Why do you hate me so much, Veeky Forums? Is it just because I'm successful and you're not?

Why do you hate me so much, Veeky Forums? Is it just because I'm successful and you're not?

Curious, what exactly is wrong with Coelho's texts? Why are they so bad?

>creating and bumping a thread for the blatant purpose of prompting someone to post your pasta
Yeah yeah we still remember it, you've left your mark, nice work and all, off you go now

There is a pasta? I haven't actually seen it. I-I'm sorry... I got into an argument with a retarded friend about Coelho being shit, and instead of reading The Alchemist I wanted the 5 minute version from Veeky Forums...

I am Brazilian, nationality that, to my shame, is the same as Coelho’s. You want to know what is the problem with Paulo Coelho? Here's the problem:

>a) As a writer.

He is a writer whose books deal only with esoteric themes, new age topics, pseudo-spiritualism and especially religion (a lot of religion). Paulo Coelho writes what people in general (and we all know that the general population does not have anything remarkable in the mental department) want to hear: he talks about the power of the human soul; about God and God's love for everyone; about things like “if you really want something and wish something, than this something will happen for the whole universe is going to conspire to make it happen [go tell that to terminal cancer patients who wish with all their souls, with all the juices in their bodies, the heat in their blood and marrows to just keep on living]”; he speaks that everyone can achieve great things and be significant (usually by just wanting to be so); he pseudo-philosophizes about life after death; talks about his own “experiences” with angels and demons, and so on. In other words: he is just a mix between a self-help writer and a dishonest-priest.

1/2

I don't even know who you are

>b) As a human being.

Paulo Coelho is a despicable person. In reality he is a coward that poses as some kind of saint and guru (and anyone with half a neuron knows what gurus are made with). Some examples of the glorious life achievements of this fellow: when he was young he hit a child with a car and fled the spot with fear; in his youth he was also just a scrawny and shy, a fearful and frightened boy (his surname, Coelho, means rabbit, which is appropriate, since this animal is shy and fragile), but today he loves to tell interviewers about how he was "wild" and "crazy" in this days of youth, and that he was able to fight the demon, sober up and, after long years of toil, changed himself into a much more spiritual and enlightened being. He says he can control the weather and see angels and stuff like that (now, anyone who makes such claims is either psychotic or a charlatan, and Coelho’s eyes look too much like the eyes of a dead-fish to indicate that he actually suffers from some sort of mental illness – what remains is charlatanism). In fact you cannot see an interview with Paulo Coelho without wanting to vomit with his air of superiority and the faker-look. He once had an affair with a woman and got her pregnant. After undergoing an abortion, she had a heavy depression. Coelho encouraged her to attempt suicide (hiss reasons were that he through that such mystical and psychoanalytic approach, a kind of shock therapy, could help her). Paulo Coelho (in a biography written about him) appears forging the signature of his own father, plagiarizing a text from Carlos Heitor Cony (another Brazilian writer) and giving interviews about a meet with John Lennon that never happened. He is, in short, a bad character.

He is that typical character of Portuguese-catholic morals: that kind of people who talks about god and religion and saints and reading the bible but that are constantly acting like cowards and weak-willed sinners. You know, the 2 things that the suburbs and neighborhoods have in greater quantity in catholic countries are churches and bars: this is the typical contradiction of this kind of culture. People rant about Jesus and Mary and the holy ways that will conduct you to heaven and think that it is a big sin to miss Church, but this same people, after church and work, will go to the bars and drink all their salaries in cachaça, and gossip about others, and don’t pay the bills, and don’t go to school, and lie, and cheat, etc.

It is no wonder that Protestant countries in Europe are richer, wiser and much more organ ized and cultured than Catholic ones.

Thanks!

>bad character
Mal-caráter is better translated as "hack".
t. another BR

I tried reading the devil and miss prym but I dropped it at page 1. The writing was completely incompetent.

fucking roasted, god damn.

That being said, I enjoyed The Alchemist. And the idea that anything can come true if you want it bad enough -- while maybe untrue (as per your cancer patient example) -- is one that is inspiring, within my own personal context.

>and anyone with half a neuron knows what gurus are made with
Why shit on Gurus? Sikhi is probably the religion that I find the most tasteful.

I'm not saying anything about how it's practiced today, what any individual Sikhs do, etc., but about what the religion actually expresses as its beliefs and ideals.

isn't that the mythbusters guy

you forgot the main reason to hate him

he said Joyce was a talentless hack who did nothing for literature

desu I hate slightly fat bald 40-50 year olds with those thick rimmed black glasses and gay shitty facial hair. They all look like smug pedophiles.

Can you imagine someone looking like that having sweaty loud sex?

Just disgusting. I will never look like that when im that old, I will recede with confidence and make sure I don't look like a smug intellectual faggot.

My dad used to drive a "Colectivo", word used to describe the type of cab with a fixed route common in parts of South America, and someone forgot "The Alchemist". I remember reading it just like but feeling like the way he explained things and how the book was trying to represented the writer as
I read another book of his and it was more of the same.

why do you even imagine them having sex...

I just imagine how someone who looks like a slimeball like that having cardio problems fucking a fat prostitute, sweat running down his knob shaped head to his gross goatee. Adjusting positioning in a vain and clunky manner in the heat of the act, like a fat kid in dodgeball. And then he goes home and writes like he thinks his shit doesn't stink. Look at that smug face. That's his natural face he makes for a camera, you know he thinks he's the shit. All that cocaine he can afford.

BR here. Coelho is a self-help tier hack.

BR here. Funny story:

My father in law actually sent a letter with pictures of him burning Jorge Amado's books to him when he published an article defending Coelho.

That should give you a sample of the level this guy actually is. Someone felt compelled to send a real life shitpost, AND PAID FOR IT, because that someone defended him once.

My brother, a total pseud in all of his tastes, was bloviating about The Alchemist and its sequel (I guess he wrote a sequel, I don't know I zone out when he recommends things). Since he suggested it, I already had a low opinion of him. Seeing the author's douchey mug and given my negative predisposition towards conventional lifestyle advice and new age mumbo jumbo, I've gone from uninterested to irritated.

I'm still mad at him for that one.