Post the first page of your favourite novel as translated from the gizoogle textilizer.
STATELY, PLUMP BUCK MULLIGAN CAME FROM THE STAIRHEAD, bearin a funky-ass bowl of lather on which a mirror n' a razor lay crossed. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! A yellow dressin gown, ungirdled, was sustained gently-behind his ass by tha mild mornin air yo. Dude held tha bowl aloft n' intoned:
-- Introibo ad altare Dei.
Halted, he peered down tha dark windin stairs n' called up coarsely:
-- Come up, Kinch. Come up, you fearful jesuit.
Solemnly his schmoooove ass came forward n' mounted tha round gunrest yo. Dude faced bout n' pimped gravely thrice tha tower, tha surroundin ghetto n' tha awakin mountains. Then, catchin sight of Stephen Dedalus, his thugged-out lil' punk-ass bent towardz his ass n' made rapid crosses up in tha air, gurglin up in his cold-ass throat n' bobbin his head. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Stephen Dedalus, displeased n' chilly, leaned his thugged-out arms on tha top of tha staircase n' looked coldly all up in tha bobbin gurglin grill dat pimped him, equine up in its length, n' all up in tha light untonsured hair, grained n' hued like pale oak.