It begins

It actually already began, but hey. Started at 20 pounds, trimmed approx 2 pounds.

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Bump

Couple bald spots, not a big deal. Salt and pepper (central texas, fuck off if you don't like it).

Smoking with oak, spritzing with homemade apple juice/apple cider vinegar mix. About 3 hours in.

Yum!

4 hours down, 13 to go. Added some more wood, and a quick spritz. After a 6 or so hours of smoking, just gonna let it ride to completion. Ribs will go in in about 3 hours.

Cook that shit good,
Eat it for me, enjoy it for me.
Don't get impatient, let it cook for the whole duration.
Savour the wait.

I smoke often, the wait is the best part.

And you're using oak 8====D~~~~

Anything else would be uncivilized.

Post progress pics when things heat up daddy

35 mins or so and I'll grab another pic.

Is this a brisket?

Yes

open it up and tenderise it with your cock

Enjoy your hot dogs and microwave fries

Only if you're circumcised, goy dick ruins the brisket

uh,what?
I usually spread the meaty lips open and sprinkle some seed on it then let my cock pound it

I believe you

update picupdate picupdate picupdate picupdate picupdate picupdate picupdate picupdate pic

Patience

Coming along nicely. Refilled the pan, sprayed it down. Nice bark is starting to appear.

That looks fkin gross af

It's barely a 1/3 of the way done. Once the bark fully takes, I would be surprised if you could still honestly say is looks gross.

Don't listen to that cuck, its beautiful

Aight. Ill wait and see

If you can stand the test of low and slow. 12 hours to go. After the next wetting, I'm just going to leave it be, then start on the ribs. 2 rack of pork, and a rack of beef.

Post pics of it all

Thats the plan, heres where we started.

Shit looks good, made ribs last night but the pork had no flavour so it just tasted like sauce : ^(

Been there. Sucks to put all the work in just to get shitty pig.

Hey OP, when you spritz it, are you trying to keep the meat soaked, or just damp? Do you want it to dry out between spritzinks?

Californian here, and this whole process is kind of mysterious to me, but I'm very intrigued

It's to help keep it moist and prevent burning. You want the outside to caramelize and not just be dried out.

Gettin there. Last round of smoke, maybe one more.

Beautiful

>texas knows how to barbecue meat now

since when

>goy dick ruins the brisket
oy vey I'm laughing

here come the updates

Brisket is looking good. Nice dark bark, slightly moist to the touch. Meat jiggles if you bump it. Moved it to the top shelf to make room for the ribs.

Beef ribs... Not much trimming to do here, just pull the membrane off the back.

Drizzle with olive oil, and coat with a decent layer of salt and pepper. Into the smoker they go.

Next up are the pork spare ribs. Same deal here. But we need to trim it up a bit.

On the back side, we cut the extra bit off where the burnt ends would come from, and remove the membrane. You'll see there is some membrane left, and thats fine so long as you get the top layer off. Oil it up, and its ready for rub.

>Meat jiggles if you bump it.

Fuuuuuuck I bet it does

This was an off the shelf rub, forget the name. Pretty much the basics, salt, pepper, garlic powder, onion powder. Lay it down a bit thicker than you would with beef and away it goes. I had to cut these in half to fit in the little smoker, but it wont really affect anything.

mmmm, the jiggle, and the deckle quivers.... getting aroused just thinking about it.

Back in an hour if the thread is still alive, ribs are gonna go for about 6 hours. Ill grab some shots as I spritz.

Post more, brisket is my fetish.

t. Texan.

As it comes along. Everything is still in the smoker.

Forgot to mention. For the pork were looking at a honey butter glaze. After about 4 hours I'll glaze it, wrap it, and throw it back in for the last hour or so.

Forgot to refill the water pan, so lucky you I had to crack it open again.

People who use their counter-tops as cutting boards are some of the trashiest, least classy people in the world. You can slap together whatever incredible brisket you want, the fact you started off by trimming a 20lb slab of meat on your counter completely undercuts your finished product.

This is Kraft Dinner cooking. This is TV-dinner shit. This is Steak-Umms and Hot Pockets.

Fuck off.

No, you fuck off.

There's literally nothing wrong with using a non-porous large surface to trim meat.

Sounds like someone doesn't clean their counters like a decent human being

Kill yourself

>Salt and pepper

do you hate flavor or just too lazy to come up with a good dry rub txfag?

also master race tennessee dry rub brisket reporting in.

I see there's a commercial break in the Duck Dynasty marathon. Go ahead you bunch of Cletuses, keep cutting shit on your countertop. And why not use the sink as a big ol mixing bowl? I mean shit, it's so easy to clean!

Hey while we're at it, why don't we steam clams in the dishwasher and use scissors to slice up pizza?

Fucking hicks.

b.but his bottom tier, cheap-ass uba tuba granite IS porous.

I would agree with you but our counters are sealed and cleanup was done with bleach, then hot soapy water. Clearly care was taken to prevent cross contamination as well as the cleanliness of the counter itself. Not sure why you are so mad though.

