Hey user, welcome to our new dive bar called

>Hey user, welcome to our new dive bar called
Destination Doux No.12... We are located on skid row which is slowly turning into the hot spot in our awesome city..


>We serve craft cocktails and vegan grilled cheeses. We also have burlesque on Tuesday nights with our local female roller derby chapter.

>What can i get you? and don't forget to tip our cocktail waitresses.

Other urls found in this thread:

npr.org/sections/thesalt/2014/10/21/357624984/can-hand-cut-artisanal-ice-make-your-cocktail-that-much-better
businessinsider.com/artisanal-ice-making-2014-3
lmgtfy.com/?q=male roller derby
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

>craft cocktails
>roller derby
Where is this? Paducah? Laramie?

You guys gotten over mojitos yet?

>female roller derby

as opposed to?

I bet ax throwing is still big where OP is.

male roller derby.

>Order an old fashioned
>they top it up with soda water
into the trash with you, hipster bar

>vegan
>grilled cheese

I'd do a 360 and nope the fuck out of there

>labels self "dive bar"

why??

I'll have a jack and coke, no coke

>it's another hilariously out of touch shut-in autist rails against 'hipsters' and trends from 10-15 years ago thread

A gun with which to kill myself and you, petulant child

do you guys do the freak shakes? i really wanted to try one of those they look soooo crazy

I'll have a water, please.

If you haven't been out of the house lately, places like these have only gotten worse recently.

The term has an air of authenticity about it.

You know what fuck it I'll have the vegan grilled cheese. I want to see how somebody can turn an item with a fucking dairy product in the name in it into a vegan product.

Crack me open a bear pls

flaming-hipster-virgin detected

I would kill. Do places really do that?

WOOD make more sense if the guy had a red-black square flanel shirt on.

enjoy your curdled soy milk

Veeky Forums why are we here? I coulda gotten us a rez at Dorsia.

Pro tip: if you call yourself a dive bar, you're not a dive bar.

ahahaa

ahahahahahaha

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA

*hangs phone*

lol there's this "dive bar" near me that's only open from 8-2 every night and it brings in all the people who wear 150 dollar punk rock coats so they can spend 6 dollars on a pbr tallboy. it's the most bizarre and pointless place I've ever been to. It's like it's there for people explicitly to fail to realize the point of dive bars or counter culture.

and what it actually looks like

>Doux
Retard.

I once dated a posh girl who took me to a "dive bar" to impress me, and it was a fucking wetherspoons. I took her to an actually rough pub, and she wanted to leave before she'd even finished her drink. I think that was something of a reality check for her.

>op so out of touch that he's complaining about trends that peaked a decade ago
>I'm the one that hasn't gone outside
hello flyovers

Of course the most try-hard looking motherfucker in that pic would of course be the bassist.

fucking wetherspoons man, had to go to one of those for lunch at comic con and it was fucking £4 a pint, because they'd adjusted it for the weekend. bastards.

They adjust there prices to the location, 'Spoons in Central London, not cheap, but cheaper than the competition. There is a Samuel Smiths pub in Pimlico, it's £5+ a pint m8.

Wetherspoons basically saved pubs from extinction,they may be same-y and a bit corporate but thank God they exist. All those local-yokel places and the pubs-that-time-forget are just history nowadays.

/thread, honestly

Who the fuck cares? Faux-authentic anti-hipsters are literally the same as hipsters. It's all about trying to give an impression of a certain personality.

I'll try the "Sraicha Bacon IPA" please

>fat, tryhard bass player leering at girls

toppest kek

i dunno man if i go into a """""dive bar""""" and the tattooed beardo '''''punk''''' '''''rock''''' barman doesn't react when i order 'two pints of lager and a packet of crisps, please' i question the authenticity of the establishment.

And your creamy avocado chipotle dip for the in-house tortilla chips

>this is the city I live in
Whatever beer is most decent for the price.

I took my girlfriend to a dive bar in my redneck poor shithole hometown. Some guy literally said "look at the little Chinese girl" within 5 minutes of us being there (she isn't Chinese).

Air thick with cig smoke, everyone smoking inside.

