Hey Veeky Forums

It's quite possible here. This country is far more relaxed about what career one might have, how much money and so on. It's very easy to find a job as well, which is why I'm not concerned about having the year to myself. A neighbor I will have at the cabin even runs the local library, and I know he is likely to give me work should I ask.

Not true, when I was 21 I wrote a book and it interested a publisher. But then when they finally responded to my submission I withdrew interest because it wasn't something I wished to be associated with. I've written another novel since but it wasn't very good, but it was at least "mature". Now I am writing another which is very promising and I have another planned for that but it'll take a long time to write. Time is all I need.

>and so on

Pardon me?

The reason I say "so on" instead of articulating myself in full is because I am filled with an immense inner store of ambition and creative energy, though I appreciate few people would take the time to read a post if it properly represented this capacity I possess. I have no doubts that I am among the next generation of young Norwegian novelists, and that my ability will be appreciated upon the publication of my first book. It truly feels as though my life is soon going to change in ways I cannot currently fathom.

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post a pic OP :3

>tfw no qt Norwegian bf

>But then when they finally responded to my submission I withdrew interest because it wasn't something I wished to be associated with
explain

it's called broken dreams and despair

How do you get food? Are there grocery stores?

it's not the fucking utah desert

Here is a photo of me.

I wrote a novel in the months after leaving university (I can write a great deal of words in a small amount of time without sacrificing quality). I admit I hadn't finished writing it, though I had sent them the entire story so it was all planned out. But they took around five months to respond to me, which was around one month more than they said they would. And by that time I had read far more books and realized I didn't like what I had written. Reading it again recently I found it funny and pretty "cute", but still it was too much like "YA", and the title was actually an obscure reference to a passage in Catcher in the Rye where they discuss the eskimos in his sister's diary and at the museum. So instead of associating myself with it I simply explained that I had second thoughts and asked to withdraw. Occasionally I regret it though I think if I had published it I would likely not have developed in a way I since have, in the sense of wanting to write something that does not employ the kind of humour I employed in my first book, which was rather childish and so on. In the book a young boy returns to school after his father has died. There is a new girl at the school, who is quiet and who is from a poor family. She is being followed by a guy who the narrator distrusts and who blackmails her with some information from her past. The narrator has one friend who is obsessed with conspiracy theories and who keeps talking about UFOs. Eventually he asks the narrator to accompany him to a local hill outside the town to await a UFO visit he believes will take place, and we discover that the friend is homosexual. A lot more happens too but this is the basic background to the novel, and it was written largely with an audience in mind, but an audience I no longer wish to appeal to. It was pretty funny though and fortunately I possess both a penetrating genius and a very unique sense of humour. I realize the book as I have described it seems perhaps a little boring or over dramatic but you asked me to explain so I did.

kek

good humour m8

Fortunately though without my intending it I have already experienced a great deal of despair and disillusion in my young life. While others my age have experienced love and novelty and so on I have toiled in misery and under the weight of a frustrating routine. But despite this I have retained my purity and ambition and if anything the enforced structure on my life has benefited my writing ability.

you seem very intelligent and like a good person, how did you become that way, and how can i become more like you? thanks

Thank you

I can either cycle to a shop (though I may purchase a second-hand car) or I will probably just get a lot of food each weekend for either one or two weeks.

Are you being sarcastic? I don't really value intelligence, not as much as I used to. And in a practical sense I am not very intelligent, as I have failed to attain so far a happy life or at least a lifestyle that doesn't feel like a burden. If you're not being sarcastic I don't know what to say, though if you ask more specific questions I will answer them.

You sound like a more articulate Elliot Rodger.

Finnes det i det hele tatt noen som leser nyutgitt norsk litteratur, med unntak av anmeldere?
Har du stipend, eller noe lignende, hvor gammel er du nå, og hva jobbet du som?

Thank you. I have read his book and also many articles about his life. I believe his book was very entertaining, and that is possessed (even if he didn't realize it) a style and consistency that I believe is quite representative not only of his personality but of a more general "type" of contemporary young man.