It's been sealed, dumbass.

It's not just raw granite.

Looks good. Would eat.

r'ly faggot?

>cleanup was done with bleach, then hot soapy water.

Cleaners can weaken the sealant, so even if you’ve sealed the countertop on schedule, rigorous cleaning (and cleaning agents) could compromise the sealant in spots without you even knowing it, I bet your shit is infested with raw meat jizz.

I might agree with you if I never resealed but we do every 6 months. You make a lot of assumptions.

>we do every 6 months

this from the guy that bought the cheapest granite on the market....I dont' think so Timmy, that's not how poor people operate.

There you go making assumptions again.

>be autistic retard
>at a barbecue with friends
>buddy preparing his famous brisket
>finally he brings it out, I can't wait
>go up to get a plate
>it's so fucking tender
>first bite, I'm in heaven
>buddy comes over and asks me how it is this time
>rave to him about the brisket, praise his skills
"Say buddy, I've always wondered, where do you get the space to prepare these huge pieces of meat?"
>"Oh I just clean my countertop and use it, it works great"
>eyes immediately shoot open
"What...what did you just say?"
>"Uh..heh..I said I just use my clean countertop to prepare the meat."
>i feel sick to my fucking stomach
>sit there in awkward silence for a few seconds
>rage is welling up within me
"You....YOU FUCKING DISGUSTING HICK!!"
>everybody turns to stare at me
>My face goes beet red
>Friend is speechless
"I uh uh...he-he used his countertop to prepare the brisket!!!"
"How disgusting right guys???"
>silence
>".....so?"
>sit there speechless for 5 minutes, whole party ruined by these fucking backwards hillbillies
>decide to leave, who else knows what these hicks did to the rest of the food
>storm out muttering stuff about hicks and hillbillies

you have cheap countertops thus you are poor. poor people are lazy therefore you do not seal the trailer park counters regularly; these are not assumptions they are facts.

...

kek

Pretty good summation of what this underage autist is doing.

Had a hearty chuckle.

>these are not assumptions they are facts
Do you work for MSNBC News?

Fuck off

> the implications will never be the same

>use scissors to slice up pizza
There is nothing wrong with this

fuck it's burned :/

>Salt and pepper
Not enough.

>Nice bark is starting to appear.
>nice bark
>spritzing
It is a bark, it isnt nice though.

ribs ready for wrapping. glazed them with honey butter and added a few squirts of cider vinegar/apple juice.

>using scissors to cut pizza
youtu.be/5SxN_U2H0Xc
You'll never be as cool as Cobra, though

>use the sink as a big mixing bowl
youtu.be/nHbajQ8U8Fw
Okay now that is some ghetto trash shit

Your brisket is looking really good, OP. Nice work. Cant wait to see the finished products. I did some smoking yesterday . I don't have a smoker but everything came out better than expected. I currently have a rib hangover, ate too many

Damn that looks good. I fucking forgot links... knew I was missing something.

>electric smoker

disgusting

and you call yourself a texan

Thanks. Those are Kiolbassa brand, made in San Antonio I think. Fellow Texan here
>this rain

I know I know. Patio isnt big enough to fit with I want.

What rain, its beautiful out there.

Looking good apart from the electric, OP. But, seriously offsets are difficult to master. I've only been satisfied with maybe 2-3 briskets out of the 2 dozen I've cooked on my offset. Miss the consistency of my WSM and not having to search for quality wood splits. My latest effort.

doesnt that black shit taste burnt? like coal or something?

I have a UDS which does the job really well for me. However my only complaint is that it is a 30gal drum so it only fits two briskets.

No, it is call bark and it is very tasty.

For the most part, no. It just tastes like heavy seasoning. The very end of the brisket (point closest to the fire) usually does get pretty charred/hardened and I throw it out. Protip: the more streamlined your brisket after trimming the less jagged/exposed edges have a chance to become burnt.

Well, the MES is good for small stuff, but I don't like halving my rib racks or folding a brisket. It's nice to be able to smoke something with little tending, but offset is the proper deal. I've been eyeing an old country, just havent pulled the trigger due to space concerns.

lol no, thats all the smokey/salty/peppery flavor

Time for a rest

Main event. Ribs pulled back a little more than I wanted, but wiggle/toothpick feel great.

yes i'll have a piece thank you

Do it, bro. I've been smoking a couple times per week since getting mine. It's basically managing a fire rather than cooking. I'm learning to waste less wood.

Let's see some slices, OP!

holy fucking shit...who is dat thick brown bunny in the top left?

>HE DOESN'T HAVE A 4FT LONG CUTTING BOARD WHAT AN INGRATE

retard

Was busy eating. Money shot.

>no smoke ring
How did you manage that?

godammit....we had to wait all this fucking time to see your dry ass fucking overcooked slab of ruined meat crumble under it's own weight?

you should be sorry.

I bet somone has accused you of burning the meat before, right?

I love those people.

Looks awesome Op