Transporting alchohal into stadiums

Sup /sp/ here. I am tired of getting raped in the ass by stadium beer prices so I am thinking of taking a growler with me to funnel beer and chug in the parking lot before the game.

Would the beer get all fucked up if I put it in the trunk of my car. Would I get ass fucked if I cop pulled me over and found the growler full of beer in the trunk?

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I live in the desert and I dont think meme binoculars would keep shit cold very well. Also I think a growler would pass as a normal water bottle very well but I think a cop would fuck with me if he saw me drinking from binoculars

Just bring a water bottle full of vodka.

>growler
>chug
>parking lot
>trunk

translation please.

Growler - a lesbian
Chug - the sound a train makes
Parking lot - a sand area where people practice parkour
Trunk - an elephant's nose

There's a camera flask you can buy. You'll never get stopped by security.

in that case just tell the elephant to suck the beer into its trunk and they won't search it. then it can spray beer into your mouth during the game and you won't have to lift a finger.

You're definitely going to prison if the police catch you carrying beer, especially if you're completely sober. The beer will also likely become toxic very quickly.

Chug - chug
Parking lot - parking lot
Trunk - trunk
Growler - look at the fucking OP pic

Why take a jug of beer? Inject vodka into some oranges instead. Then it just looks like you're peeling and eating oranges during the game

>Inject vodka into some oranges instead.

I'm not OP, but I have done what you suggest and it's not very efficient. The problem is that you can only get so much vodka into each orange--and it's not much. Thus you'd need a fuckload of oranges to even get the slightest buzz.

>that guy that peels and eats oranges at a baseball game

Vodka eye drops, you will get fucked up fast with very little vodka

Get this you retard

It's called the beer belly

They won't let you. Security isn't stupid. No outside water bottles or really bottles of any kind.

Holy shit just fill a camelbak with whiskey or bring a flask or whatever, is this your first rodeo cowboy

Hell throw a cooler full of beer in the trunk of your car, cops have no reason to search your trunk but it's sealed anyhow so you won't get in trouble if they found it. Nobody gives a fuck if you get shitfaced in the parking lot, it's called tailgating.

I used to be able to get water bottle lids with the tamper proof lid seal still intact. I'd just have to buy bottled water, empty the contents, refill with vodka and screw the fresh lid on. Looks like a brand new water bottle.
Worked OK getting into music festivals.
Some people even went as far as buying a 24 pack of water, refilling with vodka and putting the bottles back into the plastic shrink wrap carton.

Semi related.

Music festival. I want to get booze into the arena. No glass, no bottles, and you get searched on the way in unless you roll up stupid early and get waved through while security's hung over from last night.
Not much; maybe 250ml or so of spirits.
Any way without having to find little travel bottles and stash them in my underwear/asshole?

I fill my bicycle water bottle with booze, nobody ever suspects anything

Put your booze in insulin needles, nobody will suspect a thing.

two words: hollow baby

you can thank me later

Right, I'm very confused as I don't live in the states.

1. Why do you need to hide the beer in this growler if you are drinking outside?
2. Why not just crack some tins open at the house or in the car?
3. Why would the cops care if they found a bottle of beer in your trunk?
4. Searches at a stadium?

My advise is to jam one of these in your waistband.

...

Heck, I am FROM the states and I'm also confused.

Alcohol laws vary a lot from state to state (and also from county to county). Many places have what we call an "open container law"--basically, it's illegal to have an open container of an alcoholic beverage within reach of the driver. But in the trunk? No problem at all.

As for the searches at stadiums: there's often some kind of security when you first go through the gates. The idea is to avoid a possible terrorist attack since a major sporting event has thousands of people all in one place. Same thing for concerts, etc.

unless you get patted down I just put flasks in my jean pockets

I was mainly worried about open container laws.

A few fucking bums ruined public drinking for everyone

If you're simply going to chug it before you go into the stadium then where is the risk? It's not as if you're going to be wandering around with the growler in your hand for hours.

But how invasive is the search? Bags checked? Pat downs? Scanners?