I am 24 years old. And yes, look at Karl Ove Knausgård for an example of a popular literary Norwegian author. His works are very good, both his memoirs and his other novels. Also Johan Harstad is quite good, and some other modern writers are ok but I won't list them all. I don't have a scholarship or anything like that. I considered staying at university to study writing but I am not from a rich family and I worried too much about finding a job, which I eventually did after graduating. I know what the novel I am writing is to be about, and I believe I am very close to knowing the exact style and tone I want to write it in. I have attempted "serious" writing and failed because it was too boring. I have tried "humorous" writing but failed because it was desperate and hollow. Now I try to write in a way that is honest, concise and genuine.

How close is it to Sweden? Might have to drill with the local militia to prepare to defend your borders from the caliphate of Swedistan.

It's not very close to Sweden. I would prefer to give an exact figure of the distance from the address to the nearest Swedish border, as I tend to avoid saying things like "not very close" or "tall" or "old" as these are largely subjective attributes which are associated with a specific time period or cultural phase, but I don't want to do that right now.

my family has a house on a lake in rural NH that no one uses in the winter - thinking i should do some shit like this

*sniff*

can i come stay with you op?

If you are male: no

If you are female: perhaps

Sorry for your grandmother but you should probably not waste her corpse. Did you send her corpse to a science organization? It's better than it being worthless rotting in a wooden box.

This thread is making me desperate.

OP truly is a great mind

She was cremated after her funeral. My cousins and I carried her coffin from her home into the hearse. Then we carried it from the hearse into the church. I was the tallest person carrying it and the coffin slipped off my shoulder for a moment and some people noticed but I regained my grip. I also placed my hand around my cousin's waist beside me and I lifted the back of his blazer, which he must have found a little embarrassing. On the way back to the hearse I kept stepping on the back of another cousin's shoes. The coffin was so heavy even though she was around 154 centimeters tall. My cousin joked that my grandmother was wearing her "famous lead shoes" which I found funny. In the "party" after the funeral one of my distant aunts and another woman who was probably related to me told me I was handsome and asked if I knew her daughter. I said no and she said she is very beautiful, but the other woman interrupted her to say "they can't date, they're related!" and in an attempt at humour I said "fifty years ago nobody would have cared!" but they both looked at me as though I was serious and strange.

What do you mean by "desperate"?

Are you being sarcastic?

>OP truly is a great mind
He does sound like he has autism.

1. Desesperado. Com desespero.
2. No but I am being ironic.

I disagree with that co opted term

You wasted energy that we will never have back because of entropy. Why didn't you just cook her and get the most energy back from eating her body? It's the most efficient way to receive what energy her body contained without donation to science. You failed me, OP. It's not gross, you know, people used to eat their families after they died.

I don't believe I suffer from autism though I can understand why you may think I do, and if a medical professional diagnosed me as autistic I would accept the diagnosis.

I quite liked you OP until you started being a cunt. Don't be a cunt.

I can only attempt to express myself honestly and the only way I can do this is by refusing to censor myself for the sake of an expected audience. However I admit that what I wrote in the post you're replying to was written partly as a joke. I mean since I understand the context of my life and how unbearable and even pathetic it is, writing that seems humorous in contrast. However I am confident in my ability and although this is something I struggle with a great deal very often I do believe I am incapable of at least achieving what I aspire to achieve.

Post an exerpt, however short, of your work in norwegian please.

Even just a good length sentence.

Southern NH here, mah nigga

I'm not sure if you're slightly autistic or just REALLY Scandinavian. I think I like you but I don't think I could spend an extended length of time with you.

How many girlfriends have you had in your life so far?

