The archery contest goes awry when ______________

...

>The beggar fires an arrow through a rich boy's throat.

>The queen, high as balls on psychedelic venom, climbs from the royal balcony and demands she be permitted to compete. Halfway through her demonstration, she suddenly begins attacking spectators and contestants alike, screaming about demonic possession.
>Code Geass season 1

When OP sounds suspiciously like Cards Against Humanity.

Some days you just have to respect the classics

....the winner of an all female archery contest turns out to be a man in disguise

>that one faggot from down by the docks attempts to launch a lance via bow and accidentally takes the queens eye out, thus ruining the whole day for everyone.

>she grabs my shaft instead of an arrow!

>She MEANT to grab your shaft instead of the arrow
>She then nocks you on her bow and fires you dick first into the spread legs of her equally hot twin sister before the entire fiefdom
>She is then arrested for devilworship when she cried out mid-you-arrow-flight "Satan, guide this cock!"

that does sound like it would lead to some real shit.

You don't fire a bow.

somebody whips out a gun

>an arrow shot by a contestant goes off due to the wind, killing the heir to the throne sitting in the stands, only for him to melt into his true form: a mimic.

HE SPLIT ROBIN'S ARROW IN TWAIN

>you don't fire a gun

>The arrow then melts into its true form: The heir, cackling madly.

>Everyone are too uncomfortable to continue with the compitition

>suddenly a dwarf drunkenly yells "Im competin ya fucks"
>Brings out a fucking catapult
>the tree is gone
>the judge is a puddle of goo
>but at least he had a decent inheritance to give to his kid

A wandering human seduces all the elves, even the men, ESPECIALLY the men.

>the barbarian demands to be allowed to compete with thrown weapons

The prize has been stolen by the local priest, who protests against archery for religious reasons. Namely, that his adopted daughter is participating rather than cleaning the altar or doing her other chores.

You used to.

It's OK, though, the script says Robin gets another shot.

The prince royal misses every shot he takes, and then spends the rest of the competition sulkily busting every contestant on any possible breach of the rules or laws, trying to disqualify everyone because he can't handle not winning. The players have to either persuade him to fuck off or out-autism him to save the competition without causing a major incident.

A highly skilled competitor who has completely blown the competition out of the water declares he has one last trick to display to the adoring crowd.
He notches an arrow, aims directly into the air and lets lose. The crowd waits in confused anticipation, but the arrow does not come back down.
The judge tasks your party with finding out exactly what the fuck is going on.

>the notorious bandit revealed herself to be a trap

Some bizarre blue box appears out of nowhere in the middle of the field, and some strangely dressed foreigner and his scantily clad female accomplice come out jabbering nonsense about carab beans, possibly preparing some awful spell. The bishop immediately demands their arrest, as they are clearly foul sorcerers.

The winner was discovered to be a psion who used his telekinesis to win

The prize was just resting in his account, he was going to give it back eventually

>the mage demands to be allowed to compete because if the spell has the word arrow in its name it must be a form of archery

>Bullets
>Filled with highly flammable powder
>you don't fire a gun
Uhh, user?

>>A highly skilled competitor who has completely blown the competition out of the water declares he has one last trick to display to the adoring crowd.
>He notches an arrow, aims directly into the air and lets lose. The crowd waits in confused anticipation, until the arrow falls and pierces the man's skull, killing him instantly.
>The players are charged with finding out why the successful and usually cheerful man was driven to suicide, as the noble running the competition wants revenge on whatever ruined the days events
Possible reasons: Spiteful wife about to destroy the man with a brutal divorce and built with false allegations(and then get to see if the players step in when the noble orders her executed), Despair demon is on the loose in the town and now is looking for a new victim, organised crime ring has manufactured debt against the man and his family so he killed himself thinking it would spare his family(it wont, now the criminals want the widow to earn them money through... less than reputable means), ect

A new contestant comes up.

You uh, you got some stuff you need to work through my dude?

please no

the Fire Nation attacked

>the archer thought they could dump STR and can't even string the bow

>the rules decree a standard bow must be used to keep things fair, and the party archer has to forgo their trusty +2 Longbow of Very Obviously Magicness to compete

Timothy, the village champion, lets out a fart most pungent, such that nobody can stand in the shooting area without retching from the stench. He does so shortly after his own shot, leading people to suspect it was a deliberate form of cheating.

The competition is reduced to two finalists, both clearly in disguise. In a dramatic moment before his shot, the first takes off his Mark Twain getup to reveal himself to be Robin Hood. The second, in response, also takes off his disguise. It's another Robin Hood.

All other competitors remove their disguise. They are also robin hood. As is the audience, and Maid Marien. And Prince John.

And you.

Are we all the same Robin Hood, or is it an all-star cast of Prince of Thieves, Men in Tights, Disney, etc?

>everybody is different Robin Hood
>except for you, you are the same one

I got your reference user.

PLEASE NO

>the arrows change back to their original human forms.

This guy!

>The archery contest goes awry when...

The contest suppliers send spare g-strings instead of spare bow strings.

Fuck off with your semantics, you know damn well what he meant.

That he set his bow on fire, obviously

>You get a shaft in the bum.

>The local wizard, who was previously hired to inspect each and every bow being used in the event, secretly enchants them to always miss their targets.
>Everyone involved ends up looking like damn fools.

No one participates

>The archery contest goes awry when the judge teleports behind the first contestant and draws his katana, a sword that's been folded over 10,000 times and can easily bisect solid slabs of steel with a simple vertical slash.
>psssh nothin' personnel, kid

>the targets arrive by portals from noone knows where and fight back

>The moose wins

> The competitor was two gnomes in a big coat
> Every shot was an illusion

>pissed off archdruid rampantly casting Sticks to Snakes