"Hey, adventurers."

She's pregnant with humanity. Technically our whole world is in her womb, she just manifests an avatar of herself inside it.

She'll soon give birth, then promptly get preggers again.
The child will probably become one of the (overmany) demi-divine heroes of the age.

So she's pregnant with a giant amount of kids, one of whom she can turn into?

So recursive prenancy?

This could be a pretty neat story. You have to make her give birth to the world.

Or the god the world is meant to become.

Exiting the cosmic vagina will be the most tumultuous event the world has ever experienced

Reply with a brief greeting and continue on my way.

Eat her fetus
(I'm currently CE)

Tap it. Move on.

I don't think so - I mean, part of being the fertility goddess is presumably BEING fertile, right?

Guess it depends what she needs to be doing - or if the person she needs help from is more likely to help a pregnant woman in distress or to help a woman they think they can get with if they help them.

A Schrodinger-like quantum state of pregnancy that's only determined when she turns up - sometimes yes, sometimes no (perhaps different for different temples and cults)

>basic hospitality
Always a wise move with deities, just ask the greeks

Tell the DM that just because we all started discussing kinks when we broke out the beer after last session doesn't mean he needs to pester me about mine.

breddy gud belly 6/10 I guess, I like them bigger, and the girls thiccer but I think /d/ ruined
me on normal sized pregnant bellies anyway

Offer my seat

Normal pregnant bellies are easily the best. You just want to embrace and kiss them. Not exactly a sex thing though. Just makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside

My brain chemistry is such that there's only raw carnality. I understand the warm fuzzies, but this is pretty deeply ingrained.

Oh my god.

OH MY GOD.

I'm sick and fucking tired of people always assuming a Fertility figure is automatically about being virile or fertile. It's not about that god dammit, it has more to do with getting a good harvest and new heads in the flock. The "just knock my wife up, senpai" bullshit was often secondary or even tertiary. All you slack-jawed hump bunnies think it's all hyper-hips and turbo-tits when it wasn't! It goddamn wasn't! Stop assigning lewd to deities that had none!

Was Ceres a turbo-slut squirting out bastards left and right? Oh that's right, that wasn't the Goddess of Bounty, that was the goddamn Goddess of Love and Sex, Aphrodite.

scout the area before these freaks show up

>thinking people on Veeky Forums even know what a harvest is

In Valerian she just shat out a whole generation at once and rest of the time does nothing.

Yeah, sorry, guess we don't have a leg to stand on. Sorry. We don't get it from anywhere, honest.

What I'm hearing is that the fertility goddess -
and we haven't established a pantheon here, we're just talking in general, like, there could be a whole fucking host of harvest goddesses in this pantheon, but I digress - this fertility goddess, she needs to look like she eats well, that's what you're saying?

Thicc a must for fertility goddesses, you heard it here first folks.

>The Fertility figures of neolithic or even Paleolithic Europe should determine High Middle Ages Europe

So the mythology should be Christian exclusively?

It's just a fap figures of someone who LOVES it at T H I C C

I'm trying to find where you mentioned that time period in your post, and even if you did mention it, which you didn't, you're attacking the conception of a fertility goddess as such in general. My purpose in posting this to refute you is to show that this is ingrained in the cultural consciousness, this is part of the human condition.

And you're very likely a faggot homoman if you don't like it. Get down with the thiccness or neck yourself.

lithe bodies are the best on both sexes

>Nobody mentioned Tome of Battle

Ideal man is ottermode, ideal woman is thicc but not truly fat (and this is coming from someone whose porn search terms frequently include the terms "bbw" and "ssbbw" - I admit that I, like all beings, am less than ideal) that turns into what Natalie Fiore looked like when she was pregnant when pregnant. Google that shit, and try to deny.

lol welp i just got memed

Tell the DM to fuck off with his/her magical realm.

This is what hte ideal non-pregnant belly looks like and if you disagree you're lying.

Memed how? The use of the word "meme" is getting so loose nowadays I never know what anyone is talking about.

All this talk of fertility goddesses has blinded us to one possibly horrifying possibility.

War has gotten pregnant.

memed as in punk'd or cranked

She looks like she won't survive winter, and that her children will go thirsty.

Thicc was chic for hunter-gatherer society because, get this, they neither had crops to grow nor animals to raise. Their focus on human fertility was entirely due to that being the only fertility they really could "control" because everything else was just harvested from the land.

It's why a Goddess of Beer makes sense for a Sword and Sandal campaign but not something in Faerun.

Are you saying Natalie Fiore in her third trimester is anything other that jeans-creaming? Fuck off m8

it makes me feel ashamed taht people like you exist

Do you masturbate to Auschwitz pictures?

PC is thinking of getting herself knocked up before she goes to save the world. I mean, it should all be over and done before it matters, right.

But she also found out her noble house is cursed/fated to have exactly one child at each generation. Which means she can't just fuck around, have a kid, then go home and get married properly, because that's the only kid she'd ever have.

Really shit revelation, tbphwyf.

congrat on not understanding biology

And I'm sure your parents are exceptionally proud of you. Just thrilled.

...

don't have to

>CG deity.
"You did enter into my holy woods and didn't even jerk off! This will not stand! "

YES! Why do you filthy liberals constantly forget that!? Put a gun in your giant-ass weeaboo mouth and DO IT, for the sake of all fantasy!

Says the necrophiliac, lol

thanks

That's not that horrifying - war has many sons, she's given birth to all sorts (though admittedly that's often not a good thing)

He areolas are a bit hueg, but I'm glad you brought this into my life

skellingtons are for more than just spooks and archery

>two upper rows seriously into fat chicks
>lower left only one not all about tits and ass
>lower middle only precursor to modern anime sluts
>lower right obsessed about ass

>no sixpack
get out

now this is a fair point.

If a woman can't even take care of her body, how do you expect her to take care of a child?

You are most welcome, sir. Also familiar with Nadine Jansen? How about Anorei Collins? Both did material during their pregnancies, both were insanely perfect like Natalie. Nadine was slightly lighter in her build but still voluptuous and plush as fuck, and Anorei was a bit heavier, and is the greatest argument for a living Venus I've ever seen.

Go with the Gods, brother.

Man she's sucking in her stomach. I mostly agree though. Slight girls are the best.

Pretty sure all fatty chasers are inbred hicks. Explains why America has such an obesity problem

Or brits