Veeky Forums humor thread
Ck humor
Parker Morales
Aiden Brown
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Xavier Wilson
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Ethan Hughes
? it's just ground beef and a sweet potato
throw some veggies on the side and i'd eat that
Jordan Martin
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Jordan Martinez
lmao
Ian Rivera
Thats pretty good.
Angel Sanchez
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Adam Wilson
Does anybody have the one of user making steak and burning it?
Or when someone made Marie's italian tomato sauce
Blake Moore
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Lucas Gomez
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Luis Jones
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Nathaniel Lopez
a classic
Jeremiah Lewis
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Lucas Rogers
this one is the best
Jacob Campbell
>the closest thing I had to dress shoes
I'm fucking dead.
Jonathan Long
Does anyone have floor chicken?
Camden Nelson
Aaron White
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Elijah Williams
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Dylan Turner
Old favorite
I had been out drinking again tonight, it was all I could manage to unlock the door, stumble into the house, then relocking the door, before I stumbled over to the couch and passed out.
It was a dark and stormy night, amongst the raucous of howling wind and errant tree branches striking the house, the sound of the kitchen door's window pane being shattered could hardly be discerned. A gloved hand reaches through and fumbles with the lock before roughly shoving the door open. I remain asleep, oblivious to the outside world.
The figure inspects the interior further, missing my presence on the couch, he proceeds upstairs and down the hall. Reaching the master bedroom, the door is already open a crack, my wife was waiting for me. Entering the room, the figure moved carelessly and hit the dresser with his boot. My wife awakens startled and reaches for the lamp switch, turning it; light floods the room, revealing the gruff visage of the intruder. She screams, but the man is upon her swiftly, he muffles her cry with his hand, he grabs the metal lamp and bludgeons her repeatedly with it, only dropping it after several blows had been dealt. Stepping back, he is confronted with the deed, all he needed was a fix, something to sell, and all too quickly he had become a murderer.
He ran from the scene, with all the speed that he could, through the hall, down the stairs, past my still sleeping figure on the couch, through the kitchen door and out into the darkness.
I awoke approaching noon. Sitting there, rubbing the sleep from my eyes, I scolded myself. I had promised her I wouldn't go to the bar again this week. Getting up, I pass the kitchen archway without looking inside, I climb the stairs and walk down the hall, finally entering the master bedroom. The grisly scene unfurled before my eyes, the stark truth of it obvious even in my hung-over state: my wife had been killed in the most brutal fashion.
If there ever was a reason for an Egg McMuffin, this is it.
Andrew King
holy shit
Jacob Howard
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Isaiah Jones
Other old classics include Sogwich, MSG in Meat/Pain head, PHR Salt...Sceak, Angie. Man, Veeky Forums was funny back in the day.
Another favorite quote of mine:
Can you grow fruit indoors?
>>Your mom managed to.
Brandon Richardson
tl;dr
Bentley Bell
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Wyatt Collins
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Landon Murphy
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Gabriel Stewart
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Ethan Parker
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Leo Myers
Is this a men in black joke?
Evan Hernandez
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Kayden Butler
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Jose Gray
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Adrian Morris
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John Myers
whats wrong with this? two quarters make a half right?
Jonathan Long
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Jacob Diaz
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Henry Miller
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Justin Torres
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Chase Ward
are those prunes and cheerios?
I must say this one is lost on me even if I did laugh
Jason Walker
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Jordan Richardson
>steak, egg, and cheese biscuit
I hope he meant bagel. their biscuits suck
Jeremiah Bennett
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Ian Scott
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Eli Ramirez
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Evan Foster
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Adam Ward
>fucking with emotionally fragile 13 year olds and putting the idea in their head that strangers know where you live and could find you and kidnap you if they wanted to
Eli Fisher
No that's jalapeños Cheerios and cigarettes
Christian Green
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Austin Clark
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Adam Miller
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Jaxson Cox
Oh okay, thanks.
Oliver Stewart
Top notch.
Jacob Ramirez
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David Scott
Frenchfag here, i don't get it.
Why not say half of whatever a cup is.
The OP fucked up but i don't know where...
Jace Brooks
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Kevin Wright
2.25 cups
not 1/4 cup x2
Isaiah Campbell
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Jacob Edwards
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Henry Wilson
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Julian Cruz
I know this is a joke but my grandmother legit did this
Josiah Collins
1/4
Joseph Green
2/4
Carson Cruz
3/4
Daniel Adams
4/4
Oliver Watson
...oh, right.
thx
Caleb Parker
this is the world we live in senpai
Tyler James
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Nathan Robinson
I love jack
Zachary Richardson
checked
Anthony Miller
>he forgot to edit out a (You)
Charles Moore
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Jacob Wilson
>He never added a diet coke instead of 2 liter Dr Pepper
Wasted oppurtunity tbqh.
Zachary Green
beautiful
Parker Anderson
>people would bother doing this
shameful display
Christian Powell
nice digits user
Angel Thompson
Haha THATS RICH
Chase Harris
ty
Logan Wilson
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Robert Sanchez
Samefag. Fuck off. We're not buying your shit.
Sebastian Rivera
filename
Kevin Rivera
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Luis Diaz
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Jonathan Brooks
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Benjamin Mitchell
>that perfect circular hole
My fucking sides.
Joseph Jenkins
this is the least funny post I've ever seen because in includes both jack and cuckk
Gabriel Williams
>Nice try, I can use MS paint
Jack please go.
Julian Rivera
cuck meme is getting old i don't know how /pol/ is going to keep it up through november
Caleb Sullivan
people like you are ruining this board
Oliver Ortiz
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Ryan Hernandez
Stay mad, retard. You can't just force unfunny garbage like that.
Nicholas Peterson
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Xavier Sanchez
Man the harpoons!
Joseph Lewis
so not enough flour?
Leo Peterson
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James Adams
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Mason Lopez
haha
Evan Garcia
please be real
Lucas Cruz
2 slice toaster
what do you do when you only want one piece of toast?
throw in trash
a waste of perfectly good slice of bread
worst "invention" ever