Tell me about the satanic scare papa Veeky Forums !

A foul text, to be sure, but an important document in the history of our kind.

I don't know how it is elsewhere in the world, but it always seems as things get safer here people seek reasons to be mad or scared of something.

I live in middle of nowhere Kansas and I'll hear people fussing over gangsters.

I knew a dutch guy who believed demons lived underground and were infiltrating society, and that good christians had to rise to arms to defend the world from them

Well, when you exist as a U.S. vassal state, it was bound to happen.

I want a Kanna in my life.

>Once it was discovered that various pagan dieties, mythologies, and god and Satan himself were started in 2e
You mean 1e. 2e excised/disguised pretty much everything of that sort to try and alleviate the issue.

>nopan
>unbelievable softness
>sexually active

Everybody wants a Kanna

>A Texan guy I used to play vidya with online said he refused to play "witchy" games, i.e anything with spell casting or even slightly dark themes
user you shouldn't use witchery! It never ends well, trust me.

>Basically it's all because Americans are melodramatic and will make a fuss about anything.
Funny enough those fusses seem to coincide with either elections or when one of those pastors of a megachurch gets caught diddling kids, or exchanging meth for sex with young men, or going on vacation with his rent-boi. Coincidence sure is a funny thing.

>>sexually active
b-but...

...yeah, this sums it up about right.

...

Well, young'un, you gotta remember that there were a lot of religious nutjobs who were amongst the settlers of America, and so there's a level of religious nuttery backed into the nation's psyche.

For example, that's why circumcision is so popular there even though that's supposed to be a Jewish tradition; lot of well-meaning religious kooks who abused people's ignorance by promoting it as a legitimate medical operation, in order to "cure" the "soul-destroying evil" of masturbation.

Anywho, it all started in the early 80s when some emotionally troubled young man couldn't take it anymore and killed himself.

His bitch of a mother, rather than accept that maybe it was her fault, looked around for somebody else to blame, fixated upon D&D as an obvious scapegoat. So, she founded a loony cabal that called itself "B.A.D.D" and started publicly protesting against D&D.

As America's got a long anti-intellectual streak in it, and there was a pre-existing fixation on the idea of wide-spread Satanic cults, and D&D was, at the time, mostly seen as the province of nerds with more brains than were good for them, people actually started taking them seriously.

End result was that D&D was driven underground, and admitting to playing it in public was to invite mockery, castigation and bullying, until the public grew up and lost interest in it.

>Bunch of Americans raised a generation of idiots who raised a generation of shits and the idiots didn't want to take responsibility for raising a shitstain generation.

And now that shitstain generation complain about millenials.

At least we're maintaining the status quo...

Who else here wishes their regular group had that many girls in it?

Less demony, but also check out Mazes and Monsters to be better aware of the real perils of role-playing.

It's a documentary based on true facts and was filmed in real time.

Whaaaaaaaat

You know how there can be too much of a good thing? Well, with women the critical number is usually 2.

Nooo, my rock paraphernalia DDD:

They get better with time and experience but I have yet to play with a woman whose first character wasn't the most murderous of murderhobos.

Also there's some truth to the stereotype that they're good roleplayers but not as great with the mechanics. It can get a little frustrating to have to explain the same thing repeatedly. Depends on the woman, the nerdy ones in my STEM courses usually take to the mechanics with ease while the less nerdy ones from clubs, friends, or electives tend to be better at the RP side.

>kids these days

I'm sure it's partially a grass is greener type deal, just think my group could benefit from being less of a sausage fest.

Grognard Christfag here, it was all a bunch of horse-shit brewed up by idiot soccer moms looking for something to be offended at. No less, no more.

I can see that they're busting every bodies balls over guns now

The American gun debate has always existed, and both sides have always been retarded.

>no more

There was national uproar over an attempted suicide that resulted in a Tom Hanks movie.

What movie?

Mazes and Monsters. It's hilarious.

What's your favourite spell to cast on innocent bystanders?

She's a terrible cleric.

youtube.com/watch?v=nFIWUYr0n10&feature=youtu.be

and they say state raised children are wrong.

I usually use "the live long and have a happy life" mantra on passerby's.

youtube.com/watch?v=subQrEPKytA

Jon Tron Did a video about it.

Bigby's Grasping Palm.

Chick Tracks
chick.com/reading/tracts/0046/0046_01.asp?Store=True

In some shots where they're imitating the movie the production quality is sort of comparable. Heh.

Fox News started in 1996. user

>For example, that's why circumcision is so popular there even though that's supposed to be a Jewish tradition; lot of well-meaning religious kooks who abused people's ignorance by promoting it as a legitimate medical operation, in order to "cure" the "soul-destroying evil" of masturbation.

And it was specifically the guy that Kelloggs cereal is named after.

Reminder that cornflakes were invented to be a boring and exhausting food, so you'd expend all your energy on eating them and not have any for masturbating.

