ITT: Magic cards where you don't know what the fuck is happening in the art

Where the fuck are her organs, in the tits?

It's a mess.

...

That perfectly describes a living wall

>Blue palette on red card
I hope somebody got shot for this.

Elves don't have organs.

nuMagic art direction in a nutshell. Kaladesh is horrible to look at with few exceptions.
>mfw Masterpieces Plat Angel

Almost as bad as judge snapcaster.

You take that back you son of a bitch. Drew Tucker is amazing.

ITT: Millennials with shit taste

its a magic beam being blocked by a wall of doves. That circle is a bundle of wings and theres an azorius building in the background.

Probably thought it was a blue-sounding card name, which it is.

...

Is the beam being blocked by the doves? I was under the impression that the beam and the doves were on the same side, since the beam is white and blue and the card uses white/blue mana.

>eight hundred birds form an anus and shit out toothpaste over an unsuspecting city.

>when artists can't into action poses

The physical doves arent, but the enchantment is manifesting as a stained glass looking space of doves.

thicc

I'm used to jackals having more than 2 legs. Does "Hurr" stand for "Crippled and retarded?

It has four legs. The hind legs aren't even obscured, they are highly expressed in the contours of the subject.

how about this

I actually like bizarre stuff like that on instants and sorceries though.

I thought it was replicating a meteor. The lightning iconography is weird, but it works with red.

that's clearly a picture of stasis. are you an idiot?

it,, isn't,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

lol landwhales

looks fine, get your eyes checked

nah it has two faggot lmao

Two cookies, I mean.

no cookies

What are they then?

blind or retarded?

Rude.

so both

Bully, pls go back to /pol/ or /v/ or whatever.

huuuuurrr

...

Meatballs. Lightnings will always fork when there's two meatballs is what the card is saying.

The equilibrium. Both side can't move or they will fall off. The palette with colors shows that the equilibrium of stasis encompass all.

One cookie is becoming two cookiez

...

I don't even need to google it to know that this is one of Nielsen's 'i'm high' arts. Those are her best arts though.

>not liking contrasting color pallets against frames

It looks good, same with FoW's red on blue frame.

>this whole post
Please leave Veeky Forums you massive faggot.

On topic: I dont know why its a map.

Imagine four balls on the edge of a cliff

This is really simple, its the Sun/Moon going across the sky ala timelapse, you cans see the field of stars in the background doing the same.

I understood that reference.

...

...

>a lightning bolt forks to strike two cookies

There's a fine difference between being a landwhale and being a sentient tube. Look at the artwork, her ribcage is sticking out.

Terese Nielsen has two final forms:

>I'm so fucking high I don't know what I'm painting

and

>I'm going to paint the hottest guy/girl I possibly can

Bless her bisexual heart.

Drew Tucker is too good an artists for Magic

>paints herself
>paints her daughter

It's a picture of foxfires with some unnecessary tiling and fox silhouette.

well, the topic of this thread isn't "shit art that you hate" it's "art where you don't know what the fuck is going on"

Chandra Ablaze is a good one.

shes in the air, pushing the spear into a demon but her arms aren't extended

This looks like a shirt design.

she is "falling" into it. that is her arms bracing the spear.
go jump off a building/rise feet first with a broomstick as your spear. you are gonna hold the middle/butt end of the spear naturally.

Standard timelapse, taken at Urborg (thus, the phyrexian corpses).
Except instead of it being all one speed, it speeds up because temporal bullshit.

Hydra heads are typically represented as counters.
That art of Doubling Season is a wood carving of the effect of the enchantment on a hydra. Said wood carving may or may not be the focal point of said enchantment.

>shit art that you hate

While we're on the subject though: I dare anyone to find art shittier than polarity reversal.

i love all the people art by Susan Van Camp
theyre all triple compositions of a close up, like a full body shot and then animals for some reason

best one

>not knowing Escher when you see it

I literally don't even look at red card art anymore.

i think they're trying to evoke the graceful aspect of like renaissance-style heraldic imagery

or some st. george-like stuff

Can you fork a counterspell and have the forked spell counter the original counterspell?

Can you fork a fork for twice the fork action?

It's actually the process of a gigantic spell going from the 'idea' of a simple bird shape into actual living doves, as a huge swarm of them. Look at the innards of the circle or ring of 'concept'. The big blue energy is just the raw magical input of mana (hence blue white)... the basic dove shapes are child-like and become real tangible things

>Twin hydras killing eachother so they mutually gain heads/power, stylized.

Yeah that art is actually cool.

Everyone is ironically pretending they don't understand the images right? You motherfuckers can't be this dense.

The counterspell idea would work.

Forking a fork would leave the second fork as still just a fork waiting for you to choose a target. No snowballing here.

That said, forking a fireball or lightning bolt that you cast is a pretty good strategy.

It's a basin with handles placed in a pond. There's a zombie coming up through it, presumably because said basin is a portal from the underworld. Perfectly clear.

It's a chalice being dipped into a cursed swamp/mire. The size of the singular grass blades indicates it's a cup, not a basin. Also the thing wouldn't be made of solid metal if it were that large.

But you've got the right idea. I think the image of the zombie is more of an idea or image than a real zombie.

get an education, faggot

To be fair, the user probably didn't consider that all murders made by angels are graceful.

That's the entire point of the picture you posted in reply, anyways. Angels never need make an effort to do anything, even when 'physical exertion' would be required by mortals.

>Also the thing wouldn't be made of solid metal if it were that large.

Sizable bronze vessels were absolutely a thing in ancient Greece. You're probably right about the grass indicating scale, though.

I see legs...of something

That's what I was trying to say. Had he an education, he would have known that the effortless and weightless stance was an attempt to evoke the way angels were portrayed in classical art.Which is incidentally why I really like that particular Avacyn artwork.

That bitch has a swiveling dedicated handle though. Even so, jesus christ. Why?! Clay jars are lighter you fucks.

Without a fork, you can only eat one cookie, but with a fork, you can eat two at once!

Its so your slaves can lift a shiny thing into the ritual party room.

>You were a dove once; a dove!

I understood that reference.

It's one of those Mardu cannons like in this.

holy shit that was my first thought as well

A hydra, a commonly green creature that likes counters and even in the real world was legendary for it's multiplying heads.
Shown here in the style reflecting the set with the hydra mirrioring it's self.
This fits perfectly man

TETSUOOOOOOOOOO!!!

You go fuck yourself, god how happy I would be if all magic art was at least half as good as Drew Tucker.

I've always known what it is but it still looks like a goat screaming between two rings.