beanstalk got me into this really bad mood.

For the challenge.

We tried asking the last five giants politely and they slaughtered and ate us. If he's still willing to share we'll apologize and do what we can to repair our relationship, but you can bet we'll be cautious about it.

How badly have you fucked up, OP?

Not having to rely on the whims of a 10ft angry monster to survive is an important part of my strategy

His home looked abandoned though.....

>We tried asking the last five giants politely and they slaughtered and ate us
Slaughtered you?

An easy target. Adventurers are cocks.

We got better.

They had 1 HP left so they were able to drag themselves back into town by the entrails and get a cleric to heal them

After being eaten?

The bard dared me.

Barbs be tough, yo.

This is your garden? I just thought it was a forest of trees that happened to be apple trees. Could you put up a sign or a fence or something?

> Why have you stolen from the giant's garden, even though he would've gladly shared his bounty with the humans had they only asked politely?
The fall of the giant will invite me to my rise.

It's more fun this way. Later, I will apologize and ask to be his adorable miniature wife.

Who is this guy? I see him posted everywhere.

Try googling the filename mate

Diplomacy makes me feel like less of a man.

It's in human nature to be shitty to others.

Max Stirner, a hypocrit who dressed selfishness in philosophy, and also a source of top memes

In our culture making a request is an insult, as it puts the onus of determining the outcome on the person asked. Now his honor is protected no matter his choice: if he attacks us he is just, if he demands restitution he is fair, if he seeks no redress he is kind.

Perhaps, if he does not choose to grind us into tiny bits, we shall make for him a sign to hang in the garden so none of us may be as confused in the future.

Mad spook detected.

Don't trust anyone over 21'

You jealous?

Is he the male Ayn Rand?

It's easier to beg for forgiveness than permission.

It's quite common in Columbia, or so they say.

A king does not ask. It is mine by decree of my strength and my will to take it from you.

Submit or stake your claim and perish, for I walk the path of Royalty.

>Reach Heaven through violence.
>If you should meet God on the road, kill him.

The royal decree clearly stated that I was not to negotiate with the giant by any means. I am being watched. If I am seen interacting with him in any non-hostile way, I will be executed as a traitor where I stand.

If the Crown has its way, the giant will be consumed in the same blast that kills me.

>It's in nature to be shitty to others.

FTFY, humans are only a symptom of the greater problem.

He's better. Ayn was spooked by the foolish concept of private property.

Isn't that a picture of a storm giant? I thought cloud giants were the ones who keep gardens.

We were incredibly drunk and it was a bet.

>implying Ayn Rand wasn't going full-retard with her self-contradicting ancap philosophy
At least the man is honest with himself.

Storm giants subsist on lithium ions.

She also took all the government assistance when she was diagnosed with lung cancer.

Rand is a hypocritical cunt.

Well, her philosophy was basically "be a selfish prick, and whoever isn't is a sucker". It doesn't have anything against TAKING free money if someone else is stupid enough to give it to you.

Even as a battery joke, this doesn't work.

>". It doesn't have anything against TAKING free money if someone else is stupid enough to give it to you.
Then why was the male taggart a villain?

BECAUSE he's the villain. The book is from the point of view of the heroes, therefore they're the ones whom you're supposed to cheer for when they act like pricks. When others do it, it hurts them.

You need to think more like a sociopath.

Because we're the villains of course! We can't win fairly! That would be wrong!

Yes I actually ran a campaign once where the Bad guy was named Richarde D'Astarlé. It took the PCs ages to figure it out