Asparagus

You don't, ideally

If you're desperate you could chop it up into 2 inch pieces and shove it up your ass, or even better just eat it raw

>>Is this the type of scrap used to make stock?
>yes. you can also puree it to make creamed asparagus soup.

You cannot really puree asparagus ends, they are too stringy...unless you want to spend 45 minutes pushing your puree through a chinois or tamis with a rubber spatula to get 1 cup of usable puree.

Don't tell the guy lies just because you've never owned a decent blender

>my stupid fucking sister
post pics

A Vitamix? Really, if you want an asparagus puree then use the good part. The ends are only good for a base stock to thin your puree as needed.

that isn't white asparagus

>I pay less than that for Mexican Asparagas here in Australia
wot, where? they're $2 per bunch at Coles right now.

what the fuck

it needs oil, salt, and pepper

have you literally never cooked food before?