I work at a deli, AMA

No but a nigger can serve you

Maybe switch the first two but yeah

thank you for the good sandwich work y'all do, really saved my ass during 10pm night classes

ever have any bad accidents with slicing meat and shit?

Not when slicing, but I have cut my finger to the bone using a butcher knife. Cut away from yourself anons.

you ever beat yer meat?

I sometimes smack it around in the freezer. I especially love yelling really loud and cursing because no one can hear me

Have you ever thought about moving out of your parents house and getting a real job?

do you make fun of the customers if they get nervous and stutter as they place their order?

Most annoying thing to prepare?

Who are your most annoying customers?

What is the most popular meat, and when does that vary?

what is the most annoying thing to slice?

while aisles do you stare at all day?

Largest order you ever had to prepare?

Craziest Customer/order you ever had to deal with?

Longest shift you ever had to do?

>ladyboyz>brazillian>american/european

I hate the Brazilians.
Aye, aye, ayyyyye.

How is zabars still even relevant? It's like the sharper image of food

how does it feel to be permanently foreverially delitized? To be foreverially made out of bologna, ham and cheese? to have permanent freverially ketchup and mayo blood, and being ropemumified permanenty with strings of sausage and bologna?

Does anything get cleaned or is it s ticking time bomb for getting sick.

unless its literally mcdonalds with all the timers and shit you will always have that risk because employees ultimately do whatever they are in the mood to do

Old people are the worst

Honey turkey pretty much always

Thing bolonga, it's a good arm workout though

It's a deli there are none

We clean constantly

**thin

Also the one time I had to slice a certain mozzarella it got fucking everywhere but we don't supply that brand anymore

any fat people stories?

>fat old lady strolls up
>asks for chopped herring
>another deli boy cuts it
>she flips the fuck out because he isn't slicing it right
>comes behind the counter
>starts fucking screaming
>we all say she can't be back here and that we will call the police
>"YOU SHOULD CALL THE HERRING POLICE BECAUSE THIS IS A CRIME"
>she leaves

What's in the salad?

>fat family walks up to counter
>they eat everything in site including the little mexican guy that usually works in the back
>they leave

The end

Why old people?

not him but the deli I worked at old people were the worst. They always wanted their meats shaved, but good thing there was a slicer to automatically shave the meat for you. They'd also ask to put paper layers over the cheese so it wouldn't "stick" together. So if they wanted a pound you'd have to usually put 2 pieces of cheese on the paper, fold, repeat until it reached over a pound, then take a rare off of how many pieces of paper you used so they didn't get charged for it, but I never did that shit and always charged them. I also used to always give someone I know a good deal like if they bought something expensive I'd charge them for the least expensive item, usually Bologna or skinless turkey breast.

tare*

They're fucking nuts.

Not OP but I currently work at a deli where a ham planet comes in every single day and orders a 12' sub and a pound of ham

Is this you?

No but that gave me a hearty kek

still too smart for college?
your band will get that record contract, trust me

dude, you work in a deli
not real high on the skills ladder

Whats good in the deli?

Nah dude, not even.

American/European = Japanese 'newhalf' (deducting points because most JAV is censored) > Filipino trannies > any Asian that not Thai > Brazilian > Thai

Everything except weird shit like headcheese