>meet guy from my highschool
>in the military now
>this is my girlfriend of 6 months
>we are getting married
>"the benefits are really good"
>lets do jello shots
>jello shots are tequila
>still had a pretty good night

still had a pretty good time and it was hilarious watching my upper middle class girlfriend experience poor white trash for the first time.

>go to google images
>type in roller derby
>not one single picture of a male found

>girlfriend of 6 months
>we are getting married

Oh yes and I almost forgot, please douse my in-house home-cut fries in truffle oil, my good sir.

its fucking rampant in the military man. white trash flocks to anyone in the military so they can get a "free house, free healthcare and steady paycheck" to be a NEET. guy gets deployed and they just fuck around and have a bunch of bastard kids until the eventual divorce

"dive bars" tip, if no-ones ever been glassed in your pub you can't call it a dive bar. Real rough pubs are scary. They're not fun to be in unless you know everyone there. Went in the EDL pub in my town by accident once. was immediately told to get out cos my (spanish) friend looks like a paki.

The men fall for this trap because they get paid more and are able to get out of the barracks.

> was immediately told to get out cos my (spanish) friend looks like a paki.

i want THIS meme to die

just give me my """"""""""pommes frites"""""""""" with some herbs and a bit of grated parm and fuck off with the truffle oil.

Unless you guys use artisanal, locally crafted ice then I'm not about to start patronizing you

npr.org/sections/thesalt/2014/10/21/357624984/can-hand-cut-artisanal-ice-make-your-cocktail-that-much-better

businessinsider.com/artisanal-ice-making-2014-3

>I'm not about to start patronizing you

IT HAS MORE THAN ONE DEFINITION

>live in "hipster" part of city
>roommate and property manager both have sleeve tatts, beards, and play music in punk bands

faggets

looks like a swell time

>does a 360 turn and walk out.

For hipster bernie supporters to go to after their sociology class and complain about the rich while sipping15 dollar craft cocktails and post from their iphones.

Meanwhile the dive bar down the road will serve ya a pabts and burbon for 5 bucks while people got off work from their job and some george thirgood is playing and people are laughing but you sip your bear enjoying the game

I live in a shitty part of vegas and this just happened.
Also in a poor mexican part of reno popped up with craft cocktails.

I don't see any $150 punk rock coats

so what's the new in, cultural expert?

Pizza.

>hipster

le sigh

“Hipster” is a term co-opted for use as a meaningless pejorative in order to vaguely call someone else’s authenticity into question and, by extension, claim authenticity for yourself.

It serves no conversational function and imparts no information, save for indicating the opinions and preferences of the speaker.

Meanwhile, a market myth has sprung up around the term, as well as a cultural bogeyman consisting of elusive white 20-somethings who wear certain clothes (but no one will agree on what), listen to certain music (no one can agree on this either), and act a certain way (you’ve probably sensed the pattern on your own).

You can’t define what “that kind of behavior or fashion or lifestyle” actually is, nor will you ever be able to. That’s because you don’t use “hipster” to describe an actual group of people, but to describe a fictional stereotype that is an outlet for literally anything that annoys you.

The twist, of course, is that if it weren’t for your own insecurities, nothing that a “hipster” could do or wear would ever affect you emotionally. But you are insecure about your own authenticity - “Do I wear what I wear because I want to? Do I listen to my music because I truly like it? I’m certainly not like those filthy hipsters!” - so you project those feelings.

Suffice it to say, no one self-identifies as a hipster; the term is always applied to an Other, to separate the authentic Us from the inauthentic, “ironic” Them.

>found the angry hipster
>dat projecting
The fact you see kids of rich parents trying to part into a lower middle class with over priced obsecure alcohol and clothes. Have you ever been on lower rungs of economic society? They don't ride on fixed gear bicycles to sip craft cocktales while mumford and sons is playing at their local (insert pretentious name) from their mixologist.

>order old fashioned
>muddles an orange wedge with some whiskey in a tumbler glass
>tops with tonic and plunks a straw in there
Can't get a god damn cocktail anywhere in this town.

Trends from 10-15 years ago that still continue to this day. That being said I live in a college town and it's disgustingly intolerably liberal, and I lean left on most social issues but holy fuck it's like every tumblr stereotype mixed with fedora stereotypes mixed with smelly crustpunks that listen to third wave ska for some reason. The argument could be made that if one took the time get to know them they might actually be cool people but for the most part the facade is so thick that the effort required far outweighs the gain.

