It's a Hegel tries to save Christianity but ends up destroying it episode

>It's a Wittgenstein tries to convince Russel there is a rhinoceros in the room but ends up threatening him menacingly with a poker episode

>It's a Kant tries to save metaphysics but ends up destroying it episode

>It's a Socrates tries to justify himself and his questioning but makes the jury hates him even more

>Its a Descartes gets called out on his flawed epistemology and write a new book with tons of pissy, half thought out rebuttals episode

>it's a "Marx applies to everything somehow" episode

>It's an Aquinas tries to save philosophy and actually does it, the absolute madman, episode

>it's a "sophistry people will themselves into buying so they don't upset their parents" episode

>It's a Kierkegaard takes a leap of faith but still ends up dying alone episode

>it's a Lacan inspires revolutionary action amongst the students while paradoxically assuming the symbolic role of the very Other against which this action is directed episode

>dad beats him
>dad wonders why son is still scared of him
>son writers letter
>mom is a pussy

Its a Voltaire writes an entire book about the glory of pistachios episode

>it's a Sartre creates an entire philosophy that conveniently would have people not see pedophilia as a bad thing

>it's a muh thesis and antithesis lead to a motherfuckin' synthesis episode

>It's a 'some idiot attributes thesis/antithesis/syntheses mumbo jumbo to Hegel' episode

I believe Lacan to be a wonderful performance artist, really great stuff, maybe the best.

>It's a I don't understand what hegelian dialectic is episode

it's a I've never read Hegel what is the triadic development of an-sich/anderssein/an-und-für-sich episode

>it's an i don't know how to greentext episode

If you think that triad has anything to do with Hegel I can tell with 100% certainty you've never read him.

I'd like to see more Hegel threads on lit tbqh senpai

Only because Hegel called it differently doesn't mean that he does not use the dialectic system. Which he does.

your a robot sir

rec me a hegel intro and i'll buy it right fucking now i'm not joking

Le Greeks

annotated bibliographies on:
Hegel Metaphysics
pastebin.com/svA0VHwV
Hegel: Philosophy of Politics
pastebin.com/rLvsqzNT
Hegel: Philosophy of History
pastebin.com/A6ThjM2Z

hyppolite: genesis and structure in hegel's phenomenology of spirit

Why is Hegel even important? What did he contribute to philosophy?

I don't know man, what Einstein contributed to physics?

>It's a Hobbes tries to justify monarchy's right to rule and ends up undermining it episode

why are philosophers so shit at actually doing what they set out to accomplish lmao

He contributed nothing to philosophy, but everything to pseudo-philosophy.

>it's a Nietzsche tries to warn us about nihilism and the use of metaphysical thinking to hide from it and we completely ignore this core point and run with his deconstructive shit and spend an entire century taking leaps of faith into communism and other political religions to run away from the death of god episode

>it's a Foucault fucks another man in the ass and infects him with AIDs episode

>It's a Sam Harris ends philosophy episode

this looks good

>It's a Zizek OD's on coke but still gives the lecture anyway episode

is foucault even worth anything?

aids propagating

Here's others on:
Marx
pastebin.com/whsJ10F7
Nietzsche
pastebin.com/gY1WwkrX
Enlightenment
pastebin.com/YhGuRFF7
Hobbe's Political Thought
pastebin.com/S1887rqq

other shit:
pastebin.com/u/jonstond2/1

I wonder how many gays his strain killed

Either way you know Russell was turned on and emasculated and wanted Witt to fuck his wife

sjw and gender fluidity comes directly from him

It's a Hemmmingway puts an ad in the classified section but he can only afford a select number of words episode

Wittgenstein was gay tho.

Foucaultian 'everything is political' post-structuralism is literally the sjw vs alt-right debate of today.

I don't think I'd go so far as to say that's worth anything, but he has had influence

Didn't stop Russell's little fire poker from wishing

He would have raised that gay autism baby as his own

that's not dialectics, though.

its End, and, since Marx, its Endnotes

All the SJW bullshit can be traced directly back to Hegel. He is the origin of irrational obscurantism.

I trust you will photoshop it to the best of your abilities.

>its a dickinson uses tired ass slant rhymes and proceeds to be lauded for it episode

>it's a Bob Dylan is on point about 20th century female poets but everyone thinks that makes him misogynist episode

It goes back as far as Kant, but Hegel is shit as well.

>If Hegel’s prostitution to the Prussian state can become speculatively intelligible, this is only at the cost of an etherealization which, ‘in itself, is consummate abjection, deceit, and travesty, or, put succinctly, definitive humanity.

>This is not to provide the ‘justification’ for a ‘dismissal’ of Hegel. Hegel remains strictly unintelligible to us, and any claims to the contrary are anaemic tokens of bourgeois apologetic. Insofar as Bataille depends upon the overcoming of Hegel he is an inanity. That ‘Hegelianism’ is a sad farce of the academy decides nothing as to its eventual sense, and if postmodernity depends upon a ‘decision’ in respect of Hegel it is a culture of accommodation analogous to Hegel’s own crude response to Schelling. The internecine conflict between germinal possibilities of post-Kantian thought is appropriately ‘judged’ by a laughter whose measure is the preponderance of capital within modernity. It is as comic as the hatred Troskyite sects bear for each other as they squabble over the management of a future whose probability slides asymptotically towards zero.