Although I appreciate your interest in my work I feel that by posting anything from it in thread I am only inviting people to criticize and attempt to humiliate me, and since I admit I am a very sensitive and rather self-loathing individual I know that I will remember what people say and use it as evidence against myself should I find myself regretting my decision to move out there at any time. I can accept criticism if it is reasoned and offered in a way that does not simply aim to humiliate, though with only one sentence I don't believe I can really deliver anything substantial that will allow people to appreciate my style or the wider value of my work. However, I will post the first sentence of the book that was rejected around 30 times in English so more people can read:

>"Magnus realized, with a sort of laugh, that every joke he had recently heard had been told by himself, to himself, and at his own expense."

The book is largely about a young man who is unemployed following his studies but is eventually invited to write the biography of an obscure Norwegian writer whose works have fallen out of fashion for decades. He takes the opportunity and travels to the author's home and in attempting to make the author's life interesting he himself realizes how uninteresting his own life must seem. The book then in part tells of his own efforts to make his life interesting but his struggles to do so in a way that is genuine, and his struggle with the idea that he values routine and security too much to experience the kind of novelty many of his peers are pursuing in their youth. Again, this is the basic outline of the book.

I don't think you would enjoy my company. Although I don't believe I am a narcissist I believe I certainly have narcissistic tendencies and that my disposition would encourage you to assume that I am haughty, pretentious or simply sober and boring. I do enjoy communicating with people in a way that is frank and honest however, and people have tended to become quite comfortable in my company rather quickly and told me things about themselves that are very personal. Perhaps because I seem like an empathetic fellow, or perhaps because I seem like a submissive audience who won't interrupt them.

Maybe I just like the idea of you then. If that makes sense.

When I was around eight years old I dated a girl with an "exotic" first name who most people considered the most beautiful girl in our class. She was "wilder" than me but attracted to my sense of humour, which was at that time not confined to my writing. We held hands below the desk in the classroom, but as I sat on her left and held her hand with my right hand, my schoolwork suffered and I was occasionally told off by the teacher.

When I was around twelve years old I dated a girl who I talked to at the winter fair in school. My mother was selling traditional wooden objects on a foldable table and on other tables were games and foods and so on. Some rough guys began to pick some of the wooden objects up and act as if they were stealing them. I became very defensive and nervous and stood by the table for a long time, until the girl I would eventually date looked at me in a way that invited me to walk over to her. I kissed her while three or four of her friends, including another girl I would date, watched, and our tongues entered each others mouth.

When I was around thirteen years old I dated a shy girl who nobody seemed to notice, who was from a poorer area but did not act like most of the girls from her area, who were also her friends. We held hands, but very rarely. During a school sports event she fell over a hurdle and walked back to her seat crying with her friends around her. At that time she was beginning to become popular due to various reasons, including the fact her friends had become familiar with the kind of boys who pursued girls, and because the subtle beauty I had identified and appreciated was now becoming something more people were beginning to notice. I approached her seat while she cried but there were so many people there I felt insecure and did not risk placing my arm around her when she didn't respond to me and returned to my own seat. We rarely talked after that, and I always looked at the ground when we passed in the hallways.

When I was twenty-two a girl at a bar I briefly worked at asked the boss for my number and contacted me asking me to see a movie. We went to the cinema and returned to her bedsit. There we talked for around seven hours, until around 5am, at which point I hugged her and left. We then saw two or three more movies and after one of them she visited my flat and asked to see my bedroom. In the bedroom she laid on my bed and then got under the blanket. I stood nearby with my hands in my pockets leaning against the wall. She then invited me to lay down too and I laid down on top of the duvet. We dated for around three weeks.

Yes, I suppose so. Thank you.

so you're still a virgin? and you're 24? yeah, you're a scandie alright

learn how to create your own alcohol, i suggest kilju it's really easy to make

So yes, you are an autist.

What are you talking about? The Nordics fuck early and often. This guy has Asperger's or something.

FISTING
I
S
T
I
N
G

I heard from pic related that the norsk state buys like 1000 of every published book written in norge. Is that true? Does that means that you are going to get some money right off the bat even if it doesnt sell well? Also, what do you think about Tor Ulven and other untranslated norwegian authors? I'm learning the language at the moment and already know the basic. Do you think it's worth it for their literature alone?