The exception is is midtown, but you only go there if you want to fuck drunk 6/10 sorority girls and/or voluntarily/involuntarily fight frat boys.

There's a really good cocktail lounge in my town, but every drink runs you about $15.

They do a really great ramos gin fizz though. Definitely worth the money, but an Old Fashioned is so easy to do at home that that's what I usually do.

>orange in a old fashion.
What the literal fuck?

I once had someone drag me out to a "dive/rockabilly bar" in the city. We took a one hour train ride...to get $3 tallboys of PBR. This place wasn't even a good bar, let alone a dive bar.

Luckily she made up for it another night by taking us to a lovely tiki bar that I still think about pretty regularly.

Found out there's a tiki bar in the city I'm living currently, pretty keen to go

Tiki bars are my favorite type of bars. They're always fun as hell.

The hipster bar near me has the best mac and cheese I've ever had. They have this coleslaw made with seaweed or something that is excellent. The problem is they're good and they know it so they act pretentious.

>a water
>a
>water

Yeah, they're banging some chad while your risking your life in Afghanistan or some other shithole, earning a few dollars, just to have the bitch spend it all. Fucking insane.

i would say most hipsters are lower middle class desu

>hipster faggot detected

>le
stopped reading there

Seems like a place I would get into an argument with someone named Josh and his girlfriend sunflower over Bernie Sanders or changing the music from ambient noise to something oppressive like top 5 music.

>le sigh

They really arent. A lot are of upper middle white neighborhoods.

Or a band with a v for a u in a name.
They probably argue who loves their bull more.

dude im an oregonian & i think youre a faggot

>People I don't like should stop existing in this universe that was made just for me!
>Everyone should have my tastes and my sensibilities!

stfu you idiot

lmgtfy.com/?q=male roller derby
:)

...

>Mommy took me to this weird place with a funny bearded man for lunch
>The tendies didn't taste like Tyson's
>They used some weird cheese that didn't come in individually wrapped slices for my grilled cheese, and it smelled funny.
>They didn't have a programmable soda fountain, and mommy made me actually talk to the waitress if I wanted something to drink.
>The tables didn't have the restaurant mascots painted on it
>My meal didn't come with a toy
>They didn't even have a playplace.
>Now that we're home, I'm going to bitch about it on Veeky Forums.

>if I want to look like a genderless hobo I should expect not to be judged and ridiculed

Seriously, though, a ballpit in a pub sounds like a really great idea. That would be fun as fuck.

I agree, except for all the puke and urine that will wind up in it.

>she isn't chinese

What is she?

thats exactly what i was going to say

two boilermakers & a negroni, then into the ball pit

itll be fine

>tonight at eleven: authorities discovered a man presumed dead was, in fact, passed out at the bottom of Saxons Bar & Grills new ballpit with a stuffed bear & a bottle of scotch

Do you guys have any IPAs on tap?

A body pillow.

>sip your bear

Is there a rainbow flag out front?

...

Give me a fucking beer goddammit

It's not a divebar unless you have an underlying awareness that you might get stabbed for stepping out of line. not so subtle drug dealing and gambling rackets are also a sign.

pls no bully user!

just like normal ballpits then

I have to say that for however annoying these hipster-dipster places can be, they often serve some of the best food and drinks. Esp if you live in a southern city dominated by shit-tier chain restaurants like I do. Not to say that there isn't fantastic non-hipster southern fare out there (quite the opposite)---but it's still a nice change from time to time. Though gentrification kind of sucks too I guess

...

>Nothing, thanks. I'm here to tell you that I invited all of the Somali homeless from the poor part of town to come panhandle and live next to your diverse bar. You're not racist are you? Good. I personally drove all of these men here, so they're going to be staying in your welcoming rich hipster neighborhood for a while, and trust me: If anyone tries to get them to leave or have the police relocate them, I'll be writing about your racist "whites only" abuse in the paper. Take care now kids.

If there's a hipster equivalent of a fedora, I can smell it coming off this faggot's post.

it's pasta you melts