I don't see how the growler is simpler than opening cans in the carpark and drinking them quickly, or even jamming a half bottle of vodka down your trousers.

>unless you get patted down
That's literally the search. Mandatory pat-downs so you're not carrying weapons.

Also, it's a festival. Jeans are just stupid for it. Too heavy, too absorbent, too heavy when wet and muddy.

Wear compression shorts and tape some bottles to your leg

went a football game back in 2011 in Baltimore, MD and we drank right outside the stadium before the game. there was a shitload of people out doing the same, a few even had little grills set up and were serving food. no cops said anything. not sure where youre from but it seems to be ok in the US

Usually you get waved through unless you have a bag of some sort. If you do, then they ask you to opwn it then they look inside it for a few seconds and wave you through. They have a lot of people to get through and need to stay efficient.

Christ will you alcoholics go to any length to get drunk?

You could just get a colostomy bag and fill it with a dark IPA. Security will let you pass and you can just drink your beer through the tube straw.

My buddy works for the company and gave me a bucket of these freeze dried alcohol pouches to give out to people, I kept them all and always have a few in my backpack. They work and are easily concealable. just add water or soda

>2016
>worrying about the police

fucking lol

>take rotting baby corpse on flight
>FBI stops and arrests a couple for no apparent raisin, removes the baby from them, and pulls off its blankets

I have had no trouble (CA) during baseball and hockey games. I just fill a nalgene, old water bottle, etc. with cheap vodka and toss it my backpack. Never had a problem, if anything I felt sketchier pouring it in my drinks.

Wear combat boots or if you live in a cold climate, big ass winter boots.

If you're living in a warmer climate, suck it up, wear pants so you can fit about 4 shots worth in tennis shoes and have the pants cover them up.

I go to a decent amount of games in Green Bay every year and always bring in a good 6-8 shots worth of booze with no problem.

Get a female friend to put plastic flexible flasks like the Sharkskin ones in her bra - its easy as hell to do without looking obvious. Alternatively, start wearing cowboy boots to events and tuck the same sort of flasks into the boots. Never been caught or even slightly hassled at any sporting event/concert and they pass through metal detectors just fine.

>ipa
fuck off hipster

The moar you know...

If you're willing to shove things up your butt, just do a wine enema before the Big Event.

This is some undeveloped brain shit right here. One you become an adult, problem solving simple shit like this will become a snap. Until then, be sure to do your chores and brush your teeth.

>hates fun at sporting events

this tbqh

You can reseal water bottles in about 15 minutes. youtube.com/watch?v=abosduPhns4

If not, bring a flat flask, and put it on your crotch right above your cock.

Fill a water balloon with vodka and stick it up your ass. Right when the game starts or whenever you feel most excited just tense up your ass until the balloon pops and you'll get wasted bro

its called tailgating here
where the fuck do you live where you aren't allowed to tailgate?

you tailgate inside the stadium?

read OP's post
hes talking about getting drunk in the parking lot

You passed 3rd grade not knowing how to comprehend what you read?

>The idea is to avoid a possible terrorist attack

Weren't those staged?

You're a good one

Buy a collapsing plastic flask like the rest of us

it is a minor league game and there would be 2k people there max

I don't understand, are you like 19 or something? Just pregame with some cheap alcohol in your car and buy a beer or two in once in the stadium. A flask would work. Pregaming is common, you do it when you're gonna go to expensive bars, clubs, with your friends, you know any party area.

Isn't protocol to soak a tampon in in high proof vodka and insert it into the rectum right before entering the stadium?

Get a case of bottled water. You can boil some water and stick the caps in to make the plastic pliable. Remove the caps, this doesn't break the seal, fill with clear liquor, put caps back on. There, now you have sealed water bottles full of rum/gin/vodka that security won't give a shit about.

This has worked at mountain jam, grassroots, and moe.down for me

Not viable; they take bottles off you at the gate. ANY bottles, opened or unopened.

Drunkenness is literally the only way to enjoy most 'sports' in the US.