>I used the mind bondage spell on my father
hot

That's why you eat frosted flakes

Most anons in this thread are completely neglecting to mention that the D&D satanic scare was part of a larger social phenomena in the US known now as the "Satanic Panic."

vox.com/2016/10/30/13413864/satanic-panic-ritual-abuse-history-explained

He was so uncomfortable with sex in any form that he never had relations with his own wife. They slept in separate beds/

It was a different time when he was raised.

I've heard a dozen different iterations of this myth.

>imaginary female trouble

That would admit probably 70% of this website.

That's some wholesome spellcasting, user.

I'm proud of you.

Wait, why is it Tobacco AND masturbation?

>politics

I know most people didn't give a shit about politics back then, but wut

...

This.

>people didn't give a shit about politics back then
>reconstruction
>votes for women
Yeah nothing to be mad about. I'm sure everything was calm as fuck.

I was going by my country

>I was going by my country
>his country isn't America
>still thinks it matters or is relevant to the conversation
topkek

Don't mix em kids.

This.

One of our players brought the girlfriend to play, their first character was a Lizardfolk barbarian, they butchered and ate every humanoid we killed, and insisted on doing that to every NPC we met

Also I lost count on how many times I reminded them to declare rage, or that they should reckless attack because we are in the underdark and they have no darkvision

This may sound weird but I really enjoy darkest Dungeons as a drama. My take away was that sometimes in life your friends, as much as you may love them, might have issues that are far beyond fixing.

Also graham crackers were invented to taste so good that your sinful, carnal desires would be sated by them.

Megachurches creep me right the fuck out. Always feels like a cult of personality wearing the freshly flayed skin of somebody's faith...

>gunshot wound
Well maybe if it was in the head
>shooting of daughter
How did that end with you in a mental institution and not hanged?
>snuff eating for 2 years
You're not supposed to EAT snuff
>seduction and disappointment
By that do they mean seducing people and feeling unfulfilled or being shitty at seduction?
>time of life
That is hilariously vague
>Laziness
Eh I'll complain about this later

>Always feels like a cult of personality wearing the freshly flayed skin of somebody's faith...
It feels that way because that's exactly what they are.

There needs to be a provision in the tax exemption laws that megachurches lose their exemption, but no one will ever fucking touch it because "hurr durr war on relijun."

Remember, Kanna is probably older than most humans, dragons just live a stupidly long time so she's a kid in dragon terms.

I do but given my group's current steady composition of previous members of a community college's board game club who meet privately I do not see our gender ratios changing... ever. I do sometimes wonder what it would be like to pursue a relationship with a woman whose interests lined-up well with my own...

>There needs to be a provision in the tax exemption laws that megachurches lose their exemption, but no one will ever fucking touch it because "hurr durr war on relijun."
This is depressingly true, user. I'm all for tax exemption for small churches and temples, whatever religion, but when the people at the top of those megachurches are making tons of money, it's time to start fucking paying taxes on your business like everyone else.

Color Spray.

I think the shooting of daughter refers to being locked up BECAUSE someone shot their daughter.

Tax the Vatican then. A megachurch is literally nothing more than a church with more than 2,000 members but specifically excluding non-Protestant denominations - and usually excluding anything non-evangelical.

And the millennials bitch about racism, misogyny and all the first world shit.

For clarity's sake: the movie is a parody, in that rare form of parody where they don't actually have to make fun of anything, because the material inherently mocks itself, so all the parody has to do is perform it straight.

They couldn't put a big South Park style "This Is What Christians Actually Believe" line across the bottom because Jack Chick legitimately believed they were doing it in good faith, and would've withdrawn if he realized it was a mockery.

Wait till more of them get teenage kids.

>Tax the Vatican then

Um.. user the Vatican is it's own country, that's like saying "why don't we tax France?"

Strictly speaking you'd be taxing their American subsidiaries or applying a tariff.

Tell him to play paladin.

This is exactly the kind of stupid that allows the megachurches to thrive.

Why should Catholic churches go untaxed?

>Pulling described D&D as "a fantasy role-playing game which uses demonology, witchcraft, voodoo, murder, rape, blasphemy, suicide, assassination, insanity, sex perversion, homosexuality, prostitution, satanic type rituals, gambling, barbarism, cannibalism, sadism, desecration, demon summoning, necromantics, divination and other teachings".
Why can't actual D&D be like that? I feel ripped off.

Because they hold a good deal of art and culture.

Something protestants aside from blach church choirs don't.

Well, why don't we tax France?

>wanting megachurches and other religious organizations to lobby government
Leaving them be would be a better option

>implying they don't already
It's like you don't even America

>implying they don't already do that

At least getting some money would help

Same mind.

There is always an equivalent.

...

youtube.com/watch?v=WO0XSreGVHY

Yes look at how well it went for you. The least memorable of traitor legions. I mean thousand sons are atleast like 3rd or 4th coolest.

The irony about this shit is that the ones complaining about players believing the "game is real" were the ones who actually believed it was real.

The Steam Tunnel Incident
youtube.com/watch?v=Bojy9SjywFY

Sex and D&D
youtube.com/watch?v=NF8cDyiTnWE

>feels like a cult of personality wearing the freshly flayed skin of somebody's faith...
Whoa. I have to use that phrase someday. Consider it remembered.