Running that kilju through a still is even better.

I recommend translation Zapffe's work for us.

You're a lucky cunt.

This is that 100 post user again.

Newfags, there is a poster who constantly creates really elaborate schemes to mess with people by getting them to feel sympathy for his character and then slowly dissolve into autism, it usually always begins with calling himself a genius (I've noticed this pattern) he used to joke about his 6 volume memoir or this time that he paid a publisher to publish his book and he scheduled a book signing at a barnes and noble where only his mom came and bought 3 copies of the book. He does this because he's admitted he has nothing else in life and gets some sort of pleasure out of it, anyway, he had me going for a little bit until I saw him descend into cunty autism but the nail in the coffin is this quote that he always uses when people ask to see his writing in these threads (because it's pretty good but it comes from an archived post from years ago back when warosu was up, someone else found that one out, he usually takes any written material from past critique threads but almost always this one):

>"Magnus realized, with a sort of laugh, that every joke he had recently heard had been told by himself, to himself, and at his own expense."

Anyway OP, you should really find something else to occupy your time if this is all you really have.

don't bully memoire-kun he's an entertaining laddo

I was getting those memoir vibes from this guy. Good we have an archivist itt.

Shame is not getting answer'd then.

This reads like a copy pasta

I kekked my add off reading this. Duck it was funny not even joking. My girlfriend looked at me like retard but when I read it out with tears in my eyes she just stared at me

...

spend the time solving philosophy

im jealous

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They do buy 1000, or maybe it's even more. They also put them in libraries etc. do it here in Denmark as well.

>When I was around eight years old I dated a girl
>eight years old
you mean you had playdates with her lmao

Would Veeky Forums take a year out if they could?

Wouldn't employers be skeptical as fuck about you if you took that much time out?

>2015
>going full walden

Do you have an ungly wife and a weird kid ? Then you could the the Shining there. They also would have a harder time to hide from you than in the move :)

>Do you think it's worth it for their literature alone?
Not that guy but no. Så bra boker har vi ikke.

>Karl Ove Autistgard

I say go with it. Diary of a Man-Virgin

New Hampshire is paradise

Can you set up a Veeky Forums commune so we can all come around bring some beers and write/shitpost/critque together?

>implying this isnt a new form of literature

OP have you ever had any male friends?

'sup Eliot.

>New Hampshire
No such thing.

Massholes are literally the cucks of state govt. They get raped daily to pay for ghettos in boston and springfield.

>Massholes are literally the cucks of state govt.
Nope. They're too busy taking over the rebellious non-state to the north.

Sounds pretty fucking rad, OP

Hopefully you have a decent amount of money saved up. Cost of living up in Scandinavia is ridiculous. Ideally you could swing a way to work from your CPU (if you get internet there) to swing a couple bucks a month.

Either way, that's badass. All my relatives were cuck'd into coming to America so I will never be gifted a cabin in Northern Europe :(

Why don't you just buy a small cabin in rural Maine, Alaska, Minnesota, or Upper Michigan?

come to the promised land user

No I don't have a wife or a child.

If there any girls here who would like to visit me I would be willing to organize something providing they are svelte.

It will actually be quite cheap. I will live on a basic diet and I don't really eat very much anyway. I will not have to pay rent or for electric. My main cost will be travel but if the neighbour is still there I imagine he will offer to drive me into the town whenever he is going in.

Because I feel like I can somehow get laid in Europe, just by being an American...

With ugly desperate hoes maybe.

works for me

BUMP

Jesus Christ, this has to be the most elaborate bait I have ever witnessed.

This is awesome, I'm fuckin jealous. Throw in some type of meditative activity where you don't do anything for 40 minutes or so each day

fuck off homofag

OP here.

Requesting more attention.

Thanks.

I enjoyed reading this passage
Nice work OP