I am not willing to shove things up my butt, and wine is expensive as fuck for the alcohol content.
And I don't want to start drunk. I want to maintain a nice buzz.

>The idea is to avoid a possible terrorist attack
no, they make the majority of their money from selling food and beverages so they don't want you bringing your own.

This, what the fuck?

We stay out in the parking lot grilling and drinking beer until we get "kicked in" at the 3rd inning.

You're doing it wrong, OP.

>alcohol
enjoy being WEAK and full of ESTROGEN

that is incorrect at all sporting stadiums. can't speak for concert venues cuz i don't go there often, but you are explicitly allowed sealed

from the mets website for example
>Glass bottles, all metal cans and containers, and hard-sided coolers are not permitted in Citi Field. Guests may bring in one, soft, plastic, factory-sealed water bottles of 20 ounces or less, guests may also bring in one sealed, soft -sided child's juice box. Note: Water bottles and juice boxes may not be frozen.

Chug - drink
Parking lot - car park
Trunk - boot
Growler - minge

>being this afraid of authority
Come on OP have some respect for yourself, you gotta stand up to da man.

>and wine is expensive as fuck for the alcohol content.
Taking alcohol up the ass will mean you get drunk off a tiny amount as the alcohol bypasses the liver and goes straight into the bloodstream.

Assdrink with caution

Growler is a large bottle of beer.

It's also a minge.

Yes, but not in that context.

en route: The open container law(s) means you should have all alcohol in your entire car sealed, ie in a new unbroken seal on a bottle, not in some flask. Keep the chest locked in your trunk if you want it to be utterly safe that's what you do, but know that any search of a trunk is illegal without your permission or probably cause, don't give permission willingly, know the law and be firm (and don't break any laws whatsoever on the way that give them reason to pull you over).

at the stadium before going in: Get yourself a disposable cup like from McDonalds or Taco Bell full of coke and ice straw and all. Have a shot or two of rum ready to go, and pour it in there while in your trunk arranging your umbrella, chair, cushions, putting on your hat, shaking out your windbreaker, changing your shoes, whatever silly reason you have for taking a moment to fiddle with your truck contents, maybe on your phone a bit looking around for your buddies you're meeting. Wait in your car a good while before even getting out if they're parking you by row, to let the people near you come and go. If you want bang for your buck as far as getting wasted, you will simply have sealed higher proof stuff, not fizzy beer. The next part is that you have fully exited your vehicle before you consume, so you're not nailed for the same law.There's nothing illegal about having an ice chest full of ice keeping drinks cold in your trunk, because that's quite normal thing to do, but only if you can't actually reach them while in the car, so truck is good. Some stadiums allow booze in parking lots. If that's the case, open your lawn chair up and take a little break from the drive.
At checkpoint, slurp up that last bit from your cup and drop it in the trash.

When it's winter, I suggest a drink in each work boot, or an extra pocket in the jacket, or even down the pants. Hard in summer.

>But how invasive is the search? Bags checked? Pat downs? Scanners?
Absolutely depends on what kind of important people might be in the stadium that day, the potential boredom of the people at that gate, or the advance threat they heard about that day. It can be same sex patdowns, just bags, or just a visual with a question or two.

They are most of all serving the owners of the stadium so preserving alcohol and water sales is part of their initiative, but also avoiding a long line is definitely a no-no, so you might find the checking a bit more brisk the closer you get to game time. Personally unless I had a job that precluded me from any criminal record whatsoever, I'd risk a couple shots in my jeans pockets. Make sure your shots are something they don't sell inside, like you're some weirdo who only drinks such and such and that you brought that to be happy not to be cheap. To consume within the stadium be discreet as fuck, maybe even taking your coke into the bathroom stall, or having a friend block you from a camera angle to dump that in quickly and dispose of the bottles. Breaking rules on game days involve paddy wagons and slow processing. Be willing to slip a security guy a $50 in a handshake if you get noticed.

