Hello Veeky Forums,
As one of the more intelligent corners of the internet, I wanted to share some thoughts with you, so that you could either expand upon or rubbish them with your learnedness and erudition.
One of the big reasons we strive for self-improvement - or, indeed, strive to create great works of art - is to appear attractive to the opposite sex, to make ourselves more worthy of the affection of others. The /r9k/ mentality is often rebutted by merchants of personal growth, people who advise the loveless and allegedly unlovable to go to the gym, start reading more, or do some other such salutary activity that will make them more romantically and/or sexually desirable.
I've been reading a lot on the Matching Hypothesis, which states, to quote Wikipedia, "that people are more likely to form and succeed in a committed relationship with someone who is equally socially desirable"[1]. This assertion is then backed up by quite a range of studies, all employing varying methodologies and arriving at (pretty much) the same conclusion: we're better off with those who share our 'social worth' (physical attractiveness being the main ingredient here).
All very well, you might say, but surely we should aspire to make ourselves have more social worth so as to find and flourish in a relationship with a 'better' partner?
The thing is, when you 'fall' for someone, whatever they were both (i.e. a 6/10, to use the tried-and-tested scale) they instantly shoot up to what is effectively a 10. You might objectively recognize that they are still a 6.5, but for all intents and purposes they're now a 10. This thought came to when I realized that the three girls I've had proper feelings for in my life have all been of a similar level of attractiveness, and that this might be more than a mere coincidence, and that I'm probably the equivalent thereof in male terms. What's more, when I had feelings for each of these girls, they were the only person I wanted to be with - no substitute, even if objectively possessing more social worth, would have done.
What's the point, then, in striving to make ourselves more attractive to the opposite sex? The Matching Hypothesis is the great leveler, ensuring the propagation of the human species by giving even the most hideous of our race the capacity to find and be happy with someone else.
tl;dr: self-improvement for the sake of romance is pointless, 'cus the Matching Hypothesis sorts us all out in the end.