1/?

>Pessimism, or the philosophy of desire, has a marked allergy to academic encompassment. Schopenhauer, Nietzsche, and Freud all wrote the vast bulk of their works from a space inaccessible to the sweaty clutches of state pedagogy, as, of course, does Bataille. The most perfectly distilled attack upon institutional philosophy is probably that found in Schopenhauer’s Parerga and Paralipomena, in its section entitled ‘On University Philosophy’. By the end of this text Schopenhauer has argued that the university is inextricably compromised by the interests of the state, that this necessarily involves it in the perpetuation of the monotheistic dogmas that serve such interests, and that the consequent subservience to vulgar superstition completely devastates it;
degrading it to a grotesquely hypocritical sophistry, fuelled by a petty careerism spiced by an envious hatred of intellectual independence, and articulated in a wretchedly obscure and distorted jargon that allows its proponents both to squirm away from the surveillance of the priests, and to hypnotize a gullibly adoring public. It is scarcely surprising that he comes to conclude:

>if there is to be philosophy at all, that is to say, if it is to be granted to the human mind to devote its loftiest and noblest powers to incomparably the weightiest of all problems, then this can successfully happen only when philosophy is withdrawn from all state influence [Sch VII 200].

>This distaste has been fully reciprocated. One need only take note of Heidegger’s remarks on Schopenhauer to get a taste of the university’s revenge upon its assailants. The crass dismissal of Schopenhauer’s aesthetics in the first volume of Heidegger’s Nietzsche lectures is a quite typical example, and others can be found in Introduction to Metaphysics, his Leibniz lectures, What is Called Thinking, etc. What is at stake in both cases is not argument, however rancorous, but the relation of mutual revulsion between the academy and a small defiant fragment of its outside. Neither recognizes the legitimacy of the other’s discourse; for the university considers its other to be incompetent, whilst the part of this other—admittedly a very small part—that has seized and learnt to manipulate the weaponry of philosophical strife, considers the voice of the university to be irremediably tainted by servility.

2/?

>Hegel remains strictly unintelligible
>proceeds to type the most typical academic verbose hogwash I've ever seen.

>it's an My writing full or uncommented references and jokes and my existence just a blink in time, so nobody will ever truly be able to reconstruct how I really meant it, but I'll just distance the self's purpose from everything that's not nothing, so nobody will ever find an argument against the whole shebang episode

>It's an Anselm creates an ultimately frivolous word game which can 'prove' the existence of anything episode

>DUDE THE DIALECTIC LMAO
>WE'RE LIKE ALL THE SAME AND SHIT
>THE SPIRIT LOL!

He never took the leap

Implying breaking off his engagement to the woman he loved more than anything in the world in order to write his philosophy wasn't taking the leap of faith.

>breaking off his engagement to the woman he loved more than anything in the world in order to write his philosophy

christians truly are cucks to the bitter end

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I had to travel both.

Hegel? More like BEAGLE!

>it's a Walt Whitman has to furiously travel around New York trying to erase his embarrassing past before Emerson pops in for dinner

Just be yourself.

damn nigga looks like Oliver Reed, or should it be the other way around?

Aww you saved my picture :)

I think you mean bagel.

>its a emily bronte doesn't know how to write and everyone mistakes it for brilliant usage of run on sentences episode

>Try to teach people to stop being hedonists.
Everybody fails as soon as you are dead.

I like to think of Hegel as the feyman of the humanities: a hack.

>It's an Augustine properly defines Christianity but everyone else is too much of a pussy to follow him episode

the cringiest samefag ive seen in a while

I just spent 10 minutes trying to think a way of communicating that I greatly enjoyed this post without it sounding gay, and eventually settled on this

>it's a Borges spends three days trying to find a book he wanted to read before realising he'd made the book up

Doesn't get better than this folks.

This. As soon as someone mentions Hegel I discard everything they say.

According to Hegel, you have a chance at a happy life.

According to Hegel,

>the sound of someone pooping their pants fills the corridor, something something transcendental Jesus dialectic

>It is Foucault saying that all are repressed people trying to enforce their ideology that is conceived of previous repression and to even more oppress them and being misrepresented even more for repressing oneself.

if you ever read humanities at a university he's bound to pop up
it's not like knowing stuff is worthless even if you don't like the person that came up with it

classic

> It's a Descartes attempts to unite philosophy with the sciences but ends up permanently divorcing them episode

>its a Kant tries to fix epistemology, ethics, and metaphysics then proceeds to do so, the absolute madman! episode

>It's a Bloom tries to "get" postmodern new sincerity but he can't discern any talent episode

Thanks family (no homo)

...

This guy (in your pic) walked right by me yesterday afternoon. He told me to tell you he says "Hi."

He's fairly overrated (most cited author of all time in the humanities), but pretty brilliant nonetheless. Definitely worth reading. And don't listen to all the shitposters trying to link him to SJWs. He would probably loath SJWs.

Keep it in the family.

Even if homo

>its a ben stiller episode

>It's a Pound tries to save poetry but ends up destroying it episode

>tfw you will never walk through night-time Venice without hordes and hordes of Chinese and Russians shoving their cameras everywhere