Alcohol infusion obviously

The fee basketball games I've gone too I've pregamed in the parking lot throwing away whatever I brought before the checkpoint then either carried a sealed plastic baggie with vodka in it inside of my clothes or asked my gf to put it into her makeup bag in her purse. At the game I'll get a soda and bite a corner of the bag so I can discreetly have pour into the soda. Then grab a beer after I've finished that and maybe a bite to eat. At festivals I just carry a flask.

>this entire fucking thread

I feel like I'm on 420chan. Worrying about if the police pull you over? Jesus.

Pour beer into a catheter bag and just reroute the piss tube from your crotch to your mouth.

If OP is willing to buy a 35$ growler and slip security 50 bucks every single time, it's probably cheaper to just buy the overpriced beverages cause that makes no sense.

Tip: If you're willing to buy stuff to sneak in, better be prepared to lose it at the gates cause you don't want to walk all the way back to your car then wait in line again. It's like how TSA makes people throw away tons of good stuff. They probably keep it and sell it.

what do you think your butt if for stupid

>is illegal without your permission or probably cause
>probably cause
srsly user...you fucking retard

jesus fucking christ

>putting a tampon up your butt

if you blew every guy in the stadium for 1 cup of beer it would be less gay than putting a tampon in your butt

if you know what your seat is you could strap a flask of vodka to the underside of your seat on a day before the event

In post 9/11 America? I think not.

Its a picture of a baby with some text next to it, no sources included.

Do you believe everything you read?

This is rules specific for the festival I'm going to.
No glass on-site at all.
No bottles through security into the arena, to stop people hurling them at the bands they don't like.

It'd also mean I wouldn't be tasting the £30 a bottle rum I'd be 'drinking'. If I wanted to not taste it, I'd have bought store-brand vodka, dammit.

>alchohal
Literally retarded.

>It'd also mean I wouldn't be tasting the £30 a bottle rum I'd be 'drinking'. If I wanted to not taste it, I'd have bought store-brand vodka, dammit.

You felt that was worthy of a post? We're talking about taking alcohol up your ass and you're bitching about how you won't taste it.

If I had to give you a name you'd be "the prime autistian", an autist to surpass all autists.

just eat and drink before the game like a normal person

just tuck your t-shirt in your pants and stick a mickey down your shirt. so easy

dont be poor

Riot punch.

Fagets.

I agree with this sentiment.

I'm most likely an alcoholic, but I use sporting event/music festival prices - and where I'm from "festival-grade" strength - to temper my drinking so I get full enjoyment out of the day. I then go to a local pub and get on it hard afterwards.

If you're going to a sports match to get fucked up, just go to a bar playing that sport on the TV and drink there.

The best

And yet, you took the bait annd replied to it. Who, here, is the bigger idiot?
You. You are the idiot. You contribute nothing to the thread other than shitposting.

It isn't a case of going solely to get drunk it's a case of going for the event but having to be drunk to enjoy it. If you drink enough, you begin to feel numb while sober. Being drunk is the only way to enjoy the moment without constantly questioning the fun you're having.

pic related under heavy sweater filled with beverage of your choice plus rubber tube.
this is how they did it at school parties where alco is prohibited.

where the fuck are the cops going to pull you over? It's not illegal to have beer in your car, and they can't prove you're planning to take it to the stadium. Stadium rules aren't a police matter anyway.

The only thing that might get you is open container, and most states' open container laws don't apply to the trunk, as long as it's a real trunk and not a hatchback.

Do you just pour the alcohol straight into your fucking shoes?

Don't your socks get all wet?

Do people look at you funny when you take off your shoes and start drinking out of them?

>Shiposter lambasting a shitpost

Wew lad, your life so dissonant this your only outlet?

Get hot shiggity shrekt skrub

They like watching sports, so really... why would anyone question the intelligence of anything they do?

I dunno, maybe I'm autistic and don't know it, but the only "sports" I've ever seen that weren't painstakingly boring have been demolition derby's.

Lets get drunk and watch a bunch of overpaid juicers run around arbitrarily in circles in an epic battle of which welfare corporation spent their money the best this year!

Ok, theres no way security is gonna find it, but hows he gonna drink the wine during the game