Be me

>be me
>currently filing for divorce, and discussing shared properties with my lawyer
>soon-to-be-ex's lawyer drops a steamy load on the table
>she found my backup thumbdrives in our safe a while back
>thought I might have been hiding pr0n/CP, but discovered keys to crypto and wasn't sure what they exactly were
>shrug.jpg at the time
>has heard now how valuable they are now, and remembered
>mfw they are fighting to relabel it now as "joint property"

Veeky Forums, she can't have any of my crypto...... I purchased this with MY own separate account, not our joint account.

What the hell do I do?

Recreate wallet with your seed key and move it to a different wallet

Obviously this

this and claim you got hacked

I've thought about that, but they'll know I moved it to hide it. Won't that just make me look worse, and piss of the hornet's nest?

ask your lawyer but i mean there is no way to prove it was you that moved it and that you didnt get hacked

Surely you're not going to listen to anyone on here over your lawyer. LARP Score: 4/10

Do they actually know how much you have, or just that it exists? If it's the latter, just transfer a large share out and leave some for sacrificial halving. Better to lose 5% than 50%.

It’s not stirring the hornets nest if you have money to pay your lawyer

If you don’t have money, however..

This is the third "my gf/wife has found my private keys and wants to fuck me" thread Ive seen today
Stop it!

Move to Saint Kitts and renounce your current citizenship.

the main advantage of crypto...
move 80% of it and act like that's all you've ever had.

I could transfer it out, and say I invested everything in BitConnect...

I don't know if the Court will want proof to verify where I transferred everything.

My Lawyer knows dill about crypto... She does, too. So, I could probably get away with hiding most of it. Maybe just give her a small percentage just to get them off my dick.

Lol you can always use shapeshift for a premium and get yourself some dash then do private send and lastly a monero swap if you are that paranoid. They won't know what hit them.

>leaving private keys on an unencrypted usb
you deserve to lose it desu
i left a usb with keys worth millions at my now insane cunt ex's house, but they're encrypted with multiple algos. whenever i see her my levels of smug are fucking interplanetary because i was pretty much dirt poor when we broke up but now i'm balling fucking hard and just knowing that wealth is so close but so far from her grasp is an amazing feeling.

monero my friend!

>I've thought about that, but they'll know I moved it to hide it
and you'd know if you had been hacked
>start up a fresh account on binance from a burner email
>transfer everything there
>buy monero
>dump into wallet you've encrypted the keys for
simple
it's what would happen if you were hacked anyway

No because you're innocent until proven guilty and theyl'l never prove you control the account you moved it to.

Offer her 10%, say you have an idea of the guy who took it (some homeless guy) and youl'l suck his dick to get it back and give her 10% if she drops everything.

Else, she gets 0, you possibly go to jail.

Transfer it to Monero, it was literally made for shit like this

Well for one it depends on your state. Separate property state that might work but a joint property state it doesn't matter if you bought it with a separate account.

So legally, you might be fucked.

Practically, however, crpypto is still pretty new and in all likelihood you will be the only one in this situation that knows what it is and how the fuck to use it. I can't imagine there would be much stopping you from transferring your substantial holdings to an e-wallet while leaving a small amount in shitter alt-coins that you can blame for the discrepancy. It could bite you in the ass if you get found out.

Also, I hope you didn't give her the actual $$ amounts you invested

California. There's a shit ton of laws in place to financial support exs....

Yeah, I'm just going to use shapeshift into Monero, and leave a small percentage behind. Offer to 'pay' out in cash, or transfer her the 15% I kept.

Both lawyers and her have NO idea what they are talking about, and it's pretty obvious. Mine was looking stuff up when he called me. I doubt anyone will put in much research to get any idea what is going on. She just wants more money after the separation...

Fake your own death. Except skip the faking it part and actually kill yourself. You goddamn LARPing faggot.

>kill yourself

...and lose all of my crypto. Fuck off.

Your best bet is to do something like that but leave a small amount (not small enough to garner too much suspicion though) in the account and tell them you lost it in some alt-coins.

larp