Recipe calls for a can of x

Standard cans contain 240g of cooked beans.
I mean, you're not going to cook up such a small amount of beans for a recipe anyway, right.
The water content depends on the variety but what you want to do is calculate the ratio of the calories between dry and canned and just multiply your dry bean by that.

she's in a "date" with simon pegg who brought her along so he can show her off to his ex

it's a funny movie you fucking mysoginist

What I want is for people to not use fucking canned beans so I don't have to calculate shit.

I think the premise of that movie is that she's pretending to be his blind date, so she'd sort of have it coming, yeah.

What movie?

>recipe calls for pre-made bread

Man Up (2015)

why do tall, masculine, brunette women turn me on so much?

Canned beans are great, not everybody has time to boil dry beans to shit for hours and then somehow portion them and freeze them, wasting valuable space

>I only use fresh food from my garden or that I hunted myself with hand made tools

>3 tablespoons
>2/8 of a cup

I bet the same retard came up with these measurements as with feet, inches and whathaveyou.

I still find it difficult to follow American recipes because of the cups thing.

>Not putting beans in water overnight.

>she

That's a trap

>hating canned veggies
>hating canned fruits

why?

Sorry that I have no clue how to make beef consomme, oh wise Lord of the culinary arts.

But just soaking beans doesn't get them to the same consistency. You have to rinse cook and let sit for several hours before they are good

1 cup is usually the size of a tea/coffee mug, that's what I use when I don't have any clean measuring tools around,

americans are fucking stupid

>2016
>still using recipes
Well I guess it's okay if your IQ is below 90, but otherwise you have no real excuse

>inb4 banking
>implying I don't make up recipes on the spot
I just made some fantastic vegan peanutbutter banana cookies.

No I'm not vegan, I just happened to be out of butter and eggs but was craving some cookies.

>t. someone whose never cooked beans

>tfw I did this for a summer
>tfw I will never be 17 again

not everyone is gonna have a food scale to weigh on

>recipe calls for prepackaged cuts of meat

>recipe doesn't specify reference densities for each ingredient
>recipe doesn't specify at what temperature (Kelvin, not Celsius, and definitely not Fahren-fuck-me-in-the-ass) the measurements were taken at
>recipe doesn't specify what instrument was used to take measurements
>recipe doesn't specify the pressures of the room, on the inside of the oven, whether the day was sunny, overcast, cloudy, raining, or even storming on the day of cooking
>recipe doesn't specify the lunar phase, the r, theta, and phi planetary polar coordinates of the cooking location, along with reference latitude and longitude, or contact their local meteorologist to inquire about the positioning of significant celestial bodies
>recipe doesn't specify whether the animal sacrifices were good and if the auspices were acceptable or if a slave boy had to be killed with a blunt instrument to please the Sumerian gods of deboned chicken
>recipe doesn't specify whether the rice is cooked or dry when measured

GOD DAMMIT ITS NOT HARD TO WRITE THIS SHIT DOWN!

>following recipe for masala chicken
>recipe calls for a can of tomato puree
Like how large? fuck. tomato puree comes in sizes of 90ml, 200ml, 450ml, 950ml and 1.4L. I used the 950ml can and it tasted like tomato soup. fucking shit.

>recipe calls for a pound of beef
>doesnt specify
>pound weight
>pound mass
>British pound
>Troy pound
>From pound town
>WTF man?

Well now you know to use either the 450 or the 200, learn from your mistakes.

That's mostly because a kitchen scale is considered drug paraphernalia, the possession of which is a great way to end up in prison.

Use these, it doesn't matter.

you can do it, professor utonium. i believe in you.

>recipe calls for one clove of garlic

One clove is never enough, unless its how to cut a clove of garlic. Even then it should call for at least three cloves.

I will always use the canned versions of beans for chili. It's too cheap and too convenient not to. It's the meat and spices that I really care about anyway.

>recipe claims "from scratch"
>first step isn't creating the universe

>recipe calls for bone stock
>not raising a cow from birth and slaughtering it

>raising a cow from birth
your mother managed to accomplish that.

stop bullying me pls

>raising a cow from birth
>stop bullying me
>bullying me
>bullying
>bull

>Not personally inseminating the cow and then devouring you ungodly bastard offspring

>he thinks creating the universe comes before willing the self into a semi-tangible reality
you probably use canned stock, too

>Look up recipe online
>Normally people would do it with X, but I do it with Y and it turns out great
>It doesn't turn out great

If I'm cooking something from "scratch", I find the only way I'm really satisfied is by setting up an accurate simulation of the universe, and letting it run up until our current time such that everything in the simulated universe is the same as our universe but in the simulation I have cooked the item in question. It takes a few goes to get right.

Why'd you pour in the whole thing, you could have done a quarter of the can, and if needed, added more to suit your tastes.

Ladies and gentlemen: america.

>why do tall, masculine, brunette women turn me on so much?
'cos they look like tall, masculine, brunette men

I dunno about you guys, but I struggle weighing liquids...

>put bowl on scale
>note bowl mass
>alternatively calibrate scale to be zero with bowl
>pour liquid into bowl
>substract bowl mass if option 1

>recipe

>recipe calls for water
>not synthesizing H2 and O

best thread for today

Name one except soup

Name one except bread and butter pudding

You should just keep an empty can of beans and use it as a measuring cup

>Name one except bread and butter pudding

Plenty. Stuffing, croutons, french onion soup...

How is it possible that you're into cooking enough to prepare your own beans yet you are incapable of estimating size/volume for recipes?

>> weather reports in recipes

You say this mockingly, but somewhere we have a box of old index card recipes from one of my aunts that included something like an early version of bakers percentages for the ingredients, complete with adjustments for rainy days and dry weather.

Because up is privileged to live near fertile lands.

How come? A cup is just 200 ml.

Converting to different measurements is difficult for yurop.

If it isn't in something they understand, they just turn red and start shaking their fist and babbling about america.

>recipe doesn't include attached kitchen blueprints or overseer recommendations

>recipe for tomato sauce
>need can of tomato sauce to put in tomato sauce

Its 250ml

hey, uh guys

shut the fuck up

I honestly have a real 'tic' when it comes to using canned ingredients of any kind. I just can't do it. No matter what the recipe even if it calls for something like canned tomato which is perfectly good.

I've tried so, so hard to get over this fucking fear. I spent $20 on San Marzano tinned tomatoes to use in recipes and ended up having a breakdown halfway through cooking myself some Shakshuka. Ended up walking into the street at fucking 11pm in my pajamas and throwing the tins of tomato onto the floor until they exploded while making loud roaring noises because I felt I had to release my inner chef again after using pre canned produce.

I wish I didn't have this tic because regular tomato is much more expensive and doesn't last as long. It also means I have to avoid recipes using things like coconut milk due to sheer inconvience.

are you okay with jars?

maybe try therapy. it's not just for psychopaths.

You're an idiot. There's nothing wrong with using canned products when the fresh product is out of season. Just make sure you buy quality certified stuff and it's good to use.

You seem like the kind of person to tell others how to live and people find out you're a furry or some other shit.

>blackolivesmatter.jpg

Do you have OCD? I do and it fucking sucks. A few days ago I mentally freaked out because my pan had a scratch on it, my mind instantly registered it as "not a pan